In this lively episode, Ryan dives into the world of fun and games, sharing his enthusiasm for Chamba Casino, a platform offering a variety of social casino-style games with opportunities to win cash prizes. Ryan's love for fun is evident as he discusses his favorite winning moves and the excitement of new game releases and daily bonuses. He invites listeners to join in the fun and explore the entertaining offerings at Chamba Casino.
The episode takes a comedic turn with a humorous sketch featuring a circus theme. Ryan and his co-host engage in a playful dialogue filled with puns and jokes about circus life, wild animals, and the antics of a bumbling character named Costello. The sketch includes witty exchanges about circus performers, daring stunts, and the hilarity of mistaken identities, providing listeners with a delightful mix of humor and entertainment.
(00:00) Introduction and Winning Moves
(01:16) Circus Antics and Costello's Outfit
(04:08) Wild Animal Encounters
(08:11) Costello's Circus Job and Elephant Troubles
(12:05) Midway Adventures and Freak Show
(15:01) Princess Zaza and the Dancing Girls
(17:02) Costello's New Job and Lion Encounter
Listen to our radio station Old Time Radio https://link.radioking.com/otradio
Listen to other Shows at My Classic Radio https://www.myclassicradio.net/
Entertainment Radio | Broadcasting Classic Radio Shows | Patreon
Remember that times have changed, and some shows might not reflect the standards of today’s politically correct society. The shows do not necessarily reflect the views, standards, or beliefs of Entertainment Radio
[00:00:00]
Unknown:
It is Ryan here, and I have a question for you. What do you do when you win? Like, are you a fist pumper, a woo hooer, a hand clapper, a high fiver? I kinda like the high five, but if you wanna hone in on those winning moves, check out Chamba Casino. At chambacasino.com, choose from hundreds of social casino style games for your chance to redeem serious cash prizes. There are new game releases weekly plus free daily bonuses, so don't wait. Start having the most fun ever at chumbacasino.com. No purchase necessary. VWO. Point prohibited by law. See terms and conditions. 18 plus. Hey, guys. It is Ryan. I'm not sure if you know this about me, but I'm a bit of a fun fanatic when I can. I like to work, but I like fun too. It's a thing. And now the truth is out there. I can tell you about my favorite place to have fun, Chamba Casino. They have hundreds of
[00:01:16] Unknown:
I fly dirty air with the greatest of these. I'm the little fat man on the flying frappe. This makes me feel good to hang by my knees. But it would be awful if I had to sneeze. Yeah. I'll say it will be. Costello. Costello, for heaven's sake, what is that outfit you've got on? I'm I'm gonna enjoy circus. These are my circus tights. Circus tights? Yeah. That thing you are wearing is nothing but a suit of long underwear. Long underwear? Yeah. I thought I had a awful big hip pocket. Well, take that outfit off and forget about the circus. Oh, but I can't forget about the circus habit. Why not? I come from a family of circus people. My uncle Artie Stebbins was the world's greatest tight rope walker until he broke his neck. How did he break his neck? One night, he got up to walk the rope. He was tight and the rope wasn't.
Please. If you please talk, talk then, Gastello. Oh, then I had another uncle of the circus. He was seven feet tall. Seven feet tall? Yeah. He used to stick his head in the lion's mouth. What's his name? Now we'll call him Shorty. Shorty. What? What could you possibly do in a circus? Oh, I like to take 30 animals. I love animals, Abbot. I know that. Just consider the elephants. What's so marvelous about the elephants? I wrote a poll about elephants. You did? Let's see. Elephants are useful friends. They have handles on both ends. When elephants travel, they don't have the pack. They have the trunk in the front and a suitcase in back.
Nonsense, please. But really, I love animals out here. Yesterday, I was watching the circus play, and the old mama kangaroo was crying her heart out. So I walked up to her and I said, poor mama kangaroo, why are you crying? And she said, my son ran away and left me home in the bag. That's all. That's all. I've heard enough. Go ahead. However, I love all animals except the what's enough. Yeah. Well, that's what's enough. What's that? That's a little animal with black fur with a white stripe down its back. You're weird. That's a scum. That's what I said. A worse enough. A worse oh, I can't tell you no absolutely nothing about wild animals. Tell me. Have you ever had a biting, kicking, clawing, wild thing in your grasp? Yeah. Last night at the play. I said, no. No. No. No. No. No. Can I just learn? I don't know. Whoo.
I mean, you don't seem to understand. I mean, have you ever been big game hunting? Oh, I do that every night on Hollywood Boulevard. You go game hunting on Hollywood Boulevard? I I beg your pardon. I beg your pardon. I beg your pardon. I beg your pardon. I beg your pardon. I beg your pardon. I beg your pardon. I beg your pardon. I beg your pardon. I beg your pardon. I beg your pardon. I beg your pardon. I beg your pardon. I beg your pardon. I beg your pardon. I beg your pardon. No. No. No. Please answer my question. Yes, sir. Have you ever come face to face with a savage animal in the jungle? But you said you begged him? I did. I begged him to go away.
Then what happened? Then my mother came my brother came to my rescue, and I finally brought the line home stop. And what was he stuck with? My brother. With the other young brother? But, Bill, if you're so fearless if you're so fearless around wild animals, you don't have to join the circus. I can get you a job here in the next cars in picture with Johnny Weismower and Marine O'Sullivan. Oh, do I have to make love for mister Sullivan? No. Weismuller does that. Oh, I see. I'm just one of O'Sullivan's heels. Oh, yeah. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. That's not you're going to be the stuntman.
You see, in this picture, Weismuller is supposed to save miss O'Sullivan. Are you listening to me? I'm listening. My tits are falling down. Hold on. Come out with those kind of things. Don't be wearing those kind of things. What's wrong with you? Now let's do this. Weiszmuller is supposed to save miss O'Sullivan from a man eating lion. Yeah. But instead he calls for you to bite the lion. How about can he call? Why? I'll be in Paterson, New Jersey. Godzilla, this lion is tame. So am I, but I get hungry. I know. How much money do I get for fighting the lion? Oh, what do you care about? The money is the experience you need. Now now here's the scene. You're my stuntman, and I'm Johnny Weismullen. You're Johnny Weismullen? Yes. You must have left your muscles home and you're out of suit. No. No. Listen. I'm just trying to paint you a picture. Well, don't smear it up in the middle. See? Alright. Well, keep quiet a minute. Please. Now we're going through the jungle on all fours. Mhmm. First, I slunk through the bushes, then you slunk through the bushes, then I slunk again.
You slunk twice as much as I did. Are you sure it ain't slink? I slinked again? Now never mind. What's the difference? A lot of difference. We don't joke now. Will you Listen. I'm not looking for jokes. Now keep quiet. I'm serious. I'm I bet you're out in the jungle. Now keep quiet. And are you lost? No. No. No. No. Now what what's your step, please? What's your step and follow me? Come on. Was that was that a lion? Well, it wasn't something I asked. Great. Think through the bushes there. Do you see anything? Yes. There's a mama lion and a papa lion. Where are the cubs? They have to pay in Brooklyn this week. Watch out, Costello. Here comes the lion. What am I gonna do?
I'm gonna do do whatever the lion does. Yeah. He's staring at you. I'm staring back at him. He's showing his teeth. I'm showing my teeth. He's wagging the sail. That lets me out. I lay on. Suddenly suddenly the lion sees mister Sullivan, and he gets ready to spring. Moving closer, Costello, so he'll get you instead. Wait a minute. How much money am I getting for this? Paul, what do you care about the money is the experience you need? Here comes the lion. Quick sand. Quick sand. What do you mean quick sand? Quick sand for help. Stand where you are, Godzilla.
And there you are. The lion runs by you grab him by the mane. The mane what? Mane. Mane. Lion's neck. By the neck? I'm not in the mood. Rob, quick. Quick. I'll tell her. Grab the lion in your bare hands. Wait a minute. How much money do you say I'm getting? I do care about the money you think experience you need. Finally, you defeat the lion. There he goes slinking through the That's better. Slinking through the bush. Never mind. Slinking us, slushing it makes no difference. Slinking through the bushes. Even the lion slinks in this picture. Well, that's laid there. I lost too.
O'Sullivan is so happy he throws it. She throws herself into the hero's arms and kisses him. That's what I've been waiting for. Come into my arms, babe. Wait. I've been a Costello Weisz Muller's hero. You're just a stuntman. But I saved her life. Why can't I kiss her? You're not being paid to kiss her. What do I tell about the money? It's the experience, I mean. Well, that was a hot air on there. Mark, right now. Well, Castillo, you finally got a job in the second day. Yeah. Stick around, Attic, until I could throw water in these elephants. Hey, Jumbo. Here's your first bucketful.
Well, come on, Jumbo. Do I have to stick your head in the bucket? Castello, the other end is his trunk. Uh-huh. Oh, yeah. I have a hold of his fleece. There you are, Jumbo. Hey, Chumbo. Don't sweat that water all over me, Chumbo. You do that again. I'll tie a knot in your trunk. Okay, jumbo. I tell you what I do. Well, Cartella, did you tie a knot this round? Yeah. What do you know? He tied a knot by now. Well, come on. You're through with the elephants. Let's go over to the Midway and have some fun. To you, Bangla. You're the only girls in the world that can lick an envelope asterisk in the mailbox. You, fat boy.
Dip in and see the snake charmer, the human skeleton, the tattooed lady, all for a quarter. I won't be as far as I'm going there. Say, ain't you Luca Stello? That's me. You can go in for nothing. Courtesy to all freaks. Hey. How did you happen to become a dog prince boy? When I was a baby, I was scared by an Airedale. What's your excuse? Well, I was. Get out of here. Tell her, who is that young lady waving to us? You little boy. Oh, it's the actress, Bessie Mi Mucho. Hello, Bessie. Oh, I'm having such a jolly time here looking at all the attractions. Could I offer you boys some of my croaker joke?
Croaker joke? Sure, Abby. You know what croaker joke is? That's food court peepcorn. Why you talk I'll buy you talk right, Motro. Miss Booger, have you seen any other wild animals? Oh, yes. I saw the moochee, the barboos, and the crocodile. Wow. Where did it shoot out of your park? And they hit my cock with a hammer butt. Mister Donatello, you talk so great. Do you, by any chance, come from all of armor? No. I come from Portion, New Chelsea. Well, I'm going into the main test to see the ARC robots perform. A bone flaw material to you. And a pony squaw in the throat. You too.
Help, mother, please. Help. They are always focused. Those are all friends, Gary. Hey, Skye. Come here. What's the matter? I'm going to sue the circus. I was watching the Burbank Rider and somebody stepped on my face. Oh, positive. Didn't anybody step on your face? Well, I was crawling under the tent at the time. The whole circus is a fake anyway, laddies. I just bought a big bag of cotton candy. Well, what's the matter with it? It was pot rayon. Well, ladies, I gotta go find a place to sleep here at the circus. Scotty, you mean you're going to sleep out of here at the circus grounds tonight? Aye, lady. I can ride into town with a parade tomorrow and save car fare.
Call me. Gentlemen, I'm the India Rubber Man. Have a smoke on me. Gee. Thanks, India rubber man. This is a big day in my life, boys. Congratulate me. Oh, you have an addition to your family? Yes. My wife just presented me with a seven pound hot water bottle. Oh, you have an addition to your family? Yes. My wife just presented me with a seven boots. Never mind him. Here comes to be that lady. I've always wanted to meet one of them. Hey, Evan. There's no such thing. That's a man. No. It isn't. Here. I'll prove it to you. Hello, bearded lady. Hello. You're not really a lady. You're a man, ain't you? Oh, Donna. The fellow can never keep a fake roof. Hello?
Is everything around this circus a phony? No. Look. Here comes something genuine. It's the biggest attraction in the circus, Adam. The human skeleton. Hello, skeleton. I take your pardon. It's missus Niles. Now just a moment, Costello. Are you implying that my wife is skinny? And if she's willing to follow-up, she'd look like a string of peas. I Remember, you're working here. Now if you insult the customers, you'll lose your job and remember Oh, Costello, for you over the staircase. Why aren't you in your cage? Well, I just stepped out. Missus Miles, maybe I only have a little job now bringing water to the elephants, but next week, I'll have a bigger job. A bigger job? Yes, ma'am. I'm gonna watch the elephants.
Next week, you may not be with the circus. My wife happens to be chairman of the women's charity club that was responsible for this circus. Yes, Costello. I'll have you know that I helped bring this circus to town. What did you do? Pull one of the wagons? Now just a minute, Costello. You can't compare my wife to a horse. You're right, Ken. Her ears are too long. Well, Kenneth, did you hear what he said? My ears is too long. Are you gonna let him get by with that? No, dear. Costello, that should read her ears are too long. Well, I'll tell him that as a question, Niles. Just because you're running for mayor of Studio City, what are you gonna be, the old gray man?
Never mind, Kim Kettles. Costello, I'm going to the manager of this park who's gonna have you thrown off the lot. Don't do that, missus Niles. Please don't get me fired. I need the money for my animals. Last year, I went in the rabbit business and I lost a lot of money. You did? Yes, ma'am. I bought two rabbits. And do you know how many rabbits I have now? How many? Two? The man didn't tell me they were brothers. I have something to tell that young man. Costello, where are you? Hey. Here I am. Here I am. I I was over by the bear's cage feeding the little cubs some cookies. You're giving cookies to the bear cubs? Yeah. They were cupcakes. Why do the writers misty say things like that? A cocktail. I went to the manager and told them that you insulted me. And this time, young man, I think I have fixed your wagon. And you got just a wagon tongue that can do it.
Tell her she's trying to tell you that you're going to be fired. Missus Niles, why did you have to go and do that? I didn't really mean what I said. I think you're really a beautiful woman. You have lips just like pedals. Road pedals? No. Bicycle pedals. Oh, I've never been to Encuffet in all my life. I'm going right back to bed. Well, Cazzello, what are you gonna do now? Who cares about her? Hey. Look at it. Look. Look over there. The dancing girls are coming out on the midway. Come on. Alright, folks. Let's fight up and meet that great dancing girl, Princess Zaza. Zaza?
Zaza. Zaza's pretty name. Now the princess Zaza has the cleverest pair of feet in the world of third sickery. But I warn you, don't watch your feet too close to your missile dance. And here, folks, is the lovely princess
[00:15:35] Unknown:
in person. And now, ladies and gentlemen, I will fill any request number.
[00:15:41] Unknown:
Now what would you like for me to do? Come on over here. Kiss your poor old father. You are such a cute little man with you. Princess Arthur, you have a figure like Venus. For that, you may hold my hand. For that, you may hold my hand. For that, you may hold my hand. For that, you may hold my hand. For that, you may hold my hand. You are as beautiful as Helen of Troy. For that, that you may put your arm around my waist. You are as bewitching as Cleopatra. So that you may scream for the lure name. You are you are really such a cute little man, but you are too fast. You should take a setting up exercise. I wouldn't have to take him if I was set up like you.
That's Billy holding up the show. Yes, folks. Step up. Get your tickets on the inside. You'll see the princess dance and what a dance. She moves her muscles in every direction. Are you going to buy a ticket, little fat boy? Yeah. But don't move anything until I get there. Hey. Hey. What's going on here? What's going on? Oh, it's you, Costello. I've been looking for you. What are you doing here, Melanette? I'm the manager of this circus, Abbott. All my life, I've spent under the big tent. Don't look now for your head is pushing through it. Costello, I don't want any more cracks about my shiny dome. You better get it back to the crystal gazelle before she misses it. Look. I see us bored in that head. Never mind.
What about the head? Now look here, Costello. I didn't come here to argue with you. I've had a complaint about two for missus Niles in your fire. Now get off the lot. Please, mister Melanet. Don't make me leave my animals. I love them all. I even love that dangaroos kippel lot in that state. Dangaroos kippel? That's as dangerous. Keep away. Please, Melanet. Give Cuddel another job. You don't have to give him any, m o n e y. Well, alright. But he don't get any w a g e s. You guys don't have to spell in front of me. I don't like candy anyway. Well, Costello, I'll give you one more chance. I've got just the job for you. You see that hole in the canvas there? I want you to stick your head through it. What for? Well, you'll see a lot of people on the other side with baseballs in their hands. Now when you stick your head through the canvas, the game starts. Hey, Abbot. I'm gonna see a baseball game. Maybe if I use my head, I can get one of those balls. Alright, folks. Step right up and hit the little boy on the head. Can our folks step right up and hit the little boy on the head?
He means you, cottellips. People throw baseball at your head. John, if they hit you on the head, they get a pound of sugar. And all I get is a lump. Don't be silly. You can't get hurt. Now what happened to the boy that had this job before me? Here he comes now. Step aside and let the sister get off. Hey. Hey. Just a minute. I wanna ask that kid on the stretcher a question. Hey, boy. How do you feel? Is your head alright? Oh, yes. It's basically alright. I feel absolutely normal. And I'm so happy you came to see me, miss Lamar. That's all I wanna know, sir. Let me out of here, rabbit. I'm getting out of here. God, Phil. Stay where you are. Keep your head in that hole. That's right, Costello. Here, I'll throw a few practice balls to show you how simple the game is. Get ready, Costello. Here comes the ball.
Woo hoo hoo. Costello, get up. Get out off your knees and quit picking up that popcorn. What's popcorn? I'm picking up my teeth. Oh, a coward. I'll show you who's a coward motherfucker. You got me in the dish and I'm gonna set up with you. I see you take your coat off. Oh, yes? There. My coat's off. And my coat's off. I didn't pick off your shirt. Shirt. Oh, yeah? There. My shirt's off. My shirt's off. Alright. Now what are you gonna do about it? I'll scratch your back if you'll scratch mine. Help. Help, please. Help. Hey, Capilla. Capilla. That's Ken Miles yelling. Help. Help. Somebody do something. What's the matter? Oh, my lovely wife dropped her purse in the lion's cage and she went in after it. She's in there alone with the lion. Those poor lions. They'll have to defend themselves.
Come on, Catello. We haven't got a minute to lose. Open the door and let Castello in. Yeah. Open that door. And you wait a minute. Wait a minute. I just happen to think I gotta see Princess Zabda right away. But we've got to wrestle the lion. You wrestle what you like and I wrestle what I like. Get in there, Catello. Here comes the lion, Catello Graham. Alright. Alright. I got you. I got you. Brought you what stuff. Hey, rabbit. There was nothing to it. She's an old line. I've got my hand rammed right down her throat. Look. She hasn't even got any teeth. Cops, tell her, you fool. Take your hand out of my mouth.
It is Ryan here, and I have a question for you. What do you do when you win? Like, are you a fist pumper, a woo hooer, a hand clapper, a high fiver? I kinda like the high five, but if you wanna hone in on those winning moves, check out Chamba Casino. At chambacasino.com, choose from hundreds of social casino style games for your chance to redeem serious cash prizes. There are new game releases weekly plus free daily bonuses, so don't wait. Start having the most fun ever at chumbacasino.com. No purchase necessary. VWO. Point prohibited by law. See terms and conditions. 18 plus. Hey, guys. It is Ryan. I'm not sure if you know this about me, but I'm a bit of a fun fanatic when I can. I like to work, but I like fun too. It's a thing. And now the truth is out there. I can tell you about my favorite place to have fun, Chamba Casino. They have hundreds of
[00:01:16] Unknown:
I fly dirty air with the greatest of these. I'm the little fat man on the flying frappe. This makes me feel good to hang by my knees. But it would be awful if I had to sneeze. Yeah. I'll say it will be. Costello. Costello, for heaven's sake, what is that outfit you've got on? I'm I'm gonna enjoy circus. These are my circus tights. Circus tights? Yeah. That thing you are wearing is nothing but a suit of long underwear. Long underwear? Yeah. I thought I had a awful big hip pocket. Well, take that outfit off and forget about the circus. Oh, but I can't forget about the circus habit. Why not? I come from a family of circus people. My uncle Artie Stebbins was the world's greatest tight rope walker until he broke his neck. How did he break his neck? One night, he got up to walk the rope. He was tight and the rope wasn't.
Please. If you please talk, talk then, Gastello. Oh, then I had another uncle of the circus. He was seven feet tall. Seven feet tall? Yeah. He used to stick his head in the lion's mouth. What's his name? Now we'll call him Shorty. Shorty. What? What could you possibly do in a circus? Oh, I like to take 30 animals. I love animals, Abbot. I know that. Just consider the elephants. What's so marvelous about the elephants? I wrote a poll about elephants. You did? Let's see. Elephants are useful friends. They have handles on both ends. When elephants travel, they don't have the pack. They have the trunk in the front and a suitcase in back.
Nonsense, please. But really, I love animals out here. Yesterday, I was watching the circus play, and the old mama kangaroo was crying her heart out. So I walked up to her and I said, poor mama kangaroo, why are you crying? And she said, my son ran away and left me home in the bag. That's all. That's all. I've heard enough. Go ahead. However, I love all animals except the what's enough. Yeah. Well, that's what's enough. What's that? That's a little animal with black fur with a white stripe down its back. You're weird. That's a scum. That's what I said. A worse enough. A worse oh, I can't tell you no absolutely nothing about wild animals. Tell me. Have you ever had a biting, kicking, clawing, wild thing in your grasp? Yeah. Last night at the play. I said, no. No. No. No. No. No. Can I just learn? I don't know. Whoo.
I mean, you don't seem to understand. I mean, have you ever been big game hunting? Oh, I do that every night on Hollywood Boulevard. You go game hunting on Hollywood Boulevard? I I beg your pardon. I beg your pardon. I beg your pardon. I beg your pardon. I beg your pardon. I beg your pardon. I beg your pardon. I beg your pardon. I beg your pardon. I beg your pardon. I beg your pardon. I beg your pardon. I beg your pardon. I beg your pardon. I beg your pardon. I beg your pardon. No. No. No. Please answer my question. Yes, sir. Have you ever come face to face with a savage animal in the jungle? But you said you begged him? I did. I begged him to go away.
Then what happened? Then my mother came my brother came to my rescue, and I finally brought the line home stop. And what was he stuck with? My brother. With the other young brother? But, Bill, if you're so fearless if you're so fearless around wild animals, you don't have to join the circus. I can get you a job here in the next cars in picture with Johnny Weismower and Marine O'Sullivan. Oh, do I have to make love for mister Sullivan? No. Weismuller does that. Oh, I see. I'm just one of O'Sullivan's heels. Oh, yeah. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. That's not you're going to be the stuntman.
You see, in this picture, Weismuller is supposed to save miss O'Sullivan. Are you listening to me? I'm listening. My tits are falling down. Hold on. Come out with those kind of things. Don't be wearing those kind of things. What's wrong with you? Now let's do this. Weiszmuller is supposed to save miss O'Sullivan from a man eating lion. Yeah. But instead he calls for you to bite the lion. How about can he call? Why? I'll be in Paterson, New Jersey. Godzilla, this lion is tame. So am I, but I get hungry. I know. How much money do I get for fighting the lion? Oh, what do you care about? The money is the experience you need. Now now here's the scene. You're my stuntman, and I'm Johnny Weismullen. You're Johnny Weismullen? Yes. You must have left your muscles home and you're out of suit. No. No. Listen. I'm just trying to paint you a picture. Well, don't smear it up in the middle. See? Alright. Well, keep quiet a minute. Please. Now we're going through the jungle on all fours. Mhmm. First, I slunk through the bushes, then you slunk through the bushes, then I slunk again.
You slunk twice as much as I did. Are you sure it ain't slink? I slinked again? Now never mind. What's the difference? A lot of difference. We don't joke now. Will you Listen. I'm not looking for jokes. Now keep quiet. I'm serious. I'm I bet you're out in the jungle. Now keep quiet. And are you lost? No. No. No. No. Now what what's your step, please? What's your step and follow me? Come on. Was that was that a lion? Well, it wasn't something I asked. Great. Think through the bushes there. Do you see anything? Yes. There's a mama lion and a papa lion. Where are the cubs? They have to pay in Brooklyn this week. Watch out, Costello. Here comes the lion. What am I gonna do?
I'm gonna do do whatever the lion does. Yeah. He's staring at you. I'm staring back at him. He's showing his teeth. I'm showing my teeth. He's wagging the sail. That lets me out. I lay on. Suddenly suddenly the lion sees mister Sullivan, and he gets ready to spring. Moving closer, Costello, so he'll get you instead. Wait a minute. How much money am I getting for this? Paul, what do you care about the money is the experience you need? Here comes the lion. Quick sand. Quick sand. What do you mean quick sand? Quick sand for help. Stand where you are, Godzilla.
And there you are. The lion runs by you grab him by the mane. The mane what? Mane. Mane. Lion's neck. By the neck? I'm not in the mood. Rob, quick. Quick. I'll tell her. Grab the lion in your bare hands. Wait a minute. How much money do you say I'm getting? I do care about the money you think experience you need. Finally, you defeat the lion. There he goes slinking through the That's better. Slinking through the bush. Never mind. Slinking us, slushing it makes no difference. Slinking through the bushes. Even the lion slinks in this picture. Well, that's laid there. I lost too.
O'Sullivan is so happy he throws it. She throws herself into the hero's arms and kisses him. That's what I've been waiting for. Come into my arms, babe. Wait. I've been a Costello Weisz Muller's hero. You're just a stuntman. But I saved her life. Why can't I kiss her? You're not being paid to kiss her. What do I tell about the money? It's the experience, I mean. Well, that was a hot air on there. Mark, right now. Well, Castillo, you finally got a job in the second day. Yeah. Stick around, Attic, until I could throw water in these elephants. Hey, Jumbo. Here's your first bucketful.
Well, come on, Jumbo. Do I have to stick your head in the bucket? Castello, the other end is his trunk. Uh-huh. Oh, yeah. I have a hold of his fleece. There you are, Jumbo. Hey, Chumbo. Don't sweat that water all over me, Chumbo. You do that again. I'll tie a knot in your trunk. Okay, jumbo. I tell you what I do. Well, Cartella, did you tie a knot this round? Yeah. What do you know? He tied a knot by now. Well, come on. You're through with the elephants. Let's go over to the Midway and have some fun. To you, Bangla. You're the only girls in the world that can lick an envelope asterisk in the mailbox. You, fat boy.
Dip in and see the snake charmer, the human skeleton, the tattooed lady, all for a quarter. I won't be as far as I'm going there. Say, ain't you Luca Stello? That's me. You can go in for nothing. Courtesy to all freaks. Hey. How did you happen to become a dog prince boy? When I was a baby, I was scared by an Airedale. What's your excuse? Well, I was. Get out of here. Tell her, who is that young lady waving to us? You little boy. Oh, it's the actress, Bessie Mi Mucho. Hello, Bessie. Oh, I'm having such a jolly time here looking at all the attractions. Could I offer you boys some of my croaker joke?
Croaker joke? Sure, Abby. You know what croaker joke is? That's food court peepcorn. Why you talk I'll buy you talk right, Motro. Miss Booger, have you seen any other wild animals? Oh, yes. I saw the moochee, the barboos, and the crocodile. Wow. Where did it shoot out of your park? And they hit my cock with a hammer butt. Mister Donatello, you talk so great. Do you, by any chance, come from all of armor? No. I come from Portion, New Chelsea. Well, I'm going into the main test to see the ARC robots perform. A bone flaw material to you. And a pony squaw in the throat. You too.
Help, mother, please. Help. They are always focused. Those are all friends, Gary. Hey, Skye. Come here. What's the matter? I'm going to sue the circus. I was watching the Burbank Rider and somebody stepped on my face. Oh, positive. Didn't anybody step on your face? Well, I was crawling under the tent at the time. The whole circus is a fake anyway, laddies. I just bought a big bag of cotton candy. Well, what's the matter with it? It was pot rayon. Well, ladies, I gotta go find a place to sleep here at the circus. Scotty, you mean you're going to sleep out of here at the circus grounds tonight? Aye, lady. I can ride into town with a parade tomorrow and save car fare.
Call me. Gentlemen, I'm the India Rubber Man. Have a smoke on me. Gee. Thanks, India rubber man. This is a big day in my life, boys. Congratulate me. Oh, you have an addition to your family? Yes. My wife just presented me with a seven pound hot water bottle. Oh, you have an addition to your family? Yes. My wife just presented me with a seven boots. Never mind him. Here comes to be that lady. I've always wanted to meet one of them. Hey, Evan. There's no such thing. That's a man. No. It isn't. Here. I'll prove it to you. Hello, bearded lady. Hello. You're not really a lady. You're a man, ain't you? Oh, Donna. The fellow can never keep a fake roof. Hello?
Is everything around this circus a phony? No. Look. Here comes something genuine. It's the biggest attraction in the circus, Adam. The human skeleton. Hello, skeleton. I take your pardon. It's missus Niles. Now just a moment, Costello. Are you implying that my wife is skinny? And if she's willing to follow-up, she'd look like a string of peas. I Remember, you're working here. Now if you insult the customers, you'll lose your job and remember Oh, Costello, for you over the staircase. Why aren't you in your cage? Well, I just stepped out. Missus Miles, maybe I only have a little job now bringing water to the elephants, but next week, I'll have a bigger job. A bigger job? Yes, ma'am. I'm gonna watch the elephants.
Next week, you may not be with the circus. My wife happens to be chairman of the women's charity club that was responsible for this circus. Yes, Costello. I'll have you know that I helped bring this circus to town. What did you do? Pull one of the wagons? Now just a minute, Costello. You can't compare my wife to a horse. You're right, Ken. Her ears are too long. Well, Kenneth, did you hear what he said? My ears is too long. Are you gonna let him get by with that? No, dear. Costello, that should read her ears are too long. Well, I'll tell him that as a question, Niles. Just because you're running for mayor of Studio City, what are you gonna be, the old gray man?
Never mind, Kim Kettles. Costello, I'm going to the manager of this park who's gonna have you thrown off the lot. Don't do that, missus Niles. Please don't get me fired. I need the money for my animals. Last year, I went in the rabbit business and I lost a lot of money. You did? Yes, ma'am. I bought two rabbits. And do you know how many rabbits I have now? How many? Two? The man didn't tell me they were brothers. I have something to tell that young man. Costello, where are you? Hey. Here I am. Here I am. I I was over by the bear's cage feeding the little cubs some cookies. You're giving cookies to the bear cubs? Yeah. They were cupcakes. Why do the writers misty say things like that? A cocktail. I went to the manager and told them that you insulted me. And this time, young man, I think I have fixed your wagon. And you got just a wagon tongue that can do it.
Tell her she's trying to tell you that you're going to be fired. Missus Niles, why did you have to go and do that? I didn't really mean what I said. I think you're really a beautiful woman. You have lips just like pedals. Road pedals? No. Bicycle pedals. Oh, I've never been to Encuffet in all my life. I'm going right back to bed. Well, Cazzello, what are you gonna do now? Who cares about her? Hey. Look at it. Look. Look over there. The dancing girls are coming out on the midway. Come on. Alright, folks. Let's fight up and meet that great dancing girl, Princess Zaza. Zaza?
Zaza. Zaza's pretty name. Now the princess Zaza has the cleverest pair of feet in the world of third sickery. But I warn you, don't watch your feet too close to your missile dance. And here, folks, is the lovely princess
[00:15:35] Unknown:
in person. And now, ladies and gentlemen, I will fill any request number.
[00:15:41] Unknown:
Now what would you like for me to do? Come on over here. Kiss your poor old father. You are such a cute little man with you. Princess Arthur, you have a figure like Venus. For that, you may hold my hand. For that, you may hold my hand. For that, you may hold my hand. For that, you may hold my hand. For that, you may hold my hand. You are as beautiful as Helen of Troy. For that, that you may put your arm around my waist. You are as bewitching as Cleopatra. So that you may scream for the lure name. You are you are really such a cute little man, but you are too fast. You should take a setting up exercise. I wouldn't have to take him if I was set up like you.
That's Billy holding up the show. Yes, folks. Step up. Get your tickets on the inside. You'll see the princess dance and what a dance. She moves her muscles in every direction. Are you going to buy a ticket, little fat boy? Yeah. But don't move anything until I get there. Hey. Hey. What's going on here? What's going on? Oh, it's you, Costello. I've been looking for you. What are you doing here, Melanette? I'm the manager of this circus, Abbott. All my life, I've spent under the big tent. Don't look now for your head is pushing through it. Costello, I don't want any more cracks about my shiny dome. You better get it back to the crystal gazelle before she misses it. Look. I see us bored in that head. Never mind.
What about the head? Now look here, Costello. I didn't come here to argue with you. I've had a complaint about two for missus Niles in your fire. Now get off the lot. Please, mister Melanet. Don't make me leave my animals. I love them all. I even love that dangaroos kippel lot in that state. Dangaroos kippel? That's as dangerous. Keep away. Please, Melanet. Give Cuddel another job. You don't have to give him any, m o n e y. Well, alright. But he don't get any w a g e s. You guys don't have to spell in front of me. I don't like candy anyway. Well, Costello, I'll give you one more chance. I've got just the job for you. You see that hole in the canvas there? I want you to stick your head through it. What for? Well, you'll see a lot of people on the other side with baseballs in their hands. Now when you stick your head through the canvas, the game starts. Hey, Abbot. I'm gonna see a baseball game. Maybe if I use my head, I can get one of those balls. Alright, folks. Step right up and hit the little boy on the head. Can our folks step right up and hit the little boy on the head?
He means you, cottellips. People throw baseball at your head. John, if they hit you on the head, they get a pound of sugar. And all I get is a lump. Don't be silly. You can't get hurt. Now what happened to the boy that had this job before me? Here he comes now. Step aside and let the sister get off. Hey. Hey. Just a minute. I wanna ask that kid on the stretcher a question. Hey, boy. How do you feel? Is your head alright? Oh, yes. It's basically alright. I feel absolutely normal. And I'm so happy you came to see me, miss Lamar. That's all I wanna know, sir. Let me out of here, rabbit. I'm getting out of here. God, Phil. Stay where you are. Keep your head in that hole. That's right, Costello. Here, I'll throw a few practice balls to show you how simple the game is. Get ready, Costello. Here comes the ball.
Woo hoo hoo. Costello, get up. Get out off your knees and quit picking up that popcorn. What's popcorn? I'm picking up my teeth. Oh, a coward. I'll show you who's a coward motherfucker. You got me in the dish and I'm gonna set up with you. I see you take your coat off. Oh, yes? There. My coat's off. And my coat's off. I didn't pick off your shirt. Shirt. Oh, yeah? There. My shirt's off. My shirt's off. Alright. Now what are you gonna do about it? I'll scratch your back if you'll scratch mine. Help. Help, please. Help. Hey, Capilla. Capilla. That's Ken Miles yelling. Help. Help. Somebody do something. What's the matter? Oh, my lovely wife dropped her purse in the lion's cage and she went in after it. She's in there alone with the lion. Those poor lions. They'll have to defend themselves.
Come on, Catello. We haven't got a minute to lose. Open the door and let Castello in. Yeah. Open that door. And you wait a minute. Wait a minute. I just happen to think I gotta see Princess Zabda right away. But we've got to wrestle the lion. You wrestle what you like and I wrestle what I like. Get in there, Catello. Here comes the lion, Catello Graham. Alright. Alright. I got you. I got you. Brought you what stuff. Hey, rabbit. There was nothing to it. She's an old line. I've got my hand rammed right down her throat. Look. She hasn't even got any teeth. Cops, tell her, you fool. Take your hand out of my mouth.
Introduction and Winning Moves
Circus Antics and Costello's Outfit
Wild Animal Encounters
Costello's Circus Job and Elephant Troubles
Midway Adventures and Freak Show
Princess Zaza and the Dancing Girls
Costello's New Job and Lion Encounter
