In this lively episode, we dive into the comedic world of Dennis Day, where a simple interview spirals into a town-wide gender role reversal. Dennis inadvertently becomes a hero among men after being misquoted in a newspaper article, leading to a humorous exploration of gender dynamics. As the men of the town attempt to take on domestic duties, chaos ensues, highlighting the challenges and hilarity of stepping into each other's shoes.
Meanwhile, the women of the town decide to embrace the men's roles, leading to a series of comedic events that culminate in a heartfelt resolution. Through witty dialogue and slapstick scenarios, this episode offers a humorous yet insightful look at the complexities of gender roles and the importance of understanding and cooperation between the sexes.
(01:43) Introduction to Dennis Day
(06:10) Dennis Day's Misquoted Interview
(14:15) Dennis Day's New Job Offer
(20:36) The Women's Revolt
(25:06) Men Take Over Household Duties
(31:34) Conclusion and Farewell
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[00:00:31] Unknown:
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[00:01:44] Unknown:
Ladies and gentlemen, Dennis Day.
[00:01:49] Unknown:
Oh, I make life seem worthwhile. Wealth in your
[00:02:01] Unknown:
Dennis Day is brought to you by Colgate Dental Cream and Luster Cream shampoo. Colgate Dental Cream to clean your breath while you clean your teeth. Luster Cream shampoo for soft glamorous dream girl hair. The dentist day show with Barbara Eiler, b. Benedetta, Dick Trout, Charles Dance in the orchestra, and yours truly, Verne Smith, is written by Frank Galen and stars our popular young singer in A Day in the Life of Dennis Day. Here's Dennis to sing There Ought to be a Society.
[00:02:42] Unknown:
There ought to be a society for the prevention of cruelty to poor unfortunate lovers. Poor unfortunate lovers. Poor unfortunate lovers like me. There ought to be a society for the extension of sympathy. Poor Poor unfortunate lovers. Poor unfortunate lovers. Poor unfortunate lovers like me. If you beat up a dog or a cat, you go to jail for the maximum penalty. They got protection laws for the dumb animal, but nobody cares about me. When I get beat, so I repeat. There ought to be a society for the prevention of cruelty to poor unfortunate lovers.
Poor unfortunate lovers. Poor unfortunate lovers like me. Oh, when you go for a walk in the zoo, you never try for to beat up the chimpanzee. They got the iron cage and the keeper to boot. The monkey is better than me. He'd run at me. Say he agreed. There ought to be a society for the prevention of cruelty to poor unfortunate lovers. Poor and poor,
[00:04:38] Unknown:
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[00:06:11] Unknown:
Well, as you needn't be told, there are numerous ways for people to get into trouble. Some folks go out looking for it, others can see it coming but can't avoid it, and still others fall into it unconsciously. It's to this third or unconscious group that our young hero, Dennis Day, belongs, which is only reasonable considering the head start he has. Now take what happened to him yesterday morning, for instance. He was walking down Oak Street quite unconcernedly, minding his own business when suddenly Good morning, young man.
[00:06:39] Unknown:
Good morning. I'm the inquiring reporter of the Weaverville Bugle and I'd like to ask you a question,
[00:06:44] Unknown:
for my column. Do you mind? Well, no. Not if I can. Good. What's your name and address? Dennis Dade. Three twenty four Elm Street. Gee, I thought it was gonna be tougher than that.
[00:06:56] Unknown:
That, isn't the question, my boy. What I wanna know is your opinion of women. Women? Yes. Do you think the women of today are prepared for motherhood?
[00:07:05] Unknown:
Gee, I hope so. If they're not, I don't know who to
[00:07:13] Unknown:
tell to get ready. No. No. You don't understand, sir. I'm looking for a good controversial statement on the subject of women. Oh. Now, do you happen to be in love with more than one woman? Me? Of course not. That's what I want. I have no love for the overwhelming majority of women, says mister Dennis Day of 324 Elm Street. Hey, wait. What's a little housework cooking, washing, and baby minding, continues mister Day? It's the men who do the real work in this world. Women should get down on their knees to them. But all I What a statement. Mister Day, you took the words right out of my mouth. Well, maybe we still have time to put them back in. You're not gonna print this, are you? Well, I'm only quoting what you said, mister Day.
Tell me, do you think women have good reasons for always whining and complaining? But they don't. Women have no good reasons for always whining and complaining. Now look, mister Do you know why women should be treated as your equals, mister Day? No. Why? Dennis Day doesn't know why women should be treated as your equals. Mister, please, you can't do this to me. Why not? You believe the man should be the head of the family, don't you? Well, yes. But I You think if a man asks his wife a civil question, she should answer him, don't you? Well, sure. Attaboy. Women should speak when they're spoken to, says mister Smith.
[00:08:32] Unknown:
Now you're talking. I must be doing it in code.
[00:08:38] Unknown:
Mister Day, I congratulate you. There isn't one man in a thousand who'd come out to say the things you have. Including me. Everything I say, you twist around. I demand that you print my exact words. Alright. If that's the way you feel, I'll use a direct quotation from you for my lead line. Do you wear perfume, mister Day? Perfume? Of course not. Why not? Well, it makes a person smell. Well, women wear it, don't they? Well, sure. But Wonderful. Goodbye and thank you for a great lead line. What lead line? Dennis Day says women smell. Hello.
[00:09:11] Unknown:
Oi. What happened?
[00:09:19] Unknown:
So back our hero slunk to the Anderson boarding house where he knew it was the better part of valor to say nothing of his interview, especially to his landlady, missus Anderson, and his girlfriend, Mildred. But he also knew what would happen when the paper came out the following morning. And sure enough, just after he had risen
[00:09:36] Unknown:
Oh my golly. Here it comes.
[00:09:39] Unknown:
Oh, it's you, mister Anderson. Dennis, you doll face, you dreamboat, you joy boy. This article of yours in the paper, this emancipation proclamation for husbands. Women should not be treated as equals. They should get down on their knees to the men. Where'd you ever get such magnificent ideas? Gee, I don't know, but every time that reporter opened his mouth, I seem to have another one. You're a hero, my boy. Why, there isn't a husband in this whole town who doesn't feel like a different man toward his wife this morning? Gee, even you?
[00:10:21] Unknown:
Wow.
[00:10:21] Unknown:
I've had five phone calls from friends this morning and they all feel like I do. My boy, this could develop into a crusade. You mean we men are gonna demand equal rights with women? Dennis, please. I said we were crusaders, not radicals. Oh, beg pardon. But there's a feeling inside me this morning that I never had before, and I wouldn't be surprised by what it's courage. Courage? Certainly seems to be from the descriptions I've read of it.
[00:10:53] Unknown:
Gosh, mister Anderson. How are the women gonna take this?
[00:10:56] Unknown:
Oh, jiggers. Here comes your wife. Good morning, missus Anderson. Don't you good morning me, Dennis Day. Are you responsible for this article in the newspaper?
[00:11:04] Unknown:
You're darn right he's responsible. You wanna make something out of it? Herbert Anderson, are you addressing me? Well, I ain't addressing John L. Lewis, kiddo. It's about time you women learn to live respect for us men. You understand?
[00:11:23] Unknown:
Why? Why?
[00:11:25] Unknown:
Yes, Herbert. Good.
[00:11:28] Unknown:
Now drag those big feet of yours to the stove and get me some breakfast. Yes. Of course, lovers. See what my friend wants here too.
[00:11:41] Unknown:
I should cook breakfast for Dennis Day over my dead body.
[00:11:46] Unknown:
Look out, kiddo. That can be arranged.
[00:11:54] Unknown:
Yes, Herbert. What would you like, Dennis? Gee, missus Anderson.
[00:11:59] Unknown:
Ma'am, I Dennis, try fumbling around. Climb on the bandwagon. Enjoy.
[00:12:05] Unknown:
Okay. I
[00:12:07] Unknown:
I'd like a couple of three minute eggs. Very well. Make it fast, understand? I want you back here with them in two minutes.
[00:12:17] Unknown:
Very well, poopsies.
[00:12:20] Unknown:
Oh, my gosh. It's the millennium.
[00:12:22] Unknown:
And I tell you, it's that interview. All over town, men are acting just like me.
[00:12:27] Unknown:
Son, we owe you a debt of gratitude we can never repay. Gee, imagine. Why, I had no idea. I never Well, there you are, Dennis Day. Oh, hello, Mildred. Don't you even speak to me, you you man you?
[00:12:40] Unknown:
Dennis, did you hear what she called you? Yeah. Even I've been promoted.
[00:12:47] Unknown:
I suppose you think you're pretty smart, don't you? You and your interview. Up and at her, Dennis. Remember, this is the revolution. Yeah. Watch your tone, Mildred Anderson. Just remember your sex. Your party is no longer in power. What? Turn in your belt, kiddo. You're not wearing the pants anymore.
[00:13:09] Unknown:
So that's your attitude, is it? Very well, today. I only spoke to you at all because I had this note for you. Here and goodbye.
[00:13:17] Unknown:
Attaboy, Dennis. Keep women at a distance. That's our motto.
[00:13:22] Unknown:
Gee, I don't know. Do you think we'll enjoy them just as fully that way?
[00:13:27] Unknown:
More? Well, now who's the note from? Aren't you gonna open it? Oh. Oh, yeah. Of course.
[00:13:34] Unknown:
Gee, it's from some man I don't even know. Dear mister Day, read what you said about women in this morning's paper. If you are still alive when this letter reaches you, I have a job open for you. But if you are not available, at least send me your autograph. Sincerely yours, HR Norwood, owner of the Bon Ton Shoe Store. Wow. Isn't that great, mister Anderson? I'll go see him right away. Didn't I tell you, my boy? You're a hero. You've finally become a name in this town. Oh, I always was. But at last I'm becoming one you can say in polite company. Pardon me. Mister HR Norwood? Yes?
I'm Dennis Day. You wrote me a letter? Oh, oh, I did. I did. Sit down, mister Day. Sit down.
[00:14:25] Unknown:
My goodness. Let me look at you. So you're the boy who said all those glorious things about the opposite, if you'll pardon the expression, sex. Yes, sir. I guess I am. Oh, my goodness. I never met a man with your courage in my life. I just never did. That's all. No. I give you my word. When I read your article, my hair just stood on, if you'll pardon the expression, and Geez. What courage, I said to myself. What courage? What courage? What courage? You're hard of hearing? No. No. No. No. I I just repeat things once in a while. Well, I suppose you're wondering about the job I mentioned. Oh, yes, sir. I am. Well, good. Well, you see, I I sell shoes here. Women's shoes. You know why? No. Why? I hate women.
Well,
[00:15:20] Unknown:
then why do you sell women's shoes?
[00:15:22] Unknown:
Could you think of a better revenge on them? Oh, no, sir. But where do I come in? Oh, I can see you've never waited on a woman in the shoe store in my voice. Box after box you pull down from the shelf and still they're not satisfied. This one's the wrong color. That one's the wrong size. Don't fit. Up the ladder, down the by noon, I am such a nervous track that you can hear me puffing. If you'll borrow me expressions, pat all over the place.
[00:15:48] Unknown:
It does sound kinda wearing a Oh, yes. But it won't be for you. Hold on. No. No. You'll make them buy the shoes they ought to have. Yeah. And right Brian Seacrest here. When you have a busy schedule, it's important to maximize your downtime. One of the best ways to do that is by going to chumbacasino.com. Chumba Casino has all your favorite social casino games, like spin slots, bingo, and solitaire that you can play for free for a chance to redeem some serious prizes. So hop on to chumbacasino.com
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[00:17:15] Unknown:
Hey. Me? Oh, certainly. You're not afraid of women. You will, if you'll pardon the expression, gird up here, if you'll pardon the expression, loins and fight.
[00:17:23] Unknown:
But mister Norwood, I Uh-uh. Uh-uh.
[00:17:26] Unknown:
Now the pay on this job, I might add, is excellent. The pay? How much is it? Well, it used to be $22 a week, but I'll take her. $22
[00:17:37] Unknown:
a week? Boy, that's the best offer I ever had.
[00:17:40] Unknown:
In that case, the dickering is over. Now, give me the deal, my boy. Gee, how can I turn it down? Oh, good lad. Good lad. Now all you have to do oh, good gravy. Here comes the customer now. Go to work, my boy. Gosh, already? Don't you worry. This is one of the sweetest customers we have. Good morning, Mrs. Harris. Good morning. Welcome, dear lady. My clerk will take excellent care of you, I am sure. Very well. I'd like a pair of black pokes, young man. Sit down.
[00:18:11] Unknown:
What? You heard me squat. Now what size do you take, Fatso?
[00:18:25] Unknown:
Why? Why the ones I have on are three and a half. Triple A. And these will be just your size. Here. Eight feet.
[00:18:34] Unknown:
Eight feet? Why, I never I know. And it's about time you started. Here's the shoes. Now give me the money. But, come on. Give me the money.
[00:18:43] Unknown:
Yeah. Yes. Of course. Here.
[00:18:47] Unknown:
Oh, good boy, Dennis. I knew you could do it. I knew you weren't scared of any woman whoever you need to
[00:18:58] Unknown:
oh my goodness gracious me. The boy spades it.
[00:19:06] Unknown:
We'll continue this day in the life of Dennis Day in just a moment. Meanwhile, here's Dennis to sing, you were meant for me.
[00:19:19] Unknown:
You were men for me. I wasn't men for you.
[00:20:36] Unknown:
Well, Dennis certainly started something when he allowed himself to be quoted by an inquiring reporter to the effect that women have a cinch and that the men do all the work. To the men, of course, he's a hero, but to the women,
[00:20:47] Unknown:
well, let's listen to a meeting of the distaff side now taking place at the Anderson Boarding House. Dan has actually talked to you that way, missus Harris? Why I can hardly believe. Since that interview of his appeared, all the men are talking that way. I'll say they are. Do you know what your father said to me this morning, Mildred? What? He told me to shut my big mouth before he kicks it shut. Why, he hasn't spoken to me like that since I fell off a horse in 1922 and had full of arms and a calf. Well, now something's got to be done.
Why don't we show the men how easy our job is? Let them do what we've been doing for a while, and we'll lead the lives they've been leading. Oh, golly, missus Harris. That sounds wonderful. Not to me it doesn't. I'd have to go back to doing the housework around here.
[00:21:38] Unknown:
But not the cookie, mother. Oh, I think it's a marvelous idea. We'll call every woman in town and get them started right away. Yes. Let's see how the men like doing women's work for a change. And it'll certainly be fun for us doing what the men do.
[00:21:52] Unknown:
Yes. I've got a slight head start. A head start? Sure. I've been enjoying my husband's cigar for years now.
[00:22:14] Unknown:
How's the dinner coming, Dennis? Alright, I guess. Gee, mister Anderson, wasn't it kinda peculiar, your wife leaving a note saying she and Mildred wouldn't be home for supper, and if we wanted any, we should cook it ourselves?
[00:22:24] Unknown:
Well, it is a little peculiar, But we'll show them that we can cook just as good at dinner as they can. Did you taste that soup yet, Dennis? Yeah. The soup over here in this pot is cooler, but it tastes better, I think. That's the dishwater from lunch.
[00:22:40] Unknown:
Oh.
[00:22:41] Unknown:
Are the baked potatoes nearly ready? Mashed potatoes. I thought you said we were gonna have baked potatoes. We were, but they fell on the floor and I stepped on them by my feet.
[00:22:51] Unknown:
Oh, well, say, do you suppose those steaks of mine are done by now? Well, Oh, how long have you had them on? Well, let's see. It's 08:15. Oh, about an hour.
[00:23:02] Unknown:
Oh, give them a little longer. We don't want them raw.
[00:23:05] Unknown:
No. I guess not. Did you take a look at those muffins? No. I guess I better. Yeah. We gotta watch them. I don't like them dark brown.
[00:23:12] Unknown:
How do you feel about jet black?
[00:23:21] Unknown:
My. I'm glad Poopsie didn't see those. Take them out, Dennis. Okay. Dear, dear. Well, now don't you worry. We'll show those women that us men can take over. You bet we will. Sure. Why not? Men can do anything that women can do. Darn right they can't. Oh, say, isn't that someone coming up to walk, mister Anderson? Well, yes. So it is. It's mister Harris. Like, good heavens, he's carrying a baby. Gee, you don't suppose he?
[00:23:50] Unknown:
No. Of course not. I'll let him in.
[00:23:52] Unknown:
Hello, mister Harris. Gee, fellas. Look what I had. What? To take care of. Oh. Well, yes, my wife and daughter went out and left him with me. Got kinda lonely. He's only four months old and doesn't say much. So I came over here for some company.
[00:24:11] Unknown:
Well, good. So you're just in time for dinner. I'll have it on the table in a jiffy. Gee, you're lucky the little fella's sleeping so nice and peacefully, mister Harris. Most babies don't, you know? Yeah. I know. But I gave this one a little shot of whiskey before we worked fine. See? There's male brains. I'll guarantee a woman never would have thought of that. No.
[00:24:33] Unknown:
But I wish I knew what to do when it's time to change him. They didn't leave me any instructions on that. Oh, I can show you that, miss Harris. I don't go to the movies twice a week for nothing, you know. Hand me a napkin. Here you are. Let's see this. Well, first you take this end and criss cross it to the other side and pin it like this. Yeah. See? Then you criss cross the other side over to this one and pin it. Now you take the under flap and pull it over here and pin it like this. Now what? Well, if I could think of a way to get my hand out, it'd be
[00:25:05] Unknown:
perfect.
[00:25:07] Unknown:
Well, you better just let him sleep, mister Harris. Dinner's all set. Sit down boys. Okay. Well, dig in everybody.
[00:25:17] Unknown:
You first, mister Harris. You're the oldest.
[00:25:21] Unknown:
What's that got to do with it? You've lived your life already. I suppose you did. It looks fine, but to tell the truth, I'm not very hungry.
[00:25:34] Unknown:
You know something? I kinda wish I had my wife back. Yeah. This isn't very much
[00:25:40] Unknown:
Hey. Isn't that somebody outside? Our wives.
[00:25:44] Unknown:
They finally come home to apologize. Oh,
[00:25:47] Unknown:
so that she said, really? I thought you said itching.
[00:25:55] Unknown:
Well, and just where have you three been until this hour?
[00:25:59] Unknown:
Around. We dropped in at the pool room and shot a little snooker.
[00:26:05] Unknown:
Snooker? Yes. And then we stopped in at the fight for a few minutes. And we wound up at the burlesque show. Wow.
[00:26:15] Unknown:
Wow. That sickened boy from the list. Hey, Clara. You ain't just big ear gums, kiddo. Well, did you boys have a nice evening together? We kinda missed you ladies. Oh, you'll get used to it in a few months.
[00:26:32] Unknown:
No, poopsie. Don't say that. You did this to West Tennessee? Me? Yes. With that cool interview of yours. Please, ladies, reconsider. Take us back the way we were. Give us men our happy slavehood again.
[00:26:48] Unknown:
Well Please, missus Anderson. I was wrong to talk about women the way I did. There's room in this world for two sexes. In fact, in many ways, it's a very nice arrangement.
[00:26:58] Unknown:
Well, do you really think you've learned your lesson, Herbert? Oh, I have. I do, cuddle. I do. Take me back, please.
[00:27:07] Unknown:
Very well. If you're truly sorry, we'll forget this ever happened. Oh, thank you, missus Anderson. Oh,
[00:27:13] Unknown:
Pootsy. You darling, come here and let me clasp you to my manly stomach once again.
[00:27:32] Unknown:
Dennis Day will be back in just one minute to sing Song of Songs. But first Dream
[00:27:38] Unknown:
girl, dream girl, beautiful luster cream girl. Hair that gleams and glistens from a luster cream shampoo.
[00:27:53] Unknown:
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[00:28:31] Unknown:
Dream girl, dream girl, beautiful luster cream girl. You owe your crowning glory to a Luster cream shampoo.
[00:28:53] Unknown:
Here now is Dennis with the music of Charles Dant and the orchestra singing Song of Songs.
[00:29:02] Unknown:
Do you recall that night in June when first we met? Do you remember all the words we spoke?
[00:31:34] Unknown:
Good night everybody.
[00:31:41] Unknown:
Next week, tune in to another dentist day show brought to you by Colgate Dental Cream to clean your breath while you clean your teeth, and luster cream shampoo for soft glamorous dream girl hair. This is Verne Smith speaking. Good night, everyone.
[00:31:59] Unknown:
This is NBC, the National Broadcasting Company.
[00:32:09] Unknown:
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[00:32:30] Unknown:
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[00:32:43] Unknown:
20 1 Precinct was a police drama broadcast on CBS from 07/07/1953, to 07/26/1956. It initially served as a summer replacement for My Friend Irma. The show was produced in cooperation with the Patrolmen's Benevolent Association of City of New York and adaptations from True Criminal in New York. The Policeman's Point of View Historically, the 20 First Precinct had been located near Gramercy Park, Manhattan. In 1929, the department reorganized the precinct numbering, and 20 First designation was discontinued. No such precinct existed during the run, nor does a 20 First Precinct exist.
However, the fictional precinct's territory closely corresponds to that of the upper side's 20 Third Precinct since 01/1992. Come and listen at myclassicradio.net.