Originally broadcast on: http://radiosoapbox.com Radio Soapbox
Women's Hour broadcasts live every Sunday at 7:00p.m. uk time.
A weekly chat show dedicated to womens stories
In this heartfelt and inspiring episode, we welcome Mariah, a courageous woman who shares her incredible journey from a tumultuous childhood to overcoming addiction and finding hope. Mariah opens up about the abuse she faced as a child and how it led her down a path of substance abuse, starting with smoking and drinking, and eventually escalating to harder drugs like OxyContin and heroin. She candidly discusses the struggles of being in abusive relationships and the heartbreaking experience of her child being born with withdrawals due to her addiction.
Mariah's story takes a turn as she describes hitting rock bottom, facing homelessness, and enduring multiple overdoses. Despite these challenges, she found a glimmer of hope and strength through faith, which eventually led her to a faith-based rehabilitation program. This pivotal moment marked the beginning of her recovery journey, where she found solace and purpose in helping others who faced similar struggles.
Today, Mariah is a devoted mother and wife, pursuing her education to become a therapist while actively working as a trauma and life coach. Her story is a testament to resilience and the power of transformation, offering hope to those who may feel lost in their own battles. Mariah's journey is a reminder that change is possible, and her dedication to helping others is truly inspiring.
Join us as we delve into Mariah's story of survival, redemption, and her ongoing mission to support others in their healing journeys.
[00:00:00]
Unknown:
Hey. How are you? I'm really good. Thank you. How are you doing?
[00:00:05] Unknown:
I'm doing good.
[00:00:06] Unknown:
Good. Great stuff. Thank you for coming on. You've got a few stories to tell, haven't you? You're one of those incredible women that I like to invite on the show to give your story and, well, give people some hope as well.
[00:00:22] Unknown:
Yes. Absolutely.
[00:00:24] Unknown:
So tell us a bit about yourself, Mariah.
[00:00:28] Unknown:
Yeah. Sure. So, well, whenever I, I I it start my life started out pretty rough as a child. My stepmom, had started abusing me from, like, 3 until 9. And so between then, I was just it's kinda like, you know, whenever you're going through something and your brain kinda blocks out, like, a whole time frame, That's kinda what happened there. And so I do remember parts of it, but the majority of it, I don't remember. She even at one point put a curling iron on my head and held it there, and I had a a big scar on top of my head. So that was kinda like the beginning of, like, my life. My mom was married a lot, so we moved around a bunch. And during one of her marriages, I had a stepbrother, and he, had abused me. He started, you know, touching me and things like that that I didn't really think was wrong at the time. I didn't really understand, but I started using, like, I started smoking and drinking with him.
And that's kind of where things took off until we about 15, and we I moved back to West Virginia. The people who were using the, who were smoking and drinking were also doing pills. And I know that pea a lot of people say that, it isn't a, like, weed isn't a gateway drug, but it, for sure, a 100% was for me.
[00:02:18] Unknown:
And it led you onto harder drugs?
[00:02:21] Unknown:
Yes. Yep. Absolutely. They, mostly started out with pills and then stronger pills. And by the time I was, 18, I started taking a really strong, type like OxyContin. It was one of my boyfriends was like, hey. You wanna try this? And, so a lot of women that I speak to actually, most of them say that it would it happened through a boyfriend or through a accident that they had. It started with pills, and then, you start getting sick whenever you don't have them, Shelley. So you start having withdrawals and imagine having the flu times a 100 and somebody walks up to you and they say, hey. I have something that'll make you feel better instantly.
You would take it. Right? Absolutely. So the first time I remember waking up the first time, and I was sick. And I was like, oh my gosh. I had the flu, babe. And I'm I'm, you know, talking to my boyfriend at the time, and he's like, oh, no. You're just dope sick. And I was like, what is that? Like, that's when I knew, okay. I have a problem. Like, if I'm having withdrawals, I have a problem. So that's about 19 is whenever I I realized that I actually had a problem. Because the pills before, like, the smaller ones, I never really had that issue with those. So it was really weird for me.
[00:03:52] Unknown:
So moving forward, you went from one troublesome situation which resulted resolved in your child being adopted. Yeah. And you've got your child back now?
[00:04:06] Unknown:
I do. I do. He is with me, and he is fantastic. Bless you. He is so amazing. Yeah. I, so I've the guy who I started doing this stuff with, I, he was very abusive and, extremely violent, extremely, like, bipolar. I don't wanna say bipolar because I'm not sure if that was his diagnosis, but, I mean, it seemed that way. He would be extremely violent, and then it was the cycle. Right? We go through these cycles of an abusive relationships where they love us and they make us feel whole again, and then they tear us down and bring us back up. And it's it's like a you get so, comfortable in these these chaotic and abusive and, like, addictive lifestyles that you don't really like, normal seems weird to you. I remember looking at my mom and being like, how and other people, like, how can they function? How can they be normal? Like, I just it confused me because I was so comfortable in the chaos.
But, anyway, so I ended up getting pregnant. I was back at I had met her so I had split up with him a couple times, and, one of the times I had met a drug dealer. He was 10 years older than me, and he actually passed away 2 years ago from an overdose. But he is actually the father of my son. And so, but I stayed with the abusive guy. You know, I was I was back and forth between them, like, dating them back and forth. I wanted to be where the drugs were. Right? And so, if the drug dealer wasn't giving me drugs at the time, I would go back to the abusive guy because I knew he would have them. But, anyway, so I ended up using while I was pregnant with my son, and he came out and he had withdrawals. And, Shelly, I have seen a lot of really bad things in my life and still to this day, I think that was probably the hardest thing I've ever seen in my entire life is watching this this innocent newborn baby who just came out of you know, came into the world, and he's sitting there suffering and knowing that I did that to him.
It's still like, the the thought of it in my mind still breaks my heart to this day.
[00:06:45] Unknown:
Oh, bless you. And guilt as a parent, I think we all feel there's things we could have done differently. Guilt, on the other hand, I think, is also a good thing because it makes us realize. But then it's done. It's done. And you've grown from it. You wouldn't be the person you are now. So carry on. You had your baby this year. He was suffering. Bless him.
[00:07:06] Unknown:
Yeah. He was. And, as soon as you know, they took him away, to be in the NICU, but they didn't take him from me, because there were no I quit 2 weeks before I had him. So there was no signs of drugs in my system. So they you know, I told them that I had you or I was in a Subutex or Suboxone program at the hospital for a while, and they just accounted it to that. So I didn't lose him then. But as soon as I got home from the hospital, my boyfriend at the time, was like, here, I know you're in pain, and I started the the heroin use again. So I I I forgot to mention this. The drug dealer that, I was with whenever I met him around, 19, the pills were getting so expensive at this point that he was like, you wanna try heroin, and I swore. Like, I watched Intervention as a child, and I swore to myself that I would never do I would never do this. And then, okay, well, I did this, but I'll never get to this. Right? So I did hair. I started heroin. And then by the time after my son was born, I was IV, heroin.
And so it just was, really the first 6 months that I had him was really it wasn't that bad, but I was still using, and I got my own government housing apartment. And my the abusive boyfriend that I had, he gets really violent whenever he's drinking, and, he was drinking one night. My son was about 6 months old. And, he was the my boyfriend, he was flipping furniture over. He was just so angry about something. And I grabbed a hold of my son and backed up into a corner. And I said he started coming towards me, and I was like, you're not gonna hit me with him in my arms. You're not gonna hit me. And sure enough, he not he punched me so hard in the face that I fell to the ground with my son.
And then he called my mom and broke my phone and left the door wide open to the apartment that I was staying in. And that's whenever I lost, guardianship over my son whenever he was 6 months old, and it just my entire life just kinda spiraled right from there. It got, pretty dark.
[00:09:39] Unknown:
And presumably, you've gotta go through the darkness to come out the other side.
[00:09:43] Unknown:
Yeah. Yeah. I, it was, like, so after that happened, I started come I went back to the drug dealer and, you know, started using heroin and meth together. And, eventually, we split ways, and I was at a gas station one night. I I was homeless. I had every time I was at my mom and my grandma's house, I would be stealing from them and very important, like, very sentimental things I would steal from them because I just was not myself. I mean, I just was I was either you know, most of the time, I was sick, whenever I stole, so I would be I would go there and steal from them. So they've cut me out of their life at this point. I'm homeless, and I'm at a gas station. And this older man comes by and he's like, hey. Do you, need a ride somewhere? And I was like, yeah. Sure. You know, I'll, go sleep in the park because I was sleeping at a park at this time, in West Virginia. And, he in the car, he basically asked me, you know, hey. You, if you do this, then I'll give you money. And so, I started cross I learned that I could get money from doing that. And for the next 5 years, I was, I was homeless and I was a prostitute, and I overdosed 12 times. And I I every time I went to see my son, I would be like, I really wanna get sober. And so I attempted rehab 26 times, by the time I was 25.
Gosh.
[00:11:26] Unknown:
26 times. Wow. Wow. And what was the final straw then? How did you make that breakthrough?
[00:11:35] Unknown:
Yeah. So, I feel like I hit I wanna say, like, rock bottom, but rock bottom, sometimes for addicts who are super persistent, like, you think you hit rock bottom and then a trap door falls through. And so it just things just kept happening. I I I had overdosed one time. It was in the ICU. They didn't think I was gonna make it. I had sepsis at one time, and my whole body had swollen up. I every time I woke up from an overdose, I would look in my pockets for more drugs. I mean, it was, I was very, very lost. I had completely lost all dignity, and I honestly, Shelley, if if I'm gonna be honest, it was the thought of completely starting over again and having responsibility and having no I I was like a baby out in the world.
I didn't know that I could finally I I didn't know that I could be, you know, quote unquote normal again. But I finally I was really angry with god, my entire life, or my drug addiction, portion of my life because I thought he was the reason for everything that I went through. And so, I actually got down on I was at some strange man's house, and I was about to take a shower. And I got down on my knees, and I locked the door. And I said, okay, god. If you are real, because I don't believe that you are, and I'm really angry with you, but you're my last shot right now. If you're real, then you can prove yourself to me, and you can help me get out of this. And if you do help me get out of this, I'll return the favor somehow. I'll be a soldier for you. I'll do whatever it is that you want me to do. I don't care. But if you're truly real, get me out of this now. I can't do this anymore. Right? I mean, I was, like, at a completely broken and shattered hopeless state in my life, and I had nowhere else to turn. All of my family had moved away at this point, and I was on my own.
And so, I, right before this too, I had went through a and and I don't want to trigger anything from anybody, but I just went through a really I got myself in a situation where multiple men were involved and, I was left for dead. And this was about, a month after that. And so 2 weeks after I prayed, I got arrested, and I got a felony, a drug felony. And I was so happy. I know it sounds weird, but I was so happy to go to jail because it meant shelter, because it meant food, because it meant sleep. I wasn't worried about the withdrawals because I kinda had cheated the system and went through detox in so many different times that I knew how to go in there without withdrawals. And so I was just kinda happy to to go to jail because it was like, I can breathe. I have food, and I know that, you know, I I probably know half the women in there. Like, we're good.
So
[00:15:10] Unknown:
yeah. Wow. So how long did you have to stay in for?
[00:15:17] Unknown:
So I was there for about 4 months, and then, I ended up getting out on, probation for 2 days, and I overdosed twice in 2 days. And, I,
[00:15:35] Unknown:
sorry. My daughter's right here. No worries.
[00:15:38] Unknown:
Okay. So I got out for 2 days, and I overdosed twice in those 2 days. Come on. Give me a second. Okay? And then, I got in trouble with my probation officer. So she put me back in there.
[00:15:55] Unknown:
Hi. Oh, hi. Wow. She's sweet. Bless her.
[00:16:00] Unknown:
Baby. Sorry. So, anyway, I ended up telling her I'm willing to like, I plead guilty, so I got I did get the charge. I said, you can you can plead guilty and you can get out again, or, you know, you can, fight this for a year and maybe you can get it all drawn off. I was like, get me out of here. So, they found a faith based rehab to go to, and I was so angry because I was like, okay. Yeah. God, you got me in jail at this point. Right? Like, okay. I guess. But then you're gonna send me to a faith based. That was my only option. I could go to this year long faith based rehab, no phone, no cigarettes, which I was mad about.
No secular TV, no secular music. We wouldn't go anywhere except for church. I was mad about it, but I was ready to get out of jail. Like, it would be freedom, but, you know, kind of not in my eyes. And so, I went there and they let me out, and it was the as soon as I got there, like, I felt like I could breathe, and everybody just walked up to me. And I'm £98 soaking wet. I mean, I was I was, like, knocking on desk door. And so I, got there, and they had baked me a cake. I mean, it was it was, that was cut that was my turning point as soon as I walked in there. And I knew I was court ordered there, or I would have to finish out my 15 year sentence. And so it was like, get rooted here. And, everything changed from there.
[00:17:56] Unknown:
And you found God?
[00:17:58] Unknown:
I did. Yes.
[00:18:00] Unknown:
Was it was you still, like, quite in denial? I've I've so I can imagine because I went to church last Sunday. I don't go very often. And I went with a friend, and everybody was so very welcoming. And I think it's a place where people root for when they've got no other help. Yeah.
[00:18:16] Unknown:
It really is. Yeah. I, you know, I was stubborn for about the first three months. I told everybody they were loony tunes, and I said, this isn't real. This is stupid. This is, you know, I'm I'm just going along with everything because I have to, and I'll be, like, cordial, but I'm not going to, like, I'm not gonna be in the church, like, raising my hands or acting. I'm not gonna do all that. And then I, was I see. And then I was in the, in this group one day, and they asked me to share my story. And whenever I did, 4 women came up to me bawling their eyes out, and they told me that they never thought anybody else had gone through these things before.
And I just felt like, okay. Maybe this is okay. Like, I think I was scared, Shelly. I think I was scared for the 1st 3 months because I was like, I'm gonna get through this, but then I know I'm just gonna get out and and get high again. That's all that I know. Right? And then I started to feel hope, like, oh, well, maybe my story can help other people. And so that's kind of where my mind started shifting. I started reading in the bible, which the King James version, is what I had read my whole life, and I never or, like, tried to read, and I never understood it.
I see, baby. And then, I found that it a different version, an NLT version, and I started to understand what it was saying. And that's kind of I have my own relationship with God. I don't really go to church because a lot of, Christians or people who call them not all, but a lot of, Christians that I have met, have really hurt me, and they don't want me to talk about my story. And they can be very judgmental. So I totally believe in God now. He has saved my life. I have my own relationship with him. But, it's, yeah, it's I I don't go to church.
[00:20:35] Unknown:
No. I I don't think I think you find God wherever you are. And I'm still, you know, I'm still in the midst of all of that. I do think that there's something. And if I believe in Jesus, then surely I must believe in God. I don't know. The mind's a wonderful thing. But so tell us tell us about where you're at now then because, well, you've just had a complete turnaround. You're doing good. Yeah. So what are you doing with yourself now?
[00:21:01] Unknown:
Yeah. So, after I I stayed there for a year, and then I actually stayed an extra year to help the LinkedIn network. Yeah. I mean, it I really had a big turnaround. I really loved, I really loved helping the women coming in because to see me in them, you know, old me in them, and they're so broken. I and, you know, some of them were willing to come in, and some of them just did not want to at all. And so, it was really good to help them coming in. But as soon as I got out, I had I got my phone back, and I, met my husband now, my now husband.
And, I was I had a I got a job, and I was really working towards trying to get my son back, because he had been with my grandma and my mom, this whole time. And that really tore me up to, like, how do I be a mom again? And so, anyway, I I got pregnant, whenever after I met my husband. And, the same year that I moved in with him and I had my daughter, I got my son back. Then I learned how to be a mom and a wife and just kinda like an a normal functioning responsible adult. It took me about a year to figure that out. So we moved down to Georgia from West Virginia and I felt God tugging at my heart after a while.
Like, hey. Remember whenever you said that soldier thing? So I was like, yeah. Let's do it. So I applied for school to be a therapist. And then I, so I'm still in school. I'm working towards my masters, but I didn't wanna wait that long. So I learned that I could be a trauma coach, and I could be a life coach, and I could, help others while I'm waiting to get my degree. So I got 15 plus certifications. And today, what I do is, I'm just, I'm a stay at home mama. I'm a wife. I, take care of the kids, and I do homework. And I'm trying to, help women who have also been through trauma, addiction, and loved ones who are affected by addiction as well.
[00:23:26] Unknown:
Wonderful. Have you written a book?
[00:23:28] Unknown:
You need to. Gosh. I know. You're, like, the 20th person to tell me that. I really do. I I do need to sit down and write it because I, I wanna approach it differently because, I wanna talk about my life, but I kind of wanted to write it from, like, a different perspective too. You know? And I'm trying to figure out what that would be to keep them interested and not just reading about me, like, how I can apply it to their life as well. So I'm working on that. I'll get to it once. You let me know when you've done that,
[00:24:00] Unknown:
and we'll do another interview. Oh, but it's such an inspiration. And when I saw your name pop up and the information, I was like, oh, I've got to talk to this woman. Oh. Because we need to hear stories like this of hope and survival. So many people have had it rough, but when you can turn it around and, you know, like you say now, you're a mom, you're a wife, and you said earlier, you're building your chicken pens and goose coops and everything. You're living. Yeah. Yeah. And life is being kind to you, I hope.
[00:24:31] Unknown:
Yeah. And and whenever I talk about my, like, whenever I talk about my story, I don't even recognize that person. You know, I can't imagine life without my kids now or my husband. I just I I honestly, truly, I can't. And so whenever I talk about it, it's I never thought that I would be where I am today, and it it's really weird to talk about. And some people, you know if if somebody can hear one thing that clicks for them, I think it's totally worth it. And and, also, it's also good for, you know, parents or spouses, or just any loved ones, who have an addict in the family or, a loved one. I think it's it's really good to see this side of it too because it's I think my family went through more pain than what I did because I was numb.
[00:25:25] Unknown:
Yeah. And they had to watch you and weren't able to do anything. Yeah. Oh, bless you. Well, I'm glad you're out on the other side. We've got a roundup, Mariah. Where can people find you, Lovely?
[00:25:38] Unknown:
Yeah. So I have a, I have a website. It is awaken her coaching.com. My Facebook is Mariah Petri, And then my Instagram's the same thing. It's at Mariah Petri.
[00:25:56] Unknown:
Wonderful stuff. I will include these with the show notes when I upload it in a moment. Awesome. Lovely. Lovely. So are you doing lots of podcasts and stuff?
[00:26:07] Unknown:
Oh my gosh, Shelley. So I I've posted in there before, and I usually only get, like, 1 to 2 responses, but I haven't been as vulnerable as I was this last time. So I figured I'm gonna post on 3 different podcast groups, and, I'm gonna be more vulnerable this time. Right? And, oh my gosh, Shelley. I have, like, 40 people asking me, and I have I'm booked up until, like, November trying to put every I'm very grateful. Wow. I'm so grateful. But, yeah, I'm, it came all at once, and I'm like, ah. The time was right. The time was so right.
[00:26:51] Unknown:
Well, thank you so much, Mariah, for being a guest. And, we'll have to make contact again at a later date and see how you're still progressing and talk more in-depth about your life coaching. And I'd like to talk to you about all those books that are in the background. I love books, and I can imagine they're all to be lots of help y well, self help books and things.
[00:27:11] Unknown:
Yes. Yeah. My daughter has sensory processing disorder, so she has,
[00:27:16] Unknown:
you know, sensory issues. A little bit. Yeah.
[00:27:19] Unknown:
Really? Wow. Yeah. It's chap mole. Yeah. More,
[00:27:22] Unknown:
more prevalent these days. Okay. Yes. That sounds so good. Thank you so much for having me. No. You're very welcome. Good luck on your journey, and I'm sure you're gonna inspire many, many people. Thank you so, so much. You're welcome. You take care of yourself, lovely. Thank you for being here. Too. Bye bye. Bye. Bye. Bye bye.
Hey. How are you? I'm really good. Thank you. How are you doing?
[00:00:05] Unknown:
I'm doing good.
[00:00:06] Unknown:
Good. Great stuff. Thank you for coming on. You've got a few stories to tell, haven't you? You're one of those incredible women that I like to invite on the show to give your story and, well, give people some hope as well.
[00:00:22] Unknown:
Yes. Absolutely.
[00:00:24] Unknown:
So tell us a bit about yourself, Mariah.
[00:00:28] Unknown:
Yeah. Sure. So, well, whenever I, I I it start my life started out pretty rough as a child. My stepmom, had started abusing me from, like, 3 until 9. And so between then, I was just it's kinda like, you know, whenever you're going through something and your brain kinda blocks out, like, a whole time frame, That's kinda what happened there. And so I do remember parts of it, but the majority of it, I don't remember. She even at one point put a curling iron on my head and held it there, and I had a a big scar on top of my head. So that was kinda like the beginning of, like, my life. My mom was married a lot, so we moved around a bunch. And during one of her marriages, I had a stepbrother, and he, had abused me. He started, you know, touching me and things like that that I didn't really think was wrong at the time. I didn't really understand, but I started using, like, I started smoking and drinking with him.
And that's kind of where things took off until we about 15, and we I moved back to West Virginia. The people who were using the, who were smoking and drinking were also doing pills. And I know that pea a lot of people say that, it isn't a, like, weed isn't a gateway drug, but it, for sure, a 100% was for me.
[00:02:18] Unknown:
And it led you onto harder drugs?
[00:02:21] Unknown:
Yes. Yep. Absolutely. They, mostly started out with pills and then stronger pills. And by the time I was, 18, I started taking a really strong, type like OxyContin. It was one of my boyfriends was like, hey. You wanna try this? And, so a lot of women that I speak to actually, most of them say that it would it happened through a boyfriend or through a accident that they had. It started with pills, and then, you start getting sick whenever you don't have them, Shelley. So you start having withdrawals and imagine having the flu times a 100 and somebody walks up to you and they say, hey. I have something that'll make you feel better instantly.
You would take it. Right? Absolutely. So the first time I remember waking up the first time, and I was sick. And I was like, oh my gosh. I had the flu, babe. And I'm I'm, you know, talking to my boyfriend at the time, and he's like, oh, no. You're just dope sick. And I was like, what is that? Like, that's when I knew, okay. I have a problem. Like, if I'm having withdrawals, I have a problem. So that's about 19 is whenever I I realized that I actually had a problem. Because the pills before, like, the smaller ones, I never really had that issue with those. So it was really weird for me.
[00:03:52] Unknown:
So moving forward, you went from one troublesome situation which resulted resolved in your child being adopted. Yeah. And you've got your child back now?
[00:04:06] Unknown:
I do. I do. He is with me, and he is fantastic. Bless you. He is so amazing. Yeah. I, so I've the guy who I started doing this stuff with, I, he was very abusive and, extremely violent, extremely, like, bipolar. I don't wanna say bipolar because I'm not sure if that was his diagnosis, but, I mean, it seemed that way. He would be extremely violent, and then it was the cycle. Right? We go through these cycles of an abusive relationships where they love us and they make us feel whole again, and then they tear us down and bring us back up. And it's it's like a you get so, comfortable in these these chaotic and abusive and, like, addictive lifestyles that you don't really like, normal seems weird to you. I remember looking at my mom and being like, how and other people, like, how can they function? How can they be normal? Like, I just it confused me because I was so comfortable in the chaos.
But, anyway, so I ended up getting pregnant. I was back at I had met her so I had split up with him a couple times, and, one of the times I had met a drug dealer. He was 10 years older than me, and he actually passed away 2 years ago from an overdose. But he is actually the father of my son. And so, but I stayed with the abusive guy. You know, I was I was back and forth between them, like, dating them back and forth. I wanted to be where the drugs were. Right? And so, if the drug dealer wasn't giving me drugs at the time, I would go back to the abusive guy because I knew he would have them. But, anyway, so I ended up using while I was pregnant with my son, and he came out and he had withdrawals. And, Shelly, I have seen a lot of really bad things in my life and still to this day, I think that was probably the hardest thing I've ever seen in my entire life is watching this this innocent newborn baby who just came out of you know, came into the world, and he's sitting there suffering and knowing that I did that to him.
It's still like, the the thought of it in my mind still breaks my heart to this day.
[00:06:45] Unknown:
Oh, bless you. And guilt as a parent, I think we all feel there's things we could have done differently. Guilt, on the other hand, I think, is also a good thing because it makes us realize. But then it's done. It's done. And you've grown from it. You wouldn't be the person you are now. So carry on. You had your baby this year. He was suffering. Bless him.
[00:07:06] Unknown:
Yeah. He was. And, as soon as you know, they took him away, to be in the NICU, but they didn't take him from me, because there were no I quit 2 weeks before I had him. So there was no signs of drugs in my system. So they you know, I told them that I had you or I was in a Subutex or Suboxone program at the hospital for a while, and they just accounted it to that. So I didn't lose him then. But as soon as I got home from the hospital, my boyfriend at the time, was like, here, I know you're in pain, and I started the the heroin use again. So I I I forgot to mention this. The drug dealer that, I was with whenever I met him around, 19, the pills were getting so expensive at this point that he was like, you wanna try heroin, and I swore. Like, I watched Intervention as a child, and I swore to myself that I would never do I would never do this. And then, okay, well, I did this, but I'll never get to this. Right? So I did hair. I started heroin. And then by the time after my son was born, I was IV, heroin.
And so it just was, really the first 6 months that I had him was really it wasn't that bad, but I was still using, and I got my own government housing apartment. And my the abusive boyfriend that I had, he gets really violent whenever he's drinking, and, he was drinking one night. My son was about 6 months old. And, he was the my boyfriend, he was flipping furniture over. He was just so angry about something. And I grabbed a hold of my son and backed up into a corner. And I said he started coming towards me, and I was like, you're not gonna hit me with him in my arms. You're not gonna hit me. And sure enough, he not he punched me so hard in the face that I fell to the ground with my son.
And then he called my mom and broke my phone and left the door wide open to the apartment that I was staying in. And that's whenever I lost, guardianship over my son whenever he was 6 months old, and it just my entire life just kinda spiraled right from there. It got, pretty dark.
[00:09:39] Unknown:
And presumably, you've gotta go through the darkness to come out the other side.
[00:09:43] Unknown:
Yeah. Yeah. I, it was, like, so after that happened, I started come I went back to the drug dealer and, you know, started using heroin and meth together. And, eventually, we split ways, and I was at a gas station one night. I I was homeless. I had every time I was at my mom and my grandma's house, I would be stealing from them and very important, like, very sentimental things I would steal from them because I just was not myself. I mean, I just was I was either you know, most of the time, I was sick, whenever I stole, so I would be I would go there and steal from them. So they've cut me out of their life at this point. I'm homeless, and I'm at a gas station. And this older man comes by and he's like, hey. Do you, need a ride somewhere? And I was like, yeah. Sure. You know, I'll, go sleep in the park because I was sleeping at a park at this time, in West Virginia. And, he in the car, he basically asked me, you know, hey. You, if you do this, then I'll give you money. And so, I started cross I learned that I could get money from doing that. And for the next 5 years, I was, I was homeless and I was a prostitute, and I overdosed 12 times. And I I every time I went to see my son, I would be like, I really wanna get sober. And so I attempted rehab 26 times, by the time I was 25.
Gosh.
[00:11:26] Unknown:
26 times. Wow. Wow. And what was the final straw then? How did you make that breakthrough?
[00:11:35] Unknown:
Yeah. So, I feel like I hit I wanna say, like, rock bottom, but rock bottom, sometimes for addicts who are super persistent, like, you think you hit rock bottom and then a trap door falls through. And so it just things just kept happening. I I I had overdosed one time. It was in the ICU. They didn't think I was gonna make it. I had sepsis at one time, and my whole body had swollen up. I every time I woke up from an overdose, I would look in my pockets for more drugs. I mean, it was, I was very, very lost. I had completely lost all dignity, and I honestly, Shelley, if if I'm gonna be honest, it was the thought of completely starting over again and having responsibility and having no I I was like a baby out in the world.
I didn't know that I could finally I I didn't know that I could be, you know, quote unquote normal again. But I finally I was really angry with god, my entire life, or my drug addiction, portion of my life because I thought he was the reason for everything that I went through. And so, I actually got down on I was at some strange man's house, and I was about to take a shower. And I got down on my knees, and I locked the door. And I said, okay, god. If you are real, because I don't believe that you are, and I'm really angry with you, but you're my last shot right now. If you're real, then you can prove yourself to me, and you can help me get out of this. And if you do help me get out of this, I'll return the favor somehow. I'll be a soldier for you. I'll do whatever it is that you want me to do. I don't care. But if you're truly real, get me out of this now. I can't do this anymore. Right? I mean, I was, like, at a completely broken and shattered hopeless state in my life, and I had nowhere else to turn. All of my family had moved away at this point, and I was on my own.
And so, I, right before this too, I had went through a and and I don't want to trigger anything from anybody, but I just went through a really I got myself in a situation where multiple men were involved and, I was left for dead. And this was about, a month after that. And so 2 weeks after I prayed, I got arrested, and I got a felony, a drug felony. And I was so happy. I know it sounds weird, but I was so happy to go to jail because it meant shelter, because it meant food, because it meant sleep. I wasn't worried about the withdrawals because I kinda had cheated the system and went through detox in so many different times that I knew how to go in there without withdrawals. And so I was just kinda happy to to go to jail because it was like, I can breathe. I have food, and I know that, you know, I I probably know half the women in there. Like, we're good.
So
[00:15:10] Unknown:
yeah. Wow. So how long did you have to stay in for?
[00:15:17] Unknown:
So I was there for about 4 months, and then, I ended up getting out on, probation for 2 days, and I overdosed twice in 2 days. And, I,
[00:15:35] Unknown:
sorry. My daughter's right here. No worries.
[00:15:38] Unknown:
Okay. So I got out for 2 days, and I overdosed twice in those 2 days. Come on. Give me a second. Okay? And then, I got in trouble with my probation officer. So she put me back in there.
[00:15:55] Unknown:
Hi. Oh, hi. Wow. She's sweet. Bless her.
[00:16:00] Unknown:
Baby. Sorry. So, anyway, I ended up telling her I'm willing to like, I plead guilty, so I got I did get the charge. I said, you can you can plead guilty and you can get out again, or, you know, you can, fight this for a year and maybe you can get it all drawn off. I was like, get me out of here. So, they found a faith based rehab to go to, and I was so angry because I was like, okay. Yeah. God, you got me in jail at this point. Right? Like, okay. I guess. But then you're gonna send me to a faith based. That was my only option. I could go to this year long faith based rehab, no phone, no cigarettes, which I was mad about.
No secular TV, no secular music. We wouldn't go anywhere except for church. I was mad about it, but I was ready to get out of jail. Like, it would be freedom, but, you know, kind of not in my eyes. And so, I went there and they let me out, and it was the as soon as I got there, like, I felt like I could breathe, and everybody just walked up to me. And I'm £98 soaking wet. I mean, I was I was, like, knocking on desk door. And so I, got there, and they had baked me a cake. I mean, it was it was, that was cut that was my turning point as soon as I walked in there. And I knew I was court ordered there, or I would have to finish out my 15 year sentence. And so it was like, get rooted here. And, everything changed from there.
[00:17:56] Unknown:
And you found God?
[00:17:58] Unknown:
I did. Yes.
[00:18:00] Unknown:
Was it was you still, like, quite in denial? I've I've so I can imagine because I went to church last Sunday. I don't go very often. And I went with a friend, and everybody was so very welcoming. And I think it's a place where people root for when they've got no other help. Yeah.
[00:18:16] Unknown:
It really is. Yeah. I, you know, I was stubborn for about the first three months. I told everybody they were loony tunes, and I said, this isn't real. This is stupid. This is, you know, I'm I'm just going along with everything because I have to, and I'll be, like, cordial, but I'm not going to, like, I'm not gonna be in the church, like, raising my hands or acting. I'm not gonna do all that. And then I, was I see. And then I was in the, in this group one day, and they asked me to share my story. And whenever I did, 4 women came up to me bawling their eyes out, and they told me that they never thought anybody else had gone through these things before.
And I just felt like, okay. Maybe this is okay. Like, I think I was scared, Shelly. I think I was scared for the 1st 3 months because I was like, I'm gonna get through this, but then I know I'm just gonna get out and and get high again. That's all that I know. Right? And then I started to feel hope, like, oh, well, maybe my story can help other people. And so that's kind of where my mind started shifting. I started reading in the bible, which the King James version, is what I had read my whole life, and I never or, like, tried to read, and I never understood it.
I see, baby. And then, I found that it a different version, an NLT version, and I started to understand what it was saying. And that's kind of I have my own relationship with God. I don't really go to church because a lot of, Christians or people who call them not all, but a lot of, Christians that I have met, have really hurt me, and they don't want me to talk about my story. And they can be very judgmental. So I totally believe in God now. He has saved my life. I have my own relationship with him. But, it's, yeah, it's I I don't go to church.
[00:20:35] Unknown:
No. I I don't think I think you find God wherever you are. And I'm still, you know, I'm still in the midst of all of that. I do think that there's something. And if I believe in Jesus, then surely I must believe in God. I don't know. The mind's a wonderful thing. But so tell us tell us about where you're at now then because, well, you've just had a complete turnaround. You're doing good. Yeah. So what are you doing with yourself now?
[00:21:01] Unknown:
Yeah. So, after I I stayed there for a year, and then I actually stayed an extra year to help the LinkedIn network. Yeah. I mean, it I really had a big turnaround. I really loved, I really loved helping the women coming in because to see me in them, you know, old me in them, and they're so broken. I and, you know, some of them were willing to come in, and some of them just did not want to at all. And so, it was really good to help them coming in. But as soon as I got out, I had I got my phone back, and I, met my husband now, my now husband.
And, I was I had a I got a job, and I was really working towards trying to get my son back, because he had been with my grandma and my mom, this whole time. And that really tore me up to, like, how do I be a mom again? And so, anyway, I I got pregnant, whenever after I met my husband. And, the same year that I moved in with him and I had my daughter, I got my son back. Then I learned how to be a mom and a wife and just kinda like an a normal functioning responsible adult. It took me about a year to figure that out. So we moved down to Georgia from West Virginia and I felt God tugging at my heart after a while.
Like, hey. Remember whenever you said that soldier thing? So I was like, yeah. Let's do it. So I applied for school to be a therapist. And then I, so I'm still in school. I'm working towards my masters, but I didn't wanna wait that long. So I learned that I could be a trauma coach, and I could be a life coach, and I could, help others while I'm waiting to get my degree. So I got 15 plus certifications. And today, what I do is, I'm just, I'm a stay at home mama. I'm a wife. I, take care of the kids, and I do homework. And I'm trying to, help women who have also been through trauma, addiction, and loved ones who are affected by addiction as well.
[00:23:26] Unknown:
Wonderful. Have you written a book?
[00:23:28] Unknown:
You need to. Gosh. I know. You're, like, the 20th person to tell me that. I really do. I I do need to sit down and write it because I, I wanna approach it differently because, I wanna talk about my life, but I kind of wanted to write it from, like, a different perspective too. You know? And I'm trying to figure out what that would be to keep them interested and not just reading about me, like, how I can apply it to their life as well. So I'm working on that. I'll get to it once. You let me know when you've done that,
[00:24:00] Unknown:
and we'll do another interview. Oh, but it's such an inspiration. And when I saw your name pop up and the information, I was like, oh, I've got to talk to this woman. Oh. Because we need to hear stories like this of hope and survival. So many people have had it rough, but when you can turn it around and, you know, like you say now, you're a mom, you're a wife, and you said earlier, you're building your chicken pens and goose coops and everything. You're living. Yeah. Yeah. And life is being kind to you, I hope.
[00:24:31] Unknown:
Yeah. And and whenever I talk about my, like, whenever I talk about my story, I don't even recognize that person. You know, I can't imagine life without my kids now or my husband. I just I I honestly, truly, I can't. And so whenever I talk about it, it's I never thought that I would be where I am today, and it it's really weird to talk about. And some people, you know if if somebody can hear one thing that clicks for them, I think it's totally worth it. And and, also, it's also good for, you know, parents or spouses, or just any loved ones, who have an addict in the family or, a loved one. I think it's it's really good to see this side of it too because it's I think my family went through more pain than what I did because I was numb.
[00:25:25] Unknown:
Yeah. And they had to watch you and weren't able to do anything. Yeah. Oh, bless you. Well, I'm glad you're out on the other side. We've got a roundup, Mariah. Where can people find you, Lovely?
[00:25:38] Unknown:
Yeah. So I have a, I have a website. It is awaken her coaching.com. My Facebook is Mariah Petri, And then my Instagram's the same thing. It's at Mariah Petri.
[00:25:56] Unknown:
Wonderful stuff. I will include these with the show notes when I upload it in a moment. Awesome. Lovely. Lovely. So are you doing lots of podcasts and stuff?
[00:26:07] Unknown:
Oh my gosh, Shelley. So I I've posted in there before, and I usually only get, like, 1 to 2 responses, but I haven't been as vulnerable as I was this last time. So I figured I'm gonna post on 3 different podcast groups, and, I'm gonna be more vulnerable this time. Right? And, oh my gosh, Shelley. I have, like, 40 people asking me, and I have I'm booked up until, like, November trying to put every I'm very grateful. Wow. I'm so grateful. But, yeah, I'm, it came all at once, and I'm like, ah. The time was right. The time was so right.
[00:26:51] Unknown:
Well, thank you so much, Mariah, for being a guest. And, we'll have to make contact again at a later date and see how you're still progressing and talk more in-depth about your life coaching. And I'd like to talk to you about all those books that are in the background. I love books, and I can imagine they're all to be lots of help y well, self help books and things.
[00:27:11] Unknown:
Yes. Yeah. My daughter has sensory processing disorder, so she has,
[00:27:16] Unknown:
you know, sensory issues. A little bit. Yeah.
[00:27:19] Unknown:
Really? Wow. Yeah. It's chap mole. Yeah. More,
[00:27:22] Unknown:
more prevalent these days. Okay. Yes. That sounds so good. Thank you so much for having me. No. You're very welcome. Good luck on your journey, and I'm sure you're gonna inspire many, many people. Thank you so, so much. You're welcome. You take care of yourself, lovely. Thank you for being here. Too. Bye bye. Bye. Bye. Bye bye.
