Disorganized Productions "Chaos creates Harmony"

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In this episode of the Disorganized Productions Podcast, I, Rob, host a deeply moving conversation with Sheryl Sturis, a licensed psychotherapist and breast cancer survivor. Sheryl shares her incredible journey of overcoming breast cancer and the challenges she faced with the medical system. She opens up about her experience with the "medical mafia," her decision to refuse certain medical procedures, and how she advocated for herself to receive the care she needed.

Sheryl discusses the emotional and physical toll of her diagnosis and treatment, including the impact on her self-image and the importance of mindset in her healing process. She emphasizes the power of self-love, positivity, and surrounding oneself with supportive people and environments.

Throughout the episode, Sheryl shares personal stories and insights into her spiritual journey, including her connection with God and how her faith has guided her through difficult times. She also talks about the importance of gratitude, agency, and the belief in alternative therapies.

Listeners will be inspired by Sheryl's resilience, strength, and determination to live life on her own terms, as well as her commitment to helping others through her work as a psychotherapist. This episode is a testament to the power of the human spirit and the importance of advocating for oneself in the face of adversity.

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Skip me branch like squirrel, baby.  

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What we're dealing with here is a total lack of respect for the law.  

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Welcome fellow human to the disorganized productionist podcast.   The show that fuels your spirit,   ignites your potential, and   helps you become the best version of yourself.   I'm your host,   Rob, and each episode   will embark you on a journey to unlock the power within you, tap into your limitless potential   and conquer life's challenges.   No. It's just now. Just now. You you're fine.  

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And they're all gonna wonder why we're laughing because it said recording in progress.   I I was doing a little beatbox, and I'm not gonna do it again.  

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Right. What did he talked about? Right? So,   another show of this old Nas products is this time from the middle of the desert in Arizona.   Talking to a beautiful woman that I met a few   months ago. Be in another channel, Emma channel, Emma channel, and we did some great stuff together already.   We got some great conversations.   Yeah. I'm in the middle of   the in the middle of the desert.   Yeah. Please   warm   welcome   for Cheryl Sturtis.  

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Yeah. Thank you, Rob. Thank you, Rob.   And I just think it's apropos   that we're doing the podcast when you're in The States  

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because It's really strange. Right? Because we're we're   maybe six hours,   the eight.  

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And you were in The Netherlands and you were in The Netherlands, and that was nine hours, right, difference or something like that? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, you gotta do what you gotta do. Right?  

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Because   Cheryl,   we're going to have a great time together as we always do.   Cheryl is a survivor of breast cancer   and a medical   mafia   survivor.   We gotta   pinpoint that right to where it is.   And she's a psychotherapist,   soul care and identity   work. That is what she loves. That's what she loves to do.   And,   please introduce yourself a little bit to the audience, Cheryl, if you want. Sure. So like you said, I'm a licensed psychotherapist.  

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I I,   I could see couples if I wanted, but there's too many egos in the room, and I I don't enjoy it. I like this one on one thing, and I soar there. So I'm gonna stay in the lane that I soar in, and I'm gonna leave people who soar with couples.   And and Yeah. You know, family. They they can do that. I I I'm gonna stick with what I'm doing.   Right. So that's what I do for a profession.   I live in Northern California.   I just turned 60 in September,   which I'm very proud of,   because of what I've done with myself,   physically, mentally, spiritually, all of it.  

I remember when I was going to turn 55, I was in the car, and I was like, James,   pull out your calculator.   I needed to subtract something. And I took whatever year it was at the time, and I said, now subtract 1964.   And I saw I go, oh, never mind.   Never mind. And then I said, I'm about to be 56.   I'm about to be 56.   Oh, 56.   So I was already, like, you know, putting this doom and gloom   or   over, you know, becoming another year Tell them to be prophecy.   There there you go. And so we'll get into that a lot,   in this podcast because I do want to start off with,   how much Alovea has done for me because,   what the medical mafia did to me almost killed me. Not the cancer.  

Not the cancer.   When you when you see the go ahead.  

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So for people at home,   Cheryl's gonna show some of   the pictures that she went through with the breast cancer.   It's not for the faint of heart at all. That's right. I'm gonna warn you. This is not this is not like,   nice,   nice pictures.   But it wasn't a listening.   Cheryl explained in every detail what happened to her,   and how she got out and,   how she shines like bright like bright diamond right now   because, she she's been through some shit.  

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Yeah. And and let me tell you, showing those kind of graphic pictures, especially because it is, you know, your private areas,   which we won't we we that will show what happened to her, and then this is the reconstruction. She stays out of the out of the limelight,   because Nicole has been an extremely   modest person when it comes to exposing   those areas of my body. Not that I, you know, have not worn   shirts that show a little cleavage or something like that. I'm not saying that. I just mean in turn even with my family.   Even with my family. And when I was a teenager and people be swapping stories or and I'd be like, oh, that's just weird. I just didn't understand.  

So I've always been extremely modest.   When when,   I had to see a new doctor,   I shocked her because she was telling me we're gonna have another mammogram. Or she said, it's time for another time for your mammogram. It's past due. I go, oh, no. No. No.   We we won't be doing those anymore.   And she says, well, you have to. I said, no. I don't have to. I don't have to, honey.   Right. I I said when when we went through this whole process before, they said,   that it didn't get enough and we had to do an ultrasound. So why why start off with something that's not gonna give me the answers anyway? So we will not be having a mammogram.   I will agree with an ultrasound. She goes, well, it won't be approved. And I said, well, doc, then we have a problem.  

That that wouldn't be approved. I want you to think about that. If that wouldn't isn't approved, I said, so,   I'm gonna show you something. I I know that you're a doctor and you're you're used to seeing people   without their clothes on, but you're usually ready for it because you're gonna you you're walking you'd knock on the door, got a robe on. I said, well, I don't have all that, but I'm about to lift up my shirt. I I want you to get ready.   So so I lifted up my shirt and held it above my head just like this the whole time.   And I talked and told her every single thing that I had been through and my chest and having to pack a wound and take can't even take a shower. Don't you? I just went through it all.  

And then as soon as I was done, I went and then my voice changed again. I said, so we will not be having another mammogram, ma'am. At your face.   She was fucking shocked. Right? Well, she was just like yeah. It was shocked. Like, it was a she was just like   like, there was just she didn't know what to think or say because it she I'm sitting here.   She was about two feet from me.   K. So it'd be like me and you sitting at the dining or the dining room table, and I just live there. Right? So Right. She was close and personal, heard all that. I put it down, and I said, so we will not be having another mammogram.   We will not be having any more trauma.  

So and she said, Well, it's not gonna be approved. And I said, Like I said, doctor, that's a problem. I said, So   why don't you try being my advocate?   Why don't you put in your notes everything that I just showed and told you   and see what they say? Well, within a couple of days, she had an approval.   So I think she learned from our interaction   that just because you have a protocol and they are bound   by protocol, which is why she didn't cut out   we'll get there. Right. We'll get there. Mhmm. So,   it's important to me that people understand   why this modest woman   is   exposing her chest   and,   I got a little teary eyed there for a second.  

Yeah. Okay. It's The the trauma that she went through in in that in that way, that's how important it is for me for people to know   how to take care of their own body and have agency. And and these doctors, we pay for their salary, but they won't be able to even be a doctor if they don't follow their protocols.   So I am hoping, Rom,   that what I, you know, that what is coming in this world right now are is the truth.   The truth about alternative therapies and all of these things that we need to use. I just saw Phil on the background.   Right.  

Sorry. I had to do that real quick because I just saw him.  

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Yeah. Phil, you want a bath?  

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What? Well, I saw you.   I saw you. Hear you because you're going right in my hearing aids? Oh, gotcha. Gotcha. You just make sure and tell my step by.  

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Cheryl just wants to say hi to you.   There he is. That's   Escango. Hi, Cheryl.  

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Hi. You tell him that I love him from the bottom of my heart.  

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She loves you from the bottom of her heart. Mhmm. Mhmm.   I would do that other thing, but I don't wanna look like Hitler.   Yes. Much love, my friend. Thank you. Proud of you.   Yes.  

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Yeah. I got shield down my legs.  

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Good.   Good. Kundalini   vibrations. Right? Yes.   Yes. Okay. So   let's let's   let's get let's get into it.   When were you,   for the first time at a doctor's place, when you felt like something wrong with my breast or was it like a   normal,   jack? No. What is that? What? No. K. You're probably wondering why I'm smiling   about finding tumors because I'm smiling. I know for sure that,   the the things that I've been through in my life   and a lot of people that I know that smile   do not have the reason to smile at all, but they smile like bright shine diamond.   That's for sure. That's what I know.  

So I know that behind that smile, there's a   there's a story.  

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There is a story and but the smile is so genuine because I didn't find the tumors   traditionally.   What happened see, because   what when COVID happened and I had to come home to work,   I finally realized that there was a rat race.   And I finally realized that I was be being treated like a rat who was trying to get a morsel of cheese at the end of every day.   And I said, wait   a I talk out loud by myself in a room. So this actually I go,   wait a minute.   I never signed up to be in any rat race. And newsflash, I ain't a rat.   I ain't a rat.  

So when I learned that,   I'm like, oh my gosh. So when people were pulling going back, I was like, no. I'm gonna hold off. I'm gonna hold off. And they were, well, you might lose your office. You might I'm like, well, I will.   I didn't lose my office. I gained a sanctuary, so I don't know.   So, I but because I got out of the rat race   and I already was working so much on being present in my thoughts, I wasn't present in my body.   Then I start so I real there was a quite of a transition that happened to me in terms of being grounded and present,   observing, and all of that. I just honed it. K? And as I was learning about the world and   we we won't go into all the conspiracy theories today, but a couple of them will come   out because Right. Well, I lived it because I lived it. So how did I find the tumor?  

Took the shower,   got out of the shower, went to go hang up my my towel.   Actually, it was like anyways, went to go hang up my towel, and the light must have just been coming through the window on the mirror at just the right angle   because I'm telling you, I just went like this, and I went, wait. What was that?   I saw an indentation,   a like, a little dimple on that I'd never seen before, and I go,   that's not good, and the words breast cancer came in my head. I went, oh, shit. Oh, fuck. And you know what? I'm getting chills right now because I know   what I know   what I'm Intuitive.  

Right? Yes. So   alright. I went, okay. So then I did lay down and do the and I'm like, oh, boy.   There's something. It was pokey.   Uh-huh. And I'm like, that's not good. Well, one of my best friends had just,   become   a bushy license yet, I think so, an ultrasound tech.   And so I called her and I I didn't have insurance or anything.   So I I called her and I said,   I think I found something on my right breast,   and I don't have insurance.   And so I was wondering if there's any way that I could come in and you would   won't say your name as I got to go into a Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That was totally closed. And she did not only did she do an ultrasound here, dude, she did an ultrasound all the way from my neck   all the way, and she said Right. So the whole butt cheek up. And other than that,   she said, Cheryl, you don't even have a plaque in your arteries.  

There was a little bit something with my gallbladder, which I go, well, yeah, I know I've had an issue with the gallbladder. So she I know she kinda gave me a whole, you know, overview of what what what's going on inside.   So   when she found when she showed the tumor on the ultrasound, we she she didn't say anything. I could see it. She could see it, but neither of us wanted to say it. We saw something else. And then when they finally did the all the other testing and everything, I did have three.   Right. So I found that tumor   because   I'm in touch   with   myself   and my creator,   and I am grounded enough to observe my environment   Yeah.  

Not get   hoodwinked and tricked by all the obfuscation and deception that they that is just everywhere. It's it's everywhere.   So I found the tumors.   I couldn't see a doctor until I no. Wait a second. That's why I had to pay cash.   Because I was still part of the UCD system,   but I didn't have any insurance. My doctor had retired, so I saw this guy   end up being a really neat guy.   Good.   And because I had the photos from the ultrasound from my friend, everything got fast tracked because my daughter was in the room. So he does the whole you know, he goes, oh, yeah. We so he tells me we're gonna get the blood work done. We're gonna do all these tests.   Mhmm. And I can hear in his voice that   this is just gonna be like a normal protocol time. I go, well, can I come show you something? Because I didn't want my daughter to see. So I walked over, and I showed him, and he he just goes, yeah. Well, what I'm gonna go ahead and send you over to get your blood work done right now.  

Uh-huh. Oh, we got all the testing done that day.   And,   I was able to go and see the doctor,   all cash,   for the the the cancer department of UCD.   They took all my I wish. I came from a family with meager beginnings. You know? We're hard workers.   I wish I would have included the picture of all the hands of the generations as the women in my family are strong. So are the men. But I'm a woman, so I'm testing for that.   Right. Now it just made me lose my train of thought.  

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So so you were at the, at the doctor's office. You got all the, Oh, here we go. Yeah. The   the the the the tests and all that back. You paid cash for it? Yeah. Well, I paid cash for the initial the initial  

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appointment for him to to refer.   When I Right. I called the cancer department, and they they couldn't see me because I didn't have insurance.   Ah. But they took all my money to diagnose   me. So what I mean by that what I was talking about my family is we we I've never had money. It took me forever to go to school,   you know, and,   I finally, for the first time in my life, had built up a savings of $6,000   Sick. I had $6,000   in my savings. And they took all my money to diagnose me. And then   they said they they denied my treatment.   They denied   my treatment because I didn't have insurance.  



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Why? Because you didn't have insurance. Because I didn't have insurance.   So Oh, wow.  

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So my the same friend   love you, honey. I don't wanna say your name, but I love you, honey.   She referred me to somebody who did,   insurance health insurance.   And just so happened I'm not tell when I called Friday and left the message,   he didn't call me till Monday. And he said on Monday, if you if I would have talked to you on Friday, I would have had to tell you there was nothing I could do for you.   But it just so happens   that governor Newsom just today has open, opened up the open enrollment again for the pandemic.   So we can get insured by July 1. I go, woah. Woah. Woah. Woah. Woah. Are you did you just tell me you're gonna have me insured by next week?  

Oh,   he said yes.   So there was there's another miracle there.   Then the guy tells me that I know this insurance is really expensive, over a thousand dollars a month.   Oh. I know oh, my dove is there. Hold on. This is really hold hold on. Hold this is I can't believe this has happened. I haven't seen it forever, and I got a picture I'm gonna show you.   Can I get   it? Okay. I'll explain that in a minute.   See, I don't miss things, honey.  

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Uh-huh.  

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So I I forget sometimes, but, thankfully, that doesn't happen as much as it used to. So they denied my treatment. I couldn't have insurance.   Happened to be able to get insurance,   within a week's time because of   Gavin Newsom. He did something good. He did something good, and and I benefited from it.   And the guy that sold it to me   tells me that a girlfriend he had had years ago   had a rare form of breast cancer,   that they didn't have treatment in this area. So she ended up having to move,   it's it's about 40   miles south, I think.  

Right. But she she had to relocate there so she could this insurance   would pay for and they would do the treatment that she needed.   And everything he was and she's still alive today. So it was like there was such a for the fact that he had a girlfriend that had the same form,   all that stuff. All you know, it's just yeah. It's just just coincidence  

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is not coincidence.  

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And if people if people wanna think that, then they're gonna have a whole lot of coincidence they never find meaning for, and   they're gonna believe in luck, and   and and I'm sorry about that.   So,   they denied my treatment, got insurance.   And so when I met the doctor,   you know, she was it was pretty clear. She they they they said, when you have this type of type of cancer, it's a it's good news   because they have so many treatments. Well, then after the fact, when I when they're talking about the other treatments, I'm like, no. We won't be having those. That's not good news to me.   So  

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Okay. Okay.  

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So where I met with her. She told me the type of cancer it was, and I to be honest with you, I don't even I don't register it in my head.   I don't register it. I'll just tell you that it wasn't spread through my body.   And, when they actually did the surgery, they did take a little bit out of my lymph nodes to make sure there's nothing in my lymph nodes. So nothing spread.   Right. I had the it was positive for hormones till estrogen was a problem,   for cancer. And that has to it's a whole Yeah. I won't even go into any of that because it's it it gets us in the weeds.   So I thought we're gonna go in. We're gonna have a mastectomy.  

They were gonna put what they call a spacer or something like that to keep the skin stretched so that once everything heals, you could have an implant.   And then Right. Once everything heals   a minimum of a year later, then I opt then I have an option.   I I can be a candidate for reconstruction   because they said I had to have a BMI. My weight, my age,   I could not have that surgery until   a year after recovery, and what they end up doing is giving me four surgeries within one year because of what they did. So they can do three more surgeries within that year if they screw up.   But if I just want to get this done, now they're gonna make me late. It's it's so when you put it all together. So we're about to get in the pictures here.  



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So Right. Right. Right. I have  

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I have the surgery   and just that. That was my first round of having to   you can't just jump in the shower, and that was a year of that afterward. You know? I didn't realize how long that was gonna be.   You have to use specials. The open wounds. Right?   Yes. Yes. That was a Well, in the beginning, but not in the beginning. Right now, we're just we're just healing the reconst we're I mean, healing the we they've taken out the cancer   and all the tissue. And when you see in a second, I I thought it looked like a hippopotamus, but I was but I was happy with the the shape and size and everything. And now I'm thankful because it would have been bigger. This is smaller   than I wanted to than I originally,   and and I'm so happy with it. So I'm glad that I don't have that.  

So,   it was all healed. I go for my follow-up.   Mhmm. I go for my follow-up.   See, before, I   when I was healing with with the,   mastectomy,   it wasn't open,   and I and and it so it already seemed like that was a big deal to have to shower like that.   Then once you have an open wound, it's a whole different thing. You gotta put metal different plastic. Oh oh my gosh. It's you have to Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Okay.   So when I went to her office and she   she was telling me how things went,   she should have told me from the beginning. She it was like she was trying to, like,   cushion the blow or something.  

But she says, well,   but we we didn't get all the cancer. And when she said that, I go,   what?  

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What?  

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Because I just went through hell, I thought, already.   With having two drains, you have two drains. You gotta drain them every day, and they're sticking out this I mean, oh, I'd already been shell hell.   It was so healed, and you'll see the difference.   And she says to get get all the cancer, and I I'm like, what?   Why not? And she said, well, you had that one tumor was really close to the skin, and I had   to scrape it off  

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Uh-huh.  

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Because it was so cool. And I tried to get it all,   but I didn't. And I can't tell you because I was in shock whether I said it or not or even registered.   Like, why didn't you just take it out? Why you know? But I said I must have said something to that effect because she said, because we were doing skin sparing surgery. You have to have sparing skin that stretches for you to put the implant in. So if she would've cut it, then I couldn't have had the implant.   And I said Okay. Okay. I said, okay. Okay. But I don't understand   because I told you what I said to her, I go, you can tell, you know, I liked I I liked a little, you know,   feminine, a little you know, I I care about my appearance, I said, but when it comes to this cancer, I don't care about the appearance. I want it gone. Right.  

So   that's not what she did. She left it in there.   What I didn't realize until   I was on the podcast with Max   Uh-huh. Why didn't I say, well, let's just why don't we just go in and cut the rest out instead of do rate? Because she goes, now we have to do radiation. And I'm like she goes, I never said because she saw my face. She goes, I never I never said that we were I go, I know what you said. He's I because I go everywhere with my clipboard.   Right. He said, I know what you said because you see they always take notes.   But forgive me. I'm a little bit shocked right now. You know?  

So I ended up having radiation   for   three months,   Monday through Friday.   And the last week Every single day.   Every single day.  

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Holy shit.  

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So here we go. So, actually, you're gonna have to give me permission to share screen. I hope oh, shoot. Yes. Share?  

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Mhmm. Let me see how this works out with the tablet.  

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I meant to do that right before we start recording.  

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Start recording or casting with Zoom.   Zoom will have access to the all information that is visible on your screen or played from your device, but, no, it's not this one.   Participants.   I'll just give you all the grant.   Cheryl? Cheryl, make host. Yes. I can make you a host.  

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Well, it just,   whatever you have to do so I can,   share on my end. I'm I'm Yes. I think you  

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should be fine doing that right now because I give you the permissions to Yep. To host. Yeah?  

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K. So   this screen oh, okay. Okay. Let me take a deep breath.   Okay. But I had to make it big.   Okay. That's big enough. So you see that pretty big. Yeah?   I don't see anything yet. You don't see anything? Oh, share. Here we go. Here we go. Here we go.   Okay. Yes.   No. I see your folder. Yeah. Yeah. So now we're gonna go here first.   That is when it first healed.   That's why I said it looks like you hit your bottom. Right? That Nope. That's great. The skin looks healthy.   Everything looks healthy. Deep oil. Even here, the redness, that is all new tissue. The scarring is already blending in with my skin. Everything looks great. Right. Everything looks yeah. Yeah.   Okay.  

Here we go.   So here is it healthy. Right here, that's all healthy.   K? Uh-huh. And this is the morning of   my I I was going in to get my first   booster.   The last five were booster radiation sessions, but I had to clean all this up to make it look like that in order to have radiation done. I had to clean all that up in the morning   and then go in like that.   Now this   is I had a video of it. That you'll see a bigger   piece of it in a minute, but it started out as a hairline, like, if if you start to bleed under the skin, like a hairline   vein, and then it just by by 03:00,   it was about,   the size of,   well, about three by three. Three or four. No? Okay. About three inches in diameter.  

And Right. I had gone to the   doctor,   I that day, and I showed him   what it looked like, and he told me numerous times. Now he was the he he was the resident.   And the doctor who was who was on the floor was in the room. She was standing over here, and he's standing right in front of me. And he he said it numerous times, and I said, are you sure, doc? Because my sister was worried about an abscess. She was worried this thing was I thought you guys are gonna be cutting this thing open. He goes, nope. And he pointed to it, and he says, I'm not worried about that.   And the doctor over here because I said I don't miss things. She I could see her. I could see her energy feel her energy, see it. And I looked over at her, and she goes, do you mind if I take a picture? I said, no. As a matter of fact, I'd appreciate that. So she took a picture of my breast   when he said, oh, I'm not worried about that. So I go home   from that appointment,   go to sleep that night,   and I woke up still dark.  

And I was like, I can't   I can't get   up. Because I worked the whole time.   I'm the first surgery, I You bet.   Yes, sir. I had three days off on my first surgeries,   and I think the other surgeries maybe one day.   So   Oh my god. I had to get up to go to work that morning. I'm like, I can't, well, go to work just in my other room. But still, you know, I'm working with people. It takes energy and thought and presence. And so Yes. I said,   Lord, I can't. I can't get up. I can't do it.   And I he reminded me of one of my other good friends that sent me a worship song, and so I played it, Rob.   And I don't usually do that because I I'm so,   connected that I'll get weepy sometimes if I listen to music, and I gotta get ready and put some makeup on. So, you know, I don't usually do that.  

Well, I did.   And as I was I I I'm telling you, I was in such a place of peace and calm, and then all of a sudden, I felt wet on my stomach.   And I went, what?   Like and I sat up, and then I could feel all and so I just grabbed my nightgown. It just went like this.   And went Right. Into   the bathroom   and and lifted up my shirt. And I'm not kidding you. It was like a faucet   that was a good inch in not an inch. That's that's I'm I'm exaggerating, but it seemed like it maybe maybe the about the size of my pinky or something. Uh-huh. It was shooting out with my, my heartbeat. Shooting out. Shooting out. And so I'm like, oh. So I ran back, got my phone, went in and start so by the time I started filming, a lot of it had come out, but it was dripping on the floor and   everything.  

Oh, shit. That was the morning after he said,   I'm not worried about that.   I'm not worried about that. Okay. So let me go back.   Four   nine.   I got that one. So now we're gonna go so   this is what it looked like. And I the reason I'm doing a a couple panels of pictures   is because I want you to see what was going on in my life.  

[00:32:33] Unknown:

Holy   shit, Cheryl.  

[00:32:35] Unknown:

This is me   while I'm like this.   Wow. I spoke to graduating,   going to his prom.   She is such a beauty.   Wow. And I got to help them plan their their senior prom, their senior ball. Let me let me get this, you know. And I was trying to make good homemade   food and   my dog, you know, wait till you see the last picture   that I have is of my dog looking at me with such love and consideration and worry.   My my daughter's friends.   How do you Oh, wait. Wait a second. They all showed up and brought these flowers, and they brought   healthy food to put in my refrigerator.  

Honey, my   the the people that showed up to love me and and and towards the end when I   had all those surgeries and I needed to have the reconstruction   because, honey, I had a 44 g   and then an a minus. A 40 and I'm not kidding you. I'm not VP, I don't know if you can well, you can. It it they went down to just above my belly button. They're they were big.   K? Right. So I was lopsided.   But there was why was I telling you that part? Oh, the surgery.   So, if I would've   if I couldn't have I had two months insurance. I was behind, behind, behind,   and I had to pay those two months insurance in order for them to schedule that surgery. And if I couldn't have done that, it would've went to January, and I would've had to pay 20 something thousand dollars plus for like, $25.  

And so little cribbing.   My friends   so so you you know because we have a we've we've talked before   about religion.   K? We've talked before about   God and Christ, and and I know that there is a lot in the church,   that   a lot of people don't understand. And there's there's good and bad in every institution.   But what I can tell you is the friends that that the house that I   worshiped at. Matter of fact, I just reached out to my pastor. I haven't seen him for a long time,   that I worshiped at for a really long time.   And the friends that I surrounded myself there,   they put on a   fundraiser for me, Rob.  



[00:34:58] Unknown:

Wow.  

[00:35:00] Unknown:

And showed up at my door with and when all was said and done, it was over $6.   Oh, I just realized that's how much I had my savings in the beginning.   So as God was my witness,   I was out in front of the house   and with my my one of my best friends and her husband, they're giving me this money, and   and, the holy the holy spirit told me to sing what I sang in my   in my bathroom all by myself   the night before.   And I'm and I Right. I'm I'm pacing back and forth, and Phil's going, what's going on, sister? And I'm like, the holy spirit wants me to sing at the top of my he's like, do it. Come on. You could do it. I'm like, I don't want to. I don't want to. And she's all, come on, sis. Come on. And then so I had my back to him, and I turned around, and   I said   and we all will sing sing the wrong song.  

How did it go now? Stop.   Cheryl   is blessed.   Beloved is blessed.   I am blessed.   Beloved   is blessed.   And this is to the enemy of my soul. And what did you think was gonna come out of this?   Gratitude   is the   essence.  

[00:36:25] Unknown:

Wow.  

[00:36:26] Unknown:

So that belted out of my   mouth without thinking anything in my bathroom all by myself,   And then I got God telling me in front of my house I gotta sing at the top of my lungs, and I did. And then I looked up and the new neighbors   that had just moved in a few months ago, the husband was up on a tall ladder hanging up his Christmas lights   looking over,   and I just said,   I hope you like my singing.   And I just got to,   not even a month ago. I was outside doing something, and he was out there with the kids. So I introduced myself.   I said, well, I can finally introduce myself. I tell you know? And I said,   well, the first time I saw you, you were hanging up your Christmas lights last year, and God told me to sing something at the top of my lungs. And I did wondering if you thought you moved into a crazy neighborhood.  

You know? And I got it. And so I said, just so you know, I was I was recovering from breast cancer, and my friends had just dropped a bunch of money off so I could have my last surgery.   And I could just see all over his face, and he smiled. He said, it's all good. It's all show. So I want you to know that that,   the people who came to my   side   all share my beliefs.   They may not have uncovered a lot of things I have,   but Christ is still my man.   Right. And you'll see that within this podcast.   So   this is what was going on amidst  

[00:38:00] Unknown:

having a cavern, and I'm not kidding you when you when I said No. That's for the people that are listening and don't see the pictures,   Well, just like Cheryl said, she had,   big groups, but there's a big hole. And as you said before we jumped on the podcast, you can stick your fist in it. Right?  

[00:38:21] Unknown:

Yes.  

[00:38:22] Unknown:

Yeah. That's how our next slide  

[00:38:24] Unknown:

And Swiss.   Go ahead. Sorry. Yeah. Continue. Yeah. Yeah. No. Go ahead. Go ahead, please. Well, I just want to say that while it was a gargantuan   cavern,   then   you can barely pit fit the,   width of my pinky in it now. And the only reason it has depth is because I am still   building tissue.   That's not normal.  

[00:38:50] Unknown:

Otherwise, yeah.  

[00:38:52] Unknown:

Yeah.   So this is as it's starting to heal. You can see how it's starting to come in.   Right. So I'm gonna say something funny here, and I really mean it. When it got down to where it was healing and everything and and it and it filling in and everything, and I showed my sister, Janet,   she goes,   oh my gosh, Cheryl. It looks so good. I go, I know. I thought it was gonna look like butthole.   She's she's  

[00:39:17] Unknown:

Right.  

[00:39:18] Unknown:

Laughing.   But that's part of the reason why you pack it   is to keep it. But then why did I leave this in? Again,   things I this is one of my things in my backyard, my succulents.   Well, this right here, I had gone with somebody to one of the high schools here, and it just so happened to be founded in 1964.   That's the year I was born, and that's one of the things that I kept seeing before I found the tumor. I kept seeing my birth year and seeing it mirrored over and over and over and over   and, before I found the tumor. And I don't let reckless things cross my lips because I know the power of my thoughts and my words.   And it was happening so much, and I look as I often do. If I'm gonna talk to God, I'll look up. And I go, I keep seeing my birth year and seeing it mirrored. Am I gonna die or something?  

And I did I'll stop. What the heck?   And then   within the week, I found the tumor,   the first tumor.   And then after I was diagnosed, I kept seeing my birth through everything. And then I was like, oh my god. I have to look up these numb you know? And so the biblical significance, and you can call them angel numbers. People call them different things.   But re it was all reassurance. It was all reassurance. And I still yes. So so I would take pictures every where I'd see it, and I'd when I went to radiation,   every single day on the way there and on the way back, my birth year would be on a license plate.  

My kids got to witness it. I got pictures. Oh, I it happened every single and I told you, three months, Monday through Friday.   We we were there.   Okay.   So   now what goes next?   8.   Oh, yep. Yep. Yep. Okay. So then what happened   +1, 23.   Then what happened? This right here where I'm circling,   point right there, there was infection that started coming through here.   Oh, shit. So So we had to start cutting stuff. That's why it looks like because we had to start cutting stuff in there. They had to start cutting in more and more and more in the,   and left. And then she he went to her graduation.  

See, life is happening.   And I'm I got cancer.   Looking pretty good for having cancer,   but my skin color is back now.   So   this right here, I hope I have. Do I   I may not have included it, but let me just tell you   that,   what I found out in the clinic   in in the,   when they were still helping me with my wound care,   she said I was showing her. I go, is this the the what have tissue built? Whatever. She goes, oh, no. That's the   the sling, s l I n g. That's the sling.   Okay. What the fuck is the sling? Yeah. Yeah. And I'm like, yeah. And she said, well, when you were going to have the implant,   it's like a hammock, like a sling. It was there to   hold it in place until   your own body did whatever.  

And she said, but we don't need that anymore, so I'm gonna pull it out.   And she did.   That sling   and I don't remember signing for this. I don't remember signing for this. That sling was made out of somebody else's DNA. Did they take their genetic whatever out of it?   So I had foreign something in my body. My body said no. It would not heal. Right. Right. After she pulled that out, after she pulled that sucker out,   my then it finally was a last phase of healing. I didn't have to take antibiotics anymore because I was taking antibiotics for seven months.  

[00:42:52] Unknown:

Wow.   So,   Cheryl, just,   briefly,   when was this happening? How many years ago?  

[00:42:58] Unknown:

Okay. So that's what I didn't say. Let me did I pull here? Yes. I did. Okay. So I was diagnosed   in March   of twenty two,   And I had my mastectomy in October   of twenty two.   Two. Right. Oh, yeah. My radiation in November of twenty two, and that lasted all the way through February of twenty three.   And by February   25,   I was in the ER   with my first Shit. For the for the first,   the first   removal of tissue where they had the cavern.   And then Right. I had,   a second ER on the twenty eighth.   They had to cut more out. And and I I can't believe I don't have those on here. Let me see if I do.   Hold on. Hold on.  

I don't think I   yeah. Well, I don't have it, but I there was   you can tell by the picture that that it is it's dead.   It's sick, and it's   dead. And and they were still trying to leave tissue in there because they thought I was gonna care about having which bump bigger than you know?   Yeah. So that was in February 20 that was, that was okay. That right there is about June of twenty of twenty three.  

[00:44:23] Unknown:

Twenty '3. So oh, so so it's like two years ago. And then I had my reconstructive surgery in March.  

[00:44:31] Unknown:

So from October of twenty two, I had the first I've had the mastectomy, the first surgery. In October of twenty three, a year later, I was having the fourth surgery, the reconstruction on the left. And it's it took me over a year to heal because of what they did   to my body, and that's what I'm saying. Alovea, I was all these testimonies, these great testimony. And I and the product is is it it it does what it claims because I've been taking it.   But they were pretty outrageous testimonies.   Well, I trusted Joel. I trusted Joel. I used to do his go on his radio station. It was my one escape, Rob.   I found him because he did the Jimmy Kimmel challenge, and then I went, oh, this dude is a brilliant bait and switch guy. He's gonna get some truth out.  

So, but then I I I saw him lie one day. Oh, wonder what he's talking about. What was his radio show? I'm like, oh, he has a radio show. You know? So,   and I was dancing in my backyard, and I started giving you know? Because I've   he he takes his his followers' comments and puts them in. You know? And I was having all these bangers, I thought, in my head. I'm like, Cheryl, you're just wanting to look cool. So I was in my kitchen, and I said, god, if there's something that I can say that'll that'll,   edify the whole and not glorify the one, let me let me say it. And he let me say that or he told, not let me say it. Well, you know, tell me what to say.   And he remind me right? Reminded me of when I had a bunch of my healing.  

I used to really criticize myself a lot a lot a lot a lot.   And,   when I I finally healed and and   I love who I am. I like my I enjoy my own company. I can say that. I know that may sound weird to people, but guess what? I don't care.  

[00:46:12] Unknown:

All one. Not alone, but all one.  

[00:46:14] Unknown:

Yes. Yes.   So,   okay. I'm losing my train of thought. Hold on.   I forgot what I was gonna say.  

[00:46:26] Unknown:

Oh, sorry. Yes. I skipped the wrench like squirrel.   Yeah.   So yeah. But,   so you went   back. It took, like, more than a year to recover from the,  

[00:46:39] Unknown:

from the impacts. So so you We were at the radio show. So the Yes. This is what he, this is what I end up saying.   I am me   without arrogance or apology.   Mhmm. I   am. Right? That's it. That's how we all should be, but because we are put in this rat race that's a comparison trap, and we got a jockey for position, and we're all   it it everything is in inverted, and so you you can't even   it's just crazy. It's crazy. So  

[00:47:11] Unknown:

Right.   You're listening to.  

[00:47:15] Unknown:

Yes. And so that was the escape. That was my escape. And then his advertisements   would be the Alabaya, and I'm like, gosh. I wish I could afford that. You know? And then I finally said, sure. I checked into it. I'm like, I gotta do it. I I I dropped my insurance. It was a thousand dollars down to a hundred dollars and something, and now I don't even have insurance. I don't even have it. I don't need it. I don't need it. Right. So I started taking You take it for yeah. You take it for other  

[00:47:44] Unknown:

stuff that helps you really, not for preventing for something that maybe not   not have have a job. Surely, no worries.   But, yeah, please continue.  

[00:47:55] Unknown:

Yeah. So the Alovea,   one of the main things I wanted to get across on Max's podcast, I wanna reiterate it here, is that,   when you hear all these grand testimonies, if you had a body like mine   that even before everything that happened with the cancer,   that I put my body through the ringer for from addiction, you know, from the remember, I smoked marijuana and drink alcohol and smoked tobacco for the first time when I was eight. There were a few isolated incidents. We ended up moving away, but then eventually we moved to Oregon to my   aunt's house, and there were cousins there. And my sister moved with us, and so   those,   things start happening again the summer before sixth grade.  

So by the time I was,   man, 16, I was an alcoholic   and   raging alcoholic   years later when I quit   when I was 30 years old, October   fifth '19 '90 '4 is when I put myself in treatment.   But before I quit, I was drinking a liter of whiskey a day, sir.   Wow. Not exaggerating.   Not exaggerating.   So I have that glass by my bedside. I had that on the the rim of the tub,   and   I was nobody could tell that I was under the influence until a certain point after I drank over half that liter, then you're gonna start seeing it. And towards the end of the night, you know   so that's all that my body had been through a whole lot, and I actually died from DTs   two years before I got sober. That didn't get me sober.  

My my well, he we ended up getting married. We're not married anymore, but he and I were boyfriend and girlfriend,   laid down and watched a movie. And the next thing I knew, I was standing   with the door open, the sliding glass door. He was standing on the other side,   and I   came to, and I'm like,   what's happening?   Hello?   Who's on the phone? Who's?   It's your mom. Mom? And he said, hang up the phone. We've gotta go. You died. I'm like, what? What?   So   my body went into DTs, and he went to call 911. And when he they were asking him questions, he said he said her lips are blue. He said they told him you better give her CPR.   So   Holy shit. Yeah. He brought me back to life. So,   I had already put my body through that. And then when I got sober   and I just I didn't know I was signing up for a rat race. No one ever told me, but that's that's what happened.  

And then it was the whole adrenaline, cortisol, stress, you know, but I just had to just pull up the bootstraps, keep going, pull up the bootstraps, keep going, pull up the bootstraps, keep going. Right. You know? And so look at what the first thirty years of my life, you know, chemicals of addiction,   then from 30 to so it how old was I?   58   when I got the 57, 50 eight?   See Uh-huh. You can be brilliant in some areas, and you can't even do basic math. We used to have this two years ago. K?   Right.   Wow. Oh, 30 sores of that and then twenty twenty eight more years of stress,   Alovea had a lot of catching up to do.  

Right. Is my point. So,  

[00:51:24] Unknown:

okay.   So you basically got   that's now been three years ago.   You got the  

[00:51:35] Unknown:

Technically,   it's only two, isn't it?   No. It's three Three Yeah. In that It's three. Last year So we're in the third year. Sorry. Last year of recovery is what throws me. Yes. Yes. So you you you you got recovered.  

[00:51:51] Unknown:

I wanna know   what it does because I know that you're very, very strong woman.   But what does it do   with your,   with your mindset? Once you see that,   one of the pieces that we see as a western world as a woman   with breasts,   that one of these things are,   not as they used to be in the mirror.  

[00:52:18] Unknown:

Yes.   So that that's a that's a loaded question because the mindset,   the just the mindset question itself is one thing. But then when you talk about the different aspects of what you're thinking about, the cancer itself,   death, life and death, your children,   what's gonna happen if. You know? And,   in all of that,   before   before I had actually been diagnosed and everything   or no. It was right after. It was after. They were telling me that that's what it was. The plastic surgeon's nurse   told me to go on this one website to look at the reconstructive   after photos because if I just go online, I'm gonna I'm gonna get myself all stressed out.  

So Right. I was looking at different   after photos. I'm like, oh, that's not bad. Oh, oh. So before   all this started,   I did think about what that was gonna look like. But once you really Uh-huh. Once you are diagnosed   and you're in it and everything, you're   the the appearance   is not,   it wasn't my concern. It wasn't my concern. Now I wouldn't go out in public because I couldn't wear a bra, and so I'm not gonna have a g forty four flopping around while I or I might hold it the whole time and all that. So   that whole No. Sighted thing. And here's the other thing. See, I I I'm I'm not gonna wear a bra. Right now, I have nothing on. K? And so and the reason I'm I'm doing that is because it needs to breathe. And I'm sure the underwires that I used to wear really were part of what started that those tumors.  

[00:53:58] Unknown:

So, Right. Right.   But like I said Sorry to interrupt you very Yeah. Very briefly.  

[00:54:05] Unknown:

Do you wanna show more pictures? Otherwise, we're going to it in in the, a picture. So, yeah, let me I I actually do. There's so this right here, I mean, put a the comment.   Okay.   This is after it started to heal   right there.   Right there. And then there's one more   oh, no. No. I might just go through.   So sorry to interrupt you. We Oh, it's okay. This is the one I wanted to show you. This is when it so so see how this is when my sister saw it and said how good it looked because I thought it was gonna really I thought it was gonna, like, invert,   but it keeps,   building. Right. And,   these are the doves I'm talking about.  

When I used to see them when I counsel. There was there are a pair of doves that go up on that eve over there.   And, I hadn't seen them for the longest time, and I I thought about that when I did this picture. And just this morning,   I took a picture. I'll have to see our TV via text or whatever.   So Right. You're doves, and it just so happens it is in a picture shot where this is all about my armor.   This is all about my armor.   So   and then I think this is the last one. That is pretty much what it looks like   about four months ago.  

About four months ago.  

[00:55:29] Unknown:

So   But it's healed now. Right?  

[00:55:34] Unknown:

Yeah.   Yes. Okay.  

[00:55:37] Unknown:

Yeah. And you got,   I'll be careful because you now,   are in your  

[00:55:43] Unknown:

mailbox and may Yeah. So what I'm gonna do is I'm gonna I'm gonna go back to here let's see. Stop share, and then I'm gonna go back again. I'll go back again.   So it's Yes. Yeah. So in terms of the mindset, honey, that I'm really glad you asked that because that's what we're gonna transition into.   When you are faced with something like that   We never we never   everything is filtered through it.   Yep. Yeah. Every single thing.   And you think about things that you haven't thought before, or have you had you think of them in a in a lot deeper level. But here's the here for me, here's the clincher.   When I   said, what's that?  

That's not good.   Breast cancer.   From that moment, I had to make a decision.   Right. From that very moment to not go into fear. And that's a hard thing to do   when you've just learned about the medical mafia the last year. Mhmm.  

[00:56:39] Unknown:

I mean Especially when you when you do not have any other   options   to give your life away to that   institution. Right?  

[00:56:49] Unknown:

Yes. And there were like, I looked, there's iridology.   There's there's different,   treatments for cancer,   but they're not covered with insurance and all of that. And I didn't like I said, I depleted the $6,000   just to get diagnosed. So   if I hadn't had my kids, one that was just about to he was in a senior year,   and my daughter   had just graduated in 2020. You know? The   I wasn't ready for them to lose me, let alone them being ready for them to lose.   And so I knew   I know so much about mindset   that I   knew what I what I   put my bridle on to ride, that's what that's where I was gonna ride.  

So I just stayed grounded, and I I I just put one foot in front of the other until I I got the diagnosis, then I just shared with my core family   what was going on. And   Uh-huh. At that point, you you have to decide   to believe. And so well, I'm gonna I'm gonna go I'm gonna share again. You have to decide to believe, dude. You you have to. Okay. So let's go back here   and share   this one. Okay.   So I surround myself.   I surround   myself with love and positivity.   I went camping. We have an annual camp out every year, and my niece,   my great niece and my daughter made this for me before any surgery or anything, and it's and it's got their initials. And on the other side of it, it says I got it right here, dude.  

Oops. I stopped it. Hold on. Okay.   Yeah. That's what you get when you try to get rocks that are shaped like hearts.   Okay. It rocks.   Oh, and I just shared the wrong thing.   Hold on. Oh. Oh, I closed it all out. Give me a second. Give me a second. I got excited.  

[00:58:48] Unknown:

That's good.   I mean, especially if you see the the journey that you have been through, a lot of people   are,   frustrated and irritated by life, by the things that went up to them. Right. With   the psychology that plays with them.   I didn't have bad breast cancer, but I had,   some things going on in my intestines. And when   they told me the options to about surgery, it was like, fuck. I mean,   I was in my forties,   looking good, but there was a prop probability that they wouldn't cut open from here   until down under for my pelvis, open it up, get the shit out, clean   it again.  

So that was something, like, I can't fucking   look myself in the mirror anymore when that's gonna happen. I'm gonna be, you know, stitched up and stuff like that.   Unfortunately, someone told me, like, you gotta,   you have,   the right for a second opinion, so please go to Germany. And I went to Germany.   So you did the same   surgery, but only with little points. So they they blow up.   So basically, they blow up with your belly button. They blow up the the the,   the skin.   And then with some some tools, they they take out the shit you did. They don't need a four and then they they gonna sew it up. There you go.   Yeah. Right? So that was a immense   that was a struggle.  

Yeah.   Even even if,   when you sign   the the a four paper   with all the things that could go wrong   with,   before your operation,   within the operation of surgery, and and afterwards, it was just like, oh, spark. I'm   I'm I'm hopefully, I'm gonna get out   good.   It took some time,   but I know that it takes a lot of mindset to get there where where I am now. And I know that's a   powerful mindset   when   when you have to face the things that you have to face. It's just compared   to me. It's it's it's  

[01:01:01] Unknown:

Well, you're bringing up a really important point because a mindset is out comes out of the frame of mind that you're in.   So if I would have had a diagnosis   the same diagnosis,   let's say,   twenty years before or whatever when I was married,   oh, honey, that would have because I was all about, you gotta look you gotta look just as good as you can. Right?   Right. I would have had it ten years before before I had graduated and got licensed   and that and the clincher, the the the main point is   if I would have had it before I realized who I am and it is good.   And that   no matter what's happening in this world, I can stay grounded and I can have agency and make my own decisions still.  

If I was not in that those those that frame of mind when I found the cancer, my mind set point that says set as we're going. It's like set. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It would have been different. K? So here is,   why what the things that I do.   Like, even this right here.   I got a jar here with all these little ribbons, and I've got these little spoons in here because my   my wife spun in her girlfriend,   you know, and I've got happy face balloons over there because I was a chauffeur   for my Uh-huh.   Birthday   and took them they did a picnic and everything. I have the chauffeur hat, and I couldn't the the thing didn't come in in time. It said,   something about the best chauffeur. So I wore my Metallica   shirt. You know? So I I was in my Metallica with my white gloves and everything, and she came out. And I had sunglasses on, so you couldn't see my eyes. And she said something high to me, and I didn't say nothing. I just I had my one hand like this, and I went like that with my white glove. And she goes, oh, this is all formal.  

You know? So,   I have those happy face balloons because they were all over in the car. I've got the teddy bears of my kids. They outgrew.   And I you Uh-huh. I know you've you've talked a lot about, letting go of things so you were not we aren't hampered. And and I I I believe in that. But if you were in my house,   there's no simplicity here. Every single inch you look, there is love and relationship.   Ah. So if if my house burned down, I just have more love and relationships,   put my little things out. So one of the things I have all over my house are heart rocks.   So if I go like let me do it this way. Like this, you'd think it was exactly a heart, wouldn't you? Well Yeah. Absolutely.  

Absolutely. Bro, but   they my family knows that I have heart all   over my mouth. Here's one here.   Here's one.   And then this one That rocks.   Actually a a rock that has a heart on it that is literally   raised up off of   the rock.   K? And   Wow.   My great niece and my daughter   made this.   And then on the one side oh, see that?   Guys, this is my   oh my gosh.   Oh my gosh.   My strength is returning. It's tripping me out. Okay. So it's 2022   here, and then it has where are their initials?   They're there. Got their initials here.   So they at '22, they told me I was a survivor before I even had the first surgery.   Yeah. Yeah. So and then she made   everybody in the whole camp got one rock, and I got two. That was the special one. And then she made me this   figure.  



[01:04:33] Unknown:

Oh, wow.   I love you. Yes.   Oh, nice.   Got Charlie Knight.   Right.   Wow.  

[01:04:49] Unknown:

Oh oh, it was the sun and the moon. Check her out.   The sun and moon.  

[01:04:54] Unknown:

K. Right.  

[01:04:58] Unknown:

I surround myself   no matter if it was coming to work.   I always say coming to work like I had to commute.   K.   This one?   Share.   Okay. So I have these, and then I when I took the picture, I'm like, oh, well, check it out. The shiny seed. That's a children's book that I wrote. I wrote that book.   And the shiny seed is about the gold seed that's planted inside of you, so it's in your heart.   And in that seed, you know, it had me with a microphone.   It had me with a microphone, and I didn't have one before.   It showed me as a teacher, as a counselor. It had all these thing you know, I showed a heart and,   because that's what's in that seed, and that's what you're supposed to express. Well, in the beginning of the book,   because I used to struggle with codefinity,   I'm like,   and I've got the big COD for codefinity.  

And my cape is just a wave in behind me. Well, at the end Right. Right. Off. And I give it to Christ, and I kneel down because   I don't need to be out saving everybody else. I need to get to know myself.  

[01:06:09] Unknown:

So  

[01:06:11] Unknown:

Mhmm. So, that would I go ahead. Go ahead.  

[01:06:15] Unknown:

So in your journey,   I think we can agree with that. If you're not gonna be surrounded yourself by positive energy and about,   especially,   if something like that happens to you that you still have,   you have to find yourself love to get through that. Yes. You if if you're not loving yourself, you're done.   I think that's one of the biggest   mindsets.   And just like you said, okay.   I I'm giving over. I do not have the power right now   to change it from my perspective   to do whatever I wanna do to to fix my health. So you have to keep it together,   with that, and you have to keep it together with the diagnosis you got.  

And no matter what the diagnosis is, it changed your life. That's why I say in my course, also change your life before it changes you. Because   you now could be a very healthy,   fairly human,   but that does not mean that you wake up tomorrow as a healthy one. Because the things that I saw, the things that you are describing   is, like, one day is completely different between the person that I was before and that I'm entering right now in that realm of the new time of of the the the,   the mindset,   but but also the trauma what comes with it,   especially the trauma.  

It's it's unbelievable   how strong you are and how much you shine on the pictures that you showed.   Mhmm.   I wanna ask you. So   you you're now   healed also from the reconstruction   of the of the breast?  

[01:08:02] Unknown:

Yes. It's healed, but like I said before, it's still building. So one of the things I learned in the clinics was that they do debridement. And what that means is   when you have a sore and it starts building up a scab and all that, you know,   it's if you don't do anything to it, it's just gonna do its own thing, pull the skin or whatever. But he or you could you can debris it,   keep have a healthy live,   bed,   and the tissue will continue to grow.   So I debris it myself  

[01:08:38] Unknown:

Right. Right. Basis.  

[01:08:40] Unknown:

And I have, here here's another thing too in terms of positivity.   So I have a couple other things I use because I,   I've learned a lot about what to use. But,   my sister in   Sweden   in Sweden.   She's in Oregon right now, but she did live in Sweden because she was married to somebody who was a foreign exchange student. She was in Sweden for many, many years. But, anyway, she's in Oregon.   This is   Jenny, if you watch this, I'm I hope I don't mess. Well, you could just joke and make fun of me again.   Oh, I think I'm gonna do right. Calendula. Calendula salve.  

[01:09:15] Unknown:

Calendula. Yeah. The gold Okay. Gold gold flower. I was calling it calendula.   Calendula. Yeah. I think it's a it's a both of them,   is so is so rightly pronounced.   You still No. It's   gold flower. There you go. Yes. There you go. So,  

[01:09:33] Unknown:

but the first thing it's   that it has in here, it says imbued with love.   You see? This is love calendula,   shea butter, vitamin e, almond oil, olive oil.   So my sister picked her picks her own stuff, and she put it together with the oils. And she when she picks her herbs, she's doing it with love. When she's everything she does with love. And so when I put this on,   I envision   her love going into this and then into my body.   So now I'm imbued with my sister's love.   Those are the kinds of things that that make so much importance. And so let me see if I can go these through these really fast.   That one.  

Here. Let me go get good at this. So, the screen that I'm looking at you on, the stand that it's on has all that there.   So I do believe that nothing is impossible.  

[01:10:31] Unknown:

Yes. K? Oh, is this   It's the keys.  

[01:10:36] Unknown:

Yes. And I probably can. Let's see here. Can we do it?  

[01:10:44] Unknown:

Oh, wow. You figured out, part that I didn't know.  

[01:10:48] Unknown:

There you go. You are exactly   where you're supposed to be.   And what does this say? What does this say?  

[01:10:57] Unknown:

Your future   looks bright.  

[01:10:59] Unknown:

There you go. So I may have had cancer and I may have had these things going on my body, but I have a bright future, and that's when I'm hanging my hat on. Then I had, you know, like, clients who were bringing me food   and sticking this stuff on my on the tops of the food, peace with God, healing on the horizon,   eyes   open. Oh. Oop. Oop. Oop. Oop. Oop. Oop. Sorry about that.   Brave enough.  

[01:11:27] Unknown:

So I think that this is a nice segue to get into   belief system, especially in a self fulfilling prophecy.   Because when you go and prove some shit,   you have to keep a positive mind, which is not easy at all, especially if you look at your,   your new body or about the trauma that you have from surgery. There's so many things that are,   and counting   that you   you have to embrace your mindset, but it's not easy at all. So what helped me   is,   and I knew a little bit about it, about the hope   I'm gonna pronounce it wrong. I know. Opoopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodopodop   it's a treatment. It's,   med meditation.  

I love you.   I'm sorry.   Please forgive me, and,   thank you. These are the four words that you're gonna say to yourself, but I did a lot of,   breath work like,   this   is too early for me.   Like, Wim Hof breathing, I was doing workouts   regular basis.   I went then, when I was hungry after workout, I went to,   the forest to get some clean,   fresh air into my cells. So I didn't was that hungry either.   I was fit, all that stuff, but that was only possible with the mindset.   So how do you, Cheryl, keep your mindset, and what help for you   to get through these periods of   yeah, these periods of time.  



[01:13:14] Unknown:

Yeah. And so these pictures that I put together are gonna just show you that because it's it's a twenty four seven thing. If you are gonna have a mindset, you don't just have it for a minute or for a little while or for a couple of days. It's a mindset.   And so Right. If if and some things,   are harder or have a whole lot more value or both,   and you have to contend.   You have to contend.   We can't take these lying down. Okay? So that means that I have to stand in it. Well, I had learned   this is key.   I know about my authority, but I really didn't understand that I could just speak it and it's just so.   I thought that Right. We would have to do. Well, when I when I they when they were having the,   federal mandate for the vaccines for, federal employees and especially that pissed me off for our military.  

But,   when they had that that federal mandate, I was watching a video   and the I can I can see her face, but I just cannot remember her name? When I don't wanna think something, I really I just can't even remember the   Well, she,   was they they were showing her talking about the federal mandate   and how when she sent out the memorandum and I stopped, I went, hold up. Wait a second.   It's a freaking memo?   They're talking about it's some it's a law and it's a memo?   The the obfuscation,   this is deception. So I kept listening, and then she put up a visual aid that was the memo. So I paused it again, and I drew the whole square that because that's I'm a note taker. I wanted to have exactly what that thing looked like. When I started to write,   I so and so declare that   vaccines   are mandated for.  

I so and so declare that, and I I went,   they're using your declare and decree a thing.   They're using your declare and decree a thing. I said, oh, no. They don't. No. They don't. I declare that will fall on dead soil. And did you hear my voice change?   Oh, yeah. It it comes out like that. The first time I ever heard that voice,   I was at, the mall with my daughter. And if you think I'm attracted, you think I'm attracted. My daughter is just absolutely beautiful, and she's my niece by   by blood.   But she is my wife. Okay.   Yeah. So,   we were in we we were upstairs in the mall, turned around the you know how in a in a,   a department store like Macy's,   they'll have, like, an aisle that'll go all the way around the store, and then you have all these things you can go in between. We were in the outside aisle, turn, and so I'm telling you the guy was way far.  

And as soon as we turned out of I in my head, I went, that guy's on drugs.   Alright. And then I stepped another, like, five, six feet. And in my head, he's on meth.   Then we're getting close enough to see him,   and I he's looking   at my daughter.   And then he looks over at me, and then he lands on my chest.   And he looks back up at me, and I just looked at him like,   well Fuck. And I pass him, and I've got my I have my daughter like this. I   I I didn't think   these words.  

[01:16:34] Unknown:

Right.   They were spoken.  

[01:16:37] Unknown:

I I her I give him that look, go pass him, and then I go, I'll beat you down, boy.   I was like, what? And my daughter looked up at me, and I hear him go, what'd you say? And I turned around and said, you heard what I said. Not okay. Not okay. Not okay. I turned around. I grabbed my daughter. We walk out, and we we got out. She goes, mom, I felt so protect and I I've   protected her before.   She never said these words. She goes, mom, I that felt so good. I felt so protected. My authority just rose up, dude. It just rose up. So Is it isn't it like you your your real  

[01:17:15] Unknown:

being is showing up for you to   don't fuck around.   I'm gonna stay on my man. So that Yes. That that's that's one of the things that I wanna touch base on with you, Cheryl, because   everyone has that that that that power in them, that dot like power.   Yeah. But to find it, it only talks to you when you are afraid, when you are in fear, when you're in survival mode. Then it speaks to you. Oh, oh, when you do just like be has sometimes some substances, and then it talks to you.   It does. But I think it it is in every one of us, and we have to listen to that voice.   And it's not easy at all because sometimes you just you just think that's one of your thoughts.  

Although it's,   for for me, when I hear the voice, I know that's,   a daddy like person that, I can't discuss anything. I can't disagree with it.   Let me see.   Sook. But but that is is   when I see and when I hear you about these stories, that that is what has been build up as that's Cheryl.  

[01:18:28] Unknown:

Yes. Yes.  

[01:18:29] Unknown:

But that that has to do with some,   tremendous   strength   that you have to   show to you and your family and friends and your surroundings. Like, I'm still here, motherfuckers.   Yeah. And I can I can kick everyone's ass if I if I want  

[01:18:49] Unknown:

to? But But but realize that when I when I said I'll beat you down, boy, oh, I was ready if that's what I had to do, but my you down. My authority spoke so boldly that that boy wasn't gonna step to me. He he wasn't the step to me. Because like I told you guys before, there was a time when,   someone raised up to me and I said,   I don't wanna defame anybody. So I I,   I looked at him and said,   you better think about what you're doing before you do it   because you will win,   but you will hurt   when it's all   k.   So Right. There there is a you have to know yourself. You have to know your creator, and you have to know your authority. We have   we have, physical authority. We have legal authority.  

We have spiritual authority, which supersedes everything.   It's so he sees everything.   So that that is it's that knowing again,   the mind frame you find yourself in is going to dictate your mindset   Right.   Unless   you change it. Unless you change it. And so mine had changed to a point, and I had been through so much   that I was ready to face this kind of a of a battle. What were you gonna say?  

[01:20:12] Unknown:

So I think that these kinds of   yes. I'm I'll just speak out loud what I think. Right? I think that these kinds of events in our lives,   have a reason.   Even if if if that's not that pretty.   It's not like, okay. I'm gonna show you this, so you're gonna get that. No. It's it's like, okay.   For me,   three times   that I saw myself floating,   so so my soul was floating up, and I saw myself laying there.   With every single breath that I took was like, maybe it's gonna be the last one that I'm gonna breathe out.   That,   that changed so much in my system that even now that I just can't take some stupid shit anymore.   Yeah. Even if so so,   it changed me   dramatically   when it comes to, okay, I'm gonna say no.  

And in the early days, I was speaking about no, about things that weren't that okay in my life, whatever, but it didn't change them.   So when I got out of my or when I was in the process   of getting healthy again,   and something like, okay, get shit done. That's the first thing you gotta do because   you gotta change your mindset because what happened right now   does not mean it's been fruitful for the future because she can't end up like that, just like that. It's nothing. It's nothing.   So   with that new mindset,   a lot of things start to happen, and I'm still working a lot of things out, especially when I'm looking at my course, like, get shit done. Oh, wow. I know it's a beautiful course, but I still have to do and to think about it and to practice it every single day. Because it does something like, oh, here it is for you, and now   you're gonna change life. No, fucker.  

Every single day we wake up, you have some choices to make and some consequences to deal with.   And,   when you have shit done like this, all of a sudden, I think you   can agree with me, all of a sudden, all these little distractions do not mean any shit to me anymore.   Just like blah blah blah.   In the early days, everything was like, I have to adapt to it. I have to say something about it. I have to whatever the fuck. I I gotta start So  

[01:22:44] Unknown:

scream. That's the rant. Right? It's it's it's knee jerk knee jerk knee jerk knee jerk. It's all programming. I'm finding myself even if it's something like I'm gonna have a second cup of coffee, I've talked wait wait a minute.   I think that's programming. I really don't want a cup of coffee, but I'm restless.   So I'm noticing when I go to do something, I'll go, oh, no. That's programming, so I won't do it.   Right. I don't realize because it's programmed, and it come it comes so naturally that we're knee jerking all over the place.  

[01:23:11] Unknown:

Yes. But it's the same thing if you go through some shit and you say to people like, okay.   Oh, you want a beer? No. No. Thanks. Can I have a Coke? Oh, come on. Don't be silly. Drink one beer. Are you we are your friends, blah blah blah. Why do I have   to give you an explanation   or,   a responsibility   for not to drink a fucking beer?  

[01:23:38] Unknown:

It's to make them more kind. It's to make them more comfortable, not you. They don't slack. But if you say  

[01:23:45] Unknown:

if you say, like, oh, I'm on on on on a, a medics   and, a medical shit. And when I'm gonna drink beer, I'm gonna   I don't know. Oh, don't don't   that's not a problem. So there's a lot of things   that I figured out when I was hovering above my own body   and getting the the mindset done and and knowing to change life for it changes you, all that shit. When I was in that kind of spot, I knew, like,   I'm not the one who you're gonna fuck around with anymore,   especially not myself.   If I'm gonna make a fucking promise, I gotta keep it to myself.   I'm too lazy.  

I was too lazy. I didn't take any accountability,   no credibility to myself.   For everyone, I let everything loose. I would do the stuff that I have to do with love and all that shit. But I figured out, like, where's my love?   Where is my no go zone? Where is my fuck you do it yourself zone? Where is my dignity for myself   to be like I want to be?   That's still hard work.  

[01:24:52] Unknown:

It is.   And but that's it. It's hard work. But you said you have to practice every day, and the word I use is contend.   If say say you're a a boxing match, you just gonna fight for the first match and you're gonna let you know, you let your guard up? No. You're gonna contend every single round, every single round.   And so in that contending,   one thing that's really important for people to understand is over 90%   of your decisions   come out of your   nonconscious   mind.   That's that's that's like you have a nonconscious,   a conscious, and, a subconscious and your conscious in terms of what you're aware of. So there's and you think about that. You know, I'm 60 or you said 50  

[01:25:32] Unknown:

how? 62.  

[01:25:33] Unknown:

50 two. 50 two winners. Yeah. Okay. So you have fifty two plus years worth of memories in this noggin.   So you wouldn't be able to even do the automatic thing that go like that   if you were contending with all that information. You've been   Right. Everything would be like that. So it has to be held back   so that you can actually focus and and and,   process what's going on.  

[01:26:00] Unknown:

K? So I it's like it's like a reboot. It's like a recharge of your for defragmentation   of your,   of your system.   And then once you have that done, you get rid of all the stuff that you don't need to junk followers.   Funny because I call myself sometimes, you know, rock and roll junkie, but junk folder, you gotta get rid of it. But then, even if you did that, if you have a clean computer,   everyone starts out like, oh, now I'm gonna map it like I should this is the screenshots.   These are the   images. This is   whatever music, porn, whatever the fuck you wanna put on your you know, you're gonna start out again. But   if you have a reset like this,   no matter what you if it's breast cancer,   colon cancer,   whatever,   surgery, something is not good in your body,   you have to get to the point,   what is really fucking important?  

I am.  

[01:26:55] Unknown:

How do I gonna get through life? Because it's nice that dogs help you. It's nice when family shows you up. It's nice when friends are showing up, but you got to do this fucking shit all by yourself. Because if you do it, it's not gonna be lasting. It won't be lasting if you do if everybody else does it, there's there's they're you're not building any foundation. There's nothing to build upon. So So it is that contending every day. I'm gonna try and go through these pictures a little faster   than I was because,   not that I would have, but if I was  

[01:27:25] Unknown:

Actually, I'm just trying always.  

[01:27:27] Unknown:

I know. Okay. So what I'm gonna do is I'm gonna go through and show you what I look at every day. So here in my bathroom, it says, I will give thanks with all my heart.   What did I say when I sang that? What did you think was gonna come out of all this?   Gratitude is the essence. Boomerang. Alright. Boomerang. K. And I'll show you something with a boomerang in a second. Okay.   And here, I had another customer, a customer client,   that gave me cancer, been there, beat that, this fighter thing. So I've got the fire thing like that. I've got that right there. This is where I do my breath work. And the girly and the girly car colors, all pink.   Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. And so and I do my I've just redid all this. I do my breath work there.  

Okay. Now this right here, that's my son's,   my son's girlfriend gave me that for my birthday, and I was packing a wound at that time. We went out to a restaurant. And and so   I call her Bernie because my mom's name was Bernice.   And my mom likes birds, and her favorite color was yellow. So she lives there. When I don't wear it so this is my bathroom. I got my earrings hanging here. This is a card   a client gave me. Here's a flower somebody gave me. Okay. Well, let's oh oh, now I'm looking at this.   My daughter gave this to me, and on the back, I'm gonna show it to you. Let me grab it really fast.   Oh, it says I love you, but on the back, it says  

[01:28:50] Unknown:

Oh, wait. I don't I don't hear you.   You gotta talk to the,   you got it.   Love and stay strong. Love you and stay strong. Wow.  

[01:29:01] Unknown:

So that is that. My my daughter gave that to me because of the cancer diagnosis. You got it.   I love you.   Stay strong.   K? Right.   And that right there, she gave me that, mom. This is part of,   me being a chauffeur. Here's another heart rock. Here's my daddy's home the Home Depot pencil because he passed in, my mom passed in November of nineteen, and then he passed in December of twenty twenty.   And this is my first Father's Day thing I ever gave him because we he reconciled with our family later on when I was, I was in my thirties, and and that was the first Father's Day gift I ever gave him.   Wow. And then let me go back here. We're gonna do this fast.  

Okay.   So and if I'm in my kitchen okay. Here we go. Here we go. Come on. You can you do it.   You see, I oh, wait. Let me let me let me let me get this bigger.   For the   in that from their website.  

[01:30:06] Unknown:

Right.  

[01:30:07] Unknown:

Happy events will take place in your home. K. And those are little hearts you can't tell. See? This is over here. I got my son's that was a Right. I did this for his his birthday party. I did a Minecraft party when he was in elementary school, so I still have one of the that's just made out of paper folded with Scotch tape. Right. You know? Cool. And,   and I love this guy. Wait. Wait. I gotta show him to you. Sorry.   I could do this. I really can. It just takes a minute.   There he is. Oh, with the sniper rifle and all Lego Lego? No. It's it's a Yeah. The it's a Lego, but that's that was off of a a different thing. It's actually made out of metal and painted and everything.   That's big. Yo. Yeah.  

And I heart rocks everywhere, so this is on my kitchen table. Wow. That's my kitchen table. Here's my daughter.   Up here, simply grateful. I am surround myself   all the time, dude. Okay? This is I did this one. My daughter did all these three. My son did that one. My daughter did that.   I am Right. Love everywhere.   Now this is   Uh-huh. Read this real quick. Hold on. Wait a minute.   Hold on.   I'm not get here we go.  

[01:31:25] Unknown:

There it is. Even to your old age,  

[01:31:29] Unknown:

I I am I am he. I am he. He he. I   can. Let let me read it. Let me read it. It says even to your old age   yeah. Sorry. Even to your old age, I am he.   And even to gray hairs, I will carry you.   I have made and I will bear,   even I will carry and will deliver you. Look at this. April.   I told you I saw my birth year and saw it mirrored, so this went on my refrigerator   because this is my promise.   Right. The key.   It's a promise.   Okay.   I create worlds in my house. I'm gonna go through these really fast. Right. Yeah. I create little worlds in my house. K? My daughter fairies and color breeze.   You know, little little,   thing we did for my son. That's that's masking tape to make a head thing.  

Uh-huh. This my daughter made both of these for me. This is her. That's me.  

[01:32:39] Unknown:

So I think that I'm correct. What I'm saying, if you   if you are,   willing to   find your inner love, you can surround yourself with positive energy like the hearts, with the rocks, with all the good notes and all that stuff, that will change life instantly. Aren't you agreeing?  

[01:32:59] Unknown:

Yes. And it's again, I am reminded of this everywhere I go. It's in every room of my house, and I literally started   decorating with a different flare.   This, I did in honor of my mom when she passed.   Let me see. Let me pull this pull this one up.   Because she got this for me at a, thrift store because it reminded me of her. If I could do this Uh-huh.   For $5, she got that for me.   And and so then here, I've got all my rocks and, you know, praying for her, my kids.   Even that's not how I would have done that, but this this is part of me. This is part of me.   That's how I   this is how I've parented my kids.  



[01:33:48] Unknown:

I'm fearful. Is that your daughter and your son?  

[01:33:51] Unknown:

Yes.   So I've got sure. I've got to raise them since they were infants.   I was told at 19 I couldn't have kids, and so my sister and I have raised them since they were babies.  

[01:34:04] Unknown:

Wow.  

[01:34:05] Unknown:

Yeah. So James and Destiny.   And,   see, even this, I got little wish pillows. I got a bunya. Yeah. Yeah. Dude, everything and this, see, this is all about vision that god has given me. I've been in this reward too. There were wolves trying to get me from from behind, but but now I can see that that that,   I don't even have to fear wolves. Okay? They're beautiful.   And   it's important too what I want people to know, it's important for people to here's the some people see weeds, some see weeds, others see wishes.   K? If you Right. If you're having a hard time, I just made start making a beaded lampshade. I'd never done it before. Just just pick up and do something new.  

Eric, get Do some crying. Yeah. And then if you look at this in terms of making something that's a wish or beautiful, yeah, my mom passed away in November. My dad passed away in December. But guess what? We made a winter wonderland, and we and James shared her birthday the same day, so I did something really special for him there. And then my dad, we had a rebel party, you know, right before   because he was that's my daddy. You know? And so Right. That so when I remember that time, I don't remember see how that gets really low billing passing? It says Uh-huh.   Daddy, rebel party, Thanksgiving, winter wonderland, sanctuary. And look at this. It says, I don't know exactly what I've called myself to and why.  

And God said to me, it's because you trust me so much.   And this is what I learned at the beginning of COVID. They were trying to see who will submit and how fast,   but I remembered that it was the Passover.   And so I declared at the very beginning I would never get COVID and the angel of death would pass over my household. I was in private shelter   getting all kinds of,   power and and   fire,   and there's all these embers. And as soon as the holy spirit   comes in with a backdraft, it's gonna ignite. That's where I'm at right now.   Right. Right. That's where I'm at right now.  

So you have to remind yourself of what you know. I have writings. I'll go I'll I'll show you this more closely, but this is just some of the things I do. K? And this right here, I'd never drawn anything before but doodled, and I said I I needed escape. And so I said, how do you draw a profile?   This is important. Oh.   This is really important.   So I threw I I I looked on YouTube, and I said, how do you draw a profile? And I said, oh, do these ovals do these ovals. So I, at first, just had just the profile that was so good that I said, I don't wanna touch it.   Stop that. Mhmm.  

And but I said, well, that was the whole purpose I did it was to escape this madness that I'm finding out. So we're we're gonna do this, Cheryl. So I started right here in the beginning, in the middle. I just put a heart,   then I hit a so I was doing a mandala.   Doing a mandala. Uh-huh. Doing a mandala. And if you look at it, it looks like an eye.   And then Right. Get this stuff around and all of a sudden I I started shooting water out of it. Shooting water out. All these little things are like, shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot. And they're not tears. They're not tears, but they look like it's living water. It's living water. And this right here is my crown chakra and my authority. I didn't know what I was drawing. I had no idea what I was drawing. Right. Okay. So this right here,   somebody asked me I'm doing it the wrong way. Somebody asked me, why is your heart outside of yourself? Well, it's not. It's right there.  



[01:37:35] Unknown:

Right.  

[01:37:36] Unknown:

And this is see all these swirling? This is me going into a diamond. It's it's me.   And I I was gonna do an earring, but I ended up doing this feather. Well, I found out yesterday why, and I'll explain this to you at another time because I don't have time.   Now Mhmm. This right here,   I I I remember when I drew it, and I'm like, what is and and I just dot dot dot and and left it like that.   And I didn't understand what it was. Well, let me show you what it is.   This book I got   just the week before. Just the week before.   I found because the the reason I had that that that, drawing is I'm getting all my stuff together to market because I got licensed in 2020,   got diagnosed. I've never got to market. My client load is down to whoo.  

So I'm bringing everything out. I'm gonna work with somebody to get a website,   and all the things I'm finding were messages that me and God were gonna give to me and my older self.  

[01:38:32] Unknown:

Right.  

[01:38:34] Unknown:

All this. And so this has to do with the vestibular. I I I all the stuff that Ben was was was,   or what I I have learned from from Bill Ben's I can't even talk. Ben Bill   okay.   Now   the reinforcement troops from the inside,   that is breath work. That is resetting my parasympathetic nervous system. That's where Sharon and Ben come in. And we can get to important. This is for my counseling.   Your mindset,   you can have this   hold on.   It won't   can you read it says detached,   broken, careless.   That's what your mind's so to dead tree tree trees.   But if you do full care   and we're not even right there.  

Oh, revelation and understanding and discernment.   Because you go down into deep waters and the deep roots, that nonconscious 90% of your decisions comes out of your nonconscious mind. Well, I needed to know what was in there. And so that's why I'm practically very present, and and I know myself. I know my creator. I know. I know. I know.   And so that's why this did not phase me like it would people. This is me just doing stuff for, you know, brand I'm try I'm gonna learn the soul. This is gonna be on my website. I was just doodling all my bio, forms, virtual office,   the FAQs,   and soul care. God. What I didn't realize   is   wait. Oh, wait. No. I want you to see this too.  

This is how my brain works. So deception and distraction to divide and conquer.   You're driven by fear. They're   trauma and control by trauma and control.   Your, deception in the rat race for the survival minds with the survival mindset.   Watch the clock, not enough time. Jockey for position,   scarcity mentality.   Comparison trap, I'm not enough.   Well, I wrote another little story about the the   the lion the king who wanted to be a jungle.   So all this is what I'm doing. You keep and now this   this.   This was written   on December   7.  

Come on now. Doing it again. 12/07/2021.   When   the enemy of my soul was telling me that it was God's fault or my fault for the cancer well, it's God's fault. That's what he's saying. Not my fault. He was saying God's fault. And I just told him, hey.   God is absolutely good. There's no shade or shadow   in him. Uh-huh. Who that has a shade of shadow, the only person people that are responsible for this cancer are looking each other in the eyes, and you can't talk to me because I have authority over you. So you can just shut up. You can just shut up.   Right. And don't tell me what my god is. You you you watch. You watch him   teach you how to use boomerangs.  

You watch him teach you how to use boomerangs. So these I found on the there these things are   they are weighted   just like a boomerang. Why that's why I kept them because God showed me about a boomerang.   So I started Monday just sitting down,   you know, just dueling stuff down. Watchmen, watchful, seat of authority, throne room of grace, holy of holies,   fire in your hands, fire in your mouth, fire in your belly,   emerging waterfall, geyser of living water. That's me. That water that was coming out, I'm a geyser of living water.   I have a sphere of influence, and my plumb line is truth   and authority   in.  

All the land. I'm taking back all the land. Even this,   I'm taking back all the land that was mine. You can't have it. Right. The tree   the the, tree and man, the river banks and the willow tree. Sometime you and I are gonna talk because I could tell you stories, every one of these. K. Now we're gonna skip this for a minute. Okay. So this says, what does it mean what does it look like to pray without ceasing? And this is what he told me, divided   no longer. And how do you do that with your mindfulness, your mindset, with mind over matter? So your thoughts and belief have to be over the internal,   which are Mhmm. Feelings and emotions   that go into behaviors   that you act out in your relationships.  

And you have to have mind over matter for the external,   for your mindsets   and your intentions because they turn into substance, and then they are acted out in systems and allegiances.   So you better know you, and you better know who you're following because that's what's gonna create in your life. That's what you're going to have.   So this this right here is gonna be a book. The kiln or the crucible. You choose.   A kiln bakes Right. Everything in Right. Like those fairies I showed you. My my daughter painted on there and put it in the oven. It bakes everything in there. And and you're the only way you're gonna get that off now is to mar you you you gotta crack it down and bleach it or you're gonna scrape it off. You're gonna mar the features. Okay? So you can go in a kiln if you want and bake all that crap in. I, for one, am gonna choose to go into the crucible.   Because in the crucible,   put all the metal in there. And when when you heat it up so high, all the toxins come out. You you just slim skim that off as dross, and all you're left with is solid gold, and that's me. K?  

Right.   Solid gold. K. And how do you do that?   How you   intense revelation? That is me spending time with my creator   and myself. Mhmm. Intense revelation   creates intense transformation.   I didn't know what I was doing here.   This was before see, because God told me in '21, I looked at my sister, I go,   God just told me I'm gonna redeem the ways of him, and he showed me vibrations and chakras.   She goes, what? I go, I know.   I know.   Well, that's what this is.   And here's the you're getting up into the transformation to the crown chakra.   See down here Right. Much going on, is there? Ain't much going on. Well, to get intense transformation, you gotta start getting intense revelation   so so you know what you know what you know. Okay. So what I also wrote down here I didn't know what I was writing, dude.  

I wrote hold on. Let me one here. There we go. Okay.   Inhale and exhale gratitude to become   overwhelmed with gratitude. This right here.   That is my breath work.   I just started doing breath work,   and this thing, the reflection   body image filled and imbued.   Oops. Yeah. Watch this.   What just happened?   Yeah. Hope dealer wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Yeah. Yeah. I'm gonna do that last. Hope dealer.   Is this it? I don't know if this is it or not.   Wait. Let me go back. Shoot.   Remind yourself of what you know. Let me see that last picture.   I was looking at   this.  

Oh, don't you tell me it's not there.   Oh, it's my higher self. I know where it's at.   Okay.   Right here.   Okay. So we're gonna start here first. I don't wanna  

[01:45:39] Unknown:

I don't know. Well Yeah. Then we're gonna ask you, 14 questions.   Okay. I'm ready. Or you wanna touch base on some other things that are,   and we can do, of course, part two soon. Sure. Sure. We could do that. Get into more stuff because there's a lot of things you discover,   and and to talk about, especially about   how,   how you can chase yourself.   Right?  

[01:46:04] Unknown:

Right. Right. And then and and when we do a part two, we can also go into some of the details that I don't have time to go into, like what this is. So this right here, one of my clients, we we were in a session.   I I work online with clients, so I this is my office.   And,   she was showing me one of her sketches, and I go, oh, is that is that the Virgo? Is that Virgo? And she goes, no. It's and I can't remember what she told me. Well, the next day, she,   she said, I'm sending you something.   I got this in the mail.   When I when when she sat down   or when I asked her if it was Virgo, she said this popped in her mind.  

And she because I'm Virgo.   And so she she did this, and I think I've got it.   Oh,   wait. Do I?   That's okay.   It's okay.   I'll do this.   So you but you can't see it. Let me see here. I'm sorry. Let me let me see if it's there. There it is. I knew I had it. Okay. Oh, look at that. Abundance. That's all it shows. Abundance. Look at that. Right. K. This is where I sit this is my seat of authority. I'm sitting on it right now. This chair right now. Right. Authority, but that's me in heaven. That's me in heaven.   And this vine, that's Christ.   I'm part of his tribe.  

I will I and this is all about chakras.   K. Royalty and yep. Right. This is that's she had no idea.   She goes, I Right. I I just drew what I saw in my mind, and so I was able to explain every single thing in here but this.   That's my sign, but it's holding a world. Well, now I know what it is. It's I'm creating my world. That's what that is.   K? So so   they sent me this. This is another client sent me this   or made this to me when I had office. She brought this to me. It's made out of recycled material, recycled wood. She embroidered upon it.   And it says the kiss of the sun is for pardon. The song of the bird is for mirth. We are closer to God's heart in the garden   than anywhere else on Earth. And when I did my our meditation breath work on Sunday,   we all did this whole garden thing, and I just could not believe it just everything is tying together is what I'm trying to say here. So this is just again, in my sanctuary, I have like, I made this, dude, I made this in rehab.  

And I said one day, this is gonna be in my office.   Right. I did that in 9094.  

[01:48:32] Unknown:

Wow.   Wow.  

[01:48:34] Unknown:

Okay. And so,   again,   this   This part of the one I'm  

[01:48:43] Unknown:

Mhmm.  

[01:48:44] Unknown:

This one and the one I just showed you, that is me in the spirit.   This is me communing with God.  

[01:48:52] Unknown:

Right.  

[01:48:54] Unknown:

Me and God, and we create   our my my I choose what's in my mindset.   And I have 40,   and I will create I am a diamond.   There   there is no other if there's no if, ands, or buts about it. And guess what? Right. I'm royalty, but I'm no better than you. And you're no better than me, and neither is the pope, the president. I don't care who you are. You're you're not gonna one up. It's not, it's not happening. I'm not gonna do that to a whole person. I'm the emperor of the kingdom.  

[01:49:25] Unknown:

The Emperor of the kingdom.  

[01:49:27] Unknown:

So what I wanted   I decided one last thing. One last thing.   So here, on February 2, we have our hour breath work,   and I had, there was a vision I had years before that. And the vision, I'm gonna explain it to you. So it is if I am sitting,   in camp.   It's dark.   Big fire. Huge fire. So big, I'm fifteen, sixteen feet away.  

[01:49:52] Unknown:

Mhmm.  

[01:49:53] Unknown:

And I'm like this,   and that's Christ.   And we're just hanging out. We're just watching the fire. We're just watching the fire.   And since our focus was on the fire, where the light and the shadow was being cast,   it was my periphery. Well, I saw movement. So I I'm like this, and I look over,   and I see a lion walk in.   And I can see the paws,   the the color of my little lap desk here. I saw the paws.   I saw   it coming in close in. K? So,   I'm hanging out with Jesus.   I like to call him Christ. I'm hanging out with Christ, and he's coming the the lion comes in,   and he's about five six feet away from the fire on the left of it, and he lays down there because fire was big.  

And so I say to Christ without my mouth moving, because that's how we talk.   I say, I sure would love to go snuggle with that lion.   And then   Christ says without his mouth moving, I know you would, but you're content right where you're at. And he was so wiped that I didn't even have another thought to say to him with my mouth closed. I was just like, yeah. You're I'm I'm here. Right? And so that that was the vision. That was the vision. Okay.   On February 2,   that vision popped in my head during breath work.   And   instead of the fire being the focus and the and and the shade and shadow, light light and shadow being the periphery, it was opposite. That was the periphery. Now this is my focus.  

I don't realize, though, that I'm not at this vantage point until   instead of the lion, Christ walks in.   And I realized, wait a minute. I'm I'm looking this way. I'm not oh, wait. He's coming in.   And as soon as I thought that,   it   it reset again.   And then in comes   Christ and the lion. And when they walked in,   the fire start kicking up, so I changed my focus to the fire. And it started creating this force up above the fire,   like a vortex,   and it's and I could see the little embers, like, turn yellow and disappear up and disappear up.   And so that then the force of the fire swung back around the backs of Christ and the lion,   and and then the fire kicked up again. And this time I look, and that force thing that was above it is big. And in the middle of it is, like, a computer generated   lion's head that's full of flames.  

Uh-huh. Dropping the it it or the the lion's head in flames was and then it really kicked up. It swirled back around, and now it goes behind   Christ and the lion, then it comes back behind me 16 feet away. It's swirling around,   and it resets.   And who's walking in   with Christ and the lion? This girl. I'm walking in the middle with them, and I am not exaggerating   at all.   When we walked in together, all three of us that's key. All three of us are walking in together. My breath coach says,   you have now become your own healer.   You are the who you are the who you've been waiting for.  

And then God put us a thought in my head and said, you are prepared for this moment.   You are powder coated.   Nice. And and remember, it said, what does it look like to pray without ceasing? Divided no longer. Just like the bacon in the kiln, you try getting that power off off that gun. He says, oh, no. Honey, honey, it's not just the gun. You're my silver bullet. It's powder coated too.   Right. Okay. Right. So that's what he that's what happened in my breath. Okay. February 2,   breath work. February   third, my sister who knows nothing about it sends me this freaking picture.   Oh, you gotta be kidding me. And look at this. With February walking with the Yes. And look at here. February 3, February fourth. It's very clear when this came in because I processed after with the group. So the group all heard my my testimony.  

They heard my vision.   And then my sister sends this to me. K?   Justice. Justice. Powder coated.   Divided no more. I don't have to worry about a thing, dude.   Anybody wants to step up on me? They they had better think.   They had better think.   Right. And so here we go.   Look. Well, I got a fish. Frequency of love, it's coming from the frequency of love channel.   Remember I told you my birth year and seeing it mirrored? What is the healing power of the universe? The frequency is 464.   We're not done. Oh, shit. We're not done.   Now what does this say? Great representation   of our beloved.  

Cheryl means beloved. That's why I said   beloved is blessed.   So this is telling me that the lion and Christ is a great representation   of Cheryl.   Now I'm gonna drop the f bomb, and, pastor, if you ever hear this, I'm sorry.   But   if this is a great representation of Cheryl, then everybody better look the fuck out.   Right.   K.   This this was sent to me the day after I saw it. I sent it to my breath coach, and she's like, what? That's what I saw when you were describing it. And then I told my sister about a week later about everything, ten days actually. And she said   hold on. Hold on. Hold on. She   said, Cheryl, when I was watching when I saw that, I I just I said Cheryl has to see that. Cheryl has to see that. I didn't send it to anybody else. I just sent it to you.  

Holy shit. So ask me again about my mindset.  

[01:55:42] Unknown:

Wow.  

[01:55:43] Unknown:

That's why you see a lawyer in front of you. That's why I was able to withstand   that battle was for my life.   The enemy was trying to take this girl out because   you see this passion. This is what I this is how I work with individuals.   We don't mess around. People go, how do you lose people's problems all day? I don't. We mine for gold, and we have a heck of a adventure doing it.   Right. You see this this this is hasn't been about Cantor. It's been about my mindset   and my creator   and how   it was for a reason from the enemy's side.   God told me   that the enemy   has a warehouse full of boomerangs, and he doesn't know how they work.  



[01:56:30] Unknown:

Uh-huh.  

[01:56:31] Unknown:

So he's he's getting whoop ass right now. He's getting whoop ass because you can't violate will and not have the karma.  

[01:56:39] Unknown:

Right.  

[01:56:40] Unknown:

It is. It is. It is. And we have to know it and know it and know it and stand and contend because we don't have to have swords and all that out there. We just have to say,   you can't are. My will. You cannot. That's it. I don't sharing. So if you do it   there there's a guy that said, if I sell poison apples and on the the my sign says,   three apples for a dollar and you come in and you buy my apples and you die, that's on me. But if I say three poison apples for a dollar like you do on the back of products, right, and you come in and you buy those apples,   I'm free. No. Sorry. You no. No. No. Because you didn't put three poison apples.  

You put Right. You put apple three apples free of something, but you see, that's a lie by obfuscation. You just you you you did a little prestidigitation.   You know, switch your little folks there. Right. Right.   And as you can see, I could just talk and talk and talk. So I'll be quiet because you have 14 questions to ask me.  

[01:57:40] Unknown:

It's nice. That great, though. Right?   Yes. Well, we gotta do a part two. That that's for sure. And, I   just wanted you   nobody I interrupt a little bit more, but I want you to get that story out because I think a lot of people, especially women, of course,   will have some   some support and love about your story that you told.   My sister, she, she has to go through a scam within now and a few months.   She defeated breast cancer, but it's not a pretty thing.   And, it's it's not only like, oh, you got cancer, but you got one of the cancers that turns your image that you have of a woman.   And everyone that sees   a woman has a picture out of it, you know.  

And fucking around with your mind because you wake up as an as an other person.   You have to accept it and deal with it. There's no other way to do that. And that's a that's a fucking hard thing to do.   So,   even that when when people say, oh, everything's gonna be okay. When I went back to my   work,   my boss said, oh, what are you worried about? They took it out. Right? So I said,   have you checked what I got?   Because it's 25 percent that I do not wake up. And I got it only three times, motherfucker.   So that's the other thing. A lot of people do not know what kind of struggle that we have in every single day to   look at ourselves,   embrace it who we are,   and even be sometimes critical   to ourselves, like, oh, fuck. I screwed up there or or whatever. Yeah. But that's a very strengthy   that's a very strengthy thing to do because a lot of people are just like, okay. You know? Okay.  

Cheryl, I have 14 I think it's 14 questions. You know them all. For sure. You know them all.   I have to see what's happening right now because   this tablet is giving me sometimes a little bit   pain in the ass to work with it,   like now.  

[01:59:55] Unknown:

The way you really want it to work.  

[01:59:57] Unknown:

It's always.   It's it's un   I'm I'm gonna ask you just like, oh, now it's popping up. What?   This is crazy.  

[02:00:09] Unknown:

You are about to give up, Paul.  

[02:00:11] Unknown:

No. I never ever give up. That that's not me. I know.   Here it is. Okay.   So we did this. We did that. Okay. What's your favorite color, Cheryl?   Blue.   Blue. Okay. What's your favorite music?  

[02:00:29] Unknown:

Pastor, if you're if you're watching this again.   Okay.   Heavy metal,   and   I kinda like some Viking music.  

[02:00:45] Unknown:

Okay.   K. So so, like, a high low and white knot and all that stuff you like. Good. Yeah. Well, you know, yeah, some of those hard rock bands. We'll just leave it at that because  

[02:00:56] Unknown:

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. People listening to one of the songs and  

[02:01:01] Unknown:

Okay. Well, everybody   needs to,   when you get self love, you've gotta embrace your bright side, close to your dark side.   A lot of people,   do not want to get into that because, you know, it's already bright side. Oh, fuck you. There's a dark side too. But you have to embrace   that. That is all.   Yeah. Yes. Well, the shadow work is necessary to know what your deepest,   fear and and deepest darkness is, but you have to embrace it because it can help you in some situations.   Don't cut it out completely because it's part of you. It's part of day and night. It's part of black and white and all the things that you know?   So what's your favorite movie or series?  

Oh, your pastor is not gonna be happy. I see that on your reaction line. No. No. He did Braveheart. Braveheart's my favorite movie.  

[02:01:54] Unknown:

But my favorite   series is is survivor.   I won't worry about Scholaster there. I just a lot of people you know, I've watched every season. I've watched every season. Okay.  

[02:02:05] Unknown:

How much how many seasons is that?  

[02:02:08] Unknown:

Well, I think it's forty two or forty three. I haven't watched the last two seasons. The fortieth   season was, like, I cried. That's, like Oh, fucking forty seasons?   It's, like, 43 now. 43 or 44. Because they do two seasons. Like a lifetime  

[02:02:23] Unknown:

watching TV. Wow.  

[02:02:25] Unknown:

Well, it's it's easier.  

[02:02:27] Unknown:

But it needs Yeah.   Yeah.   What's your favorite book?  

[02:02:33] Unknown:

It is the Bible.  

[02:02:35] Unknown:

It is the Bible. What's your favorite drink or or or beverage?  

[02:02:41] Unknown:

It needs to change   coffee.   Okay. That's the one thing what I still do. That's the one thing. I'm well, it's the sugar and the powdered creamer that need to go. Not so much the coffee. I got yeah.   Coffee.  

[02:02:56] Unknown:

So   little back backstory for me. So I've been now in America.   I arrived at the February   9,   and yesterday   was the first day that I   took a coffee from   Starbucks.   Oh.   Because I never encountered   any Starbucks while I was here in the middle of nowhere,   which is good. But I I told yesterday to Sue, like, she's taking so much good care of me. I'm gonna gain some weight. It's also the elevation because I'm, like, 5,000   feet higher than,   in The Netherlands. So I'm a little bit more feeling like I'm bloated a little bit. But the thing is, I'm not used to all the sugar and all the, the butter and all that stuff. And and and so I I told her, like, that the first few days I really had a bad time, you know, she was. Yeah. Adjusting.   Yeah. To adjusting and to balance it a little bit. So,   yeah, they they're taking so good care of me.  

Lovely people.   Okay. Back to,   back to you, Cheryl. What's your favorite food?  

[02:04:06] Unknown:

That's a hard one.   It's it's in between,   a good steak   and tacos. Good tacos. They have to be good tacos. They have to be good tacos. They look good.  

[02:04:21] Unknown:

What kind of,   clothing you like to wear the most?  

[02:04:26] Unknown:

I would like to wear 100%   cotton   with all my clothes now. But, no, for socket types of clothes, I I I'm I've got two looks to me. I like the feminine,   and then I also have some black T shirts and jeans and  

[02:04:42] Unknown:

and Right. I like rocking Yeah. Yeah.   So have you ever considered linen? Consider what?   Cotton?  

[02:04:51] Unknown:

What is that?  

[02:04:52] Unknown:

Oh, what's the word in in English?   I'll I'll gotta keep it up.   Hold on one second. Oh, shit. They they did all they did with the gap.   Well, that's something different story. Oh, linen.  

[02:05:09] Unknown:

Oh, linen. Linen.   Linen.   Yes. Linen. I don't know why I said linen. That's stupid. Right? Linen? Because Well, because you look at his eye as a you're looking at the eye as a long eye. Yeah. So linen, I don't have much linen, but I know that linen is even better than cotton.   What? A friend of mine was saying they were gonna   get some linen, and they said that I don't really like the style. I'm like, well, I'm not, you know, I mean, I'm not   too concerned about the style, but I'm sure there's gotta be something I'll like.  

[02:05:38] Unknown:

Well,   as I do, but I'm not gonna tell you that you have to do that. But for me, it works with just like with a belt and my skirts. You know that I wear skirts because I'm a motherfucker.   And it's so comfortable, especially now. The the the the heat is gonna be more and more intense here in in Arizona, of course. It's gonna be in the eighties and nineties, maybe like the hundreds within now in a few strongs.   So   with aligning, it's   it's for me, it's one way to go. And and, of course,   wool. But wool depends on what kind of wool, what kind of,   too many too many variables.  

Yeah. Yeah.   Yeah. Especially yeah. I think it's really comfortable to to wear it as less as much that attached to my body.  

[02:06:28] Unknown:

Yeah. Well, it it breathes too. It breathes.  

[02:06:31] Unknown:

Yeah. Yes. It breathes, and it's it's really good for a lot of things.   Lot of beneficial to it, especially for men that lock up everything that they have.   But that's that's a completely different podcast.  

[02:06:44] Unknown:

Well, but but with the with the linen and all that too, which is another podcast, but that's another thing I learned about frequency. It's the frequency of the material and especially if you you combine certain things together.  

[02:06:54] Unknown:

You know? So Yes. It takes it down or it it charges off. So, what's your favorite holiday destination?  

[02:07:02] Unknown:

My favorite holiday destination?  

[02:07:05] Unknown:

Yeah.  

[02:07:07] Unknown:

My living room with my my family room with my family.  

[02:07:10] Unknown:

Wow.   So now we're gonna get into some, deeper questions.   What's your definition of devil?  

[02:07:22] Unknown:

A selfish   punk ass   who can only   exist,   via   mankind.   And so   he's a liar and a stealer,   and   he does that so he can try to find relevance, but he'll never be relevant.   Because when you're one for the one for the one, all you do is implode. If you're one for the all, that is e it's perpetual   creative   life. So what's the what's the opposite of perpetual creative life? That's that's who the enemy is.  

[02:08:02] Unknown:

So you're saying that basically it's in us.   Right?  

[02:08:07] Unknown:

It you can choose it.  

[02:08:09] Unknown:

You can choose it. Right. So what's your definition of god?   All  

[02:08:19] Unknown:

love,   goodness,   and truth   that   he is,   so loving that he won't violate your will. You get to choose whatever you want.   You get to choose it. And and if he if he did control, then and and didn't let you choose because the people go, why did they let that one person in? But the evil   you either let people choose or not because if I let one person choose and then another one, now I'm not fair, and I just called myself a liar.   Right. Steward's the wise about one thing, then nope. Nope. Then you're a liar. Then you're nothing but a liar.   But   so I consider   God the creator   of all   goodness,   truth, and love because that's what   he, she is. I've been calling God because   my sister taught me father and mother in Swedish, and I know that God has masculine and feminine   qualities, characteristics.  

Otherwise, we wouldn't have male male and female.  

[02:09:23] Unknown:

So Right.   Right.   And you can see it in creation, of course, the all the feminine and masculine   and everything.   There is,  

[02:09:34] Unknown:

only two things, two sides to it. And we need them both, and we need them both.  

[02:09:39] Unknown:

Yes. Yeah.   Yes. So so if if I,   look at the embracement of my own darkness,   it could get me out of some situations really quick because I could be like fierce demon.   Do I want to be? No. Do I choose to be,   to be one? No. But I can   get that feeling and that kind of power within few seconds when somebody fucks me up, then it comes. And then it's not stoppable for for a long time,   which is really good.   And and and then you have to you know, everybody is a little bit like, Jacqueline Hyde somewhere.  

[02:10:19] Unknown:

Yeah. And I I would say in terms of whether for me, I don't I I don't define it as embracing my darkness. I define it as   what that that part of you that's in there, you better refine that and temper that and make sure it does not harm anybody.  

[02:10:35] Unknown:

I   think it went to. I think it went to.   Cheryl, what's your   Go ahead. Sorry. It's okay. What's your interpretation of value?  

[02:10:49] Unknown:

Well, value   is up to the eye of the beholder first. Mhmm.   But I do believe there is true value. And if some people don't see that value,   then I'd have to say they're they're a little mistaken. What I mean by that is love,   family,   you know, goodness, the things I was talking about. The you know?   So Right.   Tell me again that the what what am I telling you? What was the interpretation of value for you? Value. Yeah. So   it is   that thing which makes you wanna wake up every day. It's the thing that motivates you and drives you and keeps you grounded and tempered.   Because guess what? You know, there's certain things that that   I wouldn't do if I didn't have my family. You know? Like like the cancer, I would have done a whole different kind of treatment. But I didn't it wasn't just me I was thinking about. I didn't value just   my life to be saved. I I I also valued   how my especially my my children,   were through that.  

So value to me has a lot of deep meaning   that drives and motivates you to do the right things.  

[02:12:02] Unknown:

And it It doesn't has anything to do with diamonds and and gold. Right? It has to do with much more than that, much more value than that.  

[02:12:11] Unknown:

The similarity would be the investment.   It you you have to invest.   Mhmm. Yeah.  

[02:12:18] Unknown:

So what's your interpretation of success?  

[02:12:24] Unknown:

I would say meeting the mark of why you came, and that's just to express who you are in all of its fullness. Mhmm. And it's there see, there's variation. There's a whole lot we could say there, but if I pinpoint it, then I've I've left somebody else out.  

[02:12:38] Unknown:

Right.   So last two questions, Cheryl. What's your, favorite quote?  

[02:12:43] Unknown:

My favorite what?   Quote.   Oh, quote. I thought you said float.  

[02:12:49] Unknown:

Oh, no. Quote.  

[02:12:51] Unknown:

Okay. It's a it's a scripture. As a man thinketh, so is he.  

[02:12:57] Unknown:

Oh,   that's a nice one. That's a deep one.  

[02:13:02] Unknown:

And it's everything we've been talking about.  

[02:13:05] Unknown:

Right.   So,   maybe this is a good one to to to,   to wrap it up a little bit. What's your life's motto?  

[02:13:14] Unknown:

That's my motto. Yeah.   Well, I I don't didn't have them, but let me think about it because,   love and be loved.   The good one.   I like it because I just beat it up. Love and be loved. I don't know if it anybody else quotes it or if they say it or it's their motto.   But   I think that's the the meaning of all of life   is love.  

[02:13:43] Unknown:

It's all over my house. I I still have to figure out   I still, from my perspective, have to   cut loose with some things   so I can give it the love that it deserves.   And I know that's been,   loved back to me, but I'm I'm sometimes a little bit harsh in recognizing   what the real love is. And it's a process. It's a it's a it's a trauma based   reaction.   It's   there are a lot of things that I can   get. Manchin do to get there where I want to.   But,   Cheryl, where can people find you?  

[02:14:27] Unknown:

Before we do that, I'm gonna show you one more picture.   One more picture.   Because we're talking about love and surrounding ourself with love, and you get what you,   you you get back what you give.   Okay?   And hold on, little guy.   Oh my goodness. Oh my goodness. Okay. Now I gotta share out. Oh, no. I am there. Okay.   Let's   this I am I've I'm coming home from surgery.   Can can you tell that he loves me? Let's let's zoom that in a little bit more.   Can you tell that   Hercules loves me? And he if you didn't see this, he's holding my hand.   Right. Yeah. And that's real. He just reached out to hold my hand and to gaze   into my eyes to let me know.  



[02:15:27] Unknown:

Then I'm I am there for   It's been a pleasure to having you, Cheryl.  

[02:15:41] Unknown:

Pleasure to have. It's a  

[02:15:43] Unknown:

pleasure also for,   I think for a lot of people to find the support in the story that you have to tell.   And it's a pleasure to see how you got out of that   situation   and the positivity you have and the strength   as a real feminine goddess.   You you can see it on the screen. You can see it.   And,   yeah, just like I said a few minutes ago, a lot of people,   see shiny bright laughs, but behind that laugh, there's a lot of fucking misery going on.   And,   well, everyone has a has a has a struggle. Everyone is fighting something. Right?   Yes. And,   when when you when you realize that,   then it's more time for to feel some compassion and some empathy for artists,   what they've been going through,   and especially have some empathy and some,   some good thoughts about yourself. I think that's, that that's one of the most reasons   why we're still here and we're having this podcast with both of us because it was just like   it could take it away, the the spirit of   the energy that we are trying to,   to share to others.  

And, yeah, once again, where can people find you, Cheryl?   Well, I don't have my website yet, but that'll be I'm sorry. I cut you off. Go ahead. Okay. No. No props. But then we're gonna really wrap it up because, otherwise, it's gonna have some problems with the data.   Yeah. That's why I wanted Lynn,   but I want wanted you to share the story as it is with all the things that you are   because that people will realize what,   what it can take to to to to get over that kind of situation.  

[02:17:30] Unknown:

Yeah. Yeah. And I do hope too that there might be some people out there who are ready to do some of that work, that deep work, because that's the kind of soul care that I do. I don't have a website yet. I'm in the the midst of doing that because like I said, I got licensed at 2020, and then   everything happened in terms of what was going on in the world and then the diagnosis. And it wasn't just until lately that I could start doing that again. I've already Right. But we we're gonna have our second meeting soon. Right now, I could see my Instagram, which is at s and my last name. So s s t u r I s.   Mhmm.  

And,   I'll give you well, I'll go ahead and send you my the the link to my Instagram   and also Yes.   Alevea link. If anybody wants to has any questions or anything, they can DM me on Instagram, and I'll answer any questions, and they can. I'll give them my website. They could go there and and look around, and if they wanna order.   And when I get Right. Site, we'll add that to it. But I will get you, this afternoon, I'll get you my contact so we can make sure it's in the  

[02:18:32] Unknown:

description. I'm gonna work a little bit on the on the video. Well, the video is probably not, the thing I'm gonna work about. The audio the audio I wanna pull out,   today,   but it has to do with with a lot   of things if it's gonna be alright.   Please send me one of the beautiful pictures that you want me to put on as the cover art for the for the show. Okay.   Yes. And we definitely gonna have a part two where I could cut you off a little bit more because now we know your story.   Now we can get get into some stuff. And and, again, thank you for,   for jumping on this organized production, Cheryl. You're a beautiful person. You're very strength. You you are very powerful. You know that.  

There's Jesus and and there's a lion work within you,   to to shine the light that you are.  

[02:19:21] Unknown:

Yes. And thank you for giving me a platform   to tell my story.   Because when you are strong,   a lot of people   think you just you're you're fine.   And you're and you're really I mean, you are. You're good, but you're not fine. You know? And so every you you have those people to be able to process that hard stuff with and and grapple with those things. You know?   And so there's a lot of people who really have not heard my story, even some people who really who who know me well and love me have not seen these pictures I've described. Got it. You know, there are a handful of people who've seen them. So this is,   this is part of my healing process.  

That's why I I'm taking the risk to put my story out there on the airwaves. That other video already has   it has the last I looked, it was 335   views in, like, six days.   And I don't I don't I'm not hanging my hat on anything. What it's just it's reaching people,   and it means that I'm doing this for the right reasons. And those who are supposed to hear it are gonna hear it. It's gonna change their life. That's why I'm doing it for them and for this this stage of my healing   so I can stand in what I know and what I own.   And even though,   it was hard and even though I'm strong and I was with went through it, anybody can make it through it if they change their mindset.  



[02:20:39] Unknown:

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.   And I think that's that's one of the things, you know, if if you use a platform like this   to talk about your own fears, to talk about your own journey, and to let other peoples talk about that journey,   Did you gonna have a platform with with love and support for a lot of other people that,   really need that? Because,   this is a big   world, which is not always positive, and we have to be very careful about the things that we think, the things that we say, and the things that we vibrate.   And it's like we said in the beginning, it's not like, oh, I got the fucking red pill. You shove it down your throat, and everything's gonna be all right. It's every single day, it's making decisions,   knowing the consequences,   and try to be the better version of yourself. And it's not an easy fucking task at all.  



[02:21:30] Unknown:

No. Not at all. Not at all. And every decision   adds up to where you're at. So   every thought is important.  

[02:21:39] Unknown:

Yes.   Kjell, thank you all the people listening to this Arizona episode from the Zora Neish productions. I wish you,   a grand rising,   beautiful day, or beautiful evening in Metaway, Colorado's beautiful planet.   And again, thank you and be aware for episode 100 because this is episode 99 if I'm not wrong.   And episode 100 has to be a special one, something like that. I don't know. I gotta figure something.  

[02:22:08] Unknown:

Yeah. You gotta figure out something really good for that one.   Yeah. It's a good I feel blessed to be your 90.   It's a good number because my birthday is 09/09.  

[02:22:21] Unknown:

Oh, wow. There you got it again. I mean  

[02:22:26] Unknown:

There we go. It's a hard way to end it. That's a nice way to end it, dude.  

[02:22:30] Unknown:

Yes. Absolutely.   Thank you, Cheryl. And, ladies and gentlemen, listeners, I hope you enjoyed the show. And contact Cheryl. I'll put everything in the show description   so you can contact her. You can get the product from Aloevia, just to be certain,   for America   to Cheryl's link. For Europe, you can get it through MyDaily. Not to fuck it up, but just to see how it is. Yes. Yes. Alright. Thank you, Shell, and have a beautiful day, Ellie. You as well, my friend. You as well. We'll talk soon. Thank you. Alright. Ciao.  

[02:23:02] Unknown:

Bye.  

[02:23:16] Unknown:

Running for all my life  

[02:23:18] Unknown:

with the devil on my heels.   He wasn't always kind,   and he couldn't fulfill my dreams.  

[02:23:26] Unknown:

I've been running for all my life  

[02:23:29] Unknown:

with the devil on my heels.   He wasn't always kind,   and he couldn't fulfill my dreams.   He's a pain in the ass.  

[02:23:41] Unknown:

He's black as a knight.   God  

[02:23:46] Unknown:

show me the light.   Please play   in the ass,   black as a night.   God show me the light, and it'll be   dreams. He's a pain in the ass.  

[02:24:15] Unknown:

Black as a night,  

[02:24:18] Unknown:

God's showing me light, and he'll be tight.  

[02:24:25] Unknown:

Tight.