Emotional Support Animals are not legitimate and are impractical? Let's debate!
Differences between service animals and emotional support animals must be understood. Examine the legal frameworks that govern ESA use and the potential for misuse. The conversation takes a humorous turn as we discuss the absurdity of certain emotional support animals, like peacocks and geckos, and the challenges landlords face with tenants who have these animals. Not all landlords are scum?
Look for video versions on https://www.youtube.com/@DeliberatingDogfaceDudes
and other video sites.
The debate touches on the cultural phenomenon of "Danger Haired Disney adults" and their reliance on emotional support animals, questioning whether this trend reflects a deeper societal issue of emotional fragility. We also explore the potential future of emotional support, with the introduction of AI-driven robotic companions designed to provide comfort.
Throughout the episode, we maintain a balance of humor and critical analysis, questioning the boundaries of emotional support and the responsibilities of pet ownership. We conclude with a reflection on the broader implications of emotional support animals in modern society and the potential for future debates on related topics.
Emotional Support Animals: A Necessary Comfort or Cultural Crutch?
From Service Dogs to Robotic Companions: The Evolution of Emotional Support
Disney Adults and Emotional Support Animals: A Symptom of Societal Fragility?
The Legal and Cultural Landscape of Emotional Support Animals
Debating the Future of Emotional Support: Animals, AI, and Society
(00:00:01) Introduction and Service Dogs in Vegas
(00:06:16) Guard Dogs vs. Emotional Support Animals
(00:12:22) Debating Emotional Support Animals
(00:32:02) Legal Aspects of Emotional Support Animals
(00:50:00) Cultural Perspectives on Emotional Support Animals
(01:17:04) Emotional Support Animals in Courtrooms
(01:58:00) Service Dogs vs. Emotional Support Animals
(02:08:01) Final Thoughts and Debate Summary
- Steve
https://serve.podhome.fm/deliberatingdogfacedudes
https://serve.podhome.fm/episodepage/deliberatingdogfacedudes/11
[00:00:02]
Benjamin Balderson:
I just dab, Gordon. It hurt. A little bit of pain in that.
[00:00:08] allen marcus:
I'll get you some emotional support tonight.
[00:00:11] Steve :
Right.
[00:00:13] Benjamin Balderson:
I do need an emotional support animal after that.
[00:00:18] Steve :
Scared you? We're live, by the way. Of course, we are. Yeah.
[00:00:23] Benjamin Balderson:
Of course, we are. Yeah. This is our excitement. Slaps back together so hard it hurts.
[00:00:31] Steve :
You're alright.
[00:00:32] allen marcus:
I have to say, my mind completely changed last year when I had chains wrapped around my arms, and I'm introduced to 2 new terrifying dogs. And I'm walking through Sam's Town in Vegas. Is that what it's called? That big casino that we had a big festival in last year. So I'm just That was that casino with with dogs I had just met, and I'm leaning back with both arms being tugged at. I don't even know what I'm doing, but, man, that was my exposure to service dogs. Were those
[00:01:07] Steve :
are those service dogs? Yeah.
[00:01:10] Benjamin Balderson:
Those dogs are illegal in some places.
[00:01:14] allen marcus:
That's what I've heard. Vicious
[00:01:16] Benjamin Balderson:
dogs.
[00:01:18] allen marcus:
So what was our experience in a hotel in Las Vegas walking around with these do we have 3 of them then Yep. In Vegas? I had 2 of them. You had one of them. Yep. We're just walking down the hallways, getting into elevators, and they had the elevator guy. The elevator guy was checking to see that we were actually from the event, and he was just so welcoming. Was he terrified of those dogs?
[00:01:48] Benjamin Balderson:
No. Nope. It, the whole time in Las Vegas, I believe one person reacted poorly to the dogs. And other than that, across the board, it was more, can we molest your dog? Can we rub your dog? Can we get in your dog's face in every possible way, which he thoroughly enjoys.
[00:02:16] allen marcus:
The dogs love the attention?
[00:02:17] Benjamin Balderson:
Oh, yeah.
[00:02:21] allen marcus:
My other experience with a service animal, I think it was what's the breed that Beethoven was? That really large dog? Saint Bernard? Saint Bernard. Yeah. Yeah. So this Saint Bernard was the size of a small pony and was walking through a cafeteria at a Christian campground. And this dog was very large and was mostly well behaved. But to bring a dog through, like, a mall food court or something where there's a lot of scents and aromas and sensations was was sort of a challenge. I don't know if we'll talk about that more tonight about the places where you would not want to see unexpected animals of any kind.
[00:03:09] Benjamin Balderson:
Well, not not not in, like, a sex party.
[00:03:14] Steve :
Right.
[00:03:15] Benjamin Balderson:
You only wanna see expected ones at the sex party. Unexpected ones, things get wild, not a hand.
[00:03:22] allen marcus:
Right. Yeah. When when tongues are just licking places and you're not expecting that.
[00:03:28] Benjamin Balderson:
Yeah.
[00:03:31] Steve :
Yeah. You think it's gonna be Diddy? Oh, wait. No. It's a fucking Saint Bernard. That would be awkward. That would be awkward, man. Yeah.
[00:03:45] Benjamin Balderson:
And and how do you stop the guy? You know? Like, if he gets too excited, what are you gonna do about it?
[00:03:51] Steve :
Right? Better hit him with that GHB baby oil real quick.
[00:03:59] allen marcus:
Right down the gullet. Some of these service animals are wearing, like, Kevlar vests too, so they're, like, battle hardened ready to go. Hello, Patriot. I see you've got a dog. We've got some products for you. This is my tactical service animal. Equipped with tasers and lasers.
[00:04:19] Steve :
Right. Mostly, I just put 6 packs in there. You know? Like and you know they do. You know they do. Good choice. I had a neighbor that, when I lived in Vegas there for a bit who had 2, German shepherds, and he was obviously like a dog handler. You know? And it's a lot of military around there. Mhmm. So, that that was my assumption. I never really asked. But those dogs looked like they're ready to scale a 30 foot wall and, you know, tackle half a fleet of people. They were they're impressive. Very impressive.
[00:05:01] Benjamin Balderson:
When I was in when I was in Germany in 1995, I got stationed in, Misao, which has a k nine, MP unit in there. And on the weekends when you were fucking off, you could, let them dogs attack you. You could just go in there and then put you in a suit and, you know, they were always looking for volunteers to let, you know, let their dogs attack you. Like, holy smokes. It's pretty funny to get drunk and watch other people do it.
[00:05:40] allen marcus:
Is that one of the requirements to having a k nine unit is to allow the canine to tackle you? Yeah. Down.
[00:05:49] Benjamin Balderson:
Seems that way. Seems like there's a lot of getting attacked and letting the dogs attack other people in that training that Steve's talking about. Like, them them damn fucking, German Shepherds, they'll, like, jump, like, 30 feet through the air, snatch your arm, and somehow twist you around like Reggie White or something.
[00:06:10] allen marcus:
No. Pin you to the ground. Yeah.
[00:06:14] Benjamin Balderson:
Yeah. It's it's it's amazing.
[00:06:17] allen marcus:
That's one of the things I looked at for tonight's debate preparation. What's the difference between a guard dog, like a k nine unit, a drug sniffing dog, these types of security animals.
[00:06:30] Benjamin Balderson:
You can't convince me a drug sniffing dog isn't bullshit. Like, I went to prison. Where the that that's a whole debate subject all on its own. The only in prison, we had a saying. The only thing that those dogs smell are ham sandwiches and kites. A kite was something that were an inmate snitches on another inmate. Mhmm. And then they come by with the drug dog and pretend like the drug dog found it, but they already knew it was there because you never you never see them dogs actually find anything. And supposedly, they could find phones, drugs, cigarettes Mhmm. The hell they could. We'd have that stuff right in our crotch and walk right by him, and they wouldn't care. That dog would sniff right at it and not even react for one second. But Yeah. If you had a ham sandwich in your locker, you betcha.
[00:07:22] allen marcus:
I think that's a different sort of fetish is the, crotch sniffing dogs or the panty sniffing dogs. So we'll try to steer clear of any of the fetishism involved with, this topic. Searching on the Internet is a real minefield for this type of thing. You're trying to get serious information, and it's all tied in with jokes and puns and humor and real serious people looking for real weird encounters. So so Craigslist style.
[00:07:57] Benjamin Balderson:
I assume this is this is what we're debating. Since Steve's not here, we should decide or debate our debate positions to just stick him with whatever is at left over.
[00:08:08] allen marcus:
Again, using that word position and handler in in a different context. Hey, man. I just sat back down and heard all that.
[00:08:17] Steve :
I was hoping so.
[00:08:19] allen marcus:
Just trying to just trying to eat a little bit. So where do you hide your ham sandwich in such a circumstance?
[00:08:27] Steve :
Have you heard Ari Shaffir's bit about pocket ham? Pocket ham? Mhmm. I have not. It's fantastic.
[00:08:37] Benjamin Balderson:
Did I send you that bit that that black guy did about different farm animals and then the pig the way the pig talks? Oh, yeah. Oh, god. I just about pissed myself. I laughed so hard.
[00:08:51] Steve :
No. That was good stuff. That was good stuff.
[00:08:56] allen marcus:
Did dogs smell fear? Is that what they're sniffing out?
[00:09:01] Benjamin Balderson:
100%, they smell fear. Like, if you're scared the dog and the dog's not, now you've made the dog on alert. Like, why are you scared, dude? What's your problem? What kind of shenanigans you pulling?
[00:09:18] allen marcus:
So that kinda seems like an argument against these emotional service animals where, again, maybe this will spoil it for later, but I can just go ahead and say my biggest argument against forcing animals into the role of emotional sport is, have you seen What About Bob? Would you wanna be Bill Murray's emotional sport gopher?
[00:09:43] Benjamin Balderson:
Not even groundhogs wanted to be around Bill Murray. Well, I mean, I've seen Groundhog's Day and Caddyshack. I saw Caddyshack. He was real nasty about gophers and Caddyshack. So I've seen that.
[00:09:56] allen marcus:
So the people the kind of person that demands that they get a letter from their what is it? The PCP, their primary care physician so that they can have their emotional sport animal in their government subsidized housing?
[00:10:19] Benjamin Balderson:
Like, you know, these people are the same people that caused the the opioid epidemic. So them writing off that you are such an emotional weak sop that you need, animal around to like a like a childhood blankie is not really that impressive that you got a doctor's note on that. Like I said, they, they were handing out opioids like they were, freaking Tic Tacs.
[00:10:51] Steve :
Right. And a lot of thought you were talking about the Chinese there for a second. I was like, what's the name?
[00:10:57] allen marcus:
I don't really understand. A few years ago, it might have been Chinese. Now more recently, it may be Haitians, but who's to say? Right. I don't believe every headline I read. In 2019 before everyone stopped traveling because the world shut down for for a few months, there were a lot of headlines talking about the absurdity of emotional support animals, including emotional support geckos. There was a peacock that was trying to board an airplane to travel, I think, from California to Florida for some
[00:11:34] Benjamin Balderson:
some emotional support cock?
[00:11:37] allen marcus:
Yes. Yep. Yep.
[00:11:42] Benjamin Balderson:
Well, they you know, peacocks are mean as fuck too. Yeah. They're Like Right. How is that thing emotionally supporting you? Like, at best, it'll take food from you, but but and show off for you, but they're they're kinda mean all around. The news story said that the airline
[00:11:58] allen marcus:
was alerted ahead of time. The passenger with the peacock had contacted the airline saying, I plan to travel with this peacock. It's my emotional stubborn animal. I have a letter from the doctor, yada yada yada. And they repeatedly said, no. We cannot allow a peacock into our airplane. It cannot be carried on at all. It's just not gonna happen.
[00:12:22] Benjamin Balderson:
Well okay. So, because I have grandma Caesars, I actually have a support animal, but it's not an emotional support animal. And so when you're going through the process of this, there's different levels of, animal. And depending on the different level, they have different things that they're allotted. So because my animal because mine's a seizure dog, literally, there's not a single spot that I can go that that dog isn't allowed to go. One time, I even got arrested, and, the cop ended up getting arrested for it afterwards. That was, interesting. I got illegally arrested, and the jail didn't even know if they could stop my service animal from coming in. They're like, we don't know what we can even do here.
So my service animal is eating in a 5 star restaurant new numerous times. I don't fly on planes, but in order to get on a plane, it has to be the medical condition level, like a physical medical condition, not a mental condition. The only thing that those, emotional support letters are supposed to be good for is having, an animal in your home. They can't stop you from having the animal in your home and living with you at that point, so it's a real, plague on, landlords. Mhmm. But, it it doesn't really give you a lot of other rights. You can't just go willy nilly taking the dog into a business because it's your emotional support animal. Really, it it's only good for apartments for the most part or or a house if you're renting or whatever.
[00:14:28] allen marcus:
That's a lot of the anecdote anecdotes I was finding in terms of emotional sport animals being kind of a new thing. And these letters are it's kinda like when you go to a doctor and you're like, doctor, I'm not I can't sleep. I I don't have an appetite. Is there anything that you could is there anything that you could help me with that isn't a pharmaceutical medicine and that doctor might be, you know, there's some natural remedies, some herbs as we might call them, you know, and I could just write you this letter, and you could take it to a CBD shop. And they should be What about a peacock? Could I get a peacock? Could I get a peacock to help me out?
Right. Yeah. Could I get a confidence boosting animal, like, a real flashy animal that I could take to a dog park to get really noticed.
[00:15:25] Steve :
If your weed card doctor hooks you up with an emotional support peacock, you also need to know where your weed card doctor gets his weed.
[00:15:36] Benjamin Balderson:
Yes. Yes.
[00:15:40] allen marcus:
No one was like,
[00:15:41] Benjamin Balderson:
Jay, big deal. That would be the most badass if I went to, like, fucking different speaking events Mhmm. With a peacock as an elephant. Yeah. Mhmm. Yeah. And then I could maybe train Henry. Anybody that got got smarter slick, fucking Henry just runs over and attacks him.
[00:16:03] allen marcus:
You know, my guns are around.
[00:16:06] Benjamin Balderson:
I was gonna take Ostarra with me to Renaissance Festivals. Oh, yeah. Mhmm.
[00:16:14] allen marcus:
We'll have to talk about the legitimacy of man made unicorns.
[00:16:21] Steve :
Are there emotional support goats? Probably not.
[00:16:24] allen marcus:
Not yet. There aren't. Probably not.
[00:16:27] Benjamin Balderson:
They're less of an asshole than a peacock.
[00:16:30] Steve :
That's fair.
[00:16:33] allen marcus:
I do want an emotional support unicorn
[00:16:37] Benjamin Balderson:
to attend to Well, I think there's an all take in an emotional support unicorn, but that bastard Tom Cruise fucking he did not save the last unicorn. You know? Have, my emotional support, David Bowie, with me. It's the
[00:16:48] allen marcus:
sport David Bowie with me. 30th anniversary ish. Jennifer Connelly is there too, just in case. There's a lot of movies that people can fall asleep to. Apparently, that's the whole thing. So you could have emotional support movies like your favorite movie. You just put it on when you're feeling sad and helps you fall asleep and relax. Legend is probably one of them for me.
[00:17:17] Steve :
Let's see. You could have, I mean, at that point, you know, you you could have, like, emotional support, rare first edition books that you demand to be given to you because, you know, that's that's what homes you emotionally. That's what provides support. Yeah.
[00:17:42] allen marcus:
Keep keep it on your bed stand at night?
[00:17:45] Steve :
My emotional support gun collection.
[00:17:49] allen marcus:
I'm still alive because there's books I wanna finish reading. Mhmm. It makes you it makes you feel safer. Mhmm. Makes life worth living. I still got things to do, having a goal. So maybe these goals are emotions for animals.
[00:18:05] Benjamin Balderson:
So all underwear have, like, the little cuppies in the around the balls Mhmm. So they don't stick to the inside of your thighs when it's hot. I I you know, because that's that's a very emotionally traumatizing thing when you when you're, like, sitting in in public and now your nuts are stuck to your thighs because it because only a couple underwear company have figured out to put a little flap of cloth around there to cradle your balls. And and I just feel like there should be something done about
[00:18:37] Steve :
that. Like, you should have your balls cradled more or there should be more underwear?
[00:18:43] Benjamin Balderson:
No. Definitely more cradling of the balls.
[00:18:45] Steve :
Right. Okay. Okay.
[00:18:49] Benjamin Balderson:
Yeah.
[00:18:50] allen marcus:
Is that another labyrinth reference? I got my emotional support David Bowie over their eye. Yeah.
[00:18:57] Benjamin Balderson:
I I figured it went with it it went with the labyrinth reference. Unfortunately, my oldest daughter is at that perfect age. That labyrinth was one of the movies that came out that I had to watch 839,000 times in, like, a 6 month period. Mhmm. And I would stab David Bowie right in his face. Right? You you sing a song about the babe one more time, motherfucker. I have to hear that the babe song one more time. I will kick you right in your ding ding. You know, that's that's alright.
[00:19:29] allen marcus:
And Labyrinth is a perfect film. There aren't very many. Labyrinth is one of them. One flaw was labyrinth, and I will admit this. It's that scene with the, the fire head guys where they're taking their heads off, and they're all getting flamed and deadheading? That that I could do without. That one is just I've it's terrifying.
[00:19:50] Benjamin Balderson:
Oh, you found it.
[00:19:53] Steve :
That's fair. That's fair.
[00:19:55] allen marcus:
I put dishes in the kitchen.
[00:19:58] Benjamin Balderson:
Oh, you're amazing.
[00:20:00] allen marcus:
Thank you, Christy.
[00:20:01] Steve :
His wife's not home.
[00:20:06] allen marcus:
There was an argument that emotional support animals are in many ways for some people, a cope for not having a husband or a wife or a significant other. I think that's a legitimate argument for or against animals is that they were I would almost state that they're,
[00:20:24] Benjamin Balderson:
cope for not having children and such. Mhmm. Because the more people that I see that have those don't have kids or responsibilities, and they're like children themselves, and they baby those animals to a degree that I've never seen. Like, everybody I know that has little dogs, those little dogs shit all up in their house and piss all over the place and like Yeah. You know? And they're just like, oh, it's it's cute. It's cute. Like, what the hell?
[00:20:57] allen marcus:
Indeed. And that's kind of one of the arguments against giving emotional sport animals validation just kinda willy nilly is that some of these people, if they are so emotionally stunted and agoraphobic and in no condition to take care of themselves, then it's not gonna turn into a a Turner and Hooch situation where having a a mastiff in your house is gonna somehow get you out of the house and walking around and training and walking the dog and exposure to the world and just improving on all aspects of your life. If you're so far gone that you really can't even leave your house to see a doctor about getting an emotional support animal letter, then it's gonna be more of an emotional drain on the animal itself. So it might not be fair to the animal to be such an emotional burden.
[00:21:57] Steve :
I mean, that yeah. I I don't I don't know if there's any way to make a, like, broad brush statement that that is necessarily even the case, and especially if you're trying to replace spouse as opposed to children. I do agree that there's way too many people that run around and call their pets their fur babies, and they're just rancid little pork dogs. Like, not, you know, not even the size of a real dog. Like, the the healers are small. They're still real dogs. But,
[00:22:38] Benjamin Balderson:
it I suck at this.
[00:22:40] Steve :
I I do think I do think that it can go the other way. I mean, anecdotally, I've seen men whose wives died, who got dogs, who lived another 40 years. Ben, then when, you know, outlived, like, a couple of the dogs. But the dog went everywhere with the old dudes. You know, the dog would fucking, like, allowed in the coffee shops and shit like that in town because that dude went for fucking coffee to that one spot every year for fucking, you know, the his entire time there was a coffee shop in that town. And fucking, yeah, they're definitely keeping them alive for sure.
And, like, active and, you know, relatively, you know, smiling about it. Sure. This is all And then also engaging with people every day, which is the one thing that, like, a lot of old people don't get to do a lot is engage with a variety of different people and, you know, several close friends on a regular basis.
[00:23:54] allen marcus:
And that's my number one argument. If I were to take the position of being in favor of the expansion of emotional sport animals in American culture, and it does seem to be an American culture saying, I don't know that other countries are all like, hey, man. Emotional sport animals are the are the key role to, you know, the world's problems of just, suffering and human existence and nihilism and existentialism. Just get a dog. Just get a cat.
[00:24:24] Steve :
Yeah. But that's the same. I mean, people say that American innovation is is extinct, but here we are discussing some good old fashioned American ingenuity right now.
[00:24:36] allen marcus:
Well I mean Yes.
[00:24:38] Benjamin Balderson:
I mean, the whole emotional support thing, I think, is kind of a, you know, a nonsense thing. But on the same token, myself, obviously, I live out in the freaking woods with a shit ton of animals. For me, I don't understand the world's thing where they don't have animals around. That's weird to me. So, you know, I am I am I I would be for a culture where animals were more openly accepted. Like, I I could care less if a guy walks in with a fucking dog as long as the dog's well behaved. I don't care. Or a cat or a peacock or a turtle or whatever they wanna hang out with. I don't care. A 7 year old runner. You clean up after it, and you yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Animals are more well behaved than kids most of the time.
Mhmm. But, yeah, the the you clean up after your animal and make sure it behaves right, and I don't really see a problem other than that myself. I mean, you you ever, read about, Tyke, Tycho Brahe? The, he was a fairly famous, astrologer. He had a pet moose. He used to take the bar with him and get drunk. And the damn moose got too drunk one time and fell down some stairs and killed itself. Like, he had a damn drinking moose he hung out with. Oh. Like, I don't know what you know? I that sounds just cool to me.
[00:26:09] allen marcus:
Dick you killed your fucking Was Tycho Brahe in a urban area? Was he on a on a university campus where it was real close knit, community where there wasn't a whole lot of space for people to run around. We get these urban environments
[00:26:28] Benjamin Balderson:
where Listen. If you've ever seen freaking the Hobbit series and the battle of the 5 armies and you see what the fucking elf king does when he comes rolling in with the big old moose. Uh-huh. How what you want me to go to a college campus and have to go deal with them and not have a moose? I haven't made it past the,
[00:26:49] allen marcus:
the Hobbit series part of the movie where they're having 2nd and 3rd and 4th breakfast, but they're singing about it. That was Lord of the Rings. No. That was the Hobbit film, the first Hobbit film, and they had some breakfast scene, and they're all singing and dancing about all the food they're eating. And that just went on for an hour or 2 or 3, and I was like, yeah. This is this is Peter Jackson's
[00:27:12] Benjamin Balderson:
or the rings, Hobbit. Now you gotta watch the 5 armies, and you gotta watch him with the moose. And you gotta understand that if I was confronted by an army of college children, I would
[00:27:22] Steve :
I would expect to have a moose. Yeah. It would be nice definitely nice to have battle moose. It would. Yeah. You're not wrong.
[00:27:33] allen marcus:
Yeah. The the battle moose in Minneapolis?
[00:27:35] Steve :
Right.
[00:27:36] Benjamin Balderson:
And if he gets drunk with you, how do you beat that?
[00:27:41] Steve :
You always got a buddy. Right?
[00:27:45] Benjamin Balderson:
That's what I'm saying.
[00:27:48] allen marcus:
Concrete jungle.
[00:27:51] Steve :
Dude.
[00:27:53] allen marcus:
And that was sort of the conversation I started in the little private chat to say, hey. Let's talk about animals. Let's talk about emotional and sport animals and the limitations of having said animals in modern day 15 minute city urban setting. Where do they fit into, like, agenda 2030?
[00:28:15] Steve :
Well, there's I've, you know, been a consistent push for to make sure that every pet is spayed or neutered. They don't you know, they're already trying to drastically reduce, the amount of the I mean, even, like, the made to order puppy mill places are, you know, running leaner. So there's that. There's it's getting harder and harder and harder to rent a place unless you have that doctor's letter. You know, if you if you have a if you already have a pet, you know, it's significantly harder to get anywhere at least right now, with 1, you know, without, again, without the letter. Right.
I had the fake papers saying Gomez was an Argentinian dogo. Do you hear that, Tier?
[00:29:19] Benjamin Balderson:
You hear that meat head? You're a dogo. You're a dogo, you big meathead. Dogo daddy. And is there some discrimination
[00:29:27] allen marcus:
against dog breeds in your is it county? Is it
[00:29:31] Steve :
Oh, the this was to get into the apartment complex in Vegas. I haven't had to worry about it since. Okay. But but, yeah, I mean, I've been trying I've been looking at a couple of different spots, because my girl's place is super tiny. And, yeah, dude. It's not easy finding anywhere that's, like, pet friendly period
[00:29:54] allen marcus:
around there. If we were if we were having a proper heated debate, we'd probably wanna find a landlord who's just had properties destroyed by Oh, for sure. Animals who weren't who weren't properly looked after, who weren't given a big yard to run around, who weren't brought for walk every morning, this type of thing. It's not. And that is where we can get into the the meat of the matter here. And I do have a little quiz for you guys. Under the Fair Housing Act, the FHA in the United States, individuals with disabilities are allowed to have emotional sport animals, ESAs, in their housing even in properties that have a no pets policy.
As long as they provide appropriate documentation, such as a letter from a licensed health care provider. However, there are 2 primary exceptions where a landlord may refuse to accommodate an emotional support animal. What are those two exceptions?
[00:30:56] Steve :
I would imagine if it's already a currently banned dog breed.
[00:31:04] Benjamin Balderson:
Maybe HUD home? Hub HUD housing?
[00:31:10] Steve :
I don't know.
[00:31:11] allen marcus:
Those are your final answers? Do you need to phone a friend? This friend doesn't have a clue. If you are the weakest chain in the link, your dog will get through the gate.
[00:31:25] Benjamin Balderson:
The answers are I don't know. I I don't know enough about emotional support animals because it's different rules that I have to follow.
[00:31:34] allen marcus:
Right. So under the Fair Housing Act, and we'll have to verify this with a lawyer for sure. But the answer I got was an undue financial burden. So if accommodating the emotional support animal would impose an undue financial burden on the housing provider, they may be able to refuse a request. This could apply in situation where the animal causes significant damage to property or requires extensive modifications that would be financial financially prohibitive for the landlords. So if the landlord can state that having to
[00:32:08] Benjamin Balderson:
modify the property in some way for the landlord you tried to come in with an emotional support giraffe,
[00:32:15] allen marcus:
like, they're like, no. We can't fucking put arched roofs up to support It it may be like that or it may just be that the landlord doesn't wanna add doggy doors or something. It might be Yeah. Or
[00:32:28] Steve :
doggy doors. Yeah. Like, a fence all the way around. Mhmm. Might just have a might just have a back fence. You know? Yep. That's not gonna fly. If there was a pool that got grandfathered in that didn't have a separate fence or, you know, barrier around it, that would have to come in. Mhmm. Yeah. I mean, there's a bunch of ways that it could What if you had an emotional support dolphin?
[00:32:56] Benjamin Balderson:
You know, Jana was trying to get you to have an emotional support cock. Somebody did have an emotional support cock, and they tried to get onto a plane with it. Mhmm. That probably didn't go well. No.
[00:33:06] allen marcus:
It was a stunt. It was a publicity stunt.
[00:33:11] Steve :
And It was orchestrated by Jana.
[00:33:13] allen marcus:
You know, these social media accounts of animals, famous animals, have gotten out of control. That was kind of a trend, maybe 2017, 2018. Yeah. But now I think it's it's cooled down a lot. You know, Instagram has changed its policies. Facebook Meta kinda owns that thing. They're instituting new policies for teenagers to say that this is a teenager on account. Maybe a little bit too late. But as soon as that happens, it's completely jumped the shark. No one under the age of cool wants to be on these social media platforms anymore because their parents and grandparents are on them, that type of thing. I do have the answer to the number two reason that a landlord could say no. No. I have What was the number 1?
Undue financial burden? Undue financial burden on the landlord and the housing provider. And the I'm not a patient. The other reason is a direct threat to health or safety. So the presence of the emotional sport animal
[00:34:15] Benjamin Balderson:
poses a direct threat to the health or safety of others. The landlord may refuse to allow the animal. Like, half of what was said about one seemed like it was, like, almost like something you could only determine in a post situation, not pre. Like, I you know, how do you know that the animal's gonna tear the place up or whatever? Like, how would you know any of that? Well And how would you know if the animal's gonna be attackful or something and
[00:34:43] allen marcus:
pose a danger to the person? How do you know? Well, you set up a doggy date. It's like my dogs meet your dogs. We're gonna go to the dog park. We're gonna walk around. The landlord's gonna pet and feed the animal and get to know the animal and develop a relationship. And if it doesn't work out, then the landlord can say, no. I just don't think this is gonna work out. So after presenting the letter from the primary care physician, and I have the code that the billable health insurance code for that. If you guys want that, I have that handy. If the landlord meets with you and the animal, because you have to present the animals that are gonna stay. If it's more than 1, well, then the landlord could probably say no.
That's too many animals. You can have one animal registered to stay with you.
[00:35:37] Benjamin Balderson:
Or what if your what if your significant other also has a support animal?
[00:35:41] allen marcus:
Well, then it's probably one animal per person, but the landlord can always refuse and say no. If you as the emotional support animal owner say, I wanna challenge this, then you'd probably have to lawyer up or something to that effect. But just because someone has an emotional sport, animal, letter from a primary care physician or a therapist, the landlord can still refuse, and then you have to go and and work that out legally. I don't know how you do that.
[00:36:23] Steve :
So no emotional support alligators?
[00:36:29] allen marcus:
Probably probably not. Oh. Because if if they're small and they fit into an aquarium, they're gonna grow large, and then they're gonna get flushed down a toilet at some point, and then they're gonna show up in the sewers.
[00:36:48] Benjamin Balderson:
How how if it got that big, how were you flushing it down the toilet? Right. That's a fair question. Well, you flush it before it gets larger than
[00:36:56] allen marcus:
the largest stool you've ever dropped. That's really that's really the other concern a landlord might have is saying, you know, that dog looks large. Looks like it eats a lot and leaves a lot behind. And what is your policy or rather what is your technique of picking this stuff up?
[00:37:22] Steve :
The, like, semester I was in college, I knew these dudes that lived in the next dorm over, and they had an alligator in their little, like, teeny tiny ass fucking dorm room, and they wound up getting busted. I I don't see how they couldn't have. You know? The thing stunk. Yeah. Donk.
[00:37:47] Benjamin Balderson:
That room indoor turtle?
[00:37:49] Steve :
That room was funky.
[00:37:52] Benjamin Balderson:
Mhmm. Was it like a turtle?
[00:37:54] Steve :
It was I mean, it was a motherfucking alligator, Ben. And once it got to, like, 3 and a half feet,
[00:38:01] Benjamin Balderson:
which mean the smell. Was the smell like people that have because I've because every bite I've ever known that you wanna If you wanna turtle If you wanna that room, you're like, what the fuck? If you wanna multiply that by, like, several times and add a meat diet
[00:38:16] Steve :
to it.
[00:38:18] Benjamin Balderson:
The meat diet was the real cherry on top with that. That meat diet really makes things like you can shit out vegetable stuff, and it's only so bad and goes away. Mhmm. Meat diet, like, that's gonna that's that's some funk. It'll anger.
[00:38:36] Steve :
Is it a anger? Anger longer. Mhmm. Any of the OP and Anthony people listening right now. But, yeah, dude. So when they they caught the guys, it got turned over to the university system.
[00:38:56] allen marcus:
Did it become a science
[00:38:59] Steve :
specimen for I'm sure I'm sure it did. I'm sure it did. I'm sure they get let it get a little bit bigger and then fucking yep.
[00:39:08] allen marcus:
So a lot of people wanted to make the claim that there were studies that proved the benefits of having animal animals for therapy in regards to emotional disturbances, distress, trauma, grief, all the categories of conditions that would be emotional and mental and these types of things. So to say that animals alleviate some of that concern is anecdotal. But in terms of having studies, actual reproducible scientific studies published in psychiatric and medical journals, there aren't very many for a number of reasons, including the fact that there's too many different animals. There's too many different people, too many different conditions, and there's no money involved because Pfizer doesn't want you to have a dog. They want you to take the pills forever.
[00:40:07] Benjamin Balderson:
I mean, I can't deny that an animal makes you feel better. That's just a fact. Mhmm. But I do concern that why is everybody, so emotionally traumatized? Like, is this you know, if this is just you playing a hot game to get a dog into your apartment, cool. But if you're all this traumatized, like, you maybe shouldn't be putting it on an animal. I don't know.
[00:40:35] allen marcus:
Yeah. Yep. And to have that, you know, crutch, and this is sort of where we get into the ableist language and people are gonna attack from either side to say, you know, you're getting unemotional about this. You're not empathetic to say that it's unfair to certain animals to have to be roommates for some of these people who it's this is where we have to be judgmental, and we have to say, I've been to Magic the Gathering tournaments. I've been to certain situations where, you know, Super Smash Brothers is the priority. Showering is not this type of thing. Anime conventions. There are certain people who just haven't taken the social cues to recognize that, you know, this may be the one time a year you put on a costume and you go out to a party and you walk through a hotel and you're just having lots of fun due to your inability to recognize your own aroma, people need to say, hey. You know what?
You're just not living like a human being. You're living more like a beast of burden here. And someone needs to tell you, you know, you're going through a lot of internal struggles, this sort of exposure therapy to get you out. It's it's great. You're making friends. You're communicating with people. But you know what? At some point, you have to just realize that this is not this is not a safe space for you. The world at large is not going to hold your hand along the way and sort of accommodate you. So there's this idea that some handicaps, some disabilities are visible and others are invisible within the realm of the invisible handicaps, these types of things where people might self diagnose or just not feel like they are properly prepared to put on a clean pair of underwear, tie their shoes, and walk outside their door to get their mail or to pay a bill or a basic adult skill.
This is a long winded way to say that if someone is to get an emotional support animal, the question the follow-up question would be, what is your plan? What is your goal? And how long will it take for you to overcome whatever it is, challenge or adversity you're facing to then realistically get back in the game? And if it this is a college setting, an academic setting where, you know, you take a semester off because things are just not going well, but eventually you gotta get back into the game, you gotta attend classes, you have to graduate, The college isn't gonna house you forever. This type of thing.
The world is not a college. The world does not have academic advisors and support staff. At some point, if in America, every adult or over 50% of adults require emotional support animals, they require certain medications to put them to sleep and to wake them up at night. Is it even financially an option to continue
[00:43:53] Benjamin Balderson:
to allow Do we have a statistic on the number of adults that have support animals?
[00:44:00] allen marcus:
It's it's not a category that has real numbers yet. Service dogs
[00:44:08] Benjamin Balderson:
are probably registered. There's probably a database for that real numbers for that. Yeah. No. There's there's absolutely a database for service dogs. Right. It's, digital because Mhmm. I get a thing every month that re ups my, digital thing that, keeps track of my dogs and everything.
[00:44:32] allen marcus:
Yep. And there are many websites that will claim to assist a person in getting a letter or a registry or something for emotional support animal. The problem with that is it's not a legal document. So one of the websites I looked at, and I'll have to bring it up here, find it again, it basically says in its fine print that it it's not it doesn't matter. It's not a real thing. Mhmm. They have to say that in fine print because it's an it's a dotorg website. But on the bottom, it says what does it say? Looking for it here. Like, esaregistration.org.
And then it says there that ESA owners let's see. Registration ESA registration of America is not a government agency and is not affiliated with or endorsed by HUD, the Department of Transportation, or any other governmental agency, registration of an emotional sport animal with ESA registration of America does not give you any additional legal rights, but esaregistration.org will sell you merchandise and maybe a fancy looking certificate to hang on your wall. Oh, that's nice. But just like a leather bound Trump bible that you put your hand on and you swear allegiance to the flag of America, you know, it's just a decorative thing. Mhmm. Yeah. It's got no real actual authority. Right. But if you walk around with an official looking letterhead, something that looks like it was printed like a college certificate or some sort of fancy looking thick hemp paper with some real ink, nice colors on it, you walk around with that. You show that to TSA. You show that to everybody when you have a weird animal walking around with you. They might look at that and they might say, you know what? I'm not even gonna question it. Just let the guy go by. But at some point, you're gonna get challenged.
[00:46:42] Steve :
Yeah. Yeah. Usually by the, lady at the counter, right before you board a plane. Mhmm.
[00:46:57] Benjamin Balderson:
Where did you guys keep going with that porcupine?
[00:47:00] Steve :
Right. Right, sir. Sir.
[00:47:03] allen marcus:
Are you referring to literal drug drug mules at border crossings? She's got a latex gloves on, and she's like, you know what? I have to check your orifices. I'm not checking a donkey's orifice today. No entry. Refused. Not stamping your passport today.
[00:47:24] Steve :
That's looking checking is her night job. Right.
[00:47:29] Benjamin Balderson:
3 o'clock in the afternoon. That's why you have to wait for a hurricane to get them donkeys smuggled in.
[00:47:36] allen marcus:
Yes. Yes. The I forty went out. I was on the I forty, and then it turns out the best way to smuggle in drinking water to the Carolinas is pack animals.
[00:47:52] Steve :
Mhmm. I saw that video. Those guys are alright.
[00:47:58] Benjamin Balderson:
Yeah. It's very contrary to the people that say our things couldn't have been built with horse and buggy and the new technology can't do it then yada yada. And then when everything goes to crap, you see a bunch of guys with donkeys doing the job like, That's interesting.
[00:48:19] Steve :
Well and helicopters, but, yes, also donkeys. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Helicopters are handy.
[00:48:26] allen marcus:
Saw videos of the helicopters hovering over and just causing disturbances of of the donated goods and just really stirring things up?
[00:48:38] Benjamin Balderson:
You know what? That's what Blackhawk helicopter pilots do. Mhmm. I was in the army for, 6 years. And, like, anybody that's been in the military, like, you set up your tents. Those dickheads just come and knock them all down for no apparent reason. Like and they think it's funny, and you can't really say anything to them about it. They're all everybody that flies those things is a freaking officer, and you can't say anything. And they just do that just for the fun of it. So I don't really know that that was a special thing that they did for them. They do that to everybody.
[00:49:13] allen marcus:
They're dickheads. I had a pretty high rank in Call of Duty Modern Warfare, so I'm pretty established in modern warfare tactics. Actually, I have a headset, and I talk to my friends. We we kill the other team dead. I I don't. I don't do that. It's like the opposite of emotional sport. Animals are, like, 13 year olds on Xbox Live.
[00:49:38] Steve :
Lots of hand bombs.
[00:49:40] allen marcus:
Mhmm. So that would be my recommendation is, you know, get your kid a headset, an Xbox Live subscription, and just get them to play some of these shooter games, and they will be emotionally stirred up and exposed to all sorts of worldliness. And they will have to man up real quick.
[00:50:00] Benjamin Balderson:
After that, they can watch faces of death. Oh,
[00:50:07] Steve :
good lord, man. That was hectic back in the day.
[00:50:12] Benjamin Balderson:
Dude, these kids wanna talk about traumatized. You didn't watch faces of death when you were 17 by some friend that was a douchebag that brought it over. It's like, you gotta see this. I'm emotionally fucked up for the rest of my life after watching this. Now you will be too.
[00:50:28] Steve :
Oh, dude. Yeah. We were like, I don't know, 12, 13, something like that. Maybe 13, 14. The when we that shit was playing at the fucking party that we weren't supposed to be at in the first place. Yeah. But, yeah, I remember just being like, what the fuck? Not being able to and then I had a friend whose older brother brought, the rest of them home from the nonblockbuster video store. It was the local video store.
[00:51:05] Benjamin Balderson:
The one that had the porn backroom.
[00:51:07] Steve :
I don't know if they had a porn backroom or not. Like, they shut down before I got old enough to, like, really want to go look for any kind of porn room.
[00:51:15] allen marcus:
And that's maybe a a separate debate, but I will say that I think it was the movie gremlins or something when they put an animal in a microwave. It's not even a real animal. It's a gremlin. You put it in the microwave. People are Mhmm. A little upset that this was a parental guidance suggested film, the PG rated movie. I think at that point, maybe that was the point. They did microwave 1. It exploded in the microwave. It was it was all green. It was gross. Was that the tipping point, though, for for culture to be a little bit more protected?
[00:51:47] Steve :
The the never ending story was like a PG rated movie. That shit was traumatizing as hell.
[00:51:53] allen marcus:
Well, to be exposed to an emotional situation that was about death and the loss of an animal leads to another point that I have in my document about maybe a concern we'd have. If someone is emotionally stunted, they get emotional service animal, and that emotional service animal is not taken care of and then deceased, now you wake up to a dead dog in your bed, is that going to be the end
[00:52:25] Steve :
the end of your therapy? It's just over? You're gone? No. Those people probably go right out and get another dog right off the bat.
[00:52:34] Benjamin Balderson:
It it it's not like the egg from high school. They'll just get another egg and put a dot on it. It's like that. Yeah. Thought it was a a sack of
[00:52:43] allen marcus:
flour. A heavy sack of flour. You didn't have to carry it on like an actual baby. An egg is just a little bit too small.
[00:52:52] Benjamin Balderson:
You guys had to do a sack of flour?
[00:52:55] allen marcus:
Well, yeah. It's more like baby shaped. Okay. So you'd have to put on your back or you you put it on your chest. Right? You have to try to breastfeed the the bag of flour.
[00:53:10] Benjamin Balderson:
You guys really went all out with it, man. They just wanted us not to break the egg for a week. Yeah.
[00:53:16] allen marcus:
Right. So so men have to experience what it's like to be a woman, and then you have the the thing you put on with the breast, and then you have the little baby bag, and then you put the flour, and then then you gotta pretend to breastfeed in public to be exposed to that shame. Yeah. And then pretend to breastfeed in public to be exposed to that shame.
[00:53:30] Steve :
You didn't have to do that? I did not go to that school, man, and I did not.
[00:53:35] allen marcus:
Well, maybe it didn't catch on.
[00:53:38] Benjamin Balderson:
Holy smokes, man. You know what? I knew that there was way too many Kamala Harris signs in Minnesota.
[00:53:45] allen marcus:
No. I think that was, like, governor Tim Waltz thing where he was just wanting everyone to experience. What was this thing about football?
[00:53:56] Steve :
He got to hang out with young boys. Yeah. Something about playing football together.
[00:54:02] Benjamin Balderson:
Did you guys see yet the thing coming out where they're, apparently, they're about to nail Tim Waltz with a Mhmm. A bunch of Chomo, a bunch of child molester freaking
[00:54:14] Steve :
I I also saw some really I also saw some really convincing debunks of that coming from the right, not not even coming from the left. I'd he looks like, short eyes.
[00:54:30] allen marcus:
He does. Some poo poo eyes? Yeah. Got all that extra white space around his eyes. It's like, don't shoot till you see the whites of his eyes, then you see Tim Waltz showing up with crazy eyes.
[00:54:43] Steve :
Yeah. I mean, he looks yeah. He he looks like he's got those peto eyes for sure. I mean, he acts like a freaking clown.
[00:54:50] Benjamin Balderson:
Well, if the supposedly, the one guy that's saying it's saying that he has definitive, Mhmm. You know, things that he can say that if you had not seen Tim Waltz's genital area, I'm presuming, you would not know about. And so if that makes you that's pretty, you know, if it's not, then it's just BS. But if it's true,
[00:55:18] Steve :
No. Yeah. Yeah. There there's only a couple of weeks left till the election. Thank blonde haired, blue eyed, perfect baby Jebus. Can't wait till this freaking nonsense is over.
[00:55:34] Benjamin Balderson:
Dude, this is this has been the growth one of the grossest things at elections. Like, I'm just I I don't anybody that isn't suffering from apathy at this point, I don't understand where you are.
[00:55:54] Steve :
Dude, it yeah. And it's not it's not even apathy. I just I I want people to shut up.
[00:56:01] allen marcus:
We're talking about something else. I need a political support animal to help me get into lying to receive my ballot on election day? Because I'm just just terrified. I don't make the wrong choice. And if I choose the wrong president
[00:56:18] Steve :
So that's, that's an election day game. Because you know everybody who brings their emotional support animal to the polling station is a Harris voter. So that's one way we can be
[00:56:33] Benjamin Balderson:
Dude, I except for if you showed up with, like, an election day Wolverine and then accidentally lost control, that'd be great. That would be great.
[00:56:47] Steve :
Right? That you just shook the box the whole way there. Fucking didn't even get out. Just chucked it right into the freaking emotional support dog crowd. Oh my
[00:57:05] Benjamin Balderson:
god. She just watched it just fucking just go psycho like a damn berserker just tearing dogs up left and right.
[00:57:14] Steve :
Oh, man. That's brutal.
[00:57:18] allen marcus:
Some of the lines in Saint Paul districts to vote were crazy long, and these people have to just wait in line just to get into some church and their little district just to go living in Saint Paul. Right. They get what they deserve.
[00:57:39] Benjamin Balderson:
Yeah. Nobody with sense lives in Saint Paul.
[00:57:43] allen marcus:
You know, I'm thinking we could just take over the state fairgrounds, just start living there, turn into an autonomous zone, turn into a ranch, you know, bringing all the horses, all the ponies, all the all the pack animals. And a moose for Ben. Don't forget that. Well, we do have Yeah. Coffee, so we'll have to have some cariboos with coffee cantinas.
[00:58:08] Benjamin Balderson:
Right. Remember that gorilla at the Minnesota Zoo that would break out and go beat people up? The big purple one? Yeah. K I think his name was Casey. We should invite him.
[00:58:18] allen marcus:
Oh, Casey already lives there.
[00:58:21] Benjamin Balderson:
Yeah. We should we should we should go help him break out again.
[00:58:26] allen marcus:
That would that would be great except that I don't know that the organizers of the Minnesota State Fair really respect animals because there were cows, I think, that were gonna be milked, but then they had to have that situation squashed. And they brought in, you know, replacement cows that were not real cows to give milk and medications. Yeah. They were cow it was, what, a cow pox or cow flu or something Oh, wow. Concerned about. Yeah. The the treatment of animals in urban areas is a real big concern. There's just not enough space.
[00:59:06] Benjamin Balderson:
Well, it's that you know, I'm a I'm even a vegetarian. Mhmm. And those PETA people are fucking crazy. They have never been to a farm. They have no idea what things are or how they operate. Like, some of the pictures you see them post, and they're like, oh my god. Look at this. You're like, look at what? If they don't even know what the hell they're talking about. Like, I remember I saw one where they had a machine where they supposedly were rape inseminating sheep. And I'm like, nobody in the world does that. You don't even get enough money from a slaughter lamb to to justify the kind of money that that would take when you can just go buy a buck and stick it out in the field, and he'll take care of the whole thing for you. You ain't even gotta worry about it. Like, there was something scientific going on there. Like, that had nothing to do with a normal farm. It it's just absolutely ridiculous.
[01:00:02] Steve :
Yeah. No. They're crazy. They they are. Stone cold cray. Yeah. I I will I don't know. So, I mean, it basically, everywhere I I am aside from Vegas, is a a small town. And if there's not a ton of open space immediately out of my front door, it's within, you know, a walk or 5 to 10 minutes of a drive, sometimes 20 minutes if we wanna go to, like, Mount Tam or something like that. But, we're like, when here in Sonora, there's a whole giant freaking open park right around the corner. And even when I was in Vegas, we'd go out to the desert, 3, 4 times a week where it was just like miles and miles and miles of hiking in fucking the middle of nowhere.
And then, yeah, you know, I've got yeah. There was a empty vacant lot across the street from the apartment complex. I'd take him and my neighbor's pit bull. Shout out to Medusa and,
[01:01:18] Benjamin Balderson:
go throw a ball. They were always the most excellent pictures. Of course, they had Gomez in them, and he is one sexy boy. It's true. He's
[01:01:29] Steve :
a freaking beast.
[01:01:32] allen marcus:
A lot of these Midwest communities have multiple pet parks in town. They don't have many skate parks. I've been driving through Montana. You might see a few skate parks, and then they'd have a billboard about meth awareness. But I don't know that people in Montana are so concerned about emotional support animals. It seems that the anecdotally, anyway, it seems that stereotypically, it's probably California, probably maybe New York, maybe some of these larger cities where people are having a lot of stress. They're really stressed about life and financial concerns. So my question then was in terms of having an invisible disability and needing an emotional support animal and not having an income and having many, many, many 1,000 of dollars in debt, who's gonna foot the bill for the organic dog food that these support animals are gonna require?
[01:02:42] Steve :
Oh, no. They're first in the Soylent van.
[01:02:46] Benjamin Balderson:
You think Soylent Green is people.
[01:02:50] allen marcus:
Are are they feeding soy lattes to their to their puppy dogs?
[01:02:54] Steve :
Oh, wow. I hope not. That would be awful. That would be. I've I okay. I've seen I've seen dogs kind of try to go for coffee drinks, but they usually aren't into them. There's something about coffee that doesn't it's not super appealing. I do have video of, one of my ex's chickens drinking my coffee, though. That was pretty funny.
[01:03:25] Benjamin Balderson:
We have to fight the cats off. The cats like coffee.
[01:03:29] allen marcus:
Cats like coffee.
[01:03:32] Benjamin Balderson:
I don't I don't drink coffee, but Christie is consistently fighting with the cats about her coffee. She does put a substantial amount of cream in her coffee. Might be it, and Steve is the one that taught me the gloriousness of of cream and coffee. So thank you, Steve. Quite welcome.
[01:03:50] Steve :
You gotta put it in first, though. You gotta put it in first.
[01:03:55] Benjamin Balderson:
Explain that to me.
[01:03:57] Steve :
There's a chemical reaction that takes place at both ends when you pour, you know, cream in the coffee. And if you do it first, it, like, melts away some more of the acidity to it.
[01:04:13] Benjamin Balderson:
Uh-huh. Okay. You're gonna have to hang on because I can't hear you over that. Okay. Go ahead. Okay.
[01:04:18] Steve :
Yeah. When you pour it in first, it, like like, quite literally helps absorb a lot of the acidity
[01:04:25] allen marcus:
as opposed to when you pour it in afterwards even when you stir it. Well, you you deflated my debate there because I was gonna I was gonna bring up the concern about the pH level and the acidity of adding, you know, milk or dairy product to coffee, and that would be a huge concern. But you're telling me somehow, scientifically, magically, you put the cream in there first. Mhmm. It stirred up real nice. 100%. Hot coffee in there,
[01:04:48] Steve :
and it just has a chemical reaction. You're you're supposed to pour coffee between, like, 206 and 208 degrees. Mhmm. Okay.
[01:05:00] allen marcus:
Okay. So that might answer my question that I had also about the emotional sport animals because I feel real anxious and nervous after having a half a cup of coffee, and I just start getting jittery. And if, you know, that rubs off on the animals, if they get nervous too, if I'm just talking too fast because I had a cup of coffee because I went to a a kit kitten cafe in Japan, and they served me coffee. And they had cute girls in, you know, schoolgirl or whatever the French maid costumes and, like, that really that fabric is really just stimulating, and it's just, like, overstimulating. And I just keep talking about it, and then they try to sit you down and calm me down. They put a kitten on your lap. I just pet the kidney and drink the coffee. And it's like I've never even been to Japan, but I've dreamed about it my entire life. I posted about it on Reddit, and then can I get an emotional service item?
It makes me feel better that way.
[01:05:48] Steve :
Well, I hope it works. I do. I do. I hope it works. It's it's the fantasy that
[01:05:53] allen marcus:
that keeps keeps me living, and that's really really what we're doing in in podcasting. It's a dream that someone's gonna one day listen to this and leave a comment on the page. We had that conversation earlier about people were quitting the podcasting game to become bartenders and waitresses.
[01:06:11] Benjamin Balderson:
Mhmm. Yeah. Brian, Steve. We
[01:06:14] Steve :
Probably pays better.
[01:06:16] allen marcus:
It probably does.
[01:06:22] Benjamin Balderson:
I love it. He's definitely making more money.
[01:06:26] Steve :
There's there's not definitely not a a ton to be had doing the kind of show that, you know, we do.
[01:06:36] allen marcus:
The the top dogs on Patreon, they're getting the big bucks from from Patreon supporters. This is where we're talking about value for value now, and we, digitally busk and ask for for not donations, not for tips, but for value.
[01:06:51] Benjamin Balderson:
That that there there's a there's a reason that, rich and famous are 2 separate words.
[01:06:58] allen marcus:
Thought that's a country music artist.
[01:07:01] Steve :
I thought that was big and rich.
[01:07:03] allen marcus:
That's the guy. Yeah. I think so. I don't assume his gender.
[01:07:08] Steve :
I think so. Sam Treppoli has a jelly roll joke in his special.
[01:07:16] allen marcus:
Jelly roll was that's the guy who testified alongside Dee Snider
[01:07:21] Benjamin Balderson:
with the Gorn Ponder. That's the guy who sings, eighties bar music and pretends like it's country. We're not gonna sing.
[01:07:29] Steve :
And he also used to rap or still does. Something like that.
[01:07:34] Benjamin Balderson:
Dude, the rap country thing, that drives me insane. Can't stand it.
[01:07:40] Steve :
Yeah. No. It's pretty terrible. It's yeah. Yeah.
[01:07:45] allen marcus:
Sturgill Simpson's good, though, so that helps. Could maybe get an emotional sport quail or something that just coos.
[01:07:52] Steve :
Right. I would like to get an emotional support 1919 Martin mandolin. That would be nice. A mandolin? Like, an instrument? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. As long as we're just, you know, get a doctor to write me a letter. Mhmm.
[01:08:11] Benjamin Balderson:
I feel like I should blame this on the BC boys, though. Mhmm. Like, they they were the first ones. They, like, did rock rap.
[01:08:19] allen marcus:
Right. So I'd like to register my base guitar as an emotional support instrument. Mhmm. Whenever I play a rock me like a hurricane, it just calms me down for some reason. Right. Right. Puts you in the zone. That was my college roommate. He's a marine Semper fear. Alright. Hoorah or whatever it was. Uh-huh. He'd bring out his emotional support base and just stir everything up. Alright. He'll rock you like a hurricane over and over again all afternoon. Made him feel real nice.
[01:08:51] Steve :
Alright. Alright. I mean, he he could have had an emotional support drum kit.
[01:08:58] allen marcus:
Yeah. Okay. So do I have to get a letter for having a GarageBand license
[01:09:03] Steve :
if I'm gonna rent an apartment? If you live in a place with yeah. I was gonna say if you're in an apartment or somewhere with an HOA. Yeah.
[01:09:11] allen marcus:
The the noise complaint.
[01:09:14] Benjamin Balderson:
But, I mean, if you're in a garage band, aren't you supposed to have emotional issues?
[01:09:20] allen marcus:
Like, if you're gonna be successful at it. Grunge. Yep. That's the whole the whole grunge genre, probably.
[01:09:29] Steve :
Man, a lot of the there's some very, very, very, suspicious deaths that came out of that era and a couple of people who just really like drugs.
[01:09:43] allen marcus:
And because of that trauma, there's a whole generation of people needing emotional sport animals to deal with. Right?
[01:09:49] Steve :
You're not wrong.
[01:09:52] Benjamin Balderson:
So Are you saying Courtney Love created emotional sport animals?
[01:09:57] Steve :
Dave Grohl.
[01:09:59] allen marcus:
Dave Grohl. Mhmm. The Foo Foo Fighters. Yeah. The Foo Fighters.
[01:10:03] Steve :
Yeah.
[01:10:05] allen marcus:
Like, I am concerned about my labs and alien abduction, so I need protection animals. And little green and gray men from probing me every night.
[01:10:16] Steve :
And a Russell Brand amulet. Did you see that commercial?
[01:10:22] allen marcus:
Russell Brand. I feel like he's gonna be walking around with a dove at some point. His whole history of Guaranteed. He's full on ready to larp being Jesus Christ.
[01:10:33] Steve :
Oh, I did 100%. But, yeah, the the Ambulance commercial is hilarious. I'll I'll I'll if you haven't seen it, I'll put it in the Telegram group later.
[01:10:43] allen marcus:
Have you seen Ambulance too? Brand get me too ed and just, like, rubber balled it. Just, like, it just, like, bounced right off and he's also video too. Ben, he's going hamlet too style, the whole rock me sexy Jesus thing where this former drug sex addict, Russell Brand, is now somehow sexual emotional release Jesus, where he's baptizing other men in pools. In his skivvies. In his tidy white in tidy whiteys. The holy fellas with another fella in him freaking me on these. Right. Yeah. Culture is
[01:11:21] Steve :
quite weird. It is Face of the Christian right in America. That's what cracked me up at their little Zionist Woodstock that they did a couple of weeks ago. Right. The griftapalooza there. When it was a Canadian, Jordan Peterson, dressed up like 2 face from Batman. Okay. And Russell Brand, a Brit, dressed up like a 19 eighties, San Bernardino used car salesman, and they're leading the little revival there to Trump rally in in prayer. It's like, how much more blasphemous could you possibly get where you've got 2 people that aren't even from this country lecturing the audience about rescuing the republic?
[01:12:09] allen marcus:
Right. Yeah. So Jordan Peterson is prepared to sell you a $40 a month subscription to Jordan Peterson online university. It's gonna be better than Arizona online or Full Sail University or any other education, PragerU, you know, just pray for PragerU because Jordan Peterson University online, $40 a month subscription, is gonna give you That seems cheap for a Benzodiazepine
[01:12:33] Benjamin Balderson:
addiction.
[01:12:36] allen marcus:
Right. He's got a guy in Mexico now. He's got elearning courses. So you're gonna, you know, watch videos and get certifications for life skills from Jordan Peterson who wears multicolored vest, not quite like Joseph, the dream interpreter from the bible here, but you'll probably hear about all sorts of biblical lessons from Jordan Peterson and celebrity guest Russell Brand by giving him $40 a month. That's the future of college education, everybody. I'm a Canadian professor who professed that he was confused about pronouns and wouldn't stand it anymore. So that's where we go with emotional support animals, pronouns, danger hairs, enabling the
[01:13:23] Steve :
Emotional support, manosphere.
[01:13:25] allen marcus:
The children of society. And that was that's really the concern, and I've stated this before already. The You know what? He man had thunder cat, Steve. Yeah. That, 3 non blondes. What's going on? We never got an answer to that question. They've been asking him what's going on. What's going on? The,
[01:13:49] Steve :
that was the trigger. There was this TV show called Sense8 that was basically, like,
[01:13:56] allen marcus:
a DMT trip. Was was that a Wachowski production? I don't know. I think it was. I'm not sure. Might have been.
[01:14:06] Steve :
But it was, like, heavy on some predictive programming, in a really trippy way. But these people got activated to be able to communicate telepathically with each other and, like, locate each other and stuff like that.
[01:14:21] allen marcus:
Mhmm.
[01:14:23] Steve :
It when this DJ put on what's going on by For Non Blondes and with a a techno beat to it, and that's what triggered their their abilities.
[01:14:41] allen marcus:
It's a American Ultra movie.
[01:14:44] Steve :
Yeah. Kinda.
[01:14:46] allen marcus:
That that theme persists as far as Wachowski's next project, the Wachowski brothers, nay, siblings, now sisters.
[01:14:56] Benjamin Balderson:
Right. Tusk's sisters.
[01:14:59] allen marcus:
Probably working on, a film script involving someone who wants to unalive JK Rowling, I think is the the last I heard of what they were working on.
[01:15:14] Steve :
Alright. Okay.
[01:15:17] allen marcus:
Well, good luck, ladies. And I believe it. It's 2024. I've read stranger headlines in that.
[01:15:24] Benjamin Balderson:
There was also a d Dude, I just I heard today that there was a third attempt on Trump. I mean, are you fucking serious? Well, okay.
[01:15:33] Steve :
No. That doesn't really seem to be the case.
[01:15:38] allen marcus:
The Eagle hasn't landed?
[01:15:40] Steve :
Well, in the first place, the he was he got 2 misdemeanor gun possession charges. He bonded out on 5 grand. He's like a freaking, what is it? He has a a organization called, I think, America Happens. Uh-huh. He ran for office in Nevada, like, a year and a half ago. Did this happen on indigenous people day and how disrespectful that would be? Oh, that would have been a bummer. Right. Yeah. His name is Vin Miller. And, the lady that is his partner in the America happens thing is this forever candidate in Nevada named Mindy Robinson. And I actually met her once, I think, at Freedom Fest. Freedom Fest.
[01:16:29] allen marcus:
Yeah, brother. Freedom Fest.
[01:16:31] Steve :
And, oh, dude. It was hysterical.
[01:16:35] Benjamin Balderson:
Are you saying this guy killed Dennis Hoff?
[01:16:39] allen marcus:
Allegedly. Are you making allegations?
[01:16:42] Steve :
No. No. I'm not.
[01:16:50] allen marcus:
That's funny. So if we get this monorail back on to Epcot Center to Disney World, the strangest place that you might expect to see an emotional and sword animal is probably in a courtroom setting. So there were discussions as to whether or not allowing witnesses on the stand to have an animal, a cat or a dog, maybe even a teddy bear, would influence the jury in some way or another. And there was concern about allowing, you know, an animal into the witness box with the witness who's giving a testimony and how that might influence a jury decision. What do you guys think about that?
[01:17:35] Benjamin Balderson:
Well, in the last actual debate I was in, my cat was on my lap, and I unbeknownst to me, every time I would talk, the cat would go and then, like, go like that at the camera. Right. And I was told specifically afterwards that they would debate me, but they would not debate the cat.
[01:17:58] Steve :
That's pretty funny.
[01:18:00] Benjamin Balderson:
Yeah.
[01:18:01] Steve :
That's good good stuff. Yeah. I I I think I think that there's a potential to have an impact on a jury, but there's also I mean, they go to great lengths to dress witnesses in a specific way to influence the jury. They're, you know, the both experts and, you know, people that are called the witness to the witness stand get to varying degrees coached to the point of training. You know, the expert witness is a profession.
[01:18:39] allen marcus:
Did those people have conferences and shit? So, like, if Monica Lewinsky was advised to wear a dress with a stain on it so she could stay up stand up and show the stain that she's wearing Mhmm. That'd be better for her case then?
[01:18:54] Steve :
Maybe. Maybe. She's she seems to have, you know, done just fine.
[01:19:00] allen marcus:
Well, we have Court TV and all of these trials.
[01:19:05] Benjamin Balderson:
Dude, it's the last time you tell Johnny Depp. We need to get a hold of Monica. Mhmm. We are missing out on a gold mine with the Monica Lewinsky Blunt Wraps.
[01:19:15] allen marcus:
Right. Okay. So in that trial, who was the woman who had the the nose job done and she had the big makeover?
[01:19:27] Steve :
Jen not Jennifer Flowers. Jennifer no. Wait. You're talking about, Susan Allred?
[01:19:36] allen marcus:
No. No. There was
[01:19:39] Benjamin Balderson:
I was trying to write a rap song about it. I have to check my notes later. How are we supposed to keep track all the all the hoes that Bill Clinton was sleeping with? That way Right. Allegedly.
[01:19:48] allen marcus:
Allegedly. So if he wants to dress like a peacock
[01:19:53] Benjamin Balderson:
definition of the word is is? ISIS.
[01:19:58] allen marcus:
Terrorist group. It's there's the known knowns and the known unknowns and unknown unknowns, and there's Donald Rumsfeld and every bush in between Mhmm. Allegedly.
[01:20:11] Steve :
Are you gonna care? Where are you going?
[01:20:16] allen marcus:
I'll go sit beside them. I don't care. Having an emotional support put me out there. Wife in your life is really beneficial.
[01:20:24] Steve :
Mhmm. For sure. I can't wait to get back to my girlfriends.
[01:20:31] allen marcus:
Have you ever been to a wedding with emotional support animals?
[01:20:37] Steve :
Yeah.
[01:20:38] Benjamin Balderson:
Are those bridesmaids?
[01:20:47] Steve :
Yes. They are.
[01:20:49] allen marcus:
Are they, though?
[01:20:52] Steve :
I mean, for the bride, yeah, for the most part.
[01:20:56] Benjamin Balderson:
Also for the other dudes.
[01:20:59] Steve :
Right. Right. That's funny. They're they're all cousins.
[01:21:11] Benjamin Balderson:
Our debate is not very debatish this week. We are trying to get things together. Marcus just got home. I am not yet home. I will be home next week. We will have something more fiery and, more lined out for everybody next week, but we wanted to get something back going here this week.
[01:21:32] allen marcus:
Yeah. This is our exploratory sort of brainstorming session where we have to come up with a contrived topic that's gonna, engender, you know, gender discourse and controversy and puns, lots of puns. Of course, people love that. That's how you win a debate with with humor and laughter. And the person who can present the most funny argument sincerely will probably win the audience admiration.
[01:22:05] Steve :
That's fair.
[01:22:07] Benjamin Balderson:
It's a charisma
[01:22:09] allen marcus:
and the way you you speak with confidence.
[01:22:12] Benjamin Balderson:
It's certainly not the intelligence of the argument. In fact, you you learn quickly as soon as you're as soon as you debate. If you step over the intelligence bounds, you're you're gonna start losing really quickly. If you make too smart of an argument that they can't make that leap, then nobody's following you. You have got to tailor it down like the newspaper does.
[01:22:42] Steve :
Yeah. No. That's I you're you're supposed to try especially if you're trying to persuade people. You're supposed to speak at, like, a 5th or 6th grade level.
[01:22:54] allen marcus:
Yeah. It's the Donald Trump way of using his words. He has his bob and weave technique where he'll just throw out 5 different ideas, and he'll talk about them. And then you'll circle back to his main points over and over again and then he'll do his little dance and then he'll have his ear attempt and then he'll do something grandstanding and then you'll feel real good about it and you'll go home and and buy that leather bound bible and all the Trump coins that you can find with King Cyrus's face on it, and you learn a little bit about geography too along the way. Where is the Middle East anyway, and why is it in the middle?
Is that the center of the world?
[01:23:35] Steve :
Right. Well, there's, you know, the Far East. Mhmm. So if there's a Far East, there's got to be,
[01:23:50] allen marcus:
a Middle East. Right? Far far east to me is like, you know, New York. Like, the Atlantic Casino
[01:23:58] Steve :
because I live in the Midwest. Yeah. I think they were talking about China.
[01:24:04] allen marcus:
China. Well, I just dig a hole. And if I keep digging, I'll eventually emerge in a golf course in China. Right? Isn't that how that works? I will be a little gopher, and I'll see Bill Murray there and everything anyways. That's true. Is Bugs Bunny the best ever emotional sport animal?
[01:24:25] Steve :
He could be. He could be. Although, I would think that having Foghorn Leghorn as an emotional support animal would be downright hilarious.
[01:24:38] allen marcus:
So now we're gonna You probably wouldn't have a bad day. Do you guys have Not not Speedy Gonzales,
[01:24:43] Benjamin Balderson:
but his cousin?
[01:24:45] Steve :
Slowpoke Rodriguez.
[01:24:47] Benjamin Balderson:
Slowpoke Rodriguez. That is got to be the best emotional sport animal. You can't tell me that dude is not got some awesome Now we're ready to debate you. I'm ready to debate
[01:24:58] allen marcus:
what is the most famous and best emotional sport animal. I'll present the argument that the most famous emotional emotional sport animal is probably Winnie, a golden retriever who gained widespread recognition as the emotional sport dog of the late US senator John McCain. When he was often seen accompanying McCain during his night in the senate, he became a symbol of comfort and companionship during his battle with cancer. So shout out to Winnie helping John McCain along the way.
[01:25:32] Steve :
I would prefer to congratulate the tumor. Yeah.
[01:25:43] allen marcus:
Remember when, Colin Powell died of colon cancer? Yeah. In a prison cell in South Africa, and then everyone forgot about it.
[01:25:54] Steve :
I In a prison cell at South Africa. I don't remember that part.
[01:25:58] allen marcus:
Yeah. He was right there with Gandhi. They were on a hunger strike together Oh. Because of the colon cancer Yeah. That that Colin Powell died of. Yeah.
[01:26:09] Steve :
Yeah.
[01:26:10] allen marcus:
I think he was the leader of the Black Panthers.
[01:26:16] Steve :
I don't have it in front of me in, at the 3rd Eye Carnival in Pueblo a few months back. I don't think it's set up on Puebla.
[01:26:27] allen marcus:
Puebla.
[01:26:28] Steve :
Puebla. Puebla. Charlie Robinson gave me a a copy of one of his books. And on the, you know, on the inscription, he wrote, Steve, thank you for inviting me to your Black Panther party.
[01:26:46] Benjamin Balderson:
Yes.
[01:26:47] Steve :
Yeah.
[01:26:50] Benjamin Balderson:
What kind of for governor. Panther party.
[01:26:56] Steve :
Yep.
[01:26:58] allen marcus:
The old gump. Do you guys have any information about the, racial division between Honey, I'm already know. Dog owners, emotional support animals. Is it really white people who have the highest percentage of service dogs?
[01:27:15] Steve :
I would I would say yes, but only because barely, you know, majority population. But there are lots of old Mexican ladies who have emotional support dogs. There's lots of black women that have emotional support dogs.
[01:27:38] Benjamin Balderson:
And love to have Do you think if you think percentage wise, it's about equal that that that you you do see more white people with them, but that's just because per capita, we're we're more white as a country.
[01:27:51] allen marcus:
Yeah. I think white is just a louder color. Yeah. Just stands out. White white and proud. Okay. Okay. Even white. Are we gonna debate this? Whether you're white or not? Yeah. I'm trying to get my white balance correct on my camera. See, this is white. This is me. I'm not white. This is white. This is me. We'll white balance our cameras, but that's a racist thing to say. So we need a neutral facial tone, our cameras, I guess, to, like, zero it out or something.
[01:28:30] Steve :
Yeah. No. I don't know.
[01:28:36] allen marcus:
I was in college, and I woke up one morning, and I walked outside, and I saw posts on a door, some white privilege poster. One of the privileges of being white was having a band aid that was a neutral skin tone. I I learned something that day. Okay. That as a white guy, I could buy a band aid and I could put it on and it would be invisible in my skin because it was I will. It matched my skin tone. I'm on a show. I thought they did skin tone Band Aids for, like, 20 years now. They do now. They do now. I went to college a long time ago. Back when colleges were colleges and universities are universities, and we we understood the difference.
[01:29:16] Steve :
Okay. I remember when the town I grew up in, it changed from Anderson College to Anderson University.
[01:29:26] allen marcus:
Was there a Cooper in between it?
[01:29:28] Steve :
Was what, who,
[01:29:29] allen marcus:
Was there a Cooper in between the Andersons? No. No. Uh-uh. So it wasn't like a CNN?
[01:29:36] Steve :
No. It's a Church of God. Not not like a journalism school? No. It's a Church of God University.
[01:29:45] allen marcus:
Okay.
[01:29:46] Benjamin Balderson:
The one that gets me is is some of the bases that you drive now by now that are Space Force bases instead of Air Force bases.
[01:29:56] Steve :
Mhmm.
[01:29:59] Benjamin Balderson:
Like Vandeburg or whatever.
[01:30:03] allen marcus:
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's, that's a good debate point about what commander in chief will lead us into the space race in the best possible way. But my concern is those astronauts, they go through a lot of stress. And do we have animals prepared to travel with them to Mars?
[01:30:24] Steve :
Right. They better.
[01:30:27] allen marcus:
They better. If we don't have packed mules packed up and ready to go to Mars to call in as I just don't I just don't see how those those buggies are gonna are gonna do on the dunes.
[01:30:39] Steve :
Yeah. The Mars rover doesn't have much on, a mule train.
[01:30:46] allen marcus:
No. It's gonna run on fuel at some time.
[01:30:51] Steve :
Right? Especially, yeah, dude, or battery or whatever.
[01:30:57] allen marcus:
I don't know what I don't know if there's even a debate about electric vehicles anymore. I think the debate is over. No one wants them. Yeah. They all Yeah. All the recharging stations in my town have an out of service sign written on them. So there's no place to charge because no one bothered to repair it because no one had an electric vehicle that needed to be charged anymore. I mean, there might be a few targets that have charging stations in the corner of the parking lot where someone will park their Tesla there just to show off. But I think that debate has already been won. When, when,
[01:31:37] Benjamin Balderson:
with whichever rental place what it was, it had, like, a third of their fleet was electric, and they fucking they x those out and said, nope. Going back to gas. Like, when that happened, you knew that the electrics were dead. That it there was nobody gonna be buying them. I was at a dinner party talking to a guy who worked for an electric company,
[01:31:59] allen marcus:
and he told me about a time when they had a demo electric vehicle for the electric company. One of those ladder trucks where they have like the what do they call them? They have little little box that you sit in and it raises it up. A bucket truck. A bucket truck. Okay. We'll call it an electric bucket truck. This thing had to be charged up, and they had it on a tow truck or a trailer or something to drive it near the location. And then they got it off, and they drove it into the demonstration. And they drove it back, but it was a complete farce and and fake because the thing could not travel the extended distance required to go across state lines to demonstrate to a bunch of investors, people who are gonna make the decisions to buy more electric bucket trucks for the electric power companies.
And in the case of these emergencies where these category 11, these hurricanes have been turned up to 11, and they've done a lot of devastation. And now mules are the best options, but electric bucket trucks for power companies are not adopted anywhere. It's completely failed. No one wants them. They don't work. And if electric car companies cannot appeal to electric power plant conglomerates to convert at least half of their fleet to electric bucket trucks, then we have a real problem here, boys. The problem is electric vehicles exist and no one's buying it. And Tesla stocks are plummeting, and SpaceX wants more launches, but their attention is diminishing.
No one cares about Dragon Rocket launches. So what future do we live in? I need an emotional support animal to lead me into 2025 because all my dreams are crashing.
[01:34:09] Steve :
We did an article, I don't know, either earlier this week or last week, but they're doing, like, AI friends, and they're doing, it's like it's like half a Furby, that's, you know, connected to a large language model. Mhmm. And it's their lead it's, like, half a stuffed animal, half a robot, and that's your your friend. That's your emotional support friend. So to an earlier point when we were talking, that could be another way that they start to, you know, limit, reduce the amount of, actual pet ownership.
[01:34:59] allen marcus:
Okay. So it's going to a Furby model. Now I would like to see some of these Furbies placed in microwaves. Those videos would provide so much, consulment to my soul just to see people putting in iPhones and blenders,
[01:35:18] Benjamin Balderson:
Smash Furbies connected to Wi
[01:35:22] Steve :
Fi. Here, I'll I'll show you the article. I'll bring it up. Smart Furbies connected to Wi Fi to access large language. Basically, this is, like, today's fucking,
[01:35:31] Benjamin Balderson:
Catholic priest that that Steve's fucking Steve's picture is hilarious.
[01:35:42] allen marcus:
Cassio made a free
[01:35:44] Benjamin Balderson:
robot designed to cuddle and calm you down. Its own simulated personality and emotions as it enter as you interact with it and can learn to recognize its own. Yep. See, there's no way that that's not taking in downloads and patches and shit like that. No problem. All the time. All the time. Like, this thing is literally the Catholic priest, of today. It's gonna listen to all the things your kid says. This is Like a smart television
[01:36:12] allen marcus:
remote control waiting to hear your Siri Amazon Alexa requests. It just has a wind, a wind filter. You know, those microphones that have wind filters on them, those fuzzy wind filters. That's what that is to me. I see that. Yeah. It does look like a Star Trek Tribble. It does look like a Star Trek
[01:36:34] Benjamin Balderson:
industries. That's nice.
[01:36:37] allen marcus:
That's nice. $398 for, Club Mufflin. Yeah. Put that thing in on my I never heard of it. A a a a a startup called Vanguard
[01:36:51] Benjamin Balderson:
Industries. I've never heard of Vanguard before. Wonder if they're associated with anybody.
[01:36:57] allen marcus:
This thing looks a little bit like the owl from Labyrinth, and I do have my emotional support David Bowie doll standing by. But this thing this thing is not handling my balls tonight.
[01:37:10] Steve :
Right.
[01:37:11] allen marcus:
Not allowing that. I do not consent.
[01:37:13] Steve :
Unlike your life-sized statue of David Bowie.
[01:37:17] allen marcus:
Yeah.
[01:37:18] Steve :
Totally handling your balls tonight. Just in the corner. He just sits there and watches.
[01:37:24] Benjamin Balderson:
Well, I just I just back comb the hair, fluff her. I mean, I do approve of the idea of David Bowie having to be a cock. Like, if you like, what if
[01:37:34] allen marcus:
There is no dance magic dance happening with this mofflin in my bedroom is what I'm saying. That little charging coffin.
[01:37:46] Steve :
Right.
[01:37:48] allen marcus:
Does it come in black? Can we make it in an actual
[01:37:51] Steve :
sarcophagus?
[01:37:53] Benjamin Balderson:
That is so weird.
[01:37:56] allen marcus:
Emotional support robots from Casio from Japan.
[01:38:00] Benjamin Balderson:
Maughlin? Yeah. Study. Stop. Study. Japanese people are so weird,
[01:38:16] allen marcus:
but they're so
[01:38:42] Benjamin Balderson:
I would kill him. I I would But that's not good at anything. Delete as an adult if I thought I got all of a lot of new It's an idea. To feel better about myself. What
[01:38:57] Steve :
What what, Ben?
[01:38:59] Benjamin Balderson:
If I had to carry this around as an adult to feel better about myself, I would self delete. Like, I've been in person friends with both of you, and if I if you saw me doing this and you didn't help me, self delete, I'm holding you accountable.
[01:39:20] allen marcus:
Could I say, Mufflin, play Gojira? Would it play music for me? Maybe. Is it connected to my Spotify account? Could I say, hey, Mufflin, play delivering dog face 2. It's episode 11, emotional support animals. Would it know to do that? Better.
[01:39:40] Steve :
It it better.
[01:39:43] Benjamin Balderson:
It wouldn't be very supportive if it if it didn't.
[01:39:47] Steve :
So that's where that's where the emotional support animal is going to
[01:39:53] allen marcus:
Ugh.
[01:39:55] Benjamin Balderson:
Furby. Dude, what kind of a self respecting adult is gonna nuzzle with a freaking fuzzy
[01:40:03] allen marcus:
fake animal? A Disney adult might.
[01:40:07] Steve :
Yeah. 100%. Mhmm.
[01:40:10] allen marcus:
Hashtag adulting, Twitter, x users would probably
[01:40:15] Benjamin Balderson:
buy a blue check. I mean, on the bright side, these people are typically not reproducing.
[01:40:21] Steve :
I'm guessing, like, 97% of the staff at Google and Adobe. Anyone who works for Mark Zuckerberg, they probably already have them.
[01:40:34] allen marcus:
Yeah. I got one right here. So a lot of these YouTubers now use these microphones, these RODE microphones, and they just, like, wear them on a necklace. It's it's a big windscreen. It's like a feather duster windscreen. I already have one. Okay. And I can use my imagination and just have a great time pretending. I can pretend all I want that this little windscreen microphone cover is my emotional sport animal. I could probably take this on an airplane, might get a few strange looks, but you know what? I've seen stranger behavior on airplanes. I've seen men raw dogging on airplanes. Me, I'm not gonna raw dog. I'm gonna take some furry stimulating fabric that I can just put in my hands and just rub along my face.
It'll comfort me. It'll soothe me. And it only cost me a couple dollars. I don't need to spend big bucks on some smart wifi connected device to have a large language model to chat with me connected to an app on my phone. This is like I just want the flaps on my underwear that make it so my balls don't stick to the sides of my legs. Okay.
[01:41:45] Benjamin Balderson:
Then it it's all good after that. It's some fresh socks. Man, we've had telethonic
[01:41:51] allen marcus:
technology for years years years, and these Japanese people are trying to sell us the same device and then make it unintimate and unsexual. We're going in reverse here, folks.
[01:42:05] Steve :
Well, I mean, I think they they got it the other way too. I do. I Do they? Yeah. We've investigated. Unblunt force wisdom, we've investigated. It's been a while. Yeah. I guess that is a step up from selling drawers in the vending machine.
[01:42:27] Benjamin Balderson:
Yeah. Yeah. If they if they'll if they'll if they'll buy used drawers in a in a vending machine, you know that their little stuffy animals got, like, a secret hole in the back somewhere.
[01:42:39] Steve :
Or like a vibrate setting?
[01:42:41] Benjamin Balderson:
Yeah.
[01:42:44] allen marcus:
Yeah. But we began the conversation talking about strange tongues and strange places and unexpected licks unless that muffin what was it called? Mafflin?
[01:42:57] Steve :
Mafflin. Mufflin?
[01:42:58] allen marcus:
Muffler? I don't know what it is. It doesn't have a it doesn't have a muffler. Gonna be like connecting to the Wi Fi. It doesn't have a wet 70% of mufflins were s 8 today.
[01:43:11] Steve :
The Maughlin Rights Organization pops up.
[01:43:22] allen marcus:
You know, I'm okay with giving Furby licenses to people who need emotional support animals. I think that's a step in the right direction. These animals are going to look at the face of their owners and realize, wow. This is not great. I wanna reincarnate quickly. Please take me to a dog bark behind the shed and just leave me there forever. End me now. My owner is emotionally narcissistic and taking all my marbles away from me, not not leaving me alone at all. Please think of the animals who have to be forced to be emotional support animals for Disney adults who need too much. They have too many needs, and those emotional sport animals are milked dry. There's nothing left to them.
Please, please think of the animals.
[01:44:25] Benjamin Balderson:
Nobody wants to live with the danger here.
[01:44:28] Steve :
Of an angel. Angel. I was gonna hear,
[01:44:32] allen marcus:
sir, McLaughlin from the grave chiming in.
[01:44:37] Benjamin Balderson:
For just $2 a week, we could help free a poor suffering animal from living with a danger hair that nobody else would live with. It run to let these animals suffer when they have crazy women lording over them, forcing them to listen to their stories?
[01:45:03] allen marcus:
$2. I do realize this is an unlicensed live stream conversation. We have a few people in chat. We do have listeners, so our prayers have been answered.
[01:45:18] Steve :
Oh, shit.
[01:45:19] allen marcus:
People are listening to this nonsense. This is kind of a this is kind of a t ball debate. We're debating with training wheels on. We're testing the grounds of our our debate skills, our charisma levels are increasing. We've been away from from strange furry microphones.
[01:45:37] Benjamin Balderson:
Marcus and I got sucked up in a hurricane. We're just now getting back. It's true.
[01:45:43] allen marcus:
There was a hurricane, and it did rock me. It did rock me. It rocked me. Rock me, Amadeus. It was a classical hurricane in the true sense of the word. It was very operatic. I come home. I listen to the news, and some guy on television describes the hurricane as being tornadic. And that was traumatic for me to hear a newscaster coin a new word describing a hurricane as being tornadic and having tornadic conditions. The hurricane was misidentified as being like a tornado. Anybody ever used that word before, tornadic? Have you heard that? It's not fair
[01:46:27] Steve :
to hurricanes. It's not fair to tornadoes. There were 3 the I mean, there's a bunch of different videos of tornadoes touching down prior to the hurricane making landfall.
[01:46:40] allen marcus:
Was it a sharknado?
[01:46:42] Steve :
Yeah. It was we had running odds on AM wake up, but, I don't think we ever got definitive proof one way or the other. Okay. I did see where an alligator, like, washed into some dude's freaking screened in porch.
[01:46:58] Benjamin Balderson:
That would be a hell of a wake up. You step outside to let the dog out, and there's a fucking alligator in your fucking enclosed porch. Mhmm.
[01:47:07] Steve :
Yeah. Yeah. It was like, I don't know, like, bottom of the shin high water that they were walking through, like, in their house.
[01:47:19] allen marcus:
It'd be embarrassing if you have to go to school and you've grown a couple inches and you're wearing those high water pants because you just don't have longer pants because you grew you had a growth spurt. Right. And that's really what we need to encourage in these Disney adults, emotional growth spurts. Just grow a little bit.
[01:47:36] Steve :
Mhmm.
[01:47:38] allen marcus:
Yeah. No. Danger hair Disney adults with emotional support animals have annoyed everybody on the Internet for far too long. So it's time to call them out
[01:47:50] Steve :
for what they are. They've also annoyed everybody at the DMV for far too long.
[01:47:55] Benjamin Balderson:
And you know what it takes to feel sorry for people at the DMV?
[01:48:04] Steve :
Dude, is it my last run-in with a Disney adult was at the DOV. Were they working there? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You could see into the office. Okay. Yeah.
[01:48:17] allen marcus:
And, They have all their Funko Pops on their desk. All the freaking,
[01:48:22] Steve :
like the dude, there was, a couple of different, like, you know, dolls, stuffed animal things. Right. There were Funko Pops. There were some posters. There was a wall of what looked like it might have been, like, ticket stubs or passes or something like that.
[01:48:41] allen marcus:
Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yep. That's kinda what teenagers do. Every every concert is a new experience, and every Taylor Swift era is something that they wanna celebrate. Again, these are behaviors of of teenagers. We have a separation, we have a right of passage to make into adulthood, and having an emotional service animal is not the same as having a summer spent at a dude ranch and becoming a man.
[01:49:11] Steve :
That's fair. That's fair. Although, I wouldn't advocate that for the women. But
[01:49:17] allen marcus:
Well, you know, I think we can accept women at dude ranches. It is 2024. Okay. It's very inclusive of you. And that's really my biggest argument for expanding the legal parameters of emotional sport animals and making it far more legitimate because of that community aspect. It really is again the empathy of having an animal and the responsibility. And I'm basing my entire entire argument on 2 films, Marley and Me and Turner and Hooch.
[01:49:55] Steve :
You never actually saw Marley and Me.
[01:49:58] allen marcus:
I saw the trailer, and I learned everything I needed to know.
[01:50:04] Steve :
They gave it do a lot of people make fun of that movie. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Turner and Mooch was, what, Tom Hanks on run amok?
[01:50:17] allen marcus:
Right. Right. Yeah. And there's that movie where he had an emotional support mermaid.
[01:50:24] Steve :
Oh, yeah.
[01:50:26] Benjamin Balderson:
And really that's probably Yeah. But that's when he was making the transition from the really pervy, weird, tranny comedian to Yeah. Like, wholesome guy.
[01:50:37] Steve :
Mhmm. Yep. Yeah. Well, they'll give you wholesome guy if you put on the dress first.
[01:50:45] Benjamin Balderson:
Yeah. Yeah. The bosom buddies. The bosom buddies. Mhmm.
[01:50:53] allen marcus:
Yep. Is that really what we're getting at here is, generation of Disney adults who are not breastfed at all? They didn't have a loving mother, and now they need to replace that sort of loving motherly instinct with an animal. And, men and women, they both wanna be moms. Is that what it is? I was breastfed, so I'm good to go. I think I think that's that's really what it is. And and the key is to be best fed for just a a perfect amount of time, not too long. I mean, there's some teenagers who are still being breastfed by mothers, and that's just that's just too long. You gotta cut the nipple off at some point. I mean, not physically, and I mean, not literally. Not really. Wow.
Right. But just just just say no no more.
[01:51:42] Steve :
I'm not sure I understand what that means, m s.
[01:51:46] allen marcus:
Are Disney adults expected to do the same things as what the majority does? Are Disney adults expected to have the rights of passage that men and women go through, I don't think we have any expectation for people who call themselves Disney adults. Right. Its whole existence is working at a fake email job, an insurance company, some sort of social media manager somewhere so that they can earn enough money to see Taylor Swift perform at Disney World once Medical billing and coding. Yes. And I do have that code if you guys are ready to write that down. Let me see here. I'm just against these people voting. That's all I'm saying. Mhmm.
[01:52:32] Steve :
Yeah. Well, that's the you know? Yeah. I mean, we do then. Ryan. They they they they should not be allowed to move. That's what I'm saying. They have jobs. They pay bills. They occasionally pick up after their emotional support animals. Yeah. You know, they they go to Whole Foods or Trader Joe's.
[01:52:54] allen marcus:
I have that code. Are you ready to write it down?
[01:52:58] Steve :
Sure.
[01:52:59] allen marcus:
The current procedural terminology that's, registered as capital CPT code 99213 as maintained by the American Medical Association. It's a medical procedural code under the range established patient. Established patient code, 99213. You show that to your provider as an established patient for an office visit or other outpatient visit involving evaluation and management. This visit involves a low level of medical decision making and or the provider spends 20 or more minutes of total time on the encounter in a single date. So you need about 20 minutes with a medical professional, and you might bring in a dog or an emotional support animal to introduce it to the doctor to state your case. And if the doctor likes you and the dog, he will use his letterhead and sign a signature on a piece of paper saying that, yes, you do have a an invisible condition, an invisible handicap condition that is recognized by the doctor and the prescription.
The solution to this is going to be having an emotional service dog, and then you can show that letter to a landlord. And if the landlord likes your dog, then he'll allow the dog and you to stay on his land. That's really what it comes down to. It's all medical billing and the sort of legal structure to allow a classification of an animal from a family pet into an emotional service And
[01:54:40] Benjamin Balderson:
All's I'm saying is I have an invisible medical condition. They're mental.
[01:54:46] allen marcus:
Mhmm. And you have a registered service dog?
[01:54:51] Benjamin Balderson:
Yeah. It's not an emotional support dog. It's a service dog.
[01:54:57] allen marcus:
What are the differences in the training requirements to become a service dog as an actual dog, not as a human who is in service to another human? That would be, like, a collared thing.
[01:55:10] Benjamin Balderson:
Well, like, mine mine has to react to me getting ready to have a seizure.
[01:55:14] allen marcus:
Mhmm.
[01:55:16] Benjamin Balderson:
And then when I'm having a seizure, it has to protect me because, obviously, I'm not particularly people wanna come over and help, and they really just leave me alone. Like
[01:55:31] allen marcus:
And the dog prevents humans from interacting with you during that time. So he's trained to recognize that you're in a vulnerable position and needs to protect you from other humans who wanna be extra helpful. And is there a label on the dog? Does he have a vest? Is he Yeah. Marked clearly that he's a service dog? Yeah.
[01:55:55] Benjamin Balderson:
He does. Meet Ed.
[01:55:57] allen marcus:
Hey, meet Ed. Do they wear reflectors or high visibility gear? So that Yes. They go in the dark?
[01:56:04] Benjamin Balderson:
Yep.
[01:56:06] allen marcus:
They're clearly seen, and they're working, so they're not they're as, an animal in a petting zoo.
[01:56:15] Benjamin Balderson:
And then also, they get their own little IDs and everything.
[01:56:21] allen marcus:
Registered tags, legal documents, all of that ready to go. Yeah. That's a real thing. That was one of the arguments against Yeah. Confusing emotional service animals with emotional support animals with registered service animals because it would kinda blur the lines. Okay. You're showing us identification tag card laminated thing with the there's a picture No. It's a hard card. It's not laminated. It's like a hard one like you're doing. There's a photo ID of the dog on the card. Yep. Okay. So you can't just print one out, and land it and make a fake ID for a a service dog?
[01:57:16] Benjamin Balderson:
Yep. And mind, this guy's registration number on it, his breed. It mandates that this animal and owner have full access to all public places. Full act full access required by law for me. And then on the back, it says, have questions? US Department of Justice Civil Rights Division. Civil Rights Division. Talk it out with them.
[01:57:45] allen marcus:
So it's your civil right and duty.
[01:57:48] Benjamin Balderson:
Yeah. And then mine see to verify the animal's registration number, scan the QR code, or visit, service animal registrar.org.
[01:58:04] allen marcus:
Now I'm suspicious of it being a dotorg and not a dotgov. It's not it's not a government thing. There's an organization. Is this a legitimate thing?
[01:58:14] Benjamin Balderson:
Yeah.
[01:58:18] allen marcus:
Okay. Well, that wins the debate then. That was convincing. Convincing. It was. Yeah. Just some confidence behind that, and I believe you. Chad wants to know, are dogs able to have a conceal and carry license?
[01:58:41] Benjamin Balderson:
Yeah. Tear's got Tear's packing heat. He's packing heat.
[01:58:46] allen marcus:
It's like, cat bar cast. Yep. And, conceal and carry for, these nuts.
[01:58:54] Steve :
Yeah. Right.
[01:59:00] allen marcus:
It's back to, bomb sniffing dogs because your dog's bomb.com.
[01:59:05] Steve :
The Go Man's doesn't really conceal. Neither just fear for that matter. Pretty much open carry with with those guys. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
[01:59:17] Benjamin Balderson:
He's pretty proud.
[01:59:19] Steve :
Well, I've seen, like, dog vests with, with holsters, though.
[01:59:30] Benjamin Balderson:
Those are pretty John Wick movie?
[01:59:34] Steve :
I guess so. I don't know. I didn't see it.
[01:59:37] allen marcus:
Are there secret service animals secretly in service?
[01:59:42] Steve :
Oh, for sure. For sure.
[01:59:48] Benjamin Balderson:
Tears don't got no special things like that on it. It's just, that's not tier. That's Issa. They all kinda look the same. Racist.
[02:00:01] allen marcus:
Tier, Issa, service dog. I can read that. That's legible. That's a big bold font. Service dog high visibility.
[02:00:11] Benjamin Balderson:
White text on black font. Yeah. Now you got the the handle back here and a thing. And There's a meathead. I meathead. Everybody loves you.
[02:00:22] allen marcus:
Yes. Everybody loves you. It's really those those puppy dog eyes that just kinda calm everybody down.
[02:00:30] Benjamin Balderson:
Hi, Biggus. Good. Talking about you, Biggus. He is sleeping. He's a pit bull. That's what they do.
[02:00:44] allen marcus:
I'm so right. It's been a real NPR evening for me too. Real talk radio. Love it. Pretty calm and very emotional and supportive of of of both of you get both of your dogs tonight. We have some art. We have some new art. I don't know that anyone listening will see the art, but we'll we'll make the art more visible.
[02:01:06] Benjamin Balderson:
And we'll get you guys a good hot debate next week. Hopefully, we can get a guest so it's not us debating each other.
[02:01:15] allen marcus:
We're just gonna get you the back rubs and high fives tonight. That's fine. It's the bro down, throw down.
[02:01:25] Steve :
Right.
[02:01:26] allen marcus:
It's not a verbal combat, but we'll get there. We've got some anger directed towards some ortho Yeah. Wally said he'll
[02:01:36] Benjamin Balderson:
come on. That one guy debated that one night that you wanted to come on. He said he'll come on. That'd be fun. It was, like, the night before I left for the trip. So Right. That has not been followed up upon.
[02:01:49] allen marcus:
Right. And we are in good faith. We are exploratory in nature. We just wanna have a real contrived clickbait topic title to bring all the boys to the yard that want our milkshake.
[02:02:06] Benjamin Balderson:
Boys do like milkshakes.
[02:02:08] allen marcus:
It's it's the it's the marketing of the material that we've been struggling with. So that's the value for value model. We've provided some value, some information, some, licensing, and,
[02:02:21] Benjamin Balderson:
what was it? The medical code? So you can bring that to your doctor. Out there and make some fights is what we gotta do, like fight club. We gotta get out there and pick some fights and get in some good arguments, and then we'll do just fine.
[02:02:36] allen marcus:
It's not like fight club where we're not talking about deliberating dog face sues. We're talking about deliberating dog face sues at every opportunity. Marketing ourself and our our brand name here to get some recognition to, talk with Jordan Peterson level academics and just really shut them down.
[02:02:56] Steve :
That'd be fun.
[02:02:58] allen marcus:
That's that's the goal.
[02:03:00] Benjamin Balderson:
And for that That would be fun. We wanna make sure we'll make sure we'll make sure we'll make sure the psychotic break.
[02:03:06] allen marcus:
Right. Yep. Mhmm.
[02:03:11] Benjamin Balderson:
Like, it seemed like it was fun until he had to shoot himself to kill the other half of himself, then that that you know, that's too far. Yeah. That didn't look like fun.
[02:03:23] allen marcus:
Not fun at all. Maybe, Bill Maher. You know, he had his his show, and he's just doing softball questions. All these big shows are just giving each other back rubs and high fives and not even pretending to explore actual controversy. It's all rehearsed. It's all preplanned drama that's all fake, but we're ready to bring the heat and be real.
[02:03:51] Steve :
Bill Maher is an absolute clown.
[02:03:54] allen marcus:
You hear that Bill Maher?
[02:03:57] Steve :
Oh, I think he knows. I think he knows.
[02:04:02] allen marcus:
He's gotta know. He's got a big red nose, and we're about to boop it and beep it. I I tell you what, though. Like, the way
[02:04:09] Benjamin Balderson:
Andrew Wilson manhandled, that libertarian dude that's on more mainstream and allowed to speak with all the mainstream guys. Like Well, yeah. If those guys come on shows like that and dudes like Andrew just manhandle them, those dudes are not are not gonna play with us because, like, they're just scared. They were already scared. And then, like, that dude made it it's like Andrew just like like a little kid, treated him like a little kid. We're talking about Dave Smith. Right? Yeah.
[02:04:40] Steve :
Yeah. Yeah. I saw, like, a half an hour of that. Like And I was, like, right after Dave Smith freaking manhandled Chris Cuomo.
[02:04:52] Benjamin Balderson:
That's what I'm saying. Like, holy cow. Those guys would never debate with any of us because they would get smoked. Like, they if they have if they have an actual debate about anything, they're in trouble.
[02:05:14] Steve :
That does seem to be the case. It really does. Like, just way in way over their heads.
[02:05:25] allen marcus:
We're gentlemen. This is a separate club. We're just debating for the sake of debate. I'll choose a position or have one assigned to me. I'll debate anything. Just give me the position. I'll fill up airspace on a microphone. We just wanna have fun with this. Mhmm. We just wanna explore ideas, figure things out. Nothing's decided until the end of the debate, and the debate never ends.
[02:05:50] Benjamin Balderson:
It just keeps going on and on. Well, I mean, except for whether cheese is the primary food that you should be
[02:05:58] allen marcus:
eating. The the moon is made of cheese.
[02:06:01] Benjamin Balderson:
Like, we already figured out that the poo food pyramid was incorrect, and it's mostly incorrect because they tried to make meat the primary substance, and it's obviously cheese.
[02:06:13] allen marcus:
That's why government has reserves of cheese in caves where the lizard people protect it. Yeah. David Ike, we're ready to have a debate. We know we live in a simulation, and we're ready to have a simulated debate debate with you in your matrix Zoom room. Let's go. I saw you the other night during the Aurora Borealis. You were just there. You were glowing, Riley. It was brilliant. I love that performance. You united the right and the left and all all the people who didn't pay for their television licenses over there across the pond. Let's have a tea party. You know, Sarah Palin not invited. Let's do this thing. Politics, occult geometry, whatever you wanna talk about, let's go David Ike or Jamie Ike. You have your whole iconic network of sons and daughters of the revolution.
17/76 has never been, like, 1984 or whatever Alex Jones wants to do. Oh, let's go, Bill Hicks. Come on. We wanna have fun with this. Blast when we blast. Fighting words, fighting words, freestyle, hip hop, you know, do some beatboxing, whatever it takes. We'll spin around on cardboard boxes, b boy, beat boxing, whatever it is. We'll make fools of ourselves. Just let us debate. It's gonna get embarrassing if we have to keep begging anyone to debate us. And I'm prepared to be a Disney adult debater. I don't care the color of your hair. Right. You are not prepared to be This is an audio podcast.
Beers are not required, but recommended.
[02:07:59] Benjamin Balderson:
What do you guys wanna see us debate about? Right. Yeah. There's no
[02:08:04] Steve :
I gotta jump out here in a minute for you guys.
[02:08:07] allen marcus:
Don't jump. You're like living. I'm seated. We need to see you next week.
[02:08:12] Steve :
I more or less need to stand up. Stay off of bridges. To a different room. I'll be home next week.
[02:08:19] Benjamin Balderson:
Marcus and I are home safe. Yep. The the the road did not swallow Marcus. Bill and Tanno and Marcus and Lee and company all kicked that thing apart and saved everybody.
[02:08:34] allen marcus:
Darren b threw out a great video for a coalition. Face dudes do.
[02:08:39] Benjamin Balderson:
Yeah.
[02:08:44] allen marcus:
Do you guys have any final debate notes? Do you make all your major points? Where where do we stand on this, debate about emotional support animals that we've kind of found our position? Are we still on the fence about it?
[02:09:02] Steve :
I'd I'd you know, I'd really, I think that it's one of those things that you kind of want to there should there really should be a vetting process for who gets to have an emotional support animal on some level on some level.
[02:09:24] allen marcus:
It's like every girl asks her father, dad, can I have a pony? And if the father gives her a pony, then she's gonna need a whole horse ranch to raise all of her horses. If you give a mouse a cookie, you'll ask for entire dairy farm. So he always has milk. If you give him an inch, he'll ask for a mile, this type of thing. If we allow emotional support animals in restaurants, then everything becomes table scraps. We have to draw the line somewhere. There has to be clear boundaries and definitions of things. And that's the problem we're facing with the blurring of lines between tornadoes and hurricanes, genderless bathrooms, this type of thing.
Tim Walz, we know we know where you are in Minnesota.
[02:10:16] Steve :
Big fan of horses, Tim Walz.
[02:10:22] Benjamin Balderson:
There there's a song That's good. There's a song in Minnesota that the Minnesota stations made up about, tampons in the restroom, how that's gonna solve everything. It's pretty fucking hilarious.
[02:10:36] Steve :
That's good stuff.
[02:10:37] Benjamin Balderson:
Yeah.
[02:10:41] Steve :
No. I've I've seen yeah. I mean, I have. I've seen, you know, animal, and I don't think, like, the old timers necessarily would have registered them as, emotional support animals unless they had to take a flight. You know? But I've seen that be a very, very beneficial thing. I know, you know, me having a dog is a very beneficial thing for my overall mental health. And Gomez. Dude, he's the best.
[02:11:11] allen marcus:
So I've seen old the other. I know how the story ends. I think at some point, we're gonna debate the the issue, of eugenics and self electing to eject from this mortal coil. That idea to say, you know what? I give up. Inject me. Let me let me go and and reincarnate somewhere else or whatever happens after death. I think that's the big question. We'll probably get into that debate. Maybe cryogenics. Is it worth it to have your brain frozen?
[02:11:44] Benjamin Balderson:
So where I stand on it is, while I think the emotional weakness is ridiculous, I'm all for everybody having animals. So I'm not gonna fight it. I don't care. I have 0 shits to give. But, yeah, the emotional weakness is ridiculous.
[02:12:12] allen marcus:
It does get absolutely absurd. And the way that Alex Jones' gods made frogs, you know, gay is a fact now that we can no longer debate. That's established and on Wikipedia. So bring your Wikipedia articles next week to the debate, and we'll see you in the comment section, if that's okay with you. Because we need your consent.
[02:12:42] Steve :
Have a good night, everybody.
I just dab, Gordon. It hurt. A little bit of pain in that.
[00:00:08] allen marcus:
I'll get you some emotional support tonight.
[00:00:11] Steve :
Right.
[00:00:13] Benjamin Balderson:
I do need an emotional support animal after that.
[00:00:18] Steve :
Scared you? We're live, by the way. Of course, we are. Yeah.
[00:00:23] Benjamin Balderson:
Of course, we are. Yeah. This is our excitement. Slaps back together so hard it hurts.
[00:00:31] Steve :
You're alright.
[00:00:32] allen marcus:
I have to say, my mind completely changed last year when I had chains wrapped around my arms, and I'm introduced to 2 new terrifying dogs. And I'm walking through Sam's Town in Vegas. Is that what it's called? That big casino that we had a big festival in last year. So I'm just That was that casino with with dogs I had just met, and I'm leaning back with both arms being tugged at. I don't even know what I'm doing, but, man, that was my exposure to service dogs. Were those
[00:01:07] Steve :
are those service dogs? Yeah.
[00:01:10] Benjamin Balderson:
Those dogs are illegal in some places.
[00:01:14] allen marcus:
That's what I've heard. Vicious
[00:01:16] Benjamin Balderson:
dogs.
[00:01:18] allen marcus:
So what was our experience in a hotel in Las Vegas walking around with these do we have 3 of them then Yep. In Vegas? I had 2 of them. You had one of them. Yep. We're just walking down the hallways, getting into elevators, and they had the elevator guy. The elevator guy was checking to see that we were actually from the event, and he was just so welcoming. Was he terrified of those dogs?
[00:01:48] Benjamin Balderson:
No. Nope. It, the whole time in Las Vegas, I believe one person reacted poorly to the dogs. And other than that, across the board, it was more, can we molest your dog? Can we rub your dog? Can we get in your dog's face in every possible way, which he thoroughly enjoys.
[00:02:16] allen marcus:
The dogs love the attention?
[00:02:17] Benjamin Balderson:
Oh, yeah.
[00:02:21] allen marcus:
My other experience with a service animal, I think it was what's the breed that Beethoven was? That really large dog? Saint Bernard? Saint Bernard. Yeah. Yeah. So this Saint Bernard was the size of a small pony and was walking through a cafeteria at a Christian campground. And this dog was very large and was mostly well behaved. But to bring a dog through, like, a mall food court or something where there's a lot of scents and aromas and sensations was was sort of a challenge. I don't know if we'll talk about that more tonight about the places where you would not want to see unexpected animals of any kind.
[00:03:09] Benjamin Balderson:
Well, not not not in, like, a sex party.
[00:03:14] Steve :
Right.
[00:03:15] Benjamin Balderson:
You only wanna see expected ones at the sex party. Unexpected ones, things get wild, not a hand.
[00:03:22] allen marcus:
Right. Yeah. When when tongues are just licking places and you're not expecting that.
[00:03:28] Benjamin Balderson:
Yeah.
[00:03:31] Steve :
Yeah. You think it's gonna be Diddy? Oh, wait. No. It's a fucking Saint Bernard. That would be awkward. That would be awkward, man. Yeah.
[00:03:45] Benjamin Balderson:
And and how do you stop the guy? You know? Like, if he gets too excited, what are you gonna do about it?
[00:03:51] Steve :
Right? Better hit him with that GHB baby oil real quick.
[00:03:59] allen marcus:
Right down the gullet. Some of these service animals are wearing, like, Kevlar vests too, so they're, like, battle hardened ready to go. Hello, Patriot. I see you've got a dog. We've got some products for you. This is my tactical service animal. Equipped with tasers and lasers.
[00:04:19] Steve :
Right. Mostly, I just put 6 packs in there. You know? Like and you know they do. You know they do. Good choice. I had a neighbor that, when I lived in Vegas there for a bit who had 2, German shepherds, and he was obviously like a dog handler. You know? And it's a lot of military around there. Mhmm. So, that that was my assumption. I never really asked. But those dogs looked like they're ready to scale a 30 foot wall and, you know, tackle half a fleet of people. They were they're impressive. Very impressive.
[00:05:01] Benjamin Balderson:
When I was in when I was in Germany in 1995, I got stationed in, Misao, which has a k nine, MP unit in there. And on the weekends when you were fucking off, you could, let them dogs attack you. You could just go in there and then put you in a suit and, you know, they were always looking for volunteers to let, you know, let their dogs attack you. Like, holy smokes. It's pretty funny to get drunk and watch other people do it.
[00:05:40] allen marcus:
Is that one of the requirements to having a k nine unit is to allow the canine to tackle you? Yeah. Down.
[00:05:49] Benjamin Balderson:
Seems that way. Seems like there's a lot of getting attacked and letting the dogs attack other people in that training that Steve's talking about. Like, them them damn fucking, German Shepherds, they'll, like, jump, like, 30 feet through the air, snatch your arm, and somehow twist you around like Reggie White or something.
[00:06:10] allen marcus:
No. Pin you to the ground. Yeah.
[00:06:14] Benjamin Balderson:
Yeah. It's it's it's amazing.
[00:06:17] allen marcus:
That's one of the things I looked at for tonight's debate preparation. What's the difference between a guard dog, like a k nine unit, a drug sniffing dog, these types of security animals.
[00:06:30] Benjamin Balderson:
You can't convince me a drug sniffing dog isn't bullshit. Like, I went to prison. Where the that that's a whole debate subject all on its own. The only in prison, we had a saying. The only thing that those dogs smell are ham sandwiches and kites. A kite was something that were an inmate snitches on another inmate. Mhmm. And then they come by with the drug dog and pretend like the drug dog found it, but they already knew it was there because you never you never see them dogs actually find anything. And supposedly, they could find phones, drugs, cigarettes Mhmm. The hell they could. We'd have that stuff right in our crotch and walk right by him, and they wouldn't care. That dog would sniff right at it and not even react for one second. But Yeah. If you had a ham sandwich in your locker, you betcha.
[00:07:22] allen marcus:
I think that's a different sort of fetish is the, crotch sniffing dogs or the panty sniffing dogs. So we'll try to steer clear of any of the fetishism involved with, this topic. Searching on the Internet is a real minefield for this type of thing. You're trying to get serious information, and it's all tied in with jokes and puns and humor and real serious people looking for real weird encounters. So so Craigslist style.
[00:07:57] Benjamin Balderson:
I assume this is this is what we're debating. Since Steve's not here, we should decide or debate our debate positions to just stick him with whatever is at left over.
[00:08:08] allen marcus:
Again, using that word position and handler in in a different context. Hey, man. I just sat back down and heard all that.
[00:08:17] Steve :
I was hoping so.
[00:08:19] allen marcus:
Just trying to just trying to eat a little bit. So where do you hide your ham sandwich in such a circumstance?
[00:08:27] Steve :
Have you heard Ari Shaffir's bit about pocket ham? Pocket ham? Mhmm. I have not. It's fantastic.
[00:08:37] Benjamin Balderson:
Did I send you that bit that that black guy did about different farm animals and then the pig the way the pig talks? Oh, yeah. Oh, god. I just about pissed myself. I laughed so hard.
[00:08:51] Steve :
No. That was good stuff. That was good stuff.
[00:08:56] allen marcus:
Did dogs smell fear? Is that what they're sniffing out?
[00:09:01] Benjamin Balderson:
100%, they smell fear. Like, if you're scared the dog and the dog's not, now you've made the dog on alert. Like, why are you scared, dude? What's your problem? What kind of shenanigans you pulling?
[00:09:18] allen marcus:
So that kinda seems like an argument against these emotional service animals where, again, maybe this will spoil it for later, but I can just go ahead and say my biggest argument against forcing animals into the role of emotional sport is, have you seen What About Bob? Would you wanna be Bill Murray's emotional sport gopher?
[00:09:43] Benjamin Balderson:
Not even groundhogs wanted to be around Bill Murray. Well, I mean, I've seen Groundhog's Day and Caddyshack. I saw Caddyshack. He was real nasty about gophers and Caddyshack. So I've seen that.
[00:09:56] allen marcus:
So the people the kind of person that demands that they get a letter from their what is it? The PCP, their primary care physician so that they can have their emotional sport animal in their government subsidized housing?
[00:10:19] Benjamin Balderson:
Like, you know, these people are the same people that caused the the opioid epidemic. So them writing off that you are such an emotional weak sop that you need, animal around to like a like a childhood blankie is not really that impressive that you got a doctor's note on that. Like I said, they, they were handing out opioids like they were, freaking Tic Tacs.
[00:10:51] Steve :
Right. And a lot of thought you were talking about the Chinese there for a second. I was like, what's the name?
[00:10:57] allen marcus:
I don't really understand. A few years ago, it might have been Chinese. Now more recently, it may be Haitians, but who's to say? Right. I don't believe every headline I read. In 2019 before everyone stopped traveling because the world shut down for for a few months, there were a lot of headlines talking about the absurdity of emotional support animals, including emotional support geckos. There was a peacock that was trying to board an airplane to travel, I think, from California to Florida for some
[00:11:34] Benjamin Balderson:
some emotional support cock?
[00:11:37] allen marcus:
Yes. Yep. Yep.
[00:11:42] Benjamin Balderson:
Well, they you know, peacocks are mean as fuck too. Yeah. They're Like Right. How is that thing emotionally supporting you? Like, at best, it'll take food from you, but but and show off for you, but they're they're kinda mean all around. The news story said that the airline
[00:11:58] allen marcus:
was alerted ahead of time. The passenger with the peacock had contacted the airline saying, I plan to travel with this peacock. It's my emotional stubborn animal. I have a letter from the doctor, yada yada yada. And they repeatedly said, no. We cannot allow a peacock into our airplane. It cannot be carried on at all. It's just not gonna happen.
[00:12:22] Benjamin Balderson:
Well okay. So, because I have grandma Caesars, I actually have a support animal, but it's not an emotional support animal. And so when you're going through the process of this, there's different levels of, animal. And depending on the different level, they have different things that they're allotted. So because my animal because mine's a seizure dog, literally, there's not a single spot that I can go that that dog isn't allowed to go. One time, I even got arrested, and, the cop ended up getting arrested for it afterwards. That was, interesting. I got illegally arrested, and the jail didn't even know if they could stop my service animal from coming in. They're like, we don't know what we can even do here.
So my service animal is eating in a 5 star restaurant new numerous times. I don't fly on planes, but in order to get on a plane, it has to be the medical condition level, like a physical medical condition, not a mental condition. The only thing that those, emotional support letters are supposed to be good for is having, an animal in your home. They can't stop you from having the animal in your home and living with you at that point, so it's a real, plague on, landlords. Mhmm. But, it it doesn't really give you a lot of other rights. You can't just go willy nilly taking the dog into a business because it's your emotional support animal. Really, it it's only good for apartments for the most part or or a house if you're renting or whatever.
[00:14:28] allen marcus:
That's a lot of the anecdote anecdotes I was finding in terms of emotional sport animals being kind of a new thing. And these letters are it's kinda like when you go to a doctor and you're like, doctor, I'm not I can't sleep. I I don't have an appetite. Is there anything that you could is there anything that you could help me with that isn't a pharmaceutical medicine and that doctor might be, you know, there's some natural remedies, some herbs as we might call them, you know, and I could just write you this letter, and you could take it to a CBD shop. And they should be What about a peacock? Could I get a peacock? Could I get a peacock to help me out?
Right. Yeah. Could I get a confidence boosting animal, like, a real flashy animal that I could take to a dog park to get really noticed.
[00:15:25] Steve :
If your weed card doctor hooks you up with an emotional support peacock, you also need to know where your weed card doctor gets his weed.
[00:15:36] Benjamin Balderson:
Yes. Yes.
[00:15:40] allen marcus:
No one was like,
[00:15:41] Benjamin Balderson:
Jay, big deal. That would be the most badass if I went to, like, fucking different speaking events Mhmm. With a peacock as an elephant. Yeah. Mhmm. Yeah. And then I could maybe train Henry. Anybody that got got smarter slick, fucking Henry just runs over and attacks him.
[00:16:03] allen marcus:
You know, my guns are around.
[00:16:06] Benjamin Balderson:
I was gonna take Ostarra with me to Renaissance Festivals. Oh, yeah. Mhmm.
[00:16:14] allen marcus:
We'll have to talk about the legitimacy of man made unicorns.
[00:16:21] Steve :
Are there emotional support goats? Probably not.
[00:16:24] allen marcus:
Not yet. There aren't. Probably not.
[00:16:27] Benjamin Balderson:
They're less of an asshole than a peacock.
[00:16:30] Steve :
That's fair.
[00:16:33] allen marcus:
I do want an emotional support unicorn
[00:16:37] Benjamin Balderson:
to attend to Well, I think there's an all take in an emotional support unicorn, but that bastard Tom Cruise fucking he did not save the last unicorn. You know? Have, my emotional support, David Bowie, with me. It's the
[00:16:48] allen marcus:
sport David Bowie with me. 30th anniversary ish. Jennifer Connelly is there too, just in case. There's a lot of movies that people can fall asleep to. Apparently, that's the whole thing. So you could have emotional support movies like your favorite movie. You just put it on when you're feeling sad and helps you fall asleep and relax. Legend is probably one of them for me.
[00:17:17] Steve :
Let's see. You could have, I mean, at that point, you know, you you could have, like, emotional support, rare first edition books that you demand to be given to you because, you know, that's that's what homes you emotionally. That's what provides support. Yeah.
[00:17:42] allen marcus:
Keep keep it on your bed stand at night?
[00:17:45] Steve :
My emotional support gun collection.
[00:17:49] allen marcus:
I'm still alive because there's books I wanna finish reading. Mhmm. It makes you it makes you feel safer. Mhmm. Makes life worth living. I still got things to do, having a goal. So maybe these goals are emotions for animals.
[00:18:05] Benjamin Balderson:
So all underwear have, like, the little cuppies in the around the balls Mhmm. So they don't stick to the inside of your thighs when it's hot. I I you know, because that's that's a very emotionally traumatizing thing when you when you're, like, sitting in in public and now your nuts are stuck to your thighs because it because only a couple underwear company have figured out to put a little flap of cloth around there to cradle your balls. And and I just feel like there should be something done about
[00:18:37] Steve :
that. Like, you should have your balls cradled more or there should be more underwear?
[00:18:43] Benjamin Balderson:
No. Definitely more cradling of the balls.
[00:18:45] Steve :
Right. Okay. Okay.
[00:18:49] Benjamin Balderson:
Yeah.
[00:18:50] allen marcus:
Is that another labyrinth reference? I got my emotional support David Bowie over their eye. Yeah.
[00:18:57] Benjamin Balderson:
I I figured it went with it it went with the labyrinth reference. Unfortunately, my oldest daughter is at that perfect age. That labyrinth was one of the movies that came out that I had to watch 839,000 times in, like, a 6 month period. Mhmm. And I would stab David Bowie right in his face. Right? You you sing a song about the babe one more time, motherfucker. I have to hear that the babe song one more time. I will kick you right in your ding ding. You know, that's that's alright.
[00:19:29] allen marcus:
And Labyrinth is a perfect film. There aren't very many. Labyrinth is one of them. One flaw was labyrinth, and I will admit this. It's that scene with the, the fire head guys where they're taking their heads off, and they're all getting flamed and deadheading? That that I could do without. That one is just I've it's terrifying.
[00:19:50] Benjamin Balderson:
Oh, you found it.
[00:19:53] Steve :
That's fair. That's fair.
[00:19:55] allen marcus:
I put dishes in the kitchen.
[00:19:58] Benjamin Balderson:
Oh, you're amazing.
[00:20:00] allen marcus:
Thank you, Christy.
[00:20:01] Steve :
His wife's not home.
[00:20:06] allen marcus:
There was an argument that emotional support animals are in many ways for some people, a cope for not having a husband or a wife or a significant other. I think that's a legitimate argument for or against animals is that they were I would almost state that they're,
[00:20:24] Benjamin Balderson:
cope for not having children and such. Mhmm. Because the more people that I see that have those don't have kids or responsibilities, and they're like children themselves, and they baby those animals to a degree that I've never seen. Like, everybody I know that has little dogs, those little dogs shit all up in their house and piss all over the place and like Yeah. You know? And they're just like, oh, it's it's cute. It's cute. Like, what the hell?
[00:20:57] allen marcus:
Indeed. And that's kind of one of the arguments against giving emotional sport animals validation just kinda willy nilly is that some of these people, if they are so emotionally stunted and agoraphobic and in no condition to take care of themselves, then it's not gonna turn into a a Turner and Hooch situation where having a a mastiff in your house is gonna somehow get you out of the house and walking around and training and walking the dog and exposure to the world and just improving on all aspects of your life. If you're so far gone that you really can't even leave your house to see a doctor about getting an emotional support animal letter, then it's gonna be more of an emotional drain on the animal itself. So it might not be fair to the animal to be such an emotional burden.
[00:21:57] Steve :
I mean, that yeah. I I don't I don't know if there's any way to make a, like, broad brush statement that that is necessarily even the case, and especially if you're trying to replace spouse as opposed to children. I do agree that there's way too many people that run around and call their pets their fur babies, and they're just rancid little pork dogs. Like, not, you know, not even the size of a real dog. Like, the the healers are small. They're still real dogs. But,
[00:22:38] Benjamin Balderson:
it I suck at this.
[00:22:40] Steve :
I I do think I do think that it can go the other way. I mean, anecdotally, I've seen men whose wives died, who got dogs, who lived another 40 years. Ben, then when, you know, outlived, like, a couple of the dogs. But the dog went everywhere with the old dudes. You know, the dog would fucking, like, allowed in the coffee shops and shit like that in town because that dude went for fucking coffee to that one spot every year for fucking, you know, the his entire time there was a coffee shop in that town. And fucking, yeah, they're definitely keeping them alive for sure.
And, like, active and, you know, relatively, you know, smiling about it. Sure. This is all And then also engaging with people every day, which is the one thing that, like, a lot of old people don't get to do a lot is engage with a variety of different people and, you know, several close friends on a regular basis.
[00:23:54] allen marcus:
And that's my number one argument. If I were to take the position of being in favor of the expansion of emotional sport animals in American culture, and it does seem to be an American culture saying, I don't know that other countries are all like, hey, man. Emotional sport animals are the are the key role to, you know, the world's problems of just, suffering and human existence and nihilism and existentialism. Just get a dog. Just get a cat.
[00:24:24] Steve :
Yeah. But that's the same. I mean, people say that American innovation is is extinct, but here we are discussing some good old fashioned American ingenuity right now.
[00:24:36] allen marcus:
Well I mean Yes.
[00:24:38] Benjamin Balderson:
I mean, the whole emotional support thing, I think, is kind of a, you know, a nonsense thing. But on the same token, myself, obviously, I live out in the freaking woods with a shit ton of animals. For me, I don't understand the world's thing where they don't have animals around. That's weird to me. So, you know, I am I am I I would be for a culture where animals were more openly accepted. Like, I I could care less if a guy walks in with a fucking dog as long as the dog's well behaved. I don't care. Or a cat or a peacock or a turtle or whatever they wanna hang out with. I don't care. A 7 year old runner. You clean up after it, and you yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Animals are more well behaved than kids most of the time.
Mhmm. But, yeah, the the you clean up after your animal and make sure it behaves right, and I don't really see a problem other than that myself. I mean, you you ever, read about, Tyke, Tycho Brahe? The, he was a fairly famous, astrologer. He had a pet moose. He used to take the bar with him and get drunk. And the damn moose got too drunk one time and fell down some stairs and killed itself. Like, he had a damn drinking moose he hung out with. Oh. Like, I don't know what you know? I that sounds just cool to me.
[00:26:09] allen marcus:
Dick you killed your fucking Was Tycho Brahe in a urban area? Was he on a on a university campus where it was real close knit, community where there wasn't a whole lot of space for people to run around. We get these urban environments
[00:26:28] Benjamin Balderson:
where Listen. If you've ever seen freaking the Hobbit series and the battle of the 5 armies and you see what the fucking elf king does when he comes rolling in with the big old moose. Uh-huh. How what you want me to go to a college campus and have to go deal with them and not have a moose? I haven't made it past the,
[00:26:49] allen marcus:
the Hobbit series part of the movie where they're having 2nd and 3rd and 4th breakfast, but they're singing about it. That was Lord of the Rings. No. That was the Hobbit film, the first Hobbit film, and they had some breakfast scene, and they're all singing and dancing about all the food they're eating. And that just went on for an hour or 2 or 3, and I was like, yeah. This is this is Peter Jackson's
[00:27:12] Benjamin Balderson:
or the rings, Hobbit. Now you gotta watch the 5 armies, and you gotta watch him with the moose. And you gotta understand that if I was confronted by an army of college children, I would
[00:27:22] Steve :
I would expect to have a moose. Yeah. It would be nice definitely nice to have battle moose. It would. Yeah. You're not wrong.
[00:27:33] allen marcus:
Yeah. The the battle moose in Minneapolis?
[00:27:35] Steve :
Right.
[00:27:36] Benjamin Balderson:
And if he gets drunk with you, how do you beat that?
[00:27:41] Steve :
You always got a buddy. Right?
[00:27:45] Benjamin Balderson:
That's what I'm saying.
[00:27:48] allen marcus:
Concrete jungle.
[00:27:51] Steve :
Dude.
[00:27:53] allen marcus:
And that was sort of the conversation I started in the little private chat to say, hey. Let's talk about animals. Let's talk about emotional and sport animals and the limitations of having said animals in modern day 15 minute city urban setting. Where do they fit into, like, agenda 2030?
[00:28:15] Steve :
Well, there's I've, you know, been a consistent push for to make sure that every pet is spayed or neutered. They don't you know, they're already trying to drastically reduce, the amount of the I mean, even, like, the made to order puppy mill places are, you know, running leaner. So there's that. There's it's getting harder and harder and harder to rent a place unless you have that doctor's letter. You know, if you if you have a if you already have a pet, you know, it's significantly harder to get anywhere at least right now, with 1, you know, without, again, without the letter. Right.
I had the fake papers saying Gomez was an Argentinian dogo. Do you hear that, Tier?
[00:29:19] Benjamin Balderson:
You hear that meat head? You're a dogo. You're a dogo, you big meathead. Dogo daddy. And is there some discrimination
[00:29:27] allen marcus:
against dog breeds in your is it county? Is it
[00:29:31] Steve :
Oh, the this was to get into the apartment complex in Vegas. I haven't had to worry about it since. Okay. But but, yeah, I mean, I've been trying I've been looking at a couple of different spots, because my girl's place is super tiny. And, yeah, dude. It's not easy finding anywhere that's, like, pet friendly period
[00:29:54] allen marcus:
around there. If we were if we were having a proper heated debate, we'd probably wanna find a landlord who's just had properties destroyed by Oh, for sure. Animals who weren't who weren't properly looked after, who weren't given a big yard to run around, who weren't brought for walk every morning, this type of thing. It's not. And that is where we can get into the the meat of the matter here. And I do have a little quiz for you guys. Under the Fair Housing Act, the FHA in the United States, individuals with disabilities are allowed to have emotional sport animals, ESAs, in their housing even in properties that have a no pets policy.
As long as they provide appropriate documentation, such as a letter from a licensed health care provider. However, there are 2 primary exceptions where a landlord may refuse to accommodate an emotional support animal. What are those two exceptions?
[00:30:56] Steve :
I would imagine if it's already a currently banned dog breed.
[00:31:04] Benjamin Balderson:
Maybe HUD home? Hub HUD housing?
[00:31:10] Steve :
I don't know.
[00:31:11] allen marcus:
Those are your final answers? Do you need to phone a friend? This friend doesn't have a clue. If you are the weakest chain in the link, your dog will get through the gate.
[00:31:25] Benjamin Balderson:
The answers are I don't know. I I don't know enough about emotional support animals because it's different rules that I have to follow.
[00:31:34] allen marcus:
Right. So under the Fair Housing Act, and we'll have to verify this with a lawyer for sure. But the answer I got was an undue financial burden. So if accommodating the emotional support animal would impose an undue financial burden on the housing provider, they may be able to refuse a request. This could apply in situation where the animal causes significant damage to property or requires extensive modifications that would be financial financially prohibitive for the landlords. So if the landlord can state that having to
[00:32:08] Benjamin Balderson:
modify the property in some way for the landlord you tried to come in with an emotional support giraffe,
[00:32:15] allen marcus:
like, they're like, no. We can't fucking put arched roofs up to support It it may be like that or it may just be that the landlord doesn't wanna add doggy doors or something. It might be Yeah. Or
[00:32:28] Steve :
doggy doors. Yeah. Like, a fence all the way around. Mhmm. Might just have a might just have a back fence. You know? Yep. That's not gonna fly. If there was a pool that got grandfathered in that didn't have a separate fence or, you know, barrier around it, that would have to come in. Mhmm. Yeah. I mean, there's a bunch of ways that it could What if you had an emotional support dolphin?
[00:32:56] Benjamin Balderson:
You know, Jana was trying to get you to have an emotional support cock. Somebody did have an emotional support cock, and they tried to get onto a plane with it. Mhmm. That probably didn't go well. No.
[00:33:06] allen marcus:
It was a stunt. It was a publicity stunt.
[00:33:11] Steve :
And It was orchestrated by Jana.
[00:33:13] allen marcus:
You know, these social media accounts of animals, famous animals, have gotten out of control. That was kind of a trend, maybe 2017, 2018. Yeah. But now I think it's it's cooled down a lot. You know, Instagram has changed its policies. Facebook Meta kinda owns that thing. They're instituting new policies for teenagers to say that this is a teenager on account. Maybe a little bit too late. But as soon as that happens, it's completely jumped the shark. No one under the age of cool wants to be on these social media platforms anymore because their parents and grandparents are on them, that type of thing. I do have the answer to the number two reason that a landlord could say no. No. I have What was the number 1?
Undue financial burden? Undue financial burden on the landlord and the housing provider. And the I'm not a patient. The other reason is a direct threat to health or safety. So the presence of the emotional sport animal
[00:34:15] Benjamin Balderson:
poses a direct threat to the health or safety of others. The landlord may refuse to allow the animal. Like, half of what was said about one seemed like it was, like, almost like something you could only determine in a post situation, not pre. Like, I you know, how do you know that the animal's gonna tear the place up or whatever? Like, how would you know any of that? Well And how would you know if the animal's gonna be attackful or something and
[00:34:43] allen marcus:
pose a danger to the person? How do you know? Well, you set up a doggy date. It's like my dogs meet your dogs. We're gonna go to the dog park. We're gonna walk around. The landlord's gonna pet and feed the animal and get to know the animal and develop a relationship. And if it doesn't work out, then the landlord can say, no. I just don't think this is gonna work out. So after presenting the letter from the primary care physician, and I have the code that the billable health insurance code for that. If you guys want that, I have that handy. If the landlord meets with you and the animal, because you have to present the animals that are gonna stay. If it's more than 1, well, then the landlord could probably say no.
That's too many animals. You can have one animal registered to stay with you.
[00:35:37] Benjamin Balderson:
Or what if your what if your significant other also has a support animal?
[00:35:41] allen marcus:
Well, then it's probably one animal per person, but the landlord can always refuse and say no. If you as the emotional support animal owner say, I wanna challenge this, then you'd probably have to lawyer up or something to that effect. But just because someone has an emotional sport, animal, letter from a primary care physician or a therapist, the landlord can still refuse, and then you have to go and and work that out legally. I don't know how you do that.
[00:36:23] Steve :
So no emotional support alligators?
[00:36:29] allen marcus:
Probably probably not. Oh. Because if if they're small and they fit into an aquarium, they're gonna grow large, and then they're gonna get flushed down a toilet at some point, and then they're gonna show up in the sewers.
[00:36:48] Benjamin Balderson:
How how if it got that big, how were you flushing it down the toilet? Right. That's a fair question. Well, you flush it before it gets larger than
[00:36:56] allen marcus:
the largest stool you've ever dropped. That's really that's really the other concern a landlord might have is saying, you know, that dog looks large. Looks like it eats a lot and leaves a lot behind. And what is your policy or rather what is your technique of picking this stuff up?
[00:37:22] Steve :
The, like, semester I was in college, I knew these dudes that lived in the next dorm over, and they had an alligator in their little, like, teeny tiny ass fucking dorm room, and they wound up getting busted. I I don't see how they couldn't have. You know? The thing stunk. Yeah. Donk.
[00:37:47] Benjamin Balderson:
That room indoor turtle?
[00:37:49] Steve :
That room was funky.
[00:37:52] Benjamin Balderson:
Mhmm. Was it like a turtle?
[00:37:54] Steve :
It was I mean, it was a motherfucking alligator, Ben. And once it got to, like, 3 and a half feet,
[00:38:01] Benjamin Balderson:
which mean the smell. Was the smell like people that have because I've because every bite I've ever known that you wanna If you wanna turtle If you wanna that room, you're like, what the fuck? If you wanna multiply that by, like, several times and add a meat diet
[00:38:16] Steve :
to it.
[00:38:18] Benjamin Balderson:
The meat diet was the real cherry on top with that. That meat diet really makes things like you can shit out vegetable stuff, and it's only so bad and goes away. Mhmm. Meat diet, like, that's gonna that's that's some funk. It'll anger.
[00:38:36] Steve :
Is it a anger? Anger longer. Mhmm. Any of the OP and Anthony people listening right now. But, yeah, dude. So when they they caught the guys, it got turned over to the university system.
[00:38:56] allen marcus:
Did it become a science
[00:38:59] Steve :
specimen for I'm sure I'm sure it did. I'm sure it did. I'm sure they get let it get a little bit bigger and then fucking yep.
[00:39:08] allen marcus:
So a lot of people wanted to make the claim that there were studies that proved the benefits of having animal animals for therapy in regards to emotional disturbances, distress, trauma, grief, all the categories of conditions that would be emotional and mental and these types of things. So to say that animals alleviate some of that concern is anecdotal. But in terms of having studies, actual reproducible scientific studies published in psychiatric and medical journals, there aren't very many for a number of reasons, including the fact that there's too many different animals. There's too many different people, too many different conditions, and there's no money involved because Pfizer doesn't want you to have a dog. They want you to take the pills forever.
[00:40:07] Benjamin Balderson:
I mean, I can't deny that an animal makes you feel better. That's just a fact. Mhmm. But I do concern that why is everybody, so emotionally traumatized? Like, is this you know, if this is just you playing a hot game to get a dog into your apartment, cool. But if you're all this traumatized, like, you maybe shouldn't be putting it on an animal. I don't know.
[00:40:35] allen marcus:
Yeah. Yep. And to have that, you know, crutch, and this is sort of where we get into the ableist language and people are gonna attack from either side to say, you know, you're getting unemotional about this. You're not empathetic to say that it's unfair to certain animals to have to be roommates for some of these people who it's this is where we have to be judgmental, and we have to say, I've been to Magic the Gathering tournaments. I've been to certain situations where, you know, Super Smash Brothers is the priority. Showering is not this type of thing. Anime conventions. There are certain people who just haven't taken the social cues to recognize that, you know, this may be the one time a year you put on a costume and you go out to a party and you walk through a hotel and you're just having lots of fun due to your inability to recognize your own aroma, people need to say, hey. You know what?
You're just not living like a human being. You're living more like a beast of burden here. And someone needs to tell you, you know, you're going through a lot of internal struggles, this sort of exposure therapy to get you out. It's it's great. You're making friends. You're communicating with people. But you know what? At some point, you have to just realize that this is not this is not a safe space for you. The world at large is not going to hold your hand along the way and sort of accommodate you. So there's this idea that some handicaps, some disabilities are visible and others are invisible within the realm of the invisible handicaps, these types of things where people might self diagnose or just not feel like they are properly prepared to put on a clean pair of underwear, tie their shoes, and walk outside their door to get their mail or to pay a bill or a basic adult skill.
This is a long winded way to say that if someone is to get an emotional support animal, the question the follow-up question would be, what is your plan? What is your goal? And how long will it take for you to overcome whatever it is, challenge or adversity you're facing to then realistically get back in the game? And if it this is a college setting, an academic setting where, you know, you take a semester off because things are just not going well, but eventually you gotta get back into the game, you gotta attend classes, you have to graduate, The college isn't gonna house you forever. This type of thing.
The world is not a college. The world does not have academic advisors and support staff. At some point, if in America, every adult or over 50% of adults require emotional support animals, they require certain medications to put them to sleep and to wake them up at night. Is it even financially an option to continue
[00:43:53] Benjamin Balderson:
to allow Do we have a statistic on the number of adults that have support animals?
[00:44:00] allen marcus:
It's it's not a category that has real numbers yet. Service dogs
[00:44:08] Benjamin Balderson:
are probably registered. There's probably a database for that real numbers for that. Yeah. No. There's there's absolutely a database for service dogs. Right. It's, digital because Mhmm. I get a thing every month that re ups my, digital thing that, keeps track of my dogs and everything.
[00:44:32] allen marcus:
Yep. And there are many websites that will claim to assist a person in getting a letter or a registry or something for emotional support animal. The problem with that is it's not a legal document. So one of the websites I looked at, and I'll have to bring it up here, find it again, it basically says in its fine print that it it's not it doesn't matter. It's not a real thing. Mhmm. They have to say that in fine print because it's an it's a dotorg website. But on the bottom, it says what does it say? Looking for it here. Like, esaregistration.org.
And then it says there that ESA owners let's see. Registration ESA registration of America is not a government agency and is not affiliated with or endorsed by HUD, the Department of Transportation, or any other governmental agency, registration of an emotional sport animal with ESA registration of America does not give you any additional legal rights, but esaregistration.org will sell you merchandise and maybe a fancy looking certificate to hang on your wall. Oh, that's nice. But just like a leather bound Trump bible that you put your hand on and you swear allegiance to the flag of America, you know, it's just a decorative thing. Mhmm. Yeah. It's got no real actual authority. Right. But if you walk around with an official looking letterhead, something that looks like it was printed like a college certificate or some sort of fancy looking thick hemp paper with some real ink, nice colors on it, you walk around with that. You show that to TSA. You show that to everybody when you have a weird animal walking around with you. They might look at that and they might say, you know what? I'm not even gonna question it. Just let the guy go by. But at some point, you're gonna get challenged.
[00:46:42] Steve :
Yeah. Yeah. Usually by the, lady at the counter, right before you board a plane. Mhmm.
[00:46:57] Benjamin Balderson:
Where did you guys keep going with that porcupine?
[00:47:00] Steve :
Right. Right, sir. Sir.
[00:47:03] allen marcus:
Are you referring to literal drug drug mules at border crossings? She's got a latex gloves on, and she's like, you know what? I have to check your orifices. I'm not checking a donkey's orifice today. No entry. Refused. Not stamping your passport today.
[00:47:24] Steve :
That's looking checking is her night job. Right.
[00:47:29] Benjamin Balderson:
3 o'clock in the afternoon. That's why you have to wait for a hurricane to get them donkeys smuggled in.
[00:47:36] allen marcus:
Yes. Yes. The I forty went out. I was on the I forty, and then it turns out the best way to smuggle in drinking water to the Carolinas is pack animals.
[00:47:52] Steve :
Mhmm. I saw that video. Those guys are alright.
[00:47:58] Benjamin Balderson:
Yeah. It's very contrary to the people that say our things couldn't have been built with horse and buggy and the new technology can't do it then yada yada. And then when everything goes to crap, you see a bunch of guys with donkeys doing the job like, That's interesting.
[00:48:19] Steve :
Well and helicopters, but, yes, also donkeys. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Helicopters are handy.
[00:48:26] allen marcus:
Saw videos of the helicopters hovering over and just causing disturbances of of the donated goods and just really stirring things up?
[00:48:38] Benjamin Balderson:
You know what? That's what Blackhawk helicopter pilots do. Mhmm. I was in the army for, 6 years. And, like, anybody that's been in the military, like, you set up your tents. Those dickheads just come and knock them all down for no apparent reason. Like and they think it's funny, and you can't really say anything to them about it. They're all everybody that flies those things is a freaking officer, and you can't say anything. And they just do that just for the fun of it. So I don't really know that that was a special thing that they did for them. They do that to everybody.
[00:49:13] allen marcus:
They're dickheads. I had a pretty high rank in Call of Duty Modern Warfare, so I'm pretty established in modern warfare tactics. Actually, I have a headset, and I talk to my friends. We we kill the other team dead. I I don't. I don't do that. It's like the opposite of emotional sport. Animals are, like, 13 year olds on Xbox Live.
[00:49:38] Steve :
Lots of hand bombs.
[00:49:40] allen marcus:
Mhmm. So that would be my recommendation is, you know, get your kid a headset, an Xbox Live subscription, and just get them to play some of these shooter games, and they will be emotionally stirred up and exposed to all sorts of worldliness. And they will have to man up real quick.
[00:50:00] Benjamin Balderson:
After that, they can watch faces of death. Oh,
[00:50:07] Steve :
good lord, man. That was hectic back in the day.
[00:50:12] Benjamin Balderson:
Dude, these kids wanna talk about traumatized. You didn't watch faces of death when you were 17 by some friend that was a douchebag that brought it over. It's like, you gotta see this. I'm emotionally fucked up for the rest of my life after watching this. Now you will be too.
[00:50:28] Steve :
Oh, dude. Yeah. We were like, I don't know, 12, 13, something like that. Maybe 13, 14. The when we that shit was playing at the fucking party that we weren't supposed to be at in the first place. Yeah. But, yeah, I remember just being like, what the fuck? Not being able to and then I had a friend whose older brother brought, the rest of them home from the nonblockbuster video store. It was the local video store.
[00:51:05] Benjamin Balderson:
The one that had the porn backroom.
[00:51:07] Steve :
I don't know if they had a porn backroom or not. Like, they shut down before I got old enough to, like, really want to go look for any kind of porn room.
[00:51:15] allen marcus:
And that's maybe a a separate debate, but I will say that I think it was the movie gremlins or something when they put an animal in a microwave. It's not even a real animal. It's a gremlin. You put it in the microwave. People are Mhmm. A little upset that this was a parental guidance suggested film, the PG rated movie. I think at that point, maybe that was the point. They did microwave 1. It exploded in the microwave. It was it was all green. It was gross. Was that the tipping point, though, for for culture to be a little bit more protected?
[00:51:47] Steve :
The the never ending story was like a PG rated movie. That shit was traumatizing as hell.
[00:51:53] allen marcus:
Well, to be exposed to an emotional situation that was about death and the loss of an animal leads to another point that I have in my document about maybe a concern we'd have. If someone is emotionally stunted, they get emotional service animal, and that emotional service animal is not taken care of and then deceased, now you wake up to a dead dog in your bed, is that going to be the end
[00:52:25] Steve :
the end of your therapy? It's just over? You're gone? No. Those people probably go right out and get another dog right off the bat.
[00:52:34] Benjamin Balderson:
It it it's not like the egg from high school. They'll just get another egg and put a dot on it. It's like that. Yeah. Thought it was a a sack of
[00:52:43] allen marcus:
flour. A heavy sack of flour. You didn't have to carry it on like an actual baby. An egg is just a little bit too small.
[00:52:52] Benjamin Balderson:
You guys had to do a sack of flour?
[00:52:55] allen marcus:
Well, yeah. It's more like baby shaped. Okay. So you'd have to put on your back or you you put it on your chest. Right? You have to try to breastfeed the the bag of flour.
[00:53:10] Benjamin Balderson:
You guys really went all out with it, man. They just wanted us not to break the egg for a week. Yeah.
[00:53:16] allen marcus:
Right. So so men have to experience what it's like to be a woman, and then you have the the thing you put on with the breast, and then you have the little baby bag, and then you put the flour, and then then you gotta pretend to breastfeed in public to be exposed to that shame. Yeah. And then pretend to breastfeed in public to be exposed to that shame.
[00:53:30] Steve :
You didn't have to do that? I did not go to that school, man, and I did not.
[00:53:35] allen marcus:
Well, maybe it didn't catch on.
[00:53:38] Benjamin Balderson:
Holy smokes, man. You know what? I knew that there was way too many Kamala Harris signs in Minnesota.
[00:53:45] allen marcus:
No. I think that was, like, governor Tim Waltz thing where he was just wanting everyone to experience. What was this thing about football?
[00:53:56] Steve :
He got to hang out with young boys. Yeah. Something about playing football together.
[00:54:02] Benjamin Balderson:
Did you guys see yet the thing coming out where they're, apparently, they're about to nail Tim Waltz with a Mhmm. A bunch of Chomo, a bunch of child molester freaking
[00:54:14] Steve :
I I also saw some really I also saw some really convincing debunks of that coming from the right, not not even coming from the left. I'd he looks like, short eyes.
[00:54:30] allen marcus:
He does. Some poo poo eyes? Yeah. Got all that extra white space around his eyes. It's like, don't shoot till you see the whites of his eyes, then you see Tim Waltz showing up with crazy eyes.
[00:54:43] Steve :
Yeah. I mean, he looks yeah. He he looks like he's got those peto eyes for sure. I mean, he acts like a freaking clown.
[00:54:50] Benjamin Balderson:
Well, if the supposedly, the one guy that's saying it's saying that he has definitive, Mhmm. You know, things that he can say that if you had not seen Tim Waltz's genital area, I'm presuming, you would not know about. And so if that makes you that's pretty, you know, if it's not, then it's just BS. But if it's true,
[00:55:18] Steve :
No. Yeah. Yeah. There there's only a couple of weeks left till the election. Thank blonde haired, blue eyed, perfect baby Jebus. Can't wait till this freaking nonsense is over.
[00:55:34] Benjamin Balderson:
Dude, this is this has been the growth one of the grossest things at elections. Like, I'm just I I don't anybody that isn't suffering from apathy at this point, I don't understand where you are.
[00:55:54] Steve :
Dude, it yeah. And it's not it's not even apathy. I just I I want people to shut up.
[00:56:01] allen marcus:
We're talking about something else. I need a political support animal to help me get into lying to receive my ballot on election day? Because I'm just just terrified. I don't make the wrong choice. And if I choose the wrong president
[00:56:18] Steve :
So that's, that's an election day game. Because you know everybody who brings their emotional support animal to the polling station is a Harris voter. So that's one way we can be
[00:56:33] Benjamin Balderson:
Dude, I except for if you showed up with, like, an election day Wolverine and then accidentally lost control, that'd be great. That would be great.
[00:56:47] Steve :
Right? That you just shook the box the whole way there. Fucking didn't even get out. Just chucked it right into the freaking emotional support dog crowd. Oh my
[00:57:05] Benjamin Balderson:
god. She just watched it just fucking just go psycho like a damn berserker just tearing dogs up left and right.
[00:57:14] Steve :
Oh, man. That's brutal.
[00:57:18] allen marcus:
Some of the lines in Saint Paul districts to vote were crazy long, and these people have to just wait in line just to get into some church and their little district just to go living in Saint Paul. Right. They get what they deserve.
[00:57:39] Benjamin Balderson:
Yeah. Nobody with sense lives in Saint Paul.
[00:57:43] allen marcus:
You know, I'm thinking we could just take over the state fairgrounds, just start living there, turn into an autonomous zone, turn into a ranch, you know, bringing all the horses, all the ponies, all the all the pack animals. And a moose for Ben. Don't forget that. Well, we do have Yeah. Coffee, so we'll have to have some cariboos with coffee cantinas.
[00:58:08] Benjamin Balderson:
Right. Remember that gorilla at the Minnesota Zoo that would break out and go beat people up? The big purple one? Yeah. K I think his name was Casey. We should invite him.
[00:58:18] allen marcus:
Oh, Casey already lives there.
[00:58:21] Benjamin Balderson:
Yeah. We should we should we should go help him break out again.
[00:58:26] allen marcus:
That would that would be great except that I don't know that the organizers of the Minnesota State Fair really respect animals because there were cows, I think, that were gonna be milked, but then they had to have that situation squashed. And they brought in, you know, replacement cows that were not real cows to give milk and medications. Yeah. They were cow it was, what, a cow pox or cow flu or something Oh, wow. Concerned about. Yeah. The the treatment of animals in urban areas is a real big concern. There's just not enough space.
[00:59:06] Benjamin Balderson:
Well, it's that you know, I'm a I'm even a vegetarian. Mhmm. And those PETA people are fucking crazy. They have never been to a farm. They have no idea what things are or how they operate. Like, some of the pictures you see them post, and they're like, oh my god. Look at this. You're like, look at what? If they don't even know what the hell they're talking about. Like, I remember I saw one where they had a machine where they supposedly were rape inseminating sheep. And I'm like, nobody in the world does that. You don't even get enough money from a slaughter lamb to to justify the kind of money that that would take when you can just go buy a buck and stick it out in the field, and he'll take care of the whole thing for you. You ain't even gotta worry about it. Like, there was something scientific going on there. Like, that had nothing to do with a normal farm. It it's just absolutely ridiculous.
[01:00:02] Steve :
Yeah. No. They're crazy. They they are. Stone cold cray. Yeah. I I will I don't know. So, I mean, it basically, everywhere I I am aside from Vegas, is a a small town. And if there's not a ton of open space immediately out of my front door, it's within, you know, a walk or 5 to 10 minutes of a drive, sometimes 20 minutes if we wanna go to, like, Mount Tam or something like that. But, we're like, when here in Sonora, there's a whole giant freaking open park right around the corner. And even when I was in Vegas, we'd go out to the desert, 3, 4 times a week where it was just like miles and miles and miles of hiking in fucking the middle of nowhere.
And then, yeah, you know, I've got yeah. There was a empty vacant lot across the street from the apartment complex. I'd take him and my neighbor's pit bull. Shout out to Medusa and,
[01:01:18] Benjamin Balderson:
go throw a ball. They were always the most excellent pictures. Of course, they had Gomez in them, and he is one sexy boy. It's true. He's
[01:01:29] Steve :
a freaking beast.
[01:01:32] allen marcus:
A lot of these Midwest communities have multiple pet parks in town. They don't have many skate parks. I've been driving through Montana. You might see a few skate parks, and then they'd have a billboard about meth awareness. But I don't know that people in Montana are so concerned about emotional support animals. It seems that the anecdotally, anyway, it seems that stereotypically, it's probably California, probably maybe New York, maybe some of these larger cities where people are having a lot of stress. They're really stressed about life and financial concerns. So my question then was in terms of having an invisible disability and needing an emotional support animal and not having an income and having many, many, many 1,000 of dollars in debt, who's gonna foot the bill for the organic dog food that these support animals are gonna require?
[01:02:42] Steve :
Oh, no. They're first in the Soylent van.
[01:02:46] Benjamin Balderson:
You think Soylent Green is people.
[01:02:50] allen marcus:
Are are they feeding soy lattes to their to their puppy dogs?
[01:02:54] Steve :
Oh, wow. I hope not. That would be awful. That would be. I've I okay. I've seen I've seen dogs kind of try to go for coffee drinks, but they usually aren't into them. There's something about coffee that doesn't it's not super appealing. I do have video of, one of my ex's chickens drinking my coffee, though. That was pretty funny.
[01:03:25] Benjamin Balderson:
We have to fight the cats off. The cats like coffee.
[01:03:29] allen marcus:
Cats like coffee.
[01:03:32] Benjamin Balderson:
I don't I don't drink coffee, but Christie is consistently fighting with the cats about her coffee. She does put a substantial amount of cream in her coffee. Might be it, and Steve is the one that taught me the gloriousness of of cream and coffee. So thank you, Steve. Quite welcome.
[01:03:50] Steve :
You gotta put it in first, though. You gotta put it in first.
[01:03:55] Benjamin Balderson:
Explain that to me.
[01:03:57] Steve :
There's a chemical reaction that takes place at both ends when you pour, you know, cream in the coffee. And if you do it first, it, like, melts away some more of the acidity to it.
[01:04:13] Benjamin Balderson:
Uh-huh. Okay. You're gonna have to hang on because I can't hear you over that. Okay. Go ahead. Okay.
[01:04:18] Steve :
Yeah. When you pour it in first, it, like like, quite literally helps absorb a lot of the acidity
[01:04:25] allen marcus:
as opposed to when you pour it in afterwards even when you stir it. Well, you you deflated my debate there because I was gonna I was gonna bring up the concern about the pH level and the acidity of adding, you know, milk or dairy product to coffee, and that would be a huge concern. But you're telling me somehow, scientifically, magically, you put the cream in there first. Mhmm. It stirred up real nice. 100%. Hot coffee in there,
[01:04:48] Steve :
and it just has a chemical reaction. You're you're supposed to pour coffee between, like, 206 and 208 degrees. Mhmm. Okay.
[01:05:00] allen marcus:
Okay. So that might answer my question that I had also about the emotional sport animals because I feel real anxious and nervous after having a half a cup of coffee, and I just start getting jittery. And if, you know, that rubs off on the animals, if they get nervous too, if I'm just talking too fast because I had a cup of coffee because I went to a a kit kitten cafe in Japan, and they served me coffee. And they had cute girls in, you know, schoolgirl or whatever the French maid costumes and, like, that really that fabric is really just stimulating, and it's just, like, overstimulating. And I just keep talking about it, and then they try to sit you down and calm me down. They put a kitten on your lap. I just pet the kidney and drink the coffee. And it's like I've never even been to Japan, but I've dreamed about it my entire life. I posted about it on Reddit, and then can I get an emotional service item?
It makes me feel better that way.
[01:05:48] Steve :
Well, I hope it works. I do. I do. I hope it works. It's it's the fantasy that
[01:05:53] allen marcus:
that keeps keeps me living, and that's really really what we're doing in in podcasting. It's a dream that someone's gonna one day listen to this and leave a comment on the page. We had that conversation earlier about people were quitting the podcasting game to become bartenders and waitresses.
[01:06:11] Benjamin Balderson:
Mhmm. Yeah. Brian, Steve. We
[01:06:14] Steve :
Probably pays better.
[01:06:16] allen marcus:
It probably does.
[01:06:22] Benjamin Balderson:
I love it. He's definitely making more money.
[01:06:26] Steve :
There's there's not definitely not a a ton to be had doing the kind of show that, you know, we do.
[01:06:36] allen marcus:
The the top dogs on Patreon, they're getting the big bucks from from Patreon supporters. This is where we're talking about value for value now, and we, digitally busk and ask for for not donations, not for tips, but for value.
[01:06:51] Benjamin Balderson:
That that there there's a there's a reason that, rich and famous are 2 separate words.
[01:06:58] allen marcus:
Thought that's a country music artist.
[01:07:01] Steve :
I thought that was big and rich.
[01:07:03] allen marcus:
That's the guy. Yeah. I think so. I don't assume his gender.
[01:07:08] Steve :
I think so. Sam Treppoli has a jelly roll joke in his special.
[01:07:16] allen marcus:
Jelly roll was that's the guy who testified alongside Dee Snider
[01:07:21] Benjamin Balderson:
with the Gorn Ponder. That's the guy who sings, eighties bar music and pretends like it's country. We're not gonna sing.
[01:07:29] Steve :
And he also used to rap or still does. Something like that.
[01:07:34] Benjamin Balderson:
Dude, the rap country thing, that drives me insane. Can't stand it.
[01:07:40] Steve :
Yeah. No. It's pretty terrible. It's yeah. Yeah.
[01:07:45] allen marcus:
Sturgill Simpson's good, though, so that helps. Could maybe get an emotional sport quail or something that just coos.
[01:07:52] Steve :
Right. I would like to get an emotional support 1919 Martin mandolin. That would be nice. A mandolin? Like, an instrument? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. As long as we're just, you know, get a doctor to write me a letter. Mhmm.
[01:08:11] Benjamin Balderson:
I feel like I should blame this on the BC boys, though. Mhmm. Like, they they were the first ones. They, like, did rock rap.
[01:08:19] allen marcus:
Right. So I'd like to register my base guitar as an emotional support instrument. Mhmm. Whenever I play a rock me like a hurricane, it just calms me down for some reason. Right. Right. Puts you in the zone. That was my college roommate. He's a marine Semper fear. Alright. Hoorah or whatever it was. Uh-huh. He'd bring out his emotional support base and just stir everything up. Alright. He'll rock you like a hurricane over and over again all afternoon. Made him feel real nice.
[01:08:51] Steve :
Alright. Alright. I mean, he he could have had an emotional support drum kit.
[01:08:58] allen marcus:
Yeah. Okay. So do I have to get a letter for having a GarageBand license
[01:09:03] Steve :
if I'm gonna rent an apartment? If you live in a place with yeah. I was gonna say if you're in an apartment or somewhere with an HOA. Yeah.
[01:09:11] allen marcus:
The the noise complaint.
[01:09:14] Benjamin Balderson:
But, I mean, if you're in a garage band, aren't you supposed to have emotional issues?
[01:09:20] allen marcus:
Like, if you're gonna be successful at it. Grunge. Yep. That's the whole the whole grunge genre, probably.
[01:09:29] Steve :
Man, a lot of the there's some very, very, very, suspicious deaths that came out of that era and a couple of people who just really like drugs.
[01:09:43] allen marcus:
And because of that trauma, there's a whole generation of people needing emotional sport animals to deal with. Right?
[01:09:49] Steve :
You're not wrong.
[01:09:52] Benjamin Balderson:
So Are you saying Courtney Love created emotional sport animals?
[01:09:57] Steve :
Dave Grohl.
[01:09:59] allen marcus:
Dave Grohl. Mhmm. The Foo Foo Fighters. Yeah. The Foo Fighters.
[01:10:03] Steve :
Yeah.
[01:10:05] allen marcus:
Like, I am concerned about my labs and alien abduction, so I need protection animals. And little green and gray men from probing me every night.
[01:10:16] Steve :
And a Russell Brand amulet. Did you see that commercial?
[01:10:22] allen marcus:
Russell Brand. I feel like he's gonna be walking around with a dove at some point. His whole history of Guaranteed. He's full on ready to larp being Jesus Christ.
[01:10:33] Steve :
Oh, I did 100%. But, yeah, the the Ambulance commercial is hilarious. I'll I'll I'll if you haven't seen it, I'll put it in the Telegram group later.
[01:10:43] allen marcus:
Have you seen Ambulance too? Brand get me too ed and just, like, rubber balled it. Just, like, it just, like, bounced right off and he's also video too. Ben, he's going hamlet too style, the whole rock me sexy Jesus thing where this former drug sex addict, Russell Brand, is now somehow sexual emotional release Jesus, where he's baptizing other men in pools. In his skivvies. In his tidy white in tidy whiteys. The holy fellas with another fella in him freaking me on these. Right. Yeah. Culture is
[01:11:21] Steve :
quite weird. It is Face of the Christian right in America. That's what cracked me up at their little Zionist Woodstock that they did a couple of weeks ago. Right. The griftapalooza there. When it was a Canadian, Jordan Peterson, dressed up like 2 face from Batman. Okay. And Russell Brand, a Brit, dressed up like a 19 eighties, San Bernardino used car salesman, and they're leading the little revival there to Trump rally in in prayer. It's like, how much more blasphemous could you possibly get where you've got 2 people that aren't even from this country lecturing the audience about rescuing the republic?
[01:12:09] allen marcus:
Right. Yeah. So Jordan Peterson is prepared to sell you a $40 a month subscription to Jordan Peterson online university. It's gonna be better than Arizona online or Full Sail University or any other education, PragerU, you know, just pray for PragerU because Jordan Peterson University online, $40 a month subscription, is gonna give you That seems cheap for a Benzodiazepine
[01:12:33] Benjamin Balderson:
addiction.
[01:12:36] allen marcus:
Right. He's got a guy in Mexico now. He's got elearning courses. So you're gonna, you know, watch videos and get certifications for life skills from Jordan Peterson who wears multicolored vest, not quite like Joseph, the dream interpreter from the bible here, but you'll probably hear about all sorts of biblical lessons from Jordan Peterson and celebrity guest Russell Brand by giving him $40 a month. That's the future of college education, everybody. I'm a Canadian professor who professed that he was confused about pronouns and wouldn't stand it anymore. So that's where we go with emotional support animals, pronouns, danger hairs, enabling the
[01:13:23] Steve :
Emotional support, manosphere.
[01:13:25] allen marcus:
The children of society. And that was that's really the concern, and I've stated this before already. The You know what? He man had thunder cat, Steve. Yeah. That, 3 non blondes. What's going on? We never got an answer to that question. They've been asking him what's going on. What's going on? The,
[01:13:49] Steve :
that was the trigger. There was this TV show called Sense8 that was basically, like,
[01:13:56] allen marcus:
a DMT trip. Was was that a Wachowski production? I don't know. I think it was. I'm not sure. Might have been.
[01:14:06] Steve :
But it was, like, heavy on some predictive programming, in a really trippy way. But these people got activated to be able to communicate telepathically with each other and, like, locate each other and stuff like that.
[01:14:21] allen marcus:
Mhmm.
[01:14:23] Steve :
It when this DJ put on what's going on by For Non Blondes and with a a techno beat to it, and that's what triggered their their abilities.
[01:14:41] allen marcus:
It's a American Ultra movie.
[01:14:44] Steve :
Yeah. Kinda.
[01:14:46] allen marcus:
That that theme persists as far as Wachowski's next project, the Wachowski brothers, nay, siblings, now sisters.
[01:14:56] Benjamin Balderson:
Right. Tusk's sisters.
[01:14:59] allen marcus:
Probably working on, a film script involving someone who wants to unalive JK Rowling, I think is the the last I heard of what they were working on.
[01:15:14] Steve :
Alright. Okay.
[01:15:17] allen marcus:
Well, good luck, ladies. And I believe it. It's 2024. I've read stranger headlines in that.
[01:15:24] Benjamin Balderson:
There was also a d Dude, I just I heard today that there was a third attempt on Trump. I mean, are you fucking serious? Well, okay.
[01:15:33] Steve :
No. That doesn't really seem to be the case.
[01:15:38] allen marcus:
The Eagle hasn't landed?
[01:15:40] Steve :
Well, in the first place, the he was he got 2 misdemeanor gun possession charges. He bonded out on 5 grand. He's like a freaking, what is it? He has a a organization called, I think, America Happens. Uh-huh. He ran for office in Nevada, like, a year and a half ago. Did this happen on indigenous people day and how disrespectful that would be? Oh, that would have been a bummer. Right. Yeah. His name is Vin Miller. And, the lady that is his partner in the America happens thing is this forever candidate in Nevada named Mindy Robinson. And I actually met her once, I think, at Freedom Fest. Freedom Fest.
[01:16:29] allen marcus:
Yeah, brother. Freedom Fest.
[01:16:31] Steve :
And, oh, dude. It was hysterical.
[01:16:35] Benjamin Balderson:
Are you saying this guy killed Dennis Hoff?
[01:16:39] allen marcus:
Allegedly. Are you making allegations?
[01:16:42] Steve :
No. No. I'm not.
[01:16:50] allen marcus:
That's funny. So if we get this monorail back on to Epcot Center to Disney World, the strangest place that you might expect to see an emotional and sword animal is probably in a courtroom setting. So there were discussions as to whether or not allowing witnesses on the stand to have an animal, a cat or a dog, maybe even a teddy bear, would influence the jury in some way or another. And there was concern about allowing, you know, an animal into the witness box with the witness who's giving a testimony and how that might influence a jury decision. What do you guys think about that?
[01:17:35] Benjamin Balderson:
Well, in the last actual debate I was in, my cat was on my lap, and I unbeknownst to me, every time I would talk, the cat would go and then, like, go like that at the camera. Right. And I was told specifically afterwards that they would debate me, but they would not debate the cat.
[01:17:58] Steve :
That's pretty funny.
[01:18:00] Benjamin Balderson:
Yeah.
[01:18:01] Steve :
That's good good stuff. Yeah. I I I think I think that there's a potential to have an impact on a jury, but there's also I mean, they go to great lengths to dress witnesses in a specific way to influence the jury. They're, you know, the both experts and, you know, people that are called the witness to the witness stand get to varying degrees coached to the point of training. You know, the expert witness is a profession.
[01:18:39] allen marcus:
Did those people have conferences and shit? So, like, if Monica Lewinsky was advised to wear a dress with a stain on it so she could stay up stand up and show the stain that she's wearing Mhmm. That'd be better for her case then?
[01:18:54] Steve :
Maybe. Maybe. She's she seems to have, you know, done just fine.
[01:19:00] allen marcus:
Well, we have Court TV and all of these trials.
[01:19:05] Benjamin Balderson:
Dude, it's the last time you tell Johnny Depp. We need to get a hold of Monica. Mhmm. We are missing out on a gold mine with the Monica Lewinsky Blunt Wraps.
[01:19:15] allen marcus:
Right. Okay. So in that trial, who was the woman who had the the nose job done and she had the big makeover?
[01:19:27] Steve :
Jen not Jennifer Flowers. Jennifer no. Wait. You're talking about, Susan Allred?
[01:19:36] allen marcus:
No. No. There was
[01:19:39] Benjamin Balderson:
I was trying to write a rap song about it. I have to check my notes later. How are we supposed to keep track all the all the hoes that Bill Clinton was sleeping with? That way Right. Allegedly.
[01:19:48] allen marcus:
Allegedly. So if he wants to dress like a peacock
[01:19:53] Benjamin Balderson:
definition of the word is is? ISIS.
[01:19:58] allen marcus:
Terrorist group. It's there's the known knowns and the known unknowns and unknown unknowns, and there's Donald Rumsfeld and every bush in between Mhmm. Allegedly.
[01:20:11] Steve :
Are you gonna care? Where are you going?
[01:20:16] allen marcus:
I'll go sit beside them. I don't care. Having an emotional support put me out there. Wife in your life is really beneficial.
[01:20:24] Steve :
Mhmm. For sure. I can't wait to get back to my girlfriends.
[01:20:31] allen marcus:
Have you ever been to a wedding with emotional support animals?
[01:20:37] Steve :
Yeah.
[01:20:38] Benjamin Balderson:
Are those bridesmaids?
[01:20:47] Steve :
Yes. They are.
[01:20:49] allen marcus:
Are they, though?
[01:20:52] Steve :
I mean, for the bride, yeah, for the most part.
[01:20:56] Benjamin Balderson:
Also for the other dudes.
[01:20:59] Steve :
Right. Right. That's funny. They're they're all cousins.
[01:21:11] Benjamin Balderson:
Our debate is not very debatish this week. We are trying to get things together. Marcus just got home. I am not yet home. I will be home next week. We will have something more fiery and, more lined out for everybody next week, but we wanted to get something back going here this week.
[01:21:32] allen marcus:
Yeah. This is our exploratory sort of brainstorming session where we have to come up with a contrived topic that's gonna, engender, you know, gender discourse and controversy and puns, lots of puns. Of course, people love that. That's how you win a debate with with humor and laughter. And the person who can present the most funny argument sincerely will probably win the audience admiration.
[01:22:05] Steve :
That's fair.
[01:22:07] Benjamin Balderson:
It's a charisma
[01:22:09] allen marcus:
and the way you you speak with confidence.
[01:22:12] Benjamin Balderson:
It's certainly not the intelligence of the argument. In fact, you you learn quickly as soon as you're as soon as you debate. If you step over the intelligence bounds, you're you're gonna start losing really quickly. If you make too smart of an argument that they can't make that leap, then nobody's following you. You have got to tailor it down like the newspaper does.
[01:22:42] Steve :
Yeah. No. That's I you're you're supposed to try especially if you're trying to persuade people. You're supposed to speak at, like, a 5th or 6th grade level.
[01:22:54] allen marcus:
Yeah. It's the Donald Trump way of using his words. He has his bob and weave technique where he'll just throw out 5 different ideas, and he'll talk about them. And then you'll circle back to his main points over and over again and then he'll do his little dance and then he'll have his ear attempt and then he'll do something grandstanding and then you'll feel real good about it and you'll go home and and buy that leather bound bible and all the Trump coins that you can find with King Cyrus's face on it, and you learn a little bit about geography too along the way. Where is the Middle East anyway, and why is it in the middle?
Is that the center of the world?
[01:23:35] Steve :
Right. Well, there's, you know, the Far East. Mhmm. So if there's a Far East, there's got to be,
[01:23:50] allen marcus:
a Middle East. Right? Far far east to me is like, you know, New York. Like, the Atlantic Casino
[01:23:58] Steve :
because I live in the Midwest. Yeah. I think they were talking about China.
[01:24:04] allen marcus:
China. Well, I just dig a hole. And if I keep digging, I'll eventually emerge in a golf course in China. Right? Isn't that how that works? I will be a little gopher, and I'll see Bill Murray there and everything anyways. That's true. Is Bugs Bunny the best ever emotional sport animal?
[01:24:25] Steve :
He could be. He could be. Although, I would think that having Foghorn Leghorn as an emotional support animal would be downright hilarious.
[01:24:38] allen marcus:
So now we're gonna You probably wouldn't have a bad day. Do you guys have Not not Speedy Gonzales,
[01:24:43] Benjamin Balderson:
but his cousin?
[01:24:45] Steve :
Slowpoke Rodriguez.
[01:24:47] Benjamin Balderson:
Slowpoke Rodriguez. That is got to be the best emotional sport animal. You can't tell me that dude is not got some awesome Now we're ready to debate you. I'm ready to debate
[01:24:58] allen marcus:
what is the most famous and best emotional sport animal. I'll present the argument that the most famous emotional emotional sport animal is probably Winnie, a golden retriever who gained widespread recognition as the emotional sport dog of the late US senator John McCain. When he was often seen accompanying McCain during his night in the senate, he became a symbol of comfort and companionship during his battle with cancer. So shout out to Winnie helping John McCain along the way.
[01:25:32] Steve :
I would prefer to congratulate the tumor. Yeah.
[01:25:43] allen marcus:
Remember when, Colin Powell died of colon cancer? Yeah. In a prison cell in South Africa, and then everyone forgot about it.
[01:25:54] Steve :
I In a prison cell at South Africa. I don't remember that part.
[01:25:58] allen marcus:
Yeah. He was right there with Gandhi. They were on a hunger strike together Oh. Because of the colon cancer Yeah. That that Colin Powell died of. Yeah.
[01:26:09] Steve :
Yeah.
[01:26:10] allen marcus:
I think he was the leader of the Black Panthers.
[01:26:16] Steve :
I don't have it in front of me in, at the 3rd Eye Carnival in Pueblo a few months back. I don't think it's set up on Puebla.
[01:26:27] allen marcus:
Puebla.
[01:26:28] Steve :
Puebla. Puebla. Charlie Robinson gave me a a copy of one of his books. And on the, you know, on the inscription, he wrote, Steve, thank you for inviting me to your Black Panther party.
[01:26:46] Benjamin Balderson:
Yes.
[01:26:47] Steve :
Yeah.
[01:26:50] Benjamin Balderson:
What kind of for governor. Panther party.
[01:26:56] Steve :
Yep.
[01:26:58] allen marcus:
The old gump. Do you guys have any information about the, racial division between Honey, I'm already know. Dog owners, emotional support animals. Is it really white people who have the highest percentage of service dogs?
[01:27:15] Steve :
I would I would say yes, but only because barely, you know, majority population. But there are lots of old Mexican ladies who have emotional support dogs. There's lots of black women that have emotional support dogs.
[01:27:38] Benjamin Balderson:
And love to have Do you think if you think percentage wise, it's about equal that that that you you do see more white people with them, but that's just because per capita, we're we're more white as a country.
[01:27:51] allen marcus:
Yeah. I think white is just a louder color. Yeah. Just stands out. White white and proud. Okay. Okay. Even white. Are we gonna debate this? Whether you're white or not? Yeah. I'm trying to get my white balance correct on my camera. See, this is white. This is me. I'm not white. This is white. This is me. We'll white balance our cameras, but that's a racist thing to say. So we need a neutral facial tone, our cameras, I guess, to, like, zero it out or something.
[01:28:30] Steve :
Yeah. No. I don't know.
[01:28:36] allen marcus:
I was in college, and I woke up one morning, and I walked outside, and I saw posts on a door, some white privilege poster. One of the privileges of being white was having a band aid that was a neutral skin tone. I I learned something that day. Okay. That as a white guy, I could buy a band aid and I could put it on and it would be invisible in my skin because it was I will. It matched my skin tone. I'm on a show. I thought they did skin tone Band Aids for, like, 20 years now. They do now. They do now. I went to college a long time ago. Back when colleges were colleges and universities are universities, and we we understood the difference.
[01:29:16] Steve :
Okay. I remember when the town I grew up in, it changed from Anderson College to Anderson University.
[01:29:26] allen marcus:
Was there a Cooper in between it?
[01:29:28] Steve :
Was what, who,
[01:29:29] allen marcus:
Was there a Cooper in between the Andersons? No. No. Uh-uh. So it wasn't like a CNN?
[01:29:36] Steve :
No. It's a Church of God. Not not like a journalism school? No. It's a Church of God University.
[01:29:45] allen marcus:
Okay.
[01:29:46] Benjamin Balderson:
The one that gets me is is some of the bases that you drive now by now that are Space Force bases instead of Air Force bases.
[01:29:56] Steve :
Mhmm.
[01:29:59] Benjamin Balderson:
Like Vandeburg or whatever.
[01:30:03] allen marcus:
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's, that's a good debate point about what commander in chief will lead us into the space race in the best possible way. But my concern is those astronauts, they go through a lot of stress. And do we have animals prepared to travel with them to Mars?
[01:30:24] Steve :
Right. They better.
[01:30:27] allen marcus:
They better. If we don't have packed mules packed up and ready to go to Mars to call in as I just don't I just don't see how those those buggies are gonna are gonna do on the dunes.
[01:30:39] Steve :
Yeah. The Mars rover doesn't have much on, a mule train.
[01:30:46] allen marcus:
No. It's gonna run on fuel at some time.
[01:30:51] Steve :
Right? Especially, yeah, dude, or battery or whatever.
[01:30:57] allen marcus:
I don't know what I don't know if there's even a debate about electric vehicles anymore. I think the debate is over. No one wants them. Yeah. They all Yeah. All the recharging stations in my town have an out of service sign written on them. So there's no place to charge because no one bothered to repair it because no one had an electric vehicle that needed to be charged anymore. I mean, there might be a few targets that have charging stations in the corner of the parking lot where someone will park their Tesla there just to show off. But I think that debate has already been won. When, when,
[01:31:37] Benjamin Balderson:
with whichever rental place what it was, it had, like, a third of their fleet was electric, and they fucking they x those out and said, nope. Going back to gas. Like, when that happened, you knew that the electrics were dead. That it there was nobody gonna be buying them. I was at a dinner party talking to a guy who worked for an electric company,
[01:31:59] allen marcus:
and he told me about a time when they had a demo electric vehicle for the electric company. One of those ladder trucks where they have like the what do they call them? They have little little box that you sit in and it raises it up. A bucket truck. A bucket truck. Okay. We'll call it an electric bucket truck. This thing had to be charged up, and they had it on a tow truck or a trailer or something to drive it near the location. And then they got it off, and they drove it into the demonstration. And they drove it back, but it was a complete farce and and fake because the thing could not travel the extended distance required to go across state lines to demonstrate to a bunch of investors, people who are gonna make the decisions to buy more electric bucket trucks for the electric power companies.
And in the case of these emergencies where these category 11, these hurricanes have been turned up to 11, and they've done a lot of devastation. And now mules are the best options, but electric bucket trucks for power companies are not adopted anywhere. It's completely failed. No one wants them. They don't work. And if electric car companies cannot appeal to electric power plant conglomerates to convert at least half of their fleet to electric bucket trucks, then we have a real problem here, boys. The problem is electric vehicles exist and no one's buying it. And Tesla stocks are plummeting, and SpaceX wants more launches, but their attention is diminishing.
No one cares about Dragon Rocket launches. So what future do we live in? I need an emotional support animal to lead me into 2025 because all my dreams are crashing.
[01:34:09] Steve :
We did an article, I don't know, either earlier this week or last week, but they're doing, like, AI friends, and they're doing, it's like it's like half a Furby, that's, you know, connected to a large language model. Mhmm. And it's their lead it's, like, half a stuffed animal, half a robot, and that's your your friend. That's your emotional support friend. So to an earlier point when we were talking, that could be another way that they start to, you know, limit, reduce the amount of, actual pet ownership.
[01:34:59] allen marcus:
Okay. So it's going to a Furby model. Now I would like to see some of these Furbies placed in microwaves. Those videos would provide so much, consulment to my soul just to see people putting in iPhones and blenders,
[01:35:18] Benjamin Balderson:
Smash Furbies connected to Wi
[01:35:22] Steve :
Fi. Here, I'll I'll show you the article. I'll bring it up. Smart Furbies connected to Wi Fi to access large language. Basically, this is, like, today's fucking,
[01:35:31] Benjamin Balderson:
Catholic priest that that Steve's fucking Steve's picture is hilarious.
[01:35:42] allen marcus:
Cassio made a free
[01:35:44] Benjamin Balderson:
robot designed to cuddle and calm you down. Its own simulated personality and emotions as it enter as you interact with it and can learn to recognize its own. Yep. See, there's no way that that's not taking in downloads and patches and shit like that. No problem. All the time. All the time. Like, this thing is literally the Catholic priest, of today. It's gonna listen to all the things your kid says. This is Like a smart television
[01:36:12] allen marcus:
remote control waiting to hear your Siri Amazon Alexa requests. It just has a wind, a wind filter. You know, those microphones that have wind filters on them, those fuzzy wind filters. That's what that is to me. I see that. Yeah. It does look like a Star Trek Tribble. It does look like a Star Trek
[01:36:34] Benjamin Balderson:
industries. That's nice.
[01:36:37] allen marcus:
That's nice. $398 for, Club Mufflin. Yeah. Put that thing in on my I never heard of it. A a a a a startup called Vanguard
[01:36:51] Benjamin Balderson:
Industries. I've never heard of Vanguard before. Wonder if they're associated with anybody.
[01:36:57] allen marcus:
This thing looks a little bit like the owl from Labyrinth, and I do have my emotional support David Bowie doll standing by. But this thing this thing is not handling my balls tonight.
[01:37:10] Steve :
Right.
[01:37:11] allen marcus:
Not allowing that. I do not consent.
[01:37:13] Steve :
Unlike your life-sized statue of David Bowie.
[01:37:17] allen marcus:
Yeah.
[01:37:18] Steve :
Totally handling your balls tonight. Just in the corner. He just sits there and watches.
[01:37:24] Benjamin Balderson:
Well, I just I just back comb the hair, fluff her. I mean, I do approve of the idea of David Bowie having to be a cock. Like, if you like, what if
[01:37:34] allen marcus:
There is no dance magic dance happening with this mofflin in my bedroom is what I'm saying. That little charging coffin.
[01:37:46] Steve :
Right.
[01:37:48] allen marcus:
Does it come in black? Can we make it in an actual
[01:37:51] Steve :
sarcophagus?
[01:37:53] Benjamin Balderson:
That is so weird.
[01:37:56] allen marcus:
Emotional support robots from Casio from Japan.
[01:38:00] Benjamin Balderson:
Maughlin? Yeah. Study. Stop. Study. Japanese people are so weird,
[01:38:16] allen marcus:
but they're so
[01:38:42] Benjamin Balderson:
I would kill him. I I would But that's not good at anything. Delete as an adult if I thought I got all of a lot of new It's an idea. To feel better about myself. What
[01:38:57] Steve :
What what, Ben?
[01:38:59] Benjamin Balderson:
If I had to carry this around as an adult to feel better about myself, I would self delete. Like, I've been in person friends with both of you, and if I if you saw me doing this and you didn't help me, self delete, I'm holding you accountable.
[01:39:20] allen marcus:
Could I say, Mufflin, play Gojira? Would it play music for me? Maybe. Is it connected to my Spotify account? Could I say, hey, Mufflin, play delivering dog face 2. It's episode 11, emotional support animals. Would it know to do that? Better.
[01:39:40] Steve :
It it better.
[01:39:43] Benjamin Balderson:
It wouldn't be very supportive if it if it didn't.
[01:39:47] Steve :
So that's where that's where the emotional support animal is going to
[01:39:53] allen marcus:
Ugh.
[01:39:55] Benjamin Balderson:
Furby. Dude, what kind of a self respecting adult is gonna nuzzle with a freaking fuzzy
[01:40:03] allen marcus:
fake animal? A Disney adult might.
[01:40:07] Steve :
Yeah. 100%. Mhmm.
[01:40:10] allen marcus:
Hashtag adulting, Twitter, x users would probably
[01:40:15] Benjamin Balderson:
buy a blue check. I mean, on the bright side, these people are typically not reproducing.
[01:40:21] Steve :
I'm guessing, like, 97% of the staff at Google and Adobe. Anyone who works for Mark Zuckerberg, they probably already have them.
[01:40:34] allen marcus:
Yeah. I got one right here. So a lot of these YouTubers now use these microphones, these RODE microphones, and they just, like, wear them on a necklace. It's it's a big windscreen. It's like a feather duster windscreen. I already have one. Okay. And I can use my imagination and just have a great time pretending. I can pretend all I want that this little windscreen microphone cover is my emotional sport animal. I could probably take this on an airplane, might get a few strange looks, but you know what? I've seen stranger behavior on airplanes. I've seen men raw dogging on airplanes. Me, I'm not gonna raw dog. I'm gonna take some furry stimulating fabric that I can just put in my hands and just rub along my face.
It'll comfort me. It'll soothe me. And it only cost me a couple dollars. I don't need to spend big bucks on some smart wifi connected device to have a large language model to chat with me connected to an app on my phone. This is like I just want the flaps on my underwear that make it so my balls don't stick to the sides of my legs. Okay.
[01:41:45] Benjamin Balderson:
Then it it's all good after that. It's some fresh socks. Man, we've had telethonic
[01:41:51] allen marcus:
technology for years years years, and these Japanese people are trying to sell us the same device and then make it unintimate and unsexual. We're going in reverse here, folks.
[01:42:05] Steve :
Well, I mean, I think they they got it the other way too. I do. I Do they? Yeah. We've investigated. Unblunt force wisdom, we've investigated. It's been a while. Yeah. I guess that is a step up from selling drawers in the vending machine.
[01:42:27] Benjamin Balderson:
Yeah. Yeah. If they if they'll if they'll if they'll buy used drawers in a in a vending machine, you know that their little stuffy animals got, like, a secret hole in the back somewhere.
[01:42:39] Steve :
Or like a vibrate setting?
[01:42:41] Benjamin Balderson:
Yeah.
[01:42:44] allen marcus:
Yeah. But we began the conversation talking about strange tongues and strange places and unexpected licks unless that muffin what was it called? Mafflin?
[01:42:57] Steve :
Mafflin. Mufflin?
[01:42:58] allen marcus:
Muffler? I don't know what it is. It doesn't have a it doesn't have a muffler. Gonna be like connecting to the Wi Fi. It doesn't have a wet 70% of mufflins were s 8 today.
[01:43:11] Steve :
The Maughlin Rights Organization pops up.
[01:43:22] allen marcus:
You know, I'm okay with giving Furby licenses to people who need emotional support animals. I think that's a step in the right direction. These animals are going to look at the face of their owners and realize, wow. This is not great. I wanna reincarnate quickly. Please take me to a dog bark behind the shed and just leave me there forever. End me now. My owner is emotionally narcissistic and taking all my marbles away from me, not not leaving me alone at all. Please think of the animals who have to be forced to be emotional support animals for Disney adults who need too much. They have too many needs, and those emotional sport animals are milked dry. There's nothing left to them.
Please, please think of the animals.
[01:44:25] Benjamin Balderson:
Nobody wants to live with the danger here.
[01:44:28] Steve :
Of an angel. Angel. I was gonna hear,
[01:44:32] allen marcus:
sir, McLaughlin from the grave chiming in.
[01:44:37] Benjamin Balderson:
For just $2 a week, we could help free a poor suffering animal from living with a danger hair that nobody else would live with. It run to let these animals suffer when they have crazy women lording over them, forcing them to listen to their stories?
[01:45:03] allen marcus:
$2. I do realize this is an unlicensed live stream conversation. We have a few people in chat. We do have listeners, so our prayers have been answered.
[01:45:18] Steve :
Oh, shit.
[01:45:19] allen marcus:
People are listening to this nonsense. This is kind of a this is kind of a t ball debate. We're debating with training wheels on. We're testing the grounds of our our debate skills, our charisma levels are increasing. We've been away from from strange furry microphones.
[01:45:37] Benjamin Balderson:
Marcus and I got sucked up in a hurricane. We're just now getting back. It's true.
[01:45:43] allen marcus:
There was a hurricane, and it did rock me. It did rock me. It rocked me. Rock me, Amadeus. It was a classical hurricane in the true sense of the word. It was very operatic. I come home. I listen to the news, and some guy on television describes the hurricane as being tornadic. And that was traumatic for me to hear a newscaster coin a new word describing a hurricane as being tornadic and having tornadic conditions. The hurricane was misidentified as being like a tornado. Anybody ever used that word before, tornadic? Have you heard that? It's not fair
[01:46:27] Steve :
to hurricanes. It's not fair to tornadoes. There were 3 the I mean, there's a bunch of different videos of tornadoes touching down prior to the hurricane making landfall.
[01:46:40] allen marcus:
Was it a sharknado?
[01:46:42] Steve :
Yeah. It was we had running odds on AM wake up, but, I don't think we ever got definitive proof one way or the other. Okay. I did see where an alligator, like, washed into some dude's freaking screened in porch.
[01:46:58] Benjamin Balderson:
That would be a hell of a wake up. You step outside to let the dog out, and there's a fucking alligator in your fucking enclosed porch. Mhmm.
[01:47:07] Steve :
Yeah. Yeah. It was like, I don't know, like, bottom of the shin high water that they were walking through, like, in their house.
[01:47:19] allen marcus:
It'd be embarrassing if you have to go to school and you've grown a couple inches and you're wearing those high water pants because you just don't have longer pants because you grew you had a growth spurt. Right. And that's really what we need to encourage in these Disney adults, emotional growth spurts. Just grow a little bit.
[01:47:36] Steve :
Mhmm.
[01:47:38] allen marcus:
Yeah. No. Danger hair Disney adults with emotional support animals have annoyed everybody on the Internet for far too long. So it's time to call them out
[01:47:50] Steve :
for what they are. They've also annoyed everybody at the DMV for far too long.
[01:47:55] Benjamin Balderson:
And you know what it takes to feel sorry for people at the DMV?
[01:48:04] Steve :
Dude, is it my last run-in with a Disney adult was at the DOV. Were they working there? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You could see into the office. Okay. Yeah.
[01:48:17] allen marcus:
And, They have all their Funko Pops on their desk. All the freaking,
[01:48:22] Steve :
like the dude, there was, a couple of different, like, you know, dolls, stuffed animal things. Right. There were Funko Pops. There were some posters. There was a wall of what looked like it might have been, like, ticket stubs or passes or something like that.
[01:48:41] allen marcus:
Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yep. That's kinda what teenagers do. Every every concert is a new experience, and every Taylor Swift era is something that they wanna celebrate. Again, these are behaviors of of teenagers. We have a separation, we have a right of passage to make into adulthood, and having an emotional service animal is not the same as having a summer spent at a dude ranch and becoming a man.
[01:49:11] Steve :
That's fair. That's fair. Although, I wouldn't advocate that for the women. But
[01:49:17] allen marcus:
Well, you know, I think we can accept women at dude ranches. It is 2024. Okay. It's very inclusive of you. And that's really my biggest argument for expanding the legal parameters of emotional sport animals and making it far more legitimate because of that community aspect. It really is again the empathy of having an animal and the responsibility. And I'm basing my entire entire argument on 2 films, Marley and Me and Turner and Hooch.
[01:49:55] Steve :
You never actually saw Marley and Me.
[01:49:58] allen marcus:
I saw the trailer, and I learned everything I needed to know.
[01:50:04] Steve :
They gave it do a lot of people make fun of that movie. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Turner and Mooch was, what, Tom Hanks on run amok?
[01:50:17] allen marcus:
Right. Right. Yeah. And there's that movie where he had an emotional support mermaid.
[01:50:24] Steve :
Oh, yeah.
[01:50:26] Benjamin Balderson:
And really that's probably Yeah. But that's when he was making the transition from the really pervy, weird, tranny comedian to Yeah. Like, wholesome guy.
[01:50:37] Steve :
Mhmm. Yep. Yeah. Well, they'll give you wholesome guy if you put on the dress first.
[01:50:45] Benjamin Balderson:
Yeah. Yeah. The bosom buddies. The bosom buddies. Mhmm.
[01:50:53] allen marcus:
Yep. Is that really what we're getting at here is, generation of Disney adults who are not breastfed at all? They didn't have a loving mother, and now they need to replace that sort of loving motherly instinct with an animal. And, men and women, they both wanna be moms. Is that what it is? I was breastfed, so I'm good to go. I think I think that's that's really what it is. And and the key is to be best fed for just a a perfect amount of time, not too long. I mean, there's some teenagers who are still being breastfed by mothers, and that's just that's just too long. You gotta cut the nipple off at some point. I mean, not physically, and I mean, not literally. Not really. Wow.
Right. But just just just say no no more.
[01:51:42] Steve :
I'm not sure I understand what that means, m s.
[01:51:46] allen marcus:
Are Disney adults expected to do the same things as what the majority does? Are Disney adults expected to have the rights of passage that men and women go through, I don't think we have any expectation for people who call themselves Disney adults. Right. Its whole existence is working at a fake email job, an insurance company, some sort of social media manager somewhere so that they can earn enough money to see Taylor Swift perform at Disney World once Medical billing and coding. Yes. And I do have that code if you guys are ready to write that down. Let me see here. I'm just against these people voting. That's all I'm saying. Mhmm.
[01:52:32] Steve :
Yeah. Well, that's the you know? Yeah. I mean, we do then. Ryan. They they they they should not be allowed to move. That's what I'm saying. They have jobs. They pay bills. They occasionally pick up after their emotional support animals. Yeah. You know, they they go to Whole Foods or Trader Joe's.
[01:52:54] allen marcus:
I have that code. Are you ready to write it down?
[01:52:58] Steve :
Sure.
[01:52:59] allen marcus:
The current procedural terminology that's, registered as capital CPT code 99213 as maintained by the American Medical Association. It's a medical procedural code under the range established patient. Established patient code, 99213. You show that to your provider as an established patient for an office visit or other outpatient visit involving evaluation and management. This visit involves a low level of medical decision making and or the provider spends 20 or more minutes of total time on the encounter in a single date. So you need about 20 minutes with a medical professional, and you might bring in a dog or an emotional support animal to introduce it to the doctor to state your case. And if the doctor likes you and the dog, he will use his letterhead and sign a signature on a piece of paper saying that, yes, you do have a an invisible condition, an invisible handicap condition that is recognized by the doctor and the prescription.
The solution to this is going to be having an emotional service dog, and then you can show that letter to a landlord. And if the landlord likes your dog, then he'll allow the dog and you to stay on his land. That's really what it comes down to. It's all medical billing and the sort of legal structure to allow a classification of an animal from a family pet into an emotional service And
[01:54:40] Benjamin Balderson:
All's I'm saying is I have an invisible medical condition. They're mental.
[01:54:46] allen marcus:
Mhmm. And you have a registered service dog?
[01:54:51] Benjamin Balderson:
Yeah. It's not an emotional support dog. It's a service dog.
[01:54:57] allen marcus:
What are the differences in the training requirements to become a service dog as an actual dog, not as a human who is in service to another human? That would be, like, a collared thing.
[01:55:10] Benjamin Balderson:
Well, like, mine mine has to react to me getting ready to have a seizure.
[01:55:14] allen marcus:
Mhmm.
[01:55:16] Benjamin Balderson:
And then when I'm having a seizure, it has to protect me because, obviously, I'm not particularly people wanna come over and help, and they really just leave me alone. Like
[01:55:31] allen marcus:
And the dog prevents humans from interacting with you during that time. So he's trained to recognize that you're in a vulnerable position and needs to protect you from other humans who wanna be extra helpful. And is there a label on the dog? Does he have a vest? Is he Yeah. Marked clearly that he's a service dog? Yeah.
[01:55:55] Benjamin Balderson:
He does. Meet Ed.
[01:55:57] allen marcus:
Hey, meet Ed. Do they wear reflectors or high visibility gear? So that Yes. They go in the dark?
[01:56:04] Benjamin Balderson:
Yep.
[01:56:06] allen marcus:
They're clearly seen, and they're working, so they're not they're as, an animal in a petting zoo.
[01:56:15] Benjamin Balderson:
And then also, they get their own little IDs and everything.
[01:56:21] allen marcus:
Registered tags, legal documents, all of that ready to go. Yeah. That's a real thing. That was one of the arguments against Yeah. Confusing emotional service animals with emotional support animals with registered service animals because it would kinda blur the lines. Okay. You're showing us identification tag card laminated thing with the there's a picture No. It's a hard card. It's not laminated. It's like a hard one like you're doing. There's a photo ID of the dog on the card. Yep. Okay. So you can't just print one out, and land it and make a fake ID for a a service dog?
[01:57:16] Benjamin Balderson:
Yep. And mind, this guy's registration number on it, his breed. It mandates that this animal and owner have full access to all public places. Full act full access required by law for me. And then on the back, it says, have questions? US Department of Justice Civil Rights Division. Civil Rights Division. Talk it out with them.
[01:57:45] allen marcus:
So it's your civil right and duty.
[01:57:48] Benjamin Balderson:
Yeah. And then mine see to verify the animal's registration number, scan the QR code, or visit, service animal registrar.org.
[01:58:04] allen marcus:
Now I'm suspicious of it being a dotorg and not a dotgov. It's not it's not a government thing. There's an organization. Is this a legitimate thing?
[01:58:14] Benjamin Balderson:
Yeah.
[01:58:18] allen marcus:
Okay. Well, that wins the debate then. That was convincing. Convincing. It was. Yeah. Just some confidence behind that, and I believe you. Chad wants to know, are dogs able to have a conceal and carry license?
[01:58:41] Benjamin Balderson:
Yeah. Tear's got Tear's packing heat. He's packing heat.
[01:58:46] allen marcus:
It's like, cat bar cast. Yep. And, conceal and carry for, these nuts.
[01:58:54] Steve :
Yeah. Right.
[01:59:00] allen marcus:
It's back to, bomb sniffing dogs because your dog's bomb.com.
[01:59:05] Steve :
The Go Man's doesn't really conceal. Neither just fear for that matter. Pretty much open carry with with those guys. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
[01:59:17] Benjamin Balderson:
He's pretty proud.
[01:59:19] Steve :
Well, I've seen, like, dog vests with, with holsters, though.
[01:59:30] Benjamin Balderson:
Those are pretty John Wick movie?
[01:59:34] Steve :
I guess so. I don't know. I didn't see it.
[01:59:37] allen marcus:
Are there secret service animals secretly in service?
[01:59:42] Steve :
Oh, for sure. For sure.
[01:59:48] Benjamin Balderson:
Tears don't got no special things like that on it. It's just, that's not tier. That's Issa. They all kinda look the same. Racist.
[02:00:01] allen marcus:
Tier, Issa, service dog. I can read that. That's legible. That's a big bold font. Service dog high visibility.
[02:00:11] Benjamin Balderson:
White text on black font. Yeah. Now you got the the handle back here and a thing. And There's a meathead. I meathead. Everybody loves you.
[02:00:22] allen marcus:
Yes. Everybody loves you. It's really those those puppy dog eyes that just kinda calm everybody down.
[02:00:30] Benjamin Balderson:
Hi, Biggus. Good. Talking about you, Biggus. He is sleeping. He's a pit bull. That's what they do.
[02:00:44] allen marcus:
I'm so right. It's been a real NPR evening for me too. Real talk radio. Love it. Pretty calm and very emotional and supportive of of of both of you get both of your dogs tonight. We have some art. We have some new art. I don't know that anyone listening will see the art, but we'll we'll make the art more visible.
[02:01:06] Benjamin Balderson:
And we'll get you guys a good hot debate next week. Hopefully, we can get a guest so it's not us debating each other.
[02:01:15] allen marcus:
We're just gonna get you the back rubs and high fives tonight. That's fine. It's the bro down, throw down.
[02:01:25] Steve :
Right.
[02:01:26] allen marcus:
It's not a verbal combat, but we'll get there. We've got some anger directed towards some ortho Yeah. Wally said he'll
[02:01:36] Benjamin Balderson:
come on. That one guy debated that one night that you wanted to come on. He said he'll come on. That'd be fun. It was, like, the night before I left for the trip. So Right. That has not been followed up upon.
[02:01:49] allen marcus:
Right. And we are in good faith. We are exploratory in nature. We just wanna have a real contrived clickbait topic title to bring all the boys to the yard that want our milkshake.
[02:02:06] Benjamin Balderson:
Boys do like milkshakes.
[02:02:08] allen marcus:
It's it's the it's the marketing of the material that we've been struggling with. So that's the value for value model. We've provided some value, some information, some, licensing, and,
[02:02:21] Benjamin Balderson:
what was it? The medical code? So you can bring that to your doctor. Out there and make some fights is what we gotta do, like fight club. We gotta get out there and pick some fights and get in some good arguments, and then we'll do just fine.
[02:02:36] allen marcus:
It's not like fight club where we're not talking about deliberating dog face sues. We're talking about deliberating dog face sues at every opportunity. Marketing ourself and our our brand name here to get some recognition to, talk with Jordan Peterson level academics and just really shut them down.
[02:02:56] Steve :
That'd be fun.
[02:02:58] allen marcus:
That's that's the goal.
[02:03:00] Benjamin Balderson:
And for that That would be fun. We wanna make sure we'll make sure we'll make sure we'll make sure the psychotic break.
[02:03:06] allen marcus:
Right. Yep. Mhmm.
[02:03:11] Benjamin Balderson:
Like, it seemed like it was fun until he had to shoot himself to kill the other half of himself, then that that you know, that's too far. Yeah. That didn't look like fun.
[02:03:23] allen marcus:
Not fun at all. Maybe, Bill Maher. You know, he had his his show, and he's just doing softball questions. All these big shows are just giving each other back rubs and high fives and not even pretending to explore actual controversy. It's all rehearsed. It's all preplanned drama that's all fake, but we're ready to bring the heat and be real.
[02:03:51] Steve :
Bill Maher is an absolute clown.
[02:03:54] allen marcus:
You hear that Bill Maher?
[02:03:57] Steve :
Oh, I think he knows. I think he knows.
[02:04:02] allen marcus:
He's gotta know. He's got a big red nose, and we're about to boop it and beep it. I I tell you what, though. Like, the way
[02:04:09] Benjamin Balderson:
Andrew Wilson manhandled, that libertarian dude that's on more mainstream and allowed to speak with all the mainstream guys. Like Well, yeah. If those guys come on shows like that and dudes like Andrew just manhandle them, those dudes are not are not gonna play with us because, like, they're just scared. They were already scared. And then, like, that dude made it it's like Andrew just like like a little kid, treated him like a little kid. We're talking about Dave Smith. Right? Yeah.
[02:04:40] Steve :
Yeah. Yeah. I saw, like, a half an hour of that. Like And I was, like, right after Dave Smith freaking manhandled Chris Cuomo.
[02:04:52] Benjamin Balderson:
That's what I'm saying. Like, holy cow. Those guys would never debate with any of us because they would get smoked. Like, they if they have if they have an actual debate about anything, they're in trouble.
[02:05:14] Steve :
That does seem to be the case. It really does. Like, just way in way over their heads.
[02:05:25] allen marcus:
We're gentlemen. This is a separate club. We're just debating for the sake of debate. I'll choose a position or have one assigned to me. I'll debate anything. Just give me the position. I'll fill up airspace on a microphone. We just wanna have fun with this. Mhmm. We just wanna explore ideas, figure things out. Nothing's decided until the end of the debate, and the debate never ends.
[02:05:50] Benjamin Balderson:
It just keeps going on and on. Well, I mean, except for whether cheese is the primary food that you should be
[02:05:58] allen marcus:
eating. The the moon is made of cheese.
[02:06:01] Benjamin Balderson:
Like, we already figured out that the poo food pyramid was incorrect, and it's mostly incorrect because they tried to make meat the primary substance, and it's obviously cheese.
[02:06:13] allen marcus:
That's why government has reserves of cheese in caves where the lizard people protect it. Yeah. David Ike, we're ready to have a debate. We know we live in a simulation, and we're ready to have a simulated debate debate with you in your matrix Zoom room. Let's go. I saw you the other night during the Aurora Borealis. You were just there. You were glowing, Riley. It was brilliant. I love that performance. You united the right and the left and all all the people who didn't pay for their television licenses over there across the pond. Let's have a tea party. You know, Sarah Palin not invited. Let's do this thing. Politics, occult geometry, whatever you wanna talk about, let's go David Ike or Jamie Ike. You have your whole iconic network of sons and daughters of the revolution.
17/76 has never been, like, 1984 or whatever Alex Jones wants to do. Oh, let's go, Bill Hicks. Come on. We wanna have fun with this. Blast when we blast. Fighting words, fighting words, freestyle, hip hop, you know, do some beatboxing, whatever it takes. We'll spin around on cardboard boxes, b boy, beat boxing, whatever it is. We'll make fools of ourselves. Just let us debate. It's gonna get embarrassing if we have to keep begging anyone to debate us. And I'm prepared to be a Disney adult debater. I don't care the color of your hair. Right. You are not prepared to be This is an audio podcast.
Beers are not required, but recommended.
[02:07:59] Benjamin Balderson:
What do you guys wanna see us debate about? Right. Yeah. There's no
[02:08:04] Steve :
I gotta jump out here in a minute for you guys.
[02:08:07] allen marcus:
Don't jump. You're like living. I'm seated. We need to see you next week.
[02:08:12] Steve :
I more or less need to stand up. Stay off of bridges. To a different room. I'll be home next week.
[02:08:19] Benjamin Balderson:
Marcus and I are home safe. Yep. The the the road did not swallow Marcus. Bill and Tanno and Marcus and Lee and company all kicked that thing apart and saved everybody.
[02:08:34] allen marcus:
Darren b threw out a great video for a coalition. Face dudes do.
[02:08:39] Benjamin Balderson:
Yeah.
[02:08:44] allen marcus:
Do you guys have any final debate notes? Do you make all your major points? Where where do we stand on this, debate about emotional support animals that we've kind of found our position? Are we still on the fence about it?
[02:09:02] Steve :
I'd I'd you know, I'd really, I think that it's one of those things that you kind of want to there should there really should be a vetting process for who gets to have an emotional support animal on some level on some level.
[02:09:24] allen marcus:
It's like every girl asks her father, dad, can I have a pony? And if the father gives her a pony, then she's gonna need a whole horse ranch to raise all of her horses. If you give a mouse a cookie, you'll ask for entire dairy farm. So he always has milk. If you give him an inch, he'll ask for a mile, this type of thing. If we allow emotional support animals in restaurants, then everything becomes table scraps. We have to draw the line somewhere. There has to be clear boundaries and definitions of things. And that's the problem we're facing with the blurring of lines between tornadoes and hurricanes, genderless bathrooms, this type of thing.
Tim Walz, we know we know where you are in Minnesota.
[02:10:16] Steve :
Big fan of horses, Tim Walz.
[02:10:22] Benjamin Balderson:
There there's a song That's good. There's a song in Minnesota that the Minnesota stations made up about, tampons in the restroom, how that's gonna solve everything. It's pretty fucking hilarious.
[02:10:36] Steve :
That's good stuff.
[02:10:37] Benjamin Balderson:
Yeah.
[02:10:41] Steve :
No. I've I've seen yeah. I mean, I have. I've seen, you know, animal, and I don't think, like, the old timers necessarily would have registered them as, emotional support animals unless they had to take a flight. You know? But I've seen that be a very, very beneficial thing. I know, you know, me having a dog is a very beneficial thing for my overall mental health. And Gomez. Dude, he's the best.
[02:11:11] allen marcus:
So I've seen old the other. I know how the story ends. I think at some point, we're gonna debate the the issue, of eugenics and self electing to eject from this mortal coil. That idea to say, you know what? I give up. Inject me. Let me let me go and and reincarnate somewhere else or whatever happens after death. I think that's the big question. We'll probably get into that debate. Maybe cryogenics. Is it worth it to have your brain frozen?
[02:11:44] Benjamin Balderson:
So where I stand on it is, while I think the emotional weakness is ridiculous, I'm all for everybody having animals. So I'm not gonna fight it. I don't care. I have 0 shits to give. But, yeah, the emotional weakness is ridiculous.
[02:12:12] allen marcus:
It does get absolutely absurd. And the way that Alex Jones' gods made frogs, you know, gay is a fact now that we can no longer debate. That's established and on Wikipedia. So bring your Wikipedia articles next week to the debate, and we'll see you in the comment section, if that's okay with you. Because we need your consent.
[02:12:42] Steve :
Have a good night, everybody.
Introduction and Service Dogs in Vegas
Guard Dogs vs. Emotional Support Animals
Debating Emotional Support Animals
Legal Aspects of Emotional Support Animals
Cultural Perspectives on Emotional Support Animals
Emotional Support Animals in Courtrooms
Service Dogs vs. Emotional Support Animals
Final Thoughts and Debate Summary
