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Originally broadcast on: http://radiosoapbox.com Radio Soapbox

Women's Hour broadcasts live every Sunday at 7:00p.m. uk time. 

Helping nurses from reaching burnout !


Good evening, ladies and the few men who might be listening. Welcome to Women's Hour on Radio Soapbox. I'm your host, Shelley Tasker. Today is Sunday, 21st July, and we have a fantastic guest, Jeanelle Classen, a nurse, author, and life coach from Perth. Jeanelle shares her journey of overcoming nurse burnout, the challenges she faced during the COVID-19 pandemic, and how she now helps other nurses avoid burnout. She also discusses her book and the importance of self-care and setting boundaries in the nursing profession. Jeanelle's insights are invaluable for anyone in the healthcare industry, especially those struggling with the demands of shift work and emotional tolls of the job. We also touch on the importance of work-life balance, healthy coping mechanisms, and the need for better support systems for nurses. Jeanelles story is a testament to resilience and the power of self-care. Don't miss this enlightening conversation.

[00:01:02] Unknown:

Good evening, ladies. All women out there and to the few men that might be sneakily listening, this is Women's Hour   coming out of Radio Soapbox dotcom. It's good to have your company.   I am your host, Shelley Tasker.   So today's date is Sunday, 21st July,   and I have a great guest lined up this evening.   A nurse.   She's got some great information to share to avoid burnout   burnout. Sorry. She is an author,   and kinda life coach, I would say. Anyway, her name is Chanel Klassen, and,   hopefully,   Chanel is ready. Yep. She's ready. So let's get Chanel   on the line.  

She is from Perth. So she set her alarm for early hours. I think that's 2 AM   there.   Good evening, Janelle.   Good evening. Can you hear me? I can hear you. How are you doing?  

[00:02:00] Unknown:

I am well. Thank you. I,   I'm still waking up a little bit, but I'm here. Yep. Bless you. I was just saying,  

[00:02:07] Unknown:

yeah, it's, like, 2 o'clock in the morning where you are in Perth.   It is. It is. And you've got a newborn baby as well.  

[00:02:14] Unknown:

I do. She's attached to me. So   we're   we're very weary wearing this morning.  

[00:02:20] Unknown:

Oh, how old is she?  

[00:02:22] Unknown:

She's a week old yesterday.  

[00:02:24] Unknown:

Oh, and look at you. Lively and ready to do podcasts and radio shows. You're amazing.  

[00:02:29] Unknown:

Oh, man. Look. It it definitely wasn't the intention. There we go. It definitely wasn't the intention,   but I figured, you know, it's always it's always good to to have a chat, so might as well. You know? Yeah. Definitely.  

[00:02:42] Unknown:

Definitely.   Can you tell us a little bit about yourself, Chanel, and how you've got to, like, what you're doing at the moment, helping nurses out?  

[00:02:50] Unknown:

Yeah. Well, thank you so much for having me. I'm I'm really, despite the early morning, I'm really excited to be here. You're my first guest that's ever set an alarm, I think, for 2 o'clock in the morning, so thank you.   You're welcome. You're welcome.   Yeah. So I so, yeah, like I said, my name is Janelle. I,   I'm a registered nurse.   I'm a mom of now 2,   and,   I also my husband works as a fire flying flyer. Mine, mine is assistant or Wardula's assistant.   He's currently on leave. Thank goodness.   But it basically just means that he is away for 2 weeks at a time, and then he comes home for a week, and then he's away again. So,   yeah, I I for the last 5 years, I've been   working with nurses around beating and preventing nurse burnout because   I experienced   burnout myself within the 1st 6 months of starting in the industry.  

So, yeah, I've been really really passionate about that over the last 5 years. Yeah. Wow. So how did you get to that point of reaching burnout?   Oh,   look.   I think like many   many who start,   their first job out of out of uni   just felt,   well, I was very delighted,   in just not knowing exactly what I signed up for.   And,   yeah. So I basically   so what happened? So in the 1st 6 months, so this was actually just as   COVID   hit.   It's kind of when it all ramped up. So before just before COVID hit, I was   finishing up my training and starting to work casually, but then when COVID hit, I was working in a hospital. And,   as the whole world knows,   it all went a little bit, pear shaped.  

And,   I   I started to notice in myself that I was dreading to go to work, and,   I was really just I was struggling with my relationships at home. I was snapping at them, you know, just not wanting anyone to come near me or talk to me or touch me at the end of a shift. And these are just a couple of red flags that kept coming up for me. And, like, you know, my sleep was all over the place, being a shift worker.   So it was my eating habits and all that jazz.   And, I started asking   my   my supervisors,   hey. Like, I'm noticing these things.   How do I better cope with it? And the answer that I got from   my,   supervisor was get used to it. It's not gonna change. Oh, nice advice.  

Yes. Very helpful, and,   I just didn't take that as a proper answer because I was then starting to see and notice the same things in my colleagues, and these guys were, you know, 2, 3, 5, 10 years ahead of me   on veganism, and I was like, I don't wanna be a bitter   bitterness   or, you know, just hating my   my work life, or the only thing that I get to look forward to is a glass of wine at the end of a shift.   And and I was just I was just not gonna take that for an answer, so I actually offered to do it's called a quality improvement project here in   Australia. So I'm actually not sure what it's called in other countries, but it basically means nurses take on a research project   to help improve quality of care.  

And I was kicked back saying again, like, you're in your 1st 6 months. Don't worry about it. And so I, yeah, I I did worry about it, and I took it on myself and and did the research for myself.   So it took me,   the neck on on another whole journey over the next,   the first 6 months was just reaching burnout and rock bottom, basically. And then,   from there, it started   just   diving into   as much coaching or, training and books and, like, just everything and anything I could find to try and   figure out how am I going to not   not,   be stuck in it,   Especially because at that point, I didn't have any kids yet, and I was like, how am I going to manage when I have children?  



[00:07:03] Unknown:

Yes.  

[00:07:04] Unknown:

Yeah. So I   I I then decided,   yeah, to to do all that. I mean, what from there? Sorry. My brain is a little bit.   But yeah. So I it was really, really,   hard, to try and figure out what was working because all I could find was advice   for for CEOs and business owners and,   you know, stay at home moms or if you're in corporate. And it was just never tailored to the shift working person. We   haven't like, even less for nurses.   You know, it's,   we're a very unique species.   You know, we deal with people at their highest highs and lowest lows,   And and there was just nothing really that was tailored tailored to our unique needs.  

And so I started to pick out the little bits and pieces that were working   and started implementing it for myself and sharing with some colleagues.   And,   I was seeing some really great results. I have one story,   where where we we, unfortunately   I was in ICU at the time, like, working as ICU nurse.   And we had,   had just   lost a patient,   after a very long day of trying to, you know, get them get them stable.   And,   I turned to my co nurses, and I asked, so   when are we gonna do a debrief,   of the patient that we just lost? And, again, the answer I got was, it's gonna happen again.   You know, we are behind on our shift. The shift's gonna change in the next 2 hours. Let's just get it done and go home.  

And, at that point, I was this was maybe 2 yeah. 2 and a half years ago. So that was a good couple of years after I had kind of discovered what was working for me.   And thank goodness I had these skills because if I hadn't, I would have been in a blubbering mess   trying to fathom,   you know, the life that we've just lost.   And,   you know, it it doesn't get easier and just people just bury it, if that makes sense. Absolutely. Yes.   Yeah. Yeah. So so, you know, it was,   that was kind of where I realized, oh, wow. Okay.   This is real.  

And   I kind of cannot be the only one that's that has to, you know, kind of just get told to suck it up all the time. And it's just such a toxic,   mindset to be in, really.   And that's when I decided to write my book and put it all into one one place,   all of them that I was that I was using because,   yeah, like I say, if I if I hadn't had the tools that I had in my tool belt that I call, I call it my tool belt, my big blown out tool belt, Because if I didn't have those skills,   I would have, you know, not I would have struggled I would have come home, struggled to sleep because then I'm, like, trying to debrief with myself, and   I'm not sure if you've ever experienced,   it doesn't have to be   a major thing, but, like, when you're just spiral thinking, and you're like, oh, what could I have done? Or, like, I should have done that, or you're beating yourself up,   this and that. Yeah.  

And I just I   I realized, oh, like, I'm I'm actually   I'm actually able to use my my I've got a brain dump exercise where I always just put everything that's in my mind, and I put it on a piece of paper,   and, use that as a way to kind of filter through my thoughts and my emotions and the experiences that I was having,   whether it was a good day and a bad day. And it was just the way that I I was able to start one of the many tools that I was able to start using to process.   And, yeah. So then I decided, okay. Right. I need to put this into writing, and I need to   share this because,   yeah, like, we just don't get taught this stuff in uni, and that is my main   my main issue. The point with our training is we we get told, make sure you look after yourself,   and know that you do you take your breaks and stuff, but we never get told   the how to of of self care as a as a nurse.  

And we get told that if,   you know, whatever   whatever happens on our shift, if it wasn't written down, it didn't happen, and it gets drawn into us that we need to, you know, be on top of our documentation. But,   from personal experience, I don't feel that we get taught how to,   it doesn't get drilled into us enough how important self care is and what to do in terms of self care.  

[00:11:42] Unknown:

So yeah. Sorry. I feel like I'm I'm just talking at you. No. No. No. This this is what I like. You just say it as it is, my lovely.   Yeah. Thank you. Thank you. No. No. That's alright. I just it's nice to hear your story. I mean, I used to work in hospitals   until COVID, really, and I've experienced a few things, you know, when we've lost people and those questions of, like you just said about, could I have done more? And   looking back there was bells ringing and I think, you know, one particular occasion I should have stayed with this guy that was really scared.   It's really hard but everybody needs you, don't they? Exactly. Self reflection after is fine, but it does take its toll on you looking after people as well. If you wanna be that great nurse, you you've gotta give give your all, really, haven't you? It's not just about ticking boxes.  

You do get involved as well.  

[00:12:30] Unknown:

You really do. You really do. Especially when you start working in, I think you mentioned that you work in,   like, aged care facilities and and things like that.   And you just really start to get to know the people that you work with, and you get to know their families.   And so you really become part of that family for a short while until they either move on to a different area or they pass on. So,   it's it's really  

[00:12:56] Unknown:

it's really, really a privilege. It would love to Yeah. You know? A privilege, but also, yeah, I suppose a bit of a pain. I mean, only a couple of weeks ago, I I went in. You know, a gentleman needed to move to a new home that was closer to his family, and I get it. It was so right for him, but, oh, I broke my heart that morning because I saw this man every morning.   He was like somebody you know, he's almost like one of your work colleagues because you're going in and serving them, so to speak. And then 2 hours later, I found out that another lady,   who I used to visit every day in the home, she'd passed the day before, and these were 2 people that were my main complimentals people that you could have a conversation with.  

Both gone, and I went for a few days really, like, I don't know if I wanna do my job anymore. I've lost 2 of my favorite people.  

[00:13:44] Unknown:

Yeah. Exactly. Exactly. And, you just can't plan these things.   No. No. No. Especially when it's out of your control, and I think that's a big one,   is we   we   nurses really like to control things,   and, I mean, I'm sure many people many other people do as well. But I've I've especially found,   us nurses, we do like to to and pretty much anyone, I think, who works in   in health care   is we really we wanna help people, and and we then, as a result, try to control every every little thing.   But one of the hardest lessons I've had to learn is I need to look at the things that I actually can control   and   and then kind of go from there because, otherwise, I'm going to just beat myself up about over things that I absolutely have no power over,   which, obviously, can lead down to to a big spiral of   just you also can feel completely helpless and,   because you actually can't do anything.  



[00:14:48] Unknown:

No. No. Bad. That's And I mean Yeah. My my role, I was a carer in the care home, and then, I've moved over to the activities   coordinator.   Oh, cool. Yeah. It is such a rewarding   job. It's hard because lots of people have got dementia there and, you know,   trying to get them to engage. But, you know, things work, some things don't.   Yeah. But I find, like I said to my partner the other week, when I come home, like, I am drained when I come home because I'm giving myself to people all day. I'm giving them all of my positive energy, and some of them are, you know, in a good place.   And it's been an interesting curve seeing how people have lived their lives, and then they move to a nursing home. You know? For the first time in their life, it it can be quite distressing for them, really. Very distressing. Yeah.  

Absolutely. Absolutely. And you take on their problems, don't unfortunately.  

[00:15:38] Unknown:

You do. You do. If you if you especially if you,   I mean, like,   I feel like it's very normal to take that on, but then what's really important is learning how to create,   a bit of a   a way to,   like you say, self debrief.   And that that's exactly   why I get so passionate about,   you know,   having these tools in your tool belt so that when you find us that you are drained because you've had a really emotional day, that you can really learn how to,   in a healthy way, take off that carer's hat,   and put on your I'm at home hat now, or my mum hat, or my partner hat,   because often, we then try to continue on just powering through with our nurses or our carers hat,   And then,   we're wondering why we're pushing our our loved ones away or   why we've got breakdown in our personal lives.  

And it's because we're just trying to nurse everyone. And I don't mean necessarily,   in a health way, but, like, we just we continue on with our nurses' mindset of, I need to continue just giving, giving, giving, giving, and just never taking that time for ourselves   to just pause and reflect on,   you know, where am I at? What is happening for me?   How am I coping? How is my health,   my own health? You know, I always it's such a cliche in it, but it's so so true is you gotta look at,   you you can't   pour from an empty cup. So,   yeah, and that's that's exactly what what I what I've,   I've recent recently   put together, like, a free training,   because I again, I'm just trying to think of ways to to get the   we'll call it my message   on, on, being burnout. And so it's a, you know, a free training that kind of just goes over, like, the 3 main things that,   what is it called? That,   you know, that we we need as nurses on how to,   create work life balance and and, you know, take off those hats and and know when to do it without feeling guilty for taking time for ourselves or and and   while still,   you know, dealing   really healthily with shift work,  

[00:18:05] Unknown:

because that's another thing is shift work was just taking it just takes a toll on your body. Yeah. It's not for everyone, is it? No. I think now, like, my mum always did night shifts in the hospital, and   ever since she's retired, she has awful problems sleeping.  

[00:18:22] Unknown:

Yeah.   Yeah. Absolutely.   And, you know, you often hear,   nurses kind of joke on the floor,   or I can't wait to get home and have my glass of wine at the end of the shift, and I've got nothing against wine. Like, my husband and I, we have a wine subscription because,   you know, it's it's it's good. Like, you know, you'd love a little glass of wine with dinner. However,   I I spoke with a client,   and we were saying that,   you know, if you start looking forward to a glass of wine at the end of the shift,   and that's all that's what you need to go to sleep,   that one glass or more,   because I often I often say, you know, glass, nudge, nudge,   wig wig, bottle. Yes.  

You know, that that's dangerous, and we, you know, that, again, leads to a whole and a whole another,   spiral of of poor health decisions, and it's a coping mechanism for many.   With a bit of a culture, a drinking culture in the nurses'   space,   where   it's again, I look forward like, you know, it's really funny. You see memes and things   on social media around,   you know,   the one glass, but it's actually you know, it can take a whole bottle's worth. Yeah.   You know, and it's really funny, like,   but there is, like, you know, that small little below the surface, beneath the surface of,   if we're supposed to be these pioneers for good health,   and we're looking forward to glasses and wine and or other other coping mechanisms that aren't sustainable and unhealthy, then   that should be a red flag to you that   there's something amiss.  



[00:20:00] Unknown:

Oh, I feel like you're preaching to me   now. No. Because I do enjoy   a glass wink wink bottle   per night,   and,   it's one of those things for a long time. It's like it's it's been a habitual process probably over about 15 years.   I know it's no good for me, and my brain is foggy, and it's like, I I do know, you know, it's time to  

[00:20:23] Unknown:

change. Yeah. But, That's the thing. Like, and it's not about guilt. It's about just realizing that we don't get taught, not necessarily   I I guess, let's take this further than just nurses, is we don't get taught as human beings how to cope with   life stress.   You know, we just kinda have to try and figure it out for ourselves. So, of course, that we turn to the easiest things that are within reach.   So, yeah, no, I totally get it because that's exactly   one of the things   that was that it was a red flag to me,   you know 5 4 or 5 years ago,   to kind of go  

[00:21:00] Unknown:

hold up like how do I wanna how do I wanna go for the next 5 plus years or whatever? So Yeah. I suppose I don't think ahead but it's interesting because, like, when I used to do 12 hour shifts at the hospital,   my partner would have a glass of wine pulled for me in the fridge ready,   and I'd be like, I can't talk to anybody. Alright? I just need to watch rubbish TV now and drink. Okay? Yeah. Yeah.   But I see on   your website   that,   statistically wise, you said that at least 25%   of nurses   have an experience in burnout symptoms.  

[00:21:37] Unknown:

Yeah. Oh, yeah. It is. It is, and it's climbing   all the time, and there's different areas that have even higher rates of of burnout. And,   you know, I often see nurses leave the industry because,   they're either either the young nurses leave because they're like, oh, I'm I they kind of tell themselves, oh, I'm not cut out for it, like, because I can't cope.   Or you see the older nurses leave, because they're, like, I just can't do it anymore.   And it's heartbreaking because   these guys are excellent nurses. It's just again, they just don't have those skills   to   to,   to manage and and deal with with with shift work and deal with the trauma,   and and   the workload sometimes of nursing. And   I'm not saying that everyone should,   leave nursing. I'm not saying that everyone should stay in nursing, but what I'm definitely saying is there's, unfortunately, just so many   nurses who   who think that it's them,   when we are already in a broken system.  

So the system isn't set up to to support us, and so that's why I   I focus on the things that we can control because  

[00:22:50] Unknown:

otherwise, we're gonna go insane, trying to think about the ways to control and then fix it for consistent Doing, you know, studying all of those years, doing your dream job, and then realizing, actually, this is, nothing what I thought it would be. Yeah.  

[00:23:03] Unknown:

Exactly. And, I mean, like, I that's that, you know, I I was there. Like, I had no idea what I was in for until I was on the floor,   and I knew that I wanted to help people and I was and and   passionate about helping others, but I just had no idea   the the   the outside things, the the things that came with the dream,   because there's love loving can prepare you,   you, except for, you know, skill having   I always say, you've gotta have your tool belt ready to go. So I work with,   nurses who are training, and I work with young nurses. And I've worked with a nurse who had been nursing for 35 years,   and,   she was at a turning point where she was like, I'm supposed to retire in the next, you know, 5 to 10 years, but I'm kind of at that point now.  

And so when we were working together,   she was like, well, thank goodness   that we've got to sit down and really just make a plan of what's gonna work for me   because if I if we haven't, I would be leaving the industry right now, and I've   spent 35 years   in it.   And, you know, she was like, I was I was really   grieving that I might have to give up on on something that I've spent so much time and energy   in,   it's something that I love, but something that was starting to be unhealthy for me. So it's just again, it's what a it's such an honor to be able to   to see these nurses,   kind   of come to a place of realization of, oh, it's not it's not my fault, but this is what I can do about it.  

It's very empowering,   way to to go into it,   you know, when there's so much going on. There's so many moving parts.  

[00:24:57] Unknown:

And I suppose, I mean, when you're a trained nurse well, when you first start, like, with any job, I've been doing this job for nearly a year now, and I've had, like, 2 supervisions.   Basically, the questions   asked,   they're all about ticking the boxes and dotting the i's, basically.   It's like, oh, you've had x amount of sick days.   Yeah. How how do you feel about this? Well, I can't help it if my child's sick, or if I'm sick, it's just what it is.   At the last one I actually said to the lady, 'Wouldn't it be nice   if when you did these supervisions   that you actually said do you know what? Since you've been here or what have you, you've done really well at this this this a bit of praise. There's never anybody there to, like, build you,   so to speak. Just a bit of positive feedback.  

I always feel like there's a role for someone in every ward, perhaps they should have a different person every morning for 2 minutes to, like, do the wake and shake   exercises and a little one minute   motivation. You got this. I believe in you.   And it's it's really little things, isn't it? I mean, I don't need someone to tell me I'm good at this and and stuff like that, but I know that I've made   massive changes in my job to lots of people's lives. And   to to be picked up on, like, you've had a couple of days sick and what have you, it's like, come on. You should be here  

[00:26:17] Unknown:

building us up, not trying to break us down on our sick sick stuff. You know? Exactly. Exactly. And you are so, so right. It is the small stuff that makes the difference.   You know, that it's not about   it's not about   starting a whole new thing and and revamping everything all at once. It's about doing one little thing at a time and that's another thing that I,   put so I in my book, I put in 6 main,   like, areas and things that,   that I found   are missing in our training to to create work life balance and prevent   burnout, or be a beat, and then continue to prevent burnout. And one of them is   setting   really,   resourceful and really sustainable   habits for ourselves, and one of them is starting small and,   you know, picking one thing at a time because otherwise you get overwhelmed. And if you're already burnt out, overwhelm is just gonna push you deeper.  

So, yeah, it's exactly right. We need to be able to start acknowledging   the good that we are doing, and not just where we're failing.   Or not even failing, just, you know, kind of slipping. Because often, we're not just we're not failing. We actually are just kind of veering off of where we'd like to be, and that but we keep veering a little bit more every time, and then it leads to a whole different direction, if that makes sense. Yeah. Definitely. Definitely.  

[00:27:43] Unknown:

I think we've all got little things we would like to change just to, like,   improve our lives, and I think you're right. It's, like, one step at a time. It's a process, isn't it? It can't all be achieved   in one   No. Yeah. So your book, where can people purchase your book, Chanel?  

[00:27:59] Unknown:

Yeah. So my book, I actually,   have been   so my book, sorry, I should say that that it's on my website on, nursing the nurse dot com. However,   I've currently got my my main thing as that training   that I put together because I just feel men need to get this in front of people. But so so people won't be able to purchase the book directly online, but I would love for them to reach out to me.   And that's at   [email protected],   to purchase the book because it's,   it's really I've currently got it in a on for print on demand, which means, basically, I don't have many copies lying around in my house.   So then if someone wants to purchase a physical copy, then I can, you know, print it out for them and and get it mailed to them. Otherwise,   it is available in ebook   format. And so, yeah, it's it's really   yeah.  

It's my pride and joy. I finished that book when I,   was  

[00:29:05] Unknown:

also officially postpartum with my firstborn. So Well, I think you should keep having babies.  

[00:29:10] Unknown:

Apparently, I'm a bit, a bit more productive.   Not a bit more productive, but I am I am a bit of a finisher when it comes to when I got new babies. Isn't that interesting?  

[00:29:21] Unknown:

And and, I mean, people say, don't they, that that is the most precious time, and, like, in certain religions and stuff in countries,   the woman won't do anything   for 30 days. Everyone will look after her, and I know, you know, my job is also I'm a part time photographer, and when my son was born,   I wanted to sit there and do a bit of work in the evenings. As much as I love the nurturing and everything like that, I've just got a brain   that needs to be fed, so to speak. Yeah. And perhaps you're thriving on less sleep.  

[00:29:53] Unknown:

Yeah. Look. I, I have been I've been so so grateful this,   the second time around. We were much better prepared for the postpartum than with the first. I think we kind of knew a little bit of what to expect.   Yeah. So I've been treated like absolute royalty by my husband, and, you know, he's just taken   on, running the household and looking after me.   And that's really created,   more space for me to be able to be creative and,   you know, kind of dive even deeper into into the little the passions that I've got. I I know that   many people also,   apart from the fact that you need you should and should and do need the rest postpartum, which I've just been soaking up, and I'm excited to continue to do so after this.  

Yeah.   You know, it's it's also,   you're you tend to be way more,   what is it called? It's a bit more on the woo woo side, but what do they say? That you you're,   because you've gone through this whole   birthing of not just your baby, but yourself as a new mother,   you're more open,   your mind is more open to creativity   and,   you know,   pretty much just creating.   So Yeah. No. I understand. Getting the most of that is is really yeah. Yeah. It's great.  

[00:31:13] Unknown:

So, I I mean, one of my friends, actually, she practiced as a nurse, and she did so long at the hospital when she decided it wasn't for her.   Then she worked   at a GP surgery, and she decided   not to vaccinate her children, but she was putting on vaccination   duty. Yes. And in the end, she said I can't do this job. I can't do this to other people's babies when I wouldn't do it to my own baby. Yeah. And then she's moved on to all different holistic things, hypnotherapy   and such like. And I've seen that this week, she's got a day where she's at the main hospital near us, and for 45 minutes, she's doing a breath work session. That's really cool. That's really, really cool.   So anybody that works at the hospitals, they just have  

[00:32:04] Unknown:

because it's very important.   Definitely. Very, very important. And I wish that more more places offered things like that,   to their   their workers because   yeah. Wow. That would make a huge difference if and when people do take it up.   Yeah. That's all. It is so important to just be, isn't it? Yes. It really is. It really is. And especially when   life is go go go,   work as a nurse is go go go, and many nurses being a female dominated industry are also mums and partners.   So they have to go home and be go go go at home.   So having that having that time to just be is vital.  



[00:32:45] Unknown:

Vital. I've just started again, actually. I think my son, he's approaching 11 now, and I feel like I've got a bit more time. But the last month, I've been to a couple of   sound healing baths and Cool. Just lie there for an hour and a half with all this beautiful music, a bit of meditation, and it's like, oh, my life has missed this. It has missed this. Yes.  

[00:33:05] Unknown:

Yeah. Yeah. And that's exactly right. It's like when you start creating space for things like that, and then you   either miss out or you stop   or, you know, like you say, you just really just   immerse yourself in the in the the pausing experience,   you realize just how much your body   craves   that pause.   And then when you don't when you don't do it, you're like you really miss it. Like, I I know for me, when I don't do my my brain dump exercise   for for, you know, if I haven't if I've missed a couple of days, and I start feeling a bit antsy, and I'm like, oh my goodness. Like, I need to, you know, I need to do this, I need to do that, and I, you know, my mind just goes crazy, and I'm like, just overwhelmed by my thoughts. And I'm like, oh, that's probably because I haven't taken these things out of my head.   Put it on a piece of paper and just kind of reorganize my thoughts and putting back what I need.  

Because if you don't do that, it's just you just it's all like a brain fog in your head, and and, you know, it's much easier to see   through the through the fog when when it's in front of you rather than   inside your head. So yeah.  

[00:34:14] Unknown:

Yeah. Lists and writing things down. Yeah. Very important.  

[00:34:18] Unknown:

Absolutely.   Absolutely.   Yes. No. It's it's   yeah.   I'm I'm actually   speechless at the at the thought of a a hospital offering breath work. It's awesome.  

[00:34:30] Unknown:

Oh, really? Well, perhaps that's something you do in your country.   I mean, it's all quite a new thing. I mean, if it goes well,   the council will probably pay her to regularly regularly do that for people.  

[00:34:43] Unknown:

That would be amazing. That'd be and it would make a huge difference in in those,   in those workers.  

[00:34:49] Unknown:

Yeah. Yeah. But I know lots of people will say, well, how am I meant to find time to go to that? I can't even   get time to go to the bathroom. I mean, one of the main reasons my sister-in-law gave up nursing on the floors because she used to get a urine infection all the time. She was just that busy.  

[00:35:06] Unknown:

Yeah.   Yeah. No. And that's another thing is, again, is the skill,   it is it is unfortunately,   a skill that we don't, again, get taught of how to say no.   You know, we don't get like, you know, when you're on the floor, you just always want to you want to do hurts again while you're there is because you wanna help and you wanna serve.   But then learning how to say no,   without being, you know, snarky or or rude about it, but just being really firm with our boundaries. We are,   we're yes men.  

[00:35:41] Unknown:

Yes. We are. We are.  

[00:35:43] Unknown:

To our own detriment. And, you know, again, that's another thing that we that we talk about   in the book and in the trainings and all of that,   is exactly that, is how to set healthy boundaries   without   having that guilt of, oh, I'm letting people down,   because that's, again, a danger. It's it's   we we give ourselves up when we start saying no.   And, you know, we're worried that we're gonna let people down, but, really, when we're taking too much on our plate, that's when we start   really letting others down because we're and ourselves, really. Because then we start getting things like urine infections and,   mental health issues and,   you know,   just binge eating because you need a pick me up on sugar,   you know, or, you know, go and have your glass of wine every night for   the rest of your life.  



[00:36:39] Unknown:

I mean, I've got to say as well, it's not the best place that I work and at just in the sense that, you know, there is food, and chocolate readily   available.   And since I've stopped doing care work, I have gained a few pounds because I'm not doing all of that rolling, moving, which I don't miss   at all. Occasionally, I will pitch in if they need an extra pair of hands.   I don't miss that side of it, but they're puddings.   Sometimes I like, I won't have a main course. I'll just have a puddin today or maybe 2.  

[00:37:10] Unknown:

You do get to that point you need the sugar, don't you as well? You do. You do. Exactly. I mean, that's it's again, there's absolutely no shame in enjoying those things because they're they're great.   It's about just finding that balance, and that's what many of us struggle with is finding that balance.  

[00:37:28] Unknown:

Yeah. Balance is everything.  

[00:37:32] Unknown:

For sure. For sure.  

[00:37:34] Unknown:

Well, it's been lovely talking to you. Yeah. Do you know? I won't hold you up any longer because, you you'd need to go and get your sleep. You might go and write another book actually now.  

[00:37:44] Unknown:

Oh, no. No. I wouldn't do that to myself, but, don't put it in my don't, don't tag me. I'm not sure.  

[00:37:51] Unknown:

And out of interest, I mean, are you cosleeping with your daughter?  

[00:37:55] Unknown:

I am. Yeah. So she,   I do have a little cosleep with Esa Met, but,  

[00:38:01] Unknown:

more often than not, she ends up in the bed with me. So And, you know, that's something I wish I did with my elder 2   because you know how exhausting it is breastfeeding or even just getting up in the night because they want to be with you.   And with my third one, I realized that   on the odd occasion, I'd pop him into bed with me,   and he would sleep all night.   Yeah. Yeah. You'd feel refreshed, and I know it's like a whole I don't know what it's like in Australia, but in England, they highly recommend that you don't go sleep. They do the same here. Oh, right. Yeah. But,   it was what something I wish I did do, really. Yeah. Yeah. No. I I definitely agree. It's,  

[00:38:40] Unknown:

so I tried to   I followed the the   I tried to follow and do everything by the book with the first,   that quickly went out the window when I fell pregnant with with this one, the second one,   where we used to be like, there's you know, they don't sleep in the bed. They don't do this, blah blah blah. Don't stay to sleep, all that stuff.   But you know what? I I don't know any,   functioning adult who still sleeps in the bed with their parents, and I don't know any functioning adult who still breastfeed to  

[00:39:11] Unknown:

sleep. So, They might always say that. Yeah.  

[00:39:14] Unknown:

Yeah. So, you know, that that reassures me that, you know, it is a season, and,   you know, it's just about being there for them and and providing me what they need.   So yeah.  

[00:39:25] Unknown:

Embracing it. Yeah. I think the worst thing I did was the   whole cry it out. I did that once, and I I mean, it did work, but and I did probably   I I gained my evenings again. You know, I was at that point. It's been I do need a little bit of life for me now. It's been 4 months or so,   but that was gut wrenching.  

[00:39:46] Unknown:

It is. It is. I mean, you know, they surprise us about our design to to make the mango.  

[00:39:52] Unknown:

We could never do that again. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, awful.  

[00:39:56] Unknown:

Yeah. No. It is full on. It is full. But, no, thank you so much   for having me. It's it's been absolutely lovely. I mean, I could I could talk about these things for hours and hours. So Oh, bless you. Well, you'll have to come on another time, and we'll have another catch up.  

[00:40:10] Unknown:

Yeah. Well, thank you so much. And anybody out there, Jeanette Claassen,   Chanel. Sorry.   I can't even read my own writing here.   Yeah. Her website is nursingthenurse.com,   and, it's full of lots of interesting things on there. So take and have a look. Okay, my lovely. Well, thank you so much, and I hope you get a good night's sleep.  

[00:40:32] Unknown:

Thank you. Thank you.   Bless you. We we we're off to a good start, so hopefully, you know, knock on wood. Yeah. Fingers crossed.   Yeah. Well, thank you so much, Shelley, and I appreciate  

[00:40:43] Unknown:

it. You again. Yeah. Look forward to it. Okay. Sweet. You take care of yourself. Bye. Thank you. You too. Bye bye. Bye.   Wow. Oh,   how lovely to connect to someone in Perth.   Yeah. It was Perth. Yeah. It was quite funny because I was having a random   moment. I'm very disorganized in my life at the moment. I'm a bit foggy.   Is it the bottle of wine?   Is it the menopause?   I don't know, but my brain.   And I seem to be all queued up for, like, the next few weeks of guests,   messaging people, and then, of course, you're waiting for messages back.   Then we realized we're in different time zones. People have said yes, then it's like, oh, sorry. Can we prerecord?  

Which I'm gonna start doing more of actually because, I do appreciate I don't expect people to get up at 2 o'clock in the morning, especially with a 10 day old baby.   So,   bit of a random one out there this morning. I had no guest, and I was like, I'm just gonna wing it tonight.   And I was awake at half past 9, thoughts flying, and I thought I actually need to   go downstairs   and write some of these things down,   be kind of prepared if I haven't got a guest, then for an hour,   I need to fill a slot. Otherwise, there'll be an hour of,   well, empty airwaves, so to speak, on radio soapbox.  

So I don't have a second guest,   but I'm gonna do our usual   life hack segment. And, again, I'm gonna read it because people are not enjoying leaving the voice notes.   I do understand that.   Right. Let's play   this week's   life hack. Let me find   the right page for the music because it wouldn't   do   do with typically womeny things,   makeup,   cooking, cleaning,   anything.   Come on. Of inspiration   or playing an own pong with wrong music. We're gonna have to forget music. Chop that up. That's last week, and I thought I was so scared. Thank you. There would be  

[00:42:54] Unknown:

wax lemons  

[00:42:56] Unknown:

juice I wonder if anybody would remember the juice and I kept trying 2 teaspoons of lemon juice Right.   To close it trains Close it. Along with And what's gonna be playing somewhere out the tube. I can't even see where it's playing. Then Is it live? As you can tell.   And the juices to expand. I'm a movie. I can't even find the freezer. Do you know what? Just listen to the rest of this life hack. Pop out the individual  

[00:43:28] Unknown:

ice cubes into a cup and pour over some hot water for a nice   non gluten   ginger and lemon tea.   Second1   is you can purchase   some ceremonial   grade matcha   green tea,   you can have that as normal tea or you can make it up as a tea,   allow it to chill,   place it into   a bottle,   top it up with filtered cold water,   and a top tip would be to just put a little bit of smidgen   of rybeena   juice into it and it takes away any bitterness, taste you may have   or dislike.   Brilliant for bloating along with weight loss as well. Enjoy.  

[00:44:18] Unknown:

I've managed to pause it.   Right. I am gonna read this week's life hack.   Right.   So   this is from Emma.   She says I am a batch cooker.   Large trays of flapjacks, roast chicken   is picked and turned into chicken curry.   I don't think she   means the flapjacks as well.   Bruised apples turned into apple pie,   stale bread made into bread and butter pudding.   I also grow as much vegetables,   easy veg as I can,   lettuce and cucumber hanging baskets and tomatoes to save space,   Container grown potatoes.   It just takes the edge of the shopping bill. I hang my clothes as soon as they come out of the tumble dryer as it saves ironing.   When they are warm, the creases drop out when hung on hangers. Thank you, Emma.  

I'm trying to get into all this batch cooking thing because   cooking,   it's, like, it's my love, but it's also my hate.   So, like, Friday evening,   there was 5 different dinners in this house,   And that's not something that would usually happen. My son,   he has the same dinner every week every night, okay, which is mashed potatoes, Yorkshire puddings, and gravy. So he had his usual. I had my grandson for the night.   He wanted beans and sausages on toast from a tin. Great.   It was quite a healthy little meal, actually. And then my granddaughter had one of these ready meals.   And then my other half, I cooked his sausages.  

You know, they were really late because I used the air fryer, which I don't usually use. This is just boring information for you.   And, you know, they've got 2 sides. Well, I cooked the side that the sausages weren't in, so they still weren't ready. And I think I made something really simple for myself. That isn't a usual scenario.   I don't know. I think just my lack of planning and organization.   And I really want to get into all of this growing my own vegetables, not for saving the money,   but to know what I'm eating. And at the moment, I'm really into   not eating processed foods.  

I'll drink a bottle of processed wine. No problem.   I but I'm trying to do my bit. You might have heard from other shows. I'm really into this gut health stuff.   And this week,   I've sourced a farmer who does raw milk. Well, in the UK, as in lots of places,   actually, it's illegal.   And I literally spent all last Saturday evening delving into rabbit holes as where you can get it, why you can't have it. And there's lots of different theories, actually, why you can't get   raw milk. And one of them is the whole TB   experience that people believed that,   p, humans were contacting TB through the cows.  

So let's kill everything, basically, and pasteurize it.   I can't think of another theory straight to my head, but, lots of reasons. But looking into it,   I found a chart,   and the chart actually shows   all of the benefits that you should have in milk. But when they're pasteurized,   you lose it all, basically. There is nothing.   I mean, you might get a little bit of calcium,   but all of the wonderful things, all of the good things that you need for your gut health are all in that raw milk.   So I put a post on Facebook, and a few people had replied to me. And, I took a drive,   and I went to this quirky little farm shop that was all organic food.  

And, when I was stood there, I could see the light newspaper.   Now if you're in the UK   and you're   up with the truth movement and stuff like that, you will probably know what the light newspaper is. It's a newspaper that is produced monthly.   It's free,   and it's from journalists   that, they post publications that you would not see. It's alternative news. So, therefore, alternative to me is possibly   probably   real news, basically.   But I saw this pile of the light newspapers on the shelf, and I was like, definitely definitely   in the right place.  

So I introduced myself,   and we we had a chat. And he was asking me   why I wanted the raw milk, and I explained about my son.   And my my son is a little bit on the spectrum, not massively, but sensory stuff, things like that.   So and it's a bit of a fact. Well, it's not a fact because it's too illegal to be a fact. But if you can   maintain regular   healthy gut health and reset your system,   that things like cancer and autism   can be reversed, so to speak.   So, anyway, I've ordered 6 liters,   6 pints of,   raw milk,   and I'm really looking forward to getting that. It's only a little bit, but, you know, it has   cocoa pops, not a great cereal. But, actually, when you read, there are a few vitamins and stuff in them. But if he has a bowl of that in the morning and the afternoon as a snack with raw milk,   and then when I mash his potatoes and put raw milk and raw butter in,   then I feel like I'm getting   something good in him.  

And, you know, try just finding sneaky little ways   to put healthy foods just like the   water that you boil your vegetables in, use that to make the gravy.   Apparently, my granny,   what she used to do with all the water left over on the roast on a Sunday,   she would pour that in a jug. I can't remember what she called it, but that was her vitamin drink each week.   So, yeah, I'm just trying to get into this whole healthy approach, really.   So, basically, I have got this chart in front of me.   Raw milk compared to other milks.   You've got the beneficial enzymes, the diverse probiotics,   lactase producing bacteria,   healthy fats,   proteins,   bioavailable vitamins, bioavailable   calcium,   bioavailable   phosphorus,   and IGA, I g IGJ,   immunoglobulins,   and AA,   CLA, DHA,   and EPA. I don't know what they are. But, basically,   in raw human milk and in raw goat or cow milk, we all of those nutrients and immune products, they're all active.  

Nutrients   and immune products, they're all active.   But when you moved over when it was changed over to pasteurized   milk,   most of those have got none present or damaged or altered slightly,   but there is none of them that gives you the full benefits of raw milk, basically.   So I'll get off my soapbox   because we've yet to try it. I mean, you know, he could. Some people have been like, well, you know, you could give him that, and he could be really unsettled,   his tummy. And I gave him some almost raw milk a few weeks ago. And in the evening, he said, I'm not feeling very well. And he was just a bit anxious,   actually. But I was concerned thinking, oh my god. I hope that milk isn't gonna make him poorly.  

Anyway, we were chatting about this. And then,   he gave me these names, and he was talking to me about a guy.   You've probably heard of him. Well, I'd never heard of him. David   he's called.   And he created,   like, a medicine,   that supposedly cured cancer,   reverted autism and stuff like that, and he was put in prison.   He is on my list to do a deep dive into, actually. I really want to look into   his work.   But because, like, autism is very,   sensory   and heightened experiences and stuff, Obviously, the food we're eating   will well, I think sometimes my son can have his outburst and stuff because he's always literally lived on all day sugar,   and don't shout at me because   we have tried every   eating thing,   every method,   almost like the GAPS diet, not that severe, but I'll give him a regular meal. If he's hungry, I'll eat it. No. He won't. He would go dazed. He won't eat.  

So there was a point when he'd nearly choked as well so that   he had a fear for food then. And he actually went to the point when I was bringing his lunches home from school, and I thought, what's going on? They were like golf ball sized of food. He'd been eating a sandwich, kept biting it and chewing it, but he was too scared   to take that final   swallow.   And the one thing that he would eat were these disco   rings, biscuits, party rings they're called.   And for about 4 days, I sent him to school. They're like little miniature packets. Were those in with his lunch?   And as a parent, you feel bloody awful, absolutely awful.  

But learning   since then that some of these children,   they're actually   fed by a drip because their sensory side to food   is so, you know, is so limited. They won't eat anything. We were at the point that he was licking an ice cream, but he would try and spit it out after.   It was scary. He lost a lot of weight. And now   I think he's eating a pan of chocolate. That's his main go to. He's eating. I would   wish that it was something healthier, but it is what it is.   We did manage to get through the whole 4 days of just eating   party ring biscuits,   but it's not a nice position. I think there's picky eaters, and then there's those really picky eaters that people really don't understand.  

I would just put it in front of him and eat it. No. He won't.   When you get to that point and your child's not eating, it's pretty scary.   You know, he did   3 days with flu last year, and I couldn't get him to take any medicine. And I know lots of people say that's a really good thing because you just let the body sweat it out and get rid of the virus.   But that's what I'm talking about, limitations. We won't taste things, and I'm not gonna pin him down and force these things into him.   Because there was a couple of times he went to his dad's, and then his dad would try and engage and be like, right. This is a healthy meal. You're gonna eat it. And he would sit there for an hour at the dinner table.   That's by his ignorance,   and it's not his fault.  

You hear more and more about it these days, but back in their day back in the day,   it was, this is what you have to eat. If you don't eat it, you go hungry. So he kind of thought that approach would work   on our son, but, actually, it was just awful because then he would say, well, if you don't eat it, I'm gonna put it in the fridge and you'd have it for breakfast.   And,   obviously, when I found out about this, it's like, he won't be coming over if you're gonna be like that. I think it's taken him a long time to realize   you just have to accept some things   how they are. And it's actually quite you know, lots of people, what we like to do is go out and have a nice family   meal, and that's what we like doing eating.  

But I would go out and take, like, sausage rolls that you would eat, and I would be, could you warm those up for them for me, please? I don't care anymore.   I don't care what people think.   And if we go or, like, on a day,   let him have a plate of Yorkshire puddings. And I had a really good conversation with the chef because he'd never heard of   I I always say it wrong. It's either or,   but it is this severe, like, eating problem.   And there's just too many people that just think, oh, you've got a bit of a picky eater.   And, you know, some people say, oh, I've known people that were bought up on Chris, and look at them now. And that's true. And my son, he's a he's a good solid size now, but I do have to keep him active   now because we're getting to that age as well, a little bit of puppy fat, and he's noticed it. He's doing more. But I would love more than anything to get fruit into him and things like that, but it is what it is.  

So I have babbled on long enough. We are coming up. We've got a few minutes left.   I don't I don't think I said yet. If there was anybody listening that has a story to tell   or could recommend somebody that might like to be a guest or if you've got any life hacks,   do leave me a voice note if you like. It's not that scary.   I could just AI it so you, you know, give you a totally different name. I'm at that point. I might just read 1 each week and,   yeah, make up a name. But then it just doesn't make it real, does it? I want it to be real, and that's why I like to do this   live. But I do accept that speaking to people in all these different time zones,   that cannot always happen.  

Well, it can't happen. You know? Well done to Chanel   Chanel Janel   for setting alarm and getting up at 2 o'clock in the morning. Credit to her. I don't think I would do it. I did stay stay up late one night till about 11 o'clock.   And that's not really that late at all, but it felt late enough for me.   So, amazingly, I do have 2 guests already lined up for next week, and that seems to be how I run.   So it'll be a few weeks I've got guests. But I'm also just, like, taking it in my stride now. I'm not getting stressed. This is a hobby. This is something I do   share a bit of information, try to meet   inspiring women. You never know. There might be the odd man that comes on,   just for something a little bit different.  

Just the odd man.   But,   yeah, it's what I do. I enjoy researching, looking at other inspiring women. And, actually, I find it's like a bit of a therapy session each week. I think, what do I wanna learn about?   I'll source a guest.   But   excuse me.   Anyway,   I am rabbiting on. So I've got 2 guests. I've got Tracy Barnes,   who was on last week. She's gonna do part 2. Last week, she talked to talked to us about working in the care home with COVID.   And, well, it was just horrendous for us. She did 12 shifts on the trot and,   having to say people couldn't visit their family and stuff. It was a real struggle.  

But we got to the point of when they were gonna push   all of the care staff   out for not having a COVID vaccination.   So part 2 this week, we're gonna be she's gonna be telling us her story about that.   And I do so remember it well because I was doing supported living work, and,   there was one place that wasn't making it   compulsory to have the jab. I could only work for 1 company in various settings.   And but I am that person.   I would go and live in the woods. You were not gonna put that in me.   And I know lots of people say, oh, I had to do it for my job. I had to I totally get that. I totally get that, and I respect it because I know a lot of people did that unwillingly and have suffered because of it. But, I was lucky, I suppose,   and I'm a great believer in the universe will provide,   but there was no way I was taking that COVID jab.  

So after Tracy next week, there's a young lady, haven't got a name to hand,   but   she   is   deaf,   and from a young age, suffered a lot of,   what's the word? Turmoils,   not tragedies, but she's got a wonderful story how she now helps other people with disabilities and stuff.   So I will be back the same time   next week.   Have an awesome,   awesome   week.