In this episode of Better to Better, I share why living a full life is an essential foundation for dating, healing from breakups, and managing stress. I walk you through starting with the dream—vision boards, journaling, and visualizations—to define what a full life looks and feels like for you in the next year to five years. I offer practical examples from my own life, from solo city getaways and low‑stakes solo outings to building experiences with friends and family, and I explain how purposeful experiences naturally raise your standards and expand your sense of what’s possible.
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Jessica Chastain
https://www.imdb.com/name/nm1567113/
[00:00:02]
Unknown:
Welcome to the Better to Better podcast. Today, we are talking about living a full life. But before we get to that, I would just like to inform you that my email list is now open. So if you check the show notes of this episode, you will see a link to join my email list. With my email list, you will get weekly emails, like, once a week in which you, are informed of dating advice and ongoings and all sorts of things regarding, programs that I open or information that's helpful to know about what's going on around the Coach Tracie camp.
But most importantly, dating support, advice, guidance, etcetera. So I highly recommend that you join my email list. Check the link. And moving forward in the show notes of the episodes, you'll be able to find the link there to register for the email list. Also, just know about my website, which is coachtracy.life, c0achtracie.life, is my website. You can go there to register for the email list. And, also, there is where you get all the info you need regarding the products and services I offer and all that good stuff, which will be very important over the next few months because a lot's gonna be going on, but I'll keep you posted about that as we go. So welcome to today's episode, create a full life. With me, one thing that you know if you have been listening for a bit or will know is that with all of the, advice I would give on dating, on recovering from breakups, on managing stress in your life, I will always be a proponent of you living a full life, of you designing, building, and executing on the life you want to have. And that starts with having an idea of what that life is. Actually thinking, dreaming, wondering, exploring.
What do I want for myself? What do I want for myself and my kids? What do I want for my world now and in the future? Now, in the near future, in the distant future, what do I see for myself? And I always say start with dreaming because it's very easy for us to shut ourselves down from what we want by allowing experience and logic and fear to flood in and say, well, this is why I can't do that, or it will be too hard. And it's not that that the logic or the experience or the fear are not legitimate things or very real or maybe even accurate at times, but it's that they stop you from being able to even create a plan.
So always start with the dream. I would love to travel here or have a house here or have this experience or go to this event or be able to buy this thing. Whatever it is, start with the dream, which is why, you know, vision boards are great. Scripting in a journal, scripting is writing something out as if it's already happened. Visualizations, all the various things that we can do to help ourselves see, feel, and be in an experience that we want to have. So starting with the dream. So what is, like, what is the dream of your full life? What is going on? What is happening for you? Let's say in the next five years or the next year, what does a full life feel like to you?
Because then you start looking into ways that you can get that or mimic that or come close to that. Right? And so I know for me, especially during my dating, journey, it was very important to me that I engaged in the things that I would want to be engaging in when I found my partner. So for me, that meant things like trips to the city and and the city being New York City, taking myself out there, going there to meet meet up with friends, going there just to do, activities that I wanted to do, a Broadway show, certain museum, try certain restaurants, random pop ups and events that would happen there. And me just going and engaging in those things for my enjoyment, but also for, like, practice.
Practice on doing it with somebody who I romantically would bring into my life. One of the biggest examples of this for me was when I celebrated my birthday. Now that would be, like, two years ago. I very intentionally got a hotel for two nights and took myself out to New York City. And the parts of the city that I enjoyed, that I had wanted to visit, stayed in a hotel that I was very interested in staying in, and decided for my birthday, this is what I'm doing for myself. And I am so happy I did that. One, because it was just fun to go and have those experiences. But two, I felt like I very much leaned into an experience that I very much wanted to continue to have in my life, whether single or in a relationship with someone. And so with that, I really got to, like look. It's I've talked about this before on the chase, the the, great date feeling, where, like, having experience of a really good date, like, kind of automatically uplevels your expectations and your standards and what you'll tolerate and won't tolerate and what you strive for when being dated.
Same sort of thing happens with engaging in experiences that you enjoy when you're like, oh, this feels really nice. Like, I am really enjoying this experience or the feeling of this experience or the people who are around me in this experience or the environment or the things that I'm being exposed to due to this experience. That experience could be a really good meal at a restaurant. That experience could be a hotel you stay in. That experience could be somewhere you travel. That experience could be some activity or event that you are at.
That experience could be engaging in some particular thing with certain people, and it makes you feel good. But when you have those moments, it just kind of uplevels your expectations for yourself in your life when it comes to enjoyable activities and things you want to be doing. So I know for me, you know, when I was thinking about how have I leaned into living a full life, some things that are, like, more like, recently, let's say because right now, as I'm recording this, it's the very October 2025. So if we say throughout this summer, this past summer, I like, I have my list here. I, did a whole so, like, starting in May, me and my sister went to the cowboy carter show, in Jersey and made that also into, my dress fitting for my wedding, and I picked my dress.
We ended up going, and seeing death becomes her on Broadway, and and we're surprised to find that Michelle Williams was still, in the show because we we had thought she she had finished, but we're just watching. And then, boom, here's Michelle. Like, it just was like, okay. Just kept giving and giving and giving. We also me and my sister did a little Euro summer. We went to Paris and London, in July, and that was awesome. It was my first time to both those places, her second time. So much fun. But these are things that we're like, we wanna do these things. We want to live these things. Side note, the the Euro, summer, the that trip was supposed to happen back in 2019, but then I got pregnant with my youngest son. So we had to resell our Spice Girl, tour tickets, like, reunion tour tickets.
So that was a long time coming, that trip. But, look, we did it, and I'm so happy we did. Then I went to Michigan with Josh and the boys to see his parents. That was fun. And then, me and a friend went to the city to see a comedian, Jasmine w, who I'd followed on social media for a while. And then I saw she was doing a show, and I was like, hey. You wanna go? Like, yeah. Let's do it. So we just made a little night of that. And then there were a group of friends who we were supposed to go, to a polo match. The weather did not agree with that, so we had to pivot. We ended up going to this, fun place that we hadn't been to before where they have, like, wine on tap. That was wonderful. I loved that. Also, a friend, we were supposed to go see Cabaret in the city, but, Billy Porter had sepsis and, like so had to, like, they had to cancel the show. It was really that's really sad.
And, so we didn't end up going to the show, but we still made it a day in the city and explored and and visited, places, like, from, her past. And it was a great night, a wonderful night. We just leaned into having a good time, enjoying the city, enjoying each other's company, having food, finding, like, street, you know, fairs and and stuff like that, and singing show tunes at the end of the night with wait. Jessica. Oh my gosh. Shin. Oh my gosh. I will put I will put her name in the show notes. The woman it's so bad because she was like, oh my gosh. Is that Jessica?
Not champagne. Chastain. Jessica Chastain. Mhmm. And I was like, I don't know I don't know who that is. And then she looked it up and showed me. I was like, oh, okay. She was in The Help. She was in Interstellar. She was in The Martian. She was in a bunch of stuff. And we ended up sending standing there for, part of the night at a bar singing, show tunes, and it was glorious. But, yeah, like, those are just some examples. What else do we have? Upcoming in November, I'm going to see Iann LaVincent, have a talk in the city with a couple of friends. I, in the past, have done, RBGs, which just stands for rich bitch getaways with my best friend.
We've done two of them so far, one to Vermont, one to New York City. The goal was to do it annually. COVID got in the way, and then life got in the way. We live in different states, right now, but that's always the thing that's on the docket of, like, oh, we should do Napa. You know, we should do, Napa Valley for one of them, or we should do this place or that place. So, like but being very intentional in identifying the things you want to do or experience, the things you want to experience. So start out with that. Because I think, again, going into this idea of dreaming, when we, when we think of it as things I want to experience rather than things I want to do, I do think it creates more of a dreaming element because, sometimes it's things that we're saying, oh, I want to experience this, but I would never do it by myself, or I'd never do it on my own, or I wouldn't be the person to make it happen. Someone else will make it happen for me. And that's fine to want to have someone else make the thing happen for you or to not wanna do it by yourself, such as, let's say, solo travel. But when it comes to actually planning and coming up with the things that you want for your life, it is helpful to think of it as what you want to experience regardless of who does it or doesn't do it because then you you you dream bigger, then you actually identify things you really want to do.
And you're more likely to be able to set up a plan to do them. That solo trip to the city for my birthday for two nights was not something that was ever on my radar in terms of, like, a solo thing. It was on my radar in terms of, sure. I'd you know, I'm always up for spending a night in the city, you know, with friends, maybe for New Year's or for, you know, as a celebration or something like that. But it wasn't until that year that I really considered, like, why not go yourself? And what I did was I made plans, right, that of things that I wanted to do, but also I arranged to have a few friends meet me for dinner. So I had a little bit of, group time with people, but I had a lot of solo time. And it was one of the best trips that I've done, one of the best little, you know, activities that I just went and did for myself.
I did I've done a couple of other more, local solo, ventures for myself, usually around some sort of restaurant that I wanted to visit, and sitting at the bar and chatting with the bartender, having a meal, and a drink is a great way to do that. And that's actually kind of like solo outing one zero one. That's one of the things one of the first things I suggest to women who want to just experience certain things or practice talking to people or meeting people, just getting comfortable and building confidence with being out on your own is what is a place what is a meal I've wanted to have or a place I've wanted to try? Go to the bar, get a drink, get a meal. That's a low stakes way to go out on your own.
Have a book. Have your phone as backup if you'd like. But, honestly, sitting somewhere for lunchtime at the bar and having a meal, no big deal. It it's like, okay. You need to feed yourself. I'm gonna sit here. And if you're at a place where the bartender's particularly, engaging or helpful, then a lot of times, you can make easy conversation with them. Then before you know it, someone sits down next to you or someone's down the bar and they make a comment or they ask you about your drink or you ask them about their drink. Oh, what are you drinking? What are you having? These are just little conversation starters that you can do when you're just wanting to get out and, experience certain things or build confidence or practice talking to people and meeting people.
But you can take that even bigger by taking some sort of solo trip even if it's not far. So one the one time that I've I have traveled completely by myself, It was not very far from home. At the time, I was living in New York, and I did an Airbnb, in, I think it was New Rochelle, New York, and then I did an Airbnb in Greenwich, Connecticut. And but I went completely by myself, and it was wonderful. I needed that solitude. This was, like, coming out of COVID. At the time, I was in a relationship, and I had two young kids at home, and everybody was losing their minds. So I needed to physically separate in order to regain mine my mind. And so I did that, and that was the most solo I'd ever traveled in my life, you know, where I, like I've traveled on my own, like, on a plane or a bus or a train to get somewhere else to to be with someone or other people.
But I had never, like, gone solo where my destination was for me to be by myself. And that experience, I have yet to do it again, but not because I didn't want to. I just haven't gotten around to it because that experience, really made for me like, it it it I from that experience, I decided that that it was a good idea for me to for women to for mothers in particular to take some sort of solo getaway for them themselves. Doesn't need to be far. It just needs to be physically removed from the household and from your family in order to get peace and solitude in a way that is often very difficult to do when you are amongst your people because everyone needs you all the time. Right? That sort of thing. Or you make yourself need it all the time. Or there's a million and one things that you need to do around the house or want to do around the house or think you need to do right now around the house even if it could wait. Guilty as charged. That being said, when you are physically removed from your environment, you can't do any of that stuff.
So I am a big proponent of a solo getaway in the smallest and largest ways. Like, it is such a mom luxury that shouldn't be a luxury. It should just be a given and a thing that, you know, any of us, any people get to do for some period of time in order to rejuvenate, reflect, regain their sanity, come to terms with various things, have have space and time and energy to think. I highly recommend. Highly, highly recommend. Find an Airbnb not too far from you and go for a couple of nights just on your own. Highly recommend.
So doing something like that is a part of my full life that I have lived and continue to live. But that is how I think of these things. And, like, even in small ways, like, you know, when I was single, and, I would, like, want you know, go to the beach with my boys or do little, travel things with my boys and my mom. It was helpful, like, in those times, like, having young kids, like, trying to get away. I would have my mom with me. We'd go to Cape Cod or we'd go to Rhode Island. One time, me, my oldest, and my mom went to Jamaica. But, like, these are things that are, like, almost like a given for people to do when they're in a relationship.
Right? It's like, oh, let's all go on a family vacation. Let's go on a family trip. Let's all go do together. What I am saying here is as you are dating, as you are single, as you are are going on this journey, create this full life for yourself. Create this full life for you and your kids. Think about and find the ways that you make it happen. Again, I was able to take my kids ahead of my mom, and I'd be like, okay. Like, let's do a little trip. But identify like, okay. Are there friends where we wanna take our kids together? Are there friends, people who I trust where I can go away from my on my own for a little bit?
Are there times where it's, something that where I can take just me and my kids, and it doesn't have to necessarily be, like, a trip? It could be, here's a fun festival that I wanna do. But it's it's being proactive, thinking ahead, looking at what exists out there, researching what may exist that you don't even know exist so that you can put it into that full life bucket, into that plan and that idea that you have for what you want your life to look like. And so this is just me coming in as a reminder, a periodic reminder, that with all the dating stuff we're talking about and all the work you're putting into that, that you should always be aiming to live your full life regardless of who is in your life.
You are in your life. So for that reason alone, you want to be living your full life. So ask yourself what that looks like. What does a full life look like to me? Who's around me? Who am I engaging with? Where is my me time? Where is my group time? Where am I going? Where will I be? What's around me? What type of things do I have in my home, in my space, in my life? What's going on with my kids? How am I feeling in my body, in my mind? I can go on and on and on. But asking yourself these very deliberate questions so that you can intentionally identify. If I let myself dream, if I say what experience do experiences do I want to have? You're able to identify what those things are and start doing a little research and exploring to figure out how you might do those things and incorporate them in your life. So that's all I have to say for today. Living your full life.
Also remember, check the show notes to join my email list, and I will talk to you soon.
Welcome to the Better to Better podcast. Today, we are talking about living a full life. But before we get to that, I would just like to inform you that my email list is now open. So if you check the show notes of this episode, you will see a link to join my email list. With my email list, you will get weekly emails, like, once a week in which you, are informed of dating advice and ongoings and all sorts of things regarding, programs that I open or information that's helpful to know about what's going on around the Coach Tracie camp.
But most importantly, dating support, advice, guidance, etcetera. So I highly recommend that you join my email list. Check the link. And moving forward in the show notes of the episodes, you'll be able to find the link there to register for the email list. Also, just know about my website, which is coachtracy.life, c0achtracie.life, is my website. You can go there to register for the email list. And, also, there is where you get all the info you need regarding the products and services I offer and all that good stuff, which will be very important over the next few months because a lot's gonna be going on, but I'll keep you posted about that as we go. So welcome to today's episode, create a full life. With me, one thing that you know if you have been listening for a bit or will know is that with all of the, advice I would give on dating, on recovering from breakups, on managing stress in your life, I will always be a proponent of you living a full life, of you designing, building, and executing on the life you want to have. And that starts with having an idea of what that life is. Actually thinking, dreaming, wondering, exploring.
What do I want for myself? What do I want for myself and my kids? What do I want for my world now and in the future? Now, in the near future, in the distant future, what do I see for myself? And I always say start with dreaming because it's very easy for us to shut ourselves down from what we want by allowing experience and logic and fear to flood in and say, well, this is why I can't do that, or it will be too hard. And it's not that that the logic or the experience or the fear are not legitimate things or very real or maybe even accurate at times, but it's that they stop you from being able to even create a plan.
So always start with the dream. I would love to travel here or have a house here or have this experience or go to this event or be able to buy this thing. Whatever it is, start with the dream, which is why, you know, vision boards are great. Scripting in a journal, scripting is writing something out as if it's already happened. Visualizations, all the various things that we can do to help ourselves see, feel, and be in an experience that we want to have. So starting with the dream. So what is, like, what is the dream of your full life? What is going on? What is happening for you? Let's say in the next five years or the next year, what does a full life feel like to you?
Because then you start looking into ways that you can get that or mimic that or come close to that. Right? And so I know for me, especially during my dating, journey, it was very important to me that I engaged in the things that I would want to be engaging in when I found my partner. So for me, that meant things like trips to the city and and the city being New York City, taking myself out there, going there to meet meet up with friends, going there just to do, activities that I wanted to do, a Broadway show, certain museum, try certain restaurants, random pop ups and events that would happen there. And me just going and engaging in those things for my enjoyment, but also for, like, practice.
Practice on doing it with somebody who I romantically would bring into my life. One of the biggest examples of this for me was when I celebrated my birthday. Now that would be, like, two years ago. I very intentionally got a hotel for two nights and took myself out to New York City. And the parts of the city that I enjoyed, that I had wanted to visit, stayed in a hotel that I was very interested in staying in, and decided for my birthday, this is what I'm doing for myself. And I am so happy I did that. One, because it was just fun to go and have those experiences. But two, I felt like I very much leaned into an experience that I very much wanted to continue to have in my life, whether single or in a relationship with someone. And so with that, I really got to, like look. It's I've talked about this before on the chase, the the, great date feeling, where, like, having experience of a really good date, like, kind of automatically uplevels your expectations and your standards and what you'll tolerate and won't tolerate and what you strive for when being dated.
Same sort of thing happens with engaging in experiences that you enjoy when you're like, oh, this feels really nice. Like, I am really enjoying this experience or the feeling of this experience or the people who are around me in this experience or the environment or the things that I'm being exposed to due to this experience. That experience could be a really good meal at a restaurant. That experience could be a hotel you stay in. That experience could be somewhere you travel. That experience could be some activity or event that you are at.
That experience could be engaging in some particular thing with certain people, and it makes you feel good. But when you have those moments, it just kind of uplevels your expectations for yourself in your life when it comes to enjoyable activities and things you want to be doing. So I know for me, you know, when I was thinking about how have I leaned into living a full life, some things that are, like, more like, recently, let's say because right now, as I'm recording this, it's the very October 2025. So if we say throughout this summer, this past summer, I like, I have my list here. I, did a whole so, like, starting in May, me and my sister went to the cowboy carter show, in Jersey and made that also into, my dress fitting for my wedding, and I picked my dress.
We ended up going, and seeing death becomes her on Broadway, and and we're surprised to find that Michelle Williams was still, in the show because we we had thought she she had finished, but we're just watching. And then, boom, here's Michelle. Like, it just was like, okay. Just kept giving and giving and giving. We also me and my sister did a little Euro summer. We went to Paris and London, in July, and that was awesome. It was my first time to both those places, her second time. So much fun. But these are things that we're like, we wanna do these things. We want to live these things. Side note, the the Euro, summer, the that trip was supposed to happen back in 2019, but then I got pregnant with my youngest son. So we had to resell our Spice Girl, tour tickets, like, reunion tour tickets.
So that was a long time coming, that trip. But, look, we did it, and I'm so happy we did. Then I went to Michigan with Josh and the boys to see his parents. That was fun. And then, me and a friend went to the city to see a comedian, Jasmine w, who I'd followed on social media for a while. And then I saw she was doing a show, and I was like, hey. You wanna go? Like, yeah. Let's do it. So we just made a little night of that. And then there were a group of friends who we were supposed to go, to a polo match. The weather did not agree with that, so we had to pivot. We ended up going to this, fun place that we hadn't been to before where they have, like, wine on tap. That was wonderful. I loved that. Also, a friend, we were supposed to go see Cabaret in the city, but, Billy Porter had sepsis and, like so had to, like, they had to cancel the show. It was really that's really sad.
And, so we didn't end up going to the show, but we still made it a day in the city and explored and and visited, places, like, from, her past. And it was a great night, a wonderful night. We just leaned into having a good time, enjoying the city, enjoying each other's company, having food, finding, like, street, you know, fairs and and stuff like that, and singing show tunes at the end of the night with wait. Jessica. Oh my gosh. Shin. Oh my gosh. I will put I will put her name in the show notes. The woman it's so bad because she was like, oh my gosh. Is that Jessica?
Not champagne. Chastain. Jessica Chastain. Mhmm. And I was like, I don't know I don't know who that is. And then she looked it up and showed me. I was like, oh, okay. She was in The Help. She was in Interstellar. She was in The Martian. She was in a bunch of stuff. And we ended up sending standing there for, part of the night at a bar singing, show tunes, and it was glorious. But, yeah, like, those are just some examples. What else do we have? Upcoming in November, I'm going to see Iann LaVincent, have a talk in the city with a couple of friends. I, in the past, have done, RBGs, which just stands for rich bitch getaways with my best friend.
We've done two of them so far, one to Vermont, one to New York City. The goal was to do it annually. COVID got in the way, and then life got in the way. We live in different states, right now, but that's always the thing that's on the docket of, like, oh, we should do Napa. You know, we should do, Napa Valley for one of them, or we should do this place or that place. So, like but being very intentional in identifying the things you want to do or experience, the things you want to experience. So start out with that. Because I think, again, going into this idea of dreaming, when we, when we think of it as things I want to experience rather than things I want to do, I do think it creates more of a dreaming element because, sometimes it's things that we're saying, oh, I want to experience this, but I would never do it by myself, or I'd never do it on my own, or I wouldn't be the person to make it happen. Someone else will make it happen for me. And that's fine to want to have someone else make the thing happen for you or to not wanna do it by yourself, such as, let's say, solo travel. But when it comes to actually planning and coming up with the things that you want for your life, it is helpful to think of it as what you want to experience regardless of who does it or doesn't do it because then you you you dream bigger, then you actually identify things you really want to do.
And you're more likely to be able to set up a plan to do them. That solo trip to the city for my birthday for two nights was not something that was ever on my radar in terms of, like, a solo thing. It was on my radar in terms of, sure. I'd you know, I'm always up for spending a night in the city, you know, with friends, maybe for New Year's or for, you know, as a celebration or something like that. But it wasn't until that year that I really considered, like, why not go yourself? And what I did was I made plans, right, that of things that I wanted to do, but also I arranged to have a few friends meet me for dinner. So I had a little bit of, group time with people, but I had a lot of solo time. And it was one of the best trips that I've done, one of the best little, you know, activities that I just went and did for myself.
I did I've done a couple of other more, local solo, ventures for myself, usually around some sort of restaurant that I wanted to visit, and sitting at the bar and chatting with the bartender, having a meal, and a drink is a great way to do that. And that's actually kind of like solo outing one zero one. That's one of the things one of the first things I suggest to women who want to just experience certain things or practice talking to people or meeting people, just getting comfortable and building confidence with being out on your own is what is a place what is a meal I've wanted to have or a place I've wanted to try? Go to the bar, get a drink, get a meal. That's a low stakes way to go out on your own.
Have a book. Have your phone as backup if you'd like. But, honestly, sitting somewhere for lunchtime at the bar and having a meal, no big deal. It it's like, okay. You need to feed yourself. I'm gonna sit here. And if you're at a place where the bartender's particularly, engaging or helpful, then a lot of times, you can make easy conversation with them. Then before you know it, someone sits down next to you or someone's down the bar and they make a comment or they ask you about your drink or you ask them about their drink. Oh, what are you drinking? What are you having? These are just little conversation starters that you can do when you're just wanting to get out and, experience certain things or build confidence or practice talking to people and meeting people.
But you can take that even bigger by taking some sort of solo trip even if it's not far. So one the one time that I've I have traveled completely by myself, It was not very far from home. At the time, I was living in New York, and I did an Airbnb, in, I think it was New Rochelle, New York, and then I did an Airbnb in Greenwich, Connecticut. And but I went completely by myself, and it was wonderful. I needed that solitude. This was, like, coming out of COVID. At the time, I was in a relationship, and I had two young kids at home, and everybody was losing their minds. So I needed to physically separate in order to regain mine my mind. And so I did that, and that was the most solo I'd ever traveled in my life, you know, where I, like I've traveled on my own, like, on a plane or a bus or a train to get somewhere else to to be with someone or other people.
But I had never, like, gone solo where my destination was for me to be by myself. And that experience, I have yet to do it again, but not because I didn't want to. I just haven't gotten around to it because that experience, really made for me like, it it it I from that experience, I decided that that it was a good idea for me to for women to for mothers in particular to take some sort of solo getaway for them themselves. Doesn't need to be far. It just needs to be physically removed from the household and from your family in order to get peace and solitude in a way that is often very difficult to do when you are amongst your people because everyone needs you all the time. Right? That sort of thing. Or you make yourself need it all the time. Or there's a million and one things that you need to do around the house or want to do around the house or think you need to do right now around the house even if it could wait. Guilty as charged. That being said, when you are physically removed from your environment, you can't do any of that stuff.
So I am a big proponent of a solo getaway in the smallest and largest ways. Like, it is such a mom luxury that shouldn't be a luxury. It should just be a given and a thing that, you know, any of us, any people get to do for some period of time in order to rejuvenate, reflect, regain their sanity, come to terms with various things, have have space and time and energy to think. I highly recommend. Highly, highly recommend. Find an Airbnb not too far from you and go for a couple of nights just on your own. Highly recommend.
So doing something like that is a part of my full life that I have lived and continue to live. But that is how I think of these things. And, like, even in small ways, like, you know, when I was single, and, I would, like, want you know, go to the beach with my boys or do little, travel things with my boys and my mom. It was helpful, like, in those times, like, having young kids, like, trying to get away. I would have my mom with me. We'd go to Cape Cod or we'd go to Rhode Island. One time, me, my oldest, and my mom went to Jamaica. But, like, these are things that are, like, almost like a given for people to do when they're in a relationship.
Right? It's like, oh, let's all go on a family vacation. Let's go on a family trip. Let's all go do together. What I am saying here is as you are dating, as you are single, as you are are going on this journey, create this full life for yourself. Create this full life for you and your kids. Think about and find the ways that you make it happen. Again, I was able to take my kids ahead of my mom, and I'd be like, okay. Like, let's do a little trip. But identify like, okay. Are there friends where we wanna take our kids together? Are there friends, people who I trust where I can go away from my on my own for a little bit?
Are there times where it's, something that where I can take just me and my kids, and it doesn't have to necessarily be, like, a trip? It could be, here's a fun festival that I wanna do. But it's it's being proactive, thinking ahead, looking at what exists out there, researching what may exist that you don't even know exist so that you can put it into that full life bucket, into that plan and that idea that you have for what you want your life to look like. And so this is just me coming in as a reminder, a periodic reminder, that with all the dating stuff we're talking about and all the work you're putting into that, that you should always be aiming to live your full life regardless of who is in your life.
You are in your life. So for that reason alone, you want to be living your full life. So ask yourself what that looks like. What does a full life look like to me? Who's around me? Who am I engaging with? Where is my me time? Where is my group time? Where am I going? Where will I be? What's around me? What type of things do I have in my home, in my space, in my life? What's going on with my kids? How am I feeling in my body, in my mind? I can go on and on and on. But asking yourself these very deliberate questions so that you can intentionally identify. If I let myself dream, if I say what experience do experiences do I want to have? You're able to identify what those things are and start doing a little research and exploring to figure out how you might do those things and incorporate them in your life. So that's all I have to say for today. Living your full life.
Also remember, check the show notes to join my email list, and I will talk to you soon.
Welcome and episode focus: Living a full life
Start with the dream: envision your ideal life
Tools for dreaming: vision boards, scripting, visualization
Practice the life you want while dating
A birthday solo NYC getaway that set new standards
How great experiences raise your expectations
Summer highlights: shows, travel, and serendipity
Plan experiences, not just tasks
Solo outing 101: bar seating, small talk, confidence
Solo trips for moms: solitude as renewal
Make solo getaways a norm, not a luxury
Designing a full life with kids and community
Proactive planning: research and schedule your joy
Closing prompts: Define your full life and next steps
