In this thrilling episode, we delve into the intriguing world of insurance, showboats, and a high-stakes gamble on the River Thames. Sir William Hedges, concerned about the safety of a Mississippi showboat brought to England by Seamus Camber, hires a private fire guard to ensure the vessel's safety. As the showboat prepares for its maiden voyage up the Thames, tensions rise with the introduction of mysterious characters, including Duke Delaney and Constance Maston, each with their own hidden agendas.
As the story unfolds, we witness a blend of suspense and deception. Seamus Camber, a reformed gambler, finds himself entangled in a plot orchestrated by Delaney, who aims to exploit the showboat for his own gain. With the help of a special officer from Interpol, the truth is revealed, and the real villain is brought to justice. This episode is a captivating tale of intrigue, redemption, and the unexpected twists that keep listeners on the edge of their seats.
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[00:00:00]
Unknown:
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[00:00:15] Unknown:
I've been looking at the insurance policy for this Sherbert. It's due in The Thames tomorrow night. Premium is higher, but I see the sum insured is £50,000. No. Frankly, buddy, I'm a little worried. Worried, sir William. Yes. Looking at the specifications, I see that she was first constructed on the Mississippi in 1889 or timber construction, which is powered by a coal fed burner.
[00:00:46] Unknown:
Hence the fire hazard must be high. No doubt that's why the premium is so high.
[00:00:51] Unknown:
The actor probably knows his business but I'd like a special fire guard on board while she's here. Shall I get in touch with the London fire brigade? No. No. No. No. No. No. We must engage someone privately. Ring up this number, 595, and make an appointment for me to see a man called Aubrey Mason. Their offices are at 33 Half Moon Street.
[00:01:34] Unknown:
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[00:03:34] Unknown:
Sir William Hedges was well known to me. He is in fact a member of my club. Knowing that he was concerned with a big insurance company in the city and much of our work is connected with this type of company, I wasn't surprised when he arrived at 33 Half Moon Street requesting the services of an operator.
[00:03:50] Unknown:
His story, however, was interesting in the extreme. Well, it's the first time I've seen you in your office, Mason.
[00:03:56] Unknown:
Quite an interesting setup you have here. Tell me, do you make good your boast to do anything anywhere at any time? We most certainly do, sir William.
[00:04:06] Unknown:
Oh, well, you have confidence, if nothing else. But what is it you want us to do?
[00:04:10] Unknown:
An enemy by his spirits has hit upon rather a good idea. At least, I think it's a good idea. He's bought an old Mississippi showboat and headed towed across the Atlantic. His intention is to sail this old craft up the Thames, putting on modern entertainment in an old fashioned setting. Oh, it it is a good idea. Yeah. Well, naturally, the showboat is heavily insured, mainly against fire. As you know, these old boats are built of timber, and the boilers are steamed with with with coal bunkers. I wouldn't normally be worried, but I I I think the man will probably make a fortune. But I have investigated the owner, and I've discovered that he is a small time racketeer and gambler. Oh, well, that does put a different complexion on things.
Oh, I may be wrong, of course, but I want a man on permanent fire duty just to keep an eye on things. Will there be any objection from this American?
[00:05:03] Unknown:
What's his name by the way? Seamus Campbell.
[00:05:06] Unknown:
No. There will be no objection. In fact, it's written into the articles of insurance that we can have a man permanently on board in the supervisory capacity. Oh, then it's quite straightforward. One of my senior operators is an American
[00:05:18] Unknown:
so he should get on well with his owner. Well, excellent. Excellent. When and where do you want him to report?
[00:05:24] Unknown:
This time tomorrow at Gravesend Dock. He'll have no trouble in finding the showboat. I expect it'll create quite a stir sailing up the River Thames. Hear me there, sir William.
[00:05:34] Unknown:
His name's Canon by the way. You need have no fears about his ability. He's what the Americans refer to as a a very tough baby.
[00:05:42] Unknown:
Canon ish?
[00:05:44] Unknown:
Well, if there is anything phony about Mr Seamus Camber you may rest assured that Canon will sort things out for you.
[00:06:08] Unknown:
Hello there. Anybody on board? I guess with you buster. What are you doing, I'll board my shirt. Oh, I didn't come for a conference with Mark Twain. Very, very fine. Are you one of the comedians on next week's show? My name's Cannon. I represent the North London Insurance Company. If you find anything funny about that have a good laugh. Now what does the insurance company want with me? They have a sizeable interest in this old riverboat. I'm here to protect that interest. You, I take it, are mr. Seamus Campbell. That's right. What are you gonna do on board? Well, mosey around after people and see they stub out their cigarettes on the telephone.
In short Mr. Campbell, I'm here to protect your showboat against the ravages of fire. I've got my own fire protection. I don't need any more help. Oh don't worry friend, I'm for free. All expenses paid by sir William Hedges. It's written in the insurance clause that the company can provide an extra guard. I'm it. Okay, but I'll get in my hair. I got a show to put on here the night after next. I don't want any of my customers upset by an insurance watchdog. That's alright, I promise to close the blind eye to the poker games and the shimanda fire. It gives you the idea I'm gonna run a gambling joint on board this tub. Well, you're not gonna run dollars in for the ship's log, that's for sure.
Now what's the crew anyway or do you stoke up those fires yourself? The crew comes aboard tomorrow, somebody. Meantime you and I can rest nice and cozy on board. So you can take it easy mister Cannon. If anybody sets fire to the show board it can only be you or me.
[00:07:44] Unknown:
As I said before, sir William Hedges is well known to me. Since I had already dispatched Cameron as car guard on the showboat, I was naturally a little surprised at the request from a gentleman who arrived the following morning in my office. He was announced by miss Fairweather.
[00:07:58] Unknown:
A mister Duke Delaney to see you, sir. What's it in connection with, miss Fairweather? Something about a guard on board a showboat. Is he from the North London Insurance Company? I don't think so, sir. By his accent he's an American. Delaney? Duke Delaney, sir. Are you sure it's not a Mr. Campbell? Quite sure, sir. Alright. Show him
[00:08:20] Unknown:
in. Mr. Delaney? That's right, sir. I do come in. No. Thank you. Amateur.
[00:08:25] Unknown:
Thank you. I understand from the switchboard girl that you're connected with Mr. Seamus Camber's showboat. In a way, yes. I have certain fixed it and fittings on board which are on loan to Seamus Camber. Since they are on loan, I wanted the services of a man to, well, to keep an eye on things. Are you concerned with theft or fire, mister DeLayne? Oh, fire mostly. I'm getting to understand that the old Mississippi showboats are anything but stable. In fact, I was reading a report the other day where in 1913
[00:08:54] Unknown:
two showboats engaged in a race up the river blew up. Well, surely it's not Campbell's intention to race up the River Thames. I mean, what would well, what would you race against? This is the only showboat in England.
[00:09:07] Unknown:
I'd like to be quite frank with you, mister Mason. Seamus Canberra doesn't enjoy the greatest reputation for honesty in The States. Then I'll be equally frank with you.
[00:09:17] Unknown:
The vessel is insured by the North London Insurance Company and they have already engaged the services of one of my operators who is at this moment on board the showboat keeping a watch against fire. Is he reliable? Thoroughly.
[00:09:28] Unknown:
Oh, then there's little point in my engaging anyone, is there?
[00:09:32] Unknown:
Well, perhaps if you gave me a list of the furniture and effects that you have on board the ship, I could have my man keep a special eye on them. I'm really interested in the prints in the smoker room.
[00:09:42] Unknown:
Have you ever been on board a showboat, Mr. Mason? No, I haven't. Oh, well, it's traditional that the smoker room was decorated with a prints of paintings by the great masters. In the Hellsican days of the gold rush, they had real paintings on the walls. Well, in later days, they were substituted for prints. Now the ones on board the River Queen have little commercial value, but now they hold great sentimental attachment for me. If anything should happen to the boat, I'd be more grateful if your man could rescue those prints and bring them to the office here.' You know, mister Delaney, I never met Seamus Camber. He must be quite an interesting gentleman.
[00:10:15] Unknown:
Yet I feel that, well, although he's generally at loggerheads with the law, it doesn't strike me as a practical proposition to tell an old showboat 3,000 miles across the Atlantic, well, just to set fire to it for the insurance.
[00:10:28] Unknown:
'Cambra's mind works in devious ways. I hope that his intentions for once are of the best however. If your man can keep an eye on the prince for me I'll be most grateful and of course happy to pay any reasonable fee. Very well mister Delaney. I'll see that Canon has instructed in that regard. Ah, thank you. That's put my mind at rest. I'm glad to hear it. But it's more than I can say that Cannon and Seamus Campbell.
[00:10:57] Unknown:
Who's there? Well, that's clear. Campbell said he and I were the only two people on board. Where did that come from? Uh-huh. That was in this cupboard. All of them. What are you doing in here? Are you Mr Campbell? No I'm not, I'm the ship's guard. I repeat what are you doing in here? I didn't want to be seen and when I heard someone coming I thought I'd hide in the cupboard. What are you hiding from and who are you anyway? I'm Constance Maston. American. From Connecticut. Okay, give.
[00:11:32] Unknown:
I came on board to have a look round. I'm in show business and I heard that Seamus Camber was engaging acts for the showboat. Well Seamus Camber's topside right now. Come with me, I'll take you to him. Oh, not right now. There was no time like the person. I'd rather not go right away. I, I heard you tell that Camba has an unsavory reputation.
[00:11:49] Unknown:
You know something, I'm beginning to stack my chips on this guy's table. Nobody has a good word to say for him and yet his business seems legitimate enough. If you're from Connecticut you must have a work permit to perform on this showboat. Maybe you'd like to show it to me. I haven't got it with me. Passport? Why all the questions? Look baby, it's all the same to me whether you answer my questions here or in the local coffee shop. Can't you give me just an hour? You know, I have an idea that you stowed away on this tub and got yourself a free tour across the Atlantic. That being the case I want you investigated by the cops. Nothing personal, just part of my duties as the guard around it. Hey, Ken, come on out here.
Okay mister Camber. Hey, you come back here. What's going on down here? I'm locked in, I'm here in the smoker room. How did you lock yourself in here? A broad locked me in. A broad. What broad? You've gone out of your mind, we are the only two people on board this tub. Look Mr Campbell, that door was locked from the outside. Check? Check. Then how you figure I locked myself in from the outside? Yeah, that makes sense. The door was locked from the outside. Well, she was in here hiding in a cupboard. Here on the showboat? That's what I said. You, you must be crazy. Well, crazy or not there was a doll right here in this cupboard. Come over here, come here. Now take a deep breath.
Yeah. Perfume. That's right and I don't use that particular brand of perfume. What about the girl doing here? I don't know mister Cameron but I've got a funny feeling that there's an awful lot of people who'd like to see your enterprise grow up in smoke and that's no maybe.
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[00:15:21] Unknown:
Everyone, it seemed, was apprehensive over the intentions of Mr Seamus Camber, one time gambler and racketeer from The Bronx. However, to all outward appearances, Mr Camber was conducting his affairs in an honest and straightforward manner, and I could find no real cause for alarm. Two days later, prompted with pertinent advertising, the showboat got on its way up the River Thames, loaded with sightseers and the party spirit. The vessel was now fully crewed, steam was up in the boilers, and a good orchestra pounded out lively music to an enthusiastic audience in the smoke room. Having inspected the ship's furnaces and found everything in order, Canon was relaxing at a table in the corner.
'Hello, Cameron.
[00:16:07] Unknown:
Everything in order?' 'Apple pie order, chief.' how about the boilers?' well, Cameron has a crew of Lascar Firemen who seem to know their job and, he's running on half steam.'
[00:16:17] Unknown:
'Sir Sir William's fears were groundless.' 'Looks like it.' Have you seen Duke de Leonay? The man who owns a prince? No. Why is he so worried about a few prince anyway? Oh, there's no accounting for taste. Anyway, you have your orders. If anything should happen on board, you must first ascertain the cause of the trouble then rescue his prince and get them ashore into our office. Okay. Got it. Why mister Mason, I didn't expect to see you here. Hello mister Delaney. Well, looks as though you're clear for grandness. I hope you're right. Now I don't think you've met my senior operator, have you? Cannon meet mr. Duke Delaney. How do you do? Nice to know you, mr. Cannon.
[00:16:52] Unknown:
How are the boilers? Oh, just good. You know, a matey cambers got something after all. It is just like the old days on the Mississippi River. Oh, not that I remember them. Oh, too long ago for me, but well, I figured that this gimmick will go down big with the Londoners on the Thames. Hi there, gentlemen. Having a good time? Just great. Shouldn't you be fire watching?
[00:17:13] Unknown:
Well, there's not much to worry about on board this ship mister Cameron. These friends of yours. This is my chief Aubrey Mason and, Duke Doreen you already know. See you later fellas, I've, I just spotted a particular friend of mine. What did you say that last one was? Now. Oh, I like her. I engaged her yesterday. What name did she get? Connie Maston. Why? Well, what's the girl who locked me in this smoke alarm the day before yesterday, are you dancing? What's all this about Campbell? Well, mister Camber here and myself were the only two people on board the River Queen the day before yesterday and I came down into the smoker room here and but I found that girl hiding in a cupboard. Well, did she give you any explanation? She she said she was in show business and was looking for a job on the show bus. Right. And like you see, she got the job.
Look, mister Canberra, I, I know it's maybe none of my business, but, have you ever met that board before? Never saw her before in my life. What are you worried about? So she came aboard for a job and she got the job. There's something funny about this setup and I wish I knew what it was. Look buddy, somebody told you I got a record back in The States? Yeah. Yeah. I thought so. All for once my business enterprise is on the level, real level.
[00:18:42] Unknown:
Don't you forget
[00:18:45] Unknown:
it. Well, that's my cue. Stick to your job, Tanner, and I'll stick to mine. Okay.
[00:18:50] Unknown:
Well, well, you seem to have upset the gentleman but there is something funny about this sir up chief. Well, when Mr Campbell's around you, you should keep your ideas to yourself. Chief,
[00:19:00] Unknown:
who hired the, furniture and effects to Seamus Cameron? Duke Delaney. That's why I wanted you to
[00:19:07] Unknown:
' 'Of course.
[00:19:08] Unknown:
When you introduced me, you also introduced Delaney and Kemba didn't know it. 'So now you think there's something phony.' well, it is rather odd, isn't it?' 'Camber doesn't know the man from whom he hired the prince on the war, but he does know the girl who was stowed away on his ship and is now working in his cabaret. I'm going down to take another look at those boilers. I think that maybe if we're not careful, we'll have a problem on our end that's too hot to handle.
[00:19:35] Unknown:
Camber inspected every inch of the Sherbet but could find nothing wrong anywhere. He began to think his fears would grant us and that the Camber enterprise, well, was in good faith after all. His misgivings would have returned with alacrity had he been able to overhear a conversation between Camber and Delaney just before midnight when the cabaret was ended and the gambling began. The mysterious Constance Masten was sitting with them at a table in the now empty smokeroom. Camber was flushed by the evening's entertainment.
[00:20:04] Unknown:
Oh, I don't mind telling you, mister Delaney, this is the first legit enterprise that I ever attempted. I don't want you to think I'm boasting when I say it's been successful beyond my wireless hostel. It's not the first time a camera has gone straight. Oh, gambling's legal in this country. You, you mean you still have a brother? Oh, not on board the river Queen. This is strictly for entertainment. I must compliment you on the entertainment. Oh Connie, best find I ever made. Why thank you kind sir, she said. That, watchdog, the insurance company, Canon, had some crazy notion that he had met you a few days ago.
[00:20:36] Unknown:
He's crazy.
[00:20:38] Unknown:
Yeah, seems like everybody's slightly crazy on board this tub. Tell me, if gambling's not in your line how come the poker game up on the bridge? Oh, just my personal friends. You interested? Yeah, I like a game now and again. Anything in mind? Anything in mind? Do you know who? I wasn't thinking of small stakes. I had something bigger in mind. Such as, Like I was wondering if you could get 20 knots out of this old tub. Oh, just a matter of steam, yeah. Gentlemen's modulate of steam in the bar. It might be safer. Yeah, I guess it would at that. You'd lose your money anyway, Shannon. What money? Success has gone to your head.
I'll wait to $5,000
[00:21:16] Unknown:
that this old tub can't do 20 knots. Have nothing to do with it Mr Cameron. Hi Ollie, did you say $5,000
[00:21:23] Unknown:
I did and what's more I got it right here in hard cash.
[00:21:27] Unknown:
Covered. Please Mr Cameron, remember when the river queen was built? Oh, do you think my ship has adoured you? You're on. Oh no. Why are you so worried miss Master? Forget about her, this is my ship. Dollars 5,000 is it for 20 knots. Yep, my money's on the table. Okay, okay, let's get down to the engine room. Come on you monkeys, get the cold on a fresh.
[00:21:56] Unknown:
What's it reading, Johnny? It seemed not you haven't gone any faster. I'm
[00:22:14] Unknown:
your mind? How you keep your nose out of this? Get that coal on the furnace. There's a $50 boiler for each and every one of them. You'll make 20 knots on the day. Mister Campbell, listen to me. Those boilers are old. They can't take that measure of scale. Delaney laid the debt, and I'm gonna win it once a gambler, always a gambler. But what about the insurance if anything goes wrong? There's nothing in the article that's yet I can't sail my ship at any speed I like. But if something goes wrong, your business goes with it. I can always pick up another showboat. Don't kid yourself. If this old cub found us, you'll never get another holiday maker within 10 miles of a showboat. He's right mister Camber. I stand and lose $5,000. You'll lose your boots if you carry on. Where is Delaney anyway? He's in the wheelhouse.
Tell me something mister Camber, have you ever met group Delaney before tonight? Oh I never did but he challenged me and nobody's gonna say that Seamus Camber, chicken on a bed. Hey. Look, you'll never live to collect that waiter if you don't chicken out of here right now. Come on baby, leave this crazy guy. Come on. You gotta pay it to us folks. Where are you going? Swogal. Got some unfinished business to attend. How does that over your burner house? I'll be quick like a burnished.
[00:23:23] Unknown:
So you got here at last. Delight me.
[00:23:26] Unknown:
What sort of crazy bit was that delay with Camber?
[00:23:29] Unknown:
You knew he wouldn't refuse. If he doesn't make 20 knots, I get $5,000. Look, if you know what's good for you, you get out of here fast. What about my prints? We're still afloat, aren't we? Don't forget I paid you to look after them. If it any happens, I'll be show both. I'm taking them right now. Alright. See you in your office later. Get them. Get them. Where's Camber? Camber, where is he?
[00:23:54] Unknown:
Yeah. Right here. Well, what did Alaska say? You're right, Cam. I know it's the point of the back of the seams. The crew's already in a long boat. Okay. Join them. You too, baby. What here to do? Look for Delaney. He's already left in my dinghy. Well, that wraps it up. Come on,
[00:24:11] Unknown:
away. What's the time miss maston? A quarter of four.
[00:24:14] Unknown:
And what's keeping him? He'll be here. I only hope he doesn't get tough. Well that's where you and me differ miss maston.
[00:24:21] Unknown:
Nothing will give me greater pleasure than to personally teach Duke Delaney a lesson.
[00:24:26] Unknown:
That's probably him now. Miss Marston, go into the inside office with Canon. You know what to do when he claims the prince. I know. Come on, Canon.
[00:24:37] Unknown:
Come in.
[00:24:40] Unknown:
Oh, morning, mister Mason.
[00:24:42] Unknown:
Oh, come in. Come in.
[00:24:44] Unknown:
Oh, nice to get a wait up for me. A service is our motto. Did, it cannot get the prince over to you? Yes. He did. Not damaged, I hope. No. Not damaged.
[00:24:53] Unknown:
There they are on the table over there. Yeah. If you just look at them and, I'll see that they're in order. Oh.
[00:24:59] Unknown:
Yeah. Just as well I hired your man. I had a feeling that that guy Seamus Campbell would sink that showboat. Are you your prince, mister D'Elady? Yep. Thou mine. As you say, in perfect order. Good morning, mister D'Elady. Wow. If it isn't Connie Maston and Karen. Oh, nice to see you again. Not for long, Duke Delaney.
[00:25:20] Unknown:
I have a warrant here for your arrest. You got a what? I have to warn you to come quietly.
[00:25:27] Unknown:
Quietly. You heard Delaney. Has this torch singer gone out of her mind? Not a torch singer, Duke Delaney.
[00:25:33] Unknown:
Special officer Constance Marston of Interpol.
[00:25:47] Unknown:
Seamus Campbell, whom everybody suspected of double dealing, was in fact a reformed criminal whose intentions with this showboat were of the best. It was Duke Delaney who was the nefarious operator in the woodpile. Delaney had substituted two of the smoke room prints with genuine oils stolen from a wealthy American collector. He knew that he could never get them through customs, but they could be removed in an emergency from a sinking ship. He played on Seamus Camber's love of gambling, knowing that the old boilers on the showboat would never stand up to such a head of steam. Cameron therefore inadvertently brought the paintings ashore for him, but he reckoned without Constance Maston who was on his track from the very beginning.
She too suspected Camber at first, but Delaney overplayed his hand and walked right into the trap we prepared for him.
[00:27:02] Unknown:
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[00:00:15] Unknown:
I've been looking at the insurance policy for this Sherbert. It's due in The Thames tomorrow night. Premium is higher, but I see the sum insured is £50,000. No. Frankly, buddy, I'm a little worried. Worried, sir William. Yes. Looking at the specifications, I see that she was first constructed on the Mississippi in 1889 or timber construction, which is powered by a coal fed burner.
[00:00:46] Unknown:
Hence the fire hazard must be high. No doubt that's why the premium is so high.
[00:00:51] Unknown:
The actor probably knows his business but I'd like a special fire guard on board while she's here. Shall I get in touch with the London fire brigade? No. No. No. No. No. No. We must engage someone privately. Ring up this number, 595, and make an appointment for me to see a man called Aubrey Mason. Their offices are at 33 Half Moon Street.
[00:01:34] Unknown:
Shamest and the Showboat.
[00:01:43] Unknown:
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[00:02:48] Unknown:
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[00:03:34] Unknown:
Sir William Hedges was well known to me. He is in fact a member of my club. Knowing that he was concerned with a big insurance company in the city and much of our work is connected with this type of company, I wasn't surprised when he arrived at 33 Half Moon Street requesting the services of an operator.
[00:03:50] Unknown:
His story, however, was interesting in the extreme. Well, it's the first time I've seen you in your office, Mason.
[00:03:56] Unknown:
Quite an interesting setup you have here. Tell me, do you make good your boast to do anything anywhere at any time? We most certainly do, sir William.
[00:04:06] Unknown:
Oh, well, you have confidence, if nothing else. But what is it you want us to do?
[00:04:10] Unknown:
An enemy by his spirits has hit upon rather a good idea. At least, I think it's a good idea. He's bought an old Mississippi showboat and headed towed across the Atlantic. His intention is to sail this old craft up the Thames, putting on modern entertainment in an old fashioned setting. Oh, it it is a good idea. Yeah. Well, naturally, the showboat is heavily insured, mainly against fire. As you know, these old boats are built of timber, and the boilers are steamed with with with coal bunkers. I wouldn't normally be worried, but I I I think the man will probably make a fortune. But I have investigated the owner, and I've discovered that he is a small time racketeer and gambler. Oh, well, that does put a different complexion on things.
Oh, I may be wrong, of course, but I want a man on permanent fire duty just to keep an eye on things. Will there be any objection from this American?
[00:05:03] Unknown:
What's his name by the way? Seamus Campbell.
[00:05:06] Unknown:
No. There will be no objection. In fact, it's written into the articles of insurance that we can have a man permanently on board in the supervisory capacity. Oh, then it's quite straightforward. One of my senior operators is an American
[00:05:18] Unknown:
so he should get on well with his owner. Well, excellent. Excellent. When and where do you want him to report?
[00:05:24] Unknown:
This time tomorrow at Gravesend Dock. He'll have no trouble in finding the showboat. I expect it'll create quite a stir sailing up the River Thames. Hear me there, sir William.
[00:05:34] Unknown:
His name's Canon by the way. You need have no fears about his ability. He's what the Americans refer to as a a very tough baby.
[00:05:42] Unknown:
Canon ish?
[00:05:44] Unknown:
Well, if there is anything phony about Mr Seamus Camber you may rest assured that Canon will sort things out for you.
[00:06:08] Unknown:
Hello there. Anybody on board? I guess with you buster. What are you doing, I'll board my shirt. Oh, I didn't come for a conference with Mark Twain. Very, very fine. Are you one of the comedians on next week's show? My name's Cannon. I represent the North London Insurance Company. If you find anything funny about that have a good laugh. Now what does the insurance company want with me? They have a sizeable interest in this old riverboat. I'm here to protect that interest. You, I take it, are mr. Seamus Campbell. That's right. What are you gonna do on board? Well, mosey around after people and see they stub out their cigarettes on the telephone.
In short Mr. Campbell, I'm here to protect your showboat against the ravages of fire. I've got my own fire protection. I don't need any more help. Oh don't worry friend, I'm for free. All expenses paid by sir William Hedges. It's written in the insurance clause that the company can provide an extra guard. I'm it. Okay, but I'll get in my hair. I got a show to put on here the night after next. I don't want any of my customers upset by an insurance watchdog. That's alright, I promise to close the blind eye to the poker games and the shimanda fire. It gives you the idea I'm gonna run a gambling joint on board this tub. Well, you're not gonna run dollars in for the ship's log, that's for sure.
Now what's the crew anyway or do you stoke up those fires yourself? The crew comes aboard tomorrow, somebody. Meantime you and I can rest nice and cozy on board. So you can take it easy mister Cannon. If anybody sets fire to the show board it can only be you or me.
[00:07:44] Unknown:
As I said before, sir William Hedges is well known to me. Since I had already dispatched Cameron as car guard on the showboat, I was naturally a little surprised at the request from a gentleman who arrived the following morning in my office. He was announced by miss Fairweather.
[00:07:58] Unknown:
A mister Duke Delaney to see you, sir. What's it in connection with, miss Fairweather? Something about a guard on board a showboat. Is he from the North London Insurance Company? I don't think so, sir. By his accent he's an American. Delaney? Duke Delaney, sir. Are you sure it's not a Mr. Campbell? Quite sure, sir. Alright. Show him
[00:08:20] Unknown:
in. Mr. Delaney? That's right, sir. I do come in. No. Thank you. Amateur.
[00:08:25] Unknown:
Thank you. I understand from the switchboard girl that you're connected with Mr. Seamus Camber's showboat. In a way, yes. I have certain fixed it and fittings on board which are on loan to Seamus Camber. Since they are on loan, I wanted the services of a man to, well, to keep an eye on things. Are you concerned with theft or fire, mister DeLayne? Oh, fire mostly. I'm getting to understand that the old Mississippi showboats are anything but stable. In fact, I was reading a report the other day where in 1913
[00:08:54] Unknown:
two showboats engaged in a race up the river blew up. Well, surely it's not Campbell's intention to race up the River Thames. I mean, what would well, what would you race against? This is the only showboat in England.
[00:09:07] Unknown:
I'd like to be quite frank with you, mister Mason. Seamus Canberra doesn't enjoy the greatest reputation for honesty in The States. Then I'll be equally frank with you.
[00:09:17] Unknown:
The vessel is insured by the North London Insurance Company and they have already engaged the services of one of my operators who is at this moment on board the showboat keeping a watch against fire. Is he reliable? Thoroughly.
[00:09:28] Unknown:
Oh, then there's little point in my engaging anyone, is there?
[00:09:32] Unknown:
Well, perhaps if you gave me a list of the furniture and effects that you have on board the ship, I could have my man keep a special eye on them. I'm really interested in the prints in the smoker room.
[00:09:42] Unknown:
Have you ever been on board a showboat, Mr. Mason? No, I haven't. Oh, well, it's traditional that the smoker room was decorated with a prints of paintings by the great masters. In the Hellsican days of the gold rush, they had real paintings on the walls. Well, in later days, they were substituted for prints. Now the ones on board the River Queen have little commercial value, but now they hold great sentimental attachment for me. If anything should happen to the boat, I'd be more grateful if your man could rescue those prints and bring them to the office here.' You know, mister Delaney, I never met Seamus Camber. He must be quite an interesting gentleman.
[00:10:15] Unknown:
Yet I feel that, well, although he's generally at loggerheads with the law, it doesn't strike me as a practical proposition to tell an old showboat 3,000 miles across the Atlantic, well, just to set fire to it for the insurance.
[00:10:28] Unknown:
'Cambra's mind works in devious ways. I hope that his intentions for once are of the best however. If your man can keep an eye on the prince for me I'll be most grateful and of course happy to pay any reasonable fee. Very well mister Delaney. I'll see that Canon has instructed in that regard. Ah, thank you. That's put my mind at rest. I'm glad to hear it. But it's more than I can say that Cannon and Seamus Campbell.
[00:10:57] Unknown:
Who's there? Well, that's clear. Campbell said he and I were the only two people on board. Where did that come from? Uh-huh. That was in this cupboard. All of them. What are you doing in here? Are you Mr Campbell? No I'm not, I'm the ship's guard. I repeat what are you doing in here? I didn't want to be seen and when I heard someone coming I thought I'd hide in the cupboard. What are you hiding from and who are you anyway? I'm Constance Maston. American. From Connecticut. Okay, give.
[00:11:32] Unknown:
I came on board to have a look round. I'm in show business and I heard that Seamus Camber was engaging acts for the showboat. Well Seamus Camber's topside right now. Come with me, I'll take you to him. Oh, not right now. There was no time like the person. I'd rather not go right away. I, I heard you tell that Camba has an unsavory reputation.
[00:11:49] Unknown:
You know something, I'm beginning to stack my chips on this guy's table. Nobody has a good word to say for him and yet his business seems legitimate enough. If you're from Connecticut you must have a work permit to perform on this showboat. Maybe you'd like to show it to me. I haven't got it with me. Passport? Why all the questions? Look baby, it's all the same to me whether you answer my questions here or in the local coffee shop. Can't you give me just an hour? You know, I have an idea that you stowed away on this tub and got yourself a free tour across the Atlantic. That being the case I want you investigated by the cops. Nothing personal, just part of my duties as the guard around it. Hey, Ken, come on out here.
Okay mister Camber. Hey, you come back here. What's going on down here? I'm locked in, I'm here in the smoker room. How did you lock yourself in here? A broad locked me in. A broad. What broad? You've gone out of your mind, we are the only two people on board this tub. Look Mr Campbell, that door was locked from the outside. Check? Check. Then how you figure I locked myself in from the outside? Yeah, that makes sense. The door was locked from the outside. Well, she was in here hiding in a cupboard. Here on the showboat? That's what I said. You, you must be crazy. Well, crazy or not there was a doll right here in this cupboard. Come over here, come here. Now take a deep breath.
Yeah. Perfume. That's right and I don't use that particular brand of perfume. What about the girl doing here? I don't know mister Cameron but I've got a funny feeling that there's an awful lot of people who'd like to see your enterprise grow up in smoke and that's no maybe.
[00:13:45] Unknown:
The following classic Springbok Radio commercial comes to you with a courtesy of Springbok Radio Preservation Society of South Africa.
[00:13:55] Unknown:
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[00:14:20] Unknown:
Pepsodent.
[00:14:25] Unknown:
Pepsodent. Some things in life are obvious and easy. If you have a business providing a good service or selling a product, you need to let people know. But how do you do that? Easy. Just tell them here on springbokradio.com. Internet radio is about talking to people in their own homes. Your message becomes part of the sound they've chosen to listen to. To find out more about advertising on springbokradio.com, contact Dave Dupree on 0 1 6 7 8 5 5 1 7 6. Or for outside South Africa Two Seven Double One Six Seven Eight Five One Seven Six. Or email [email protected].
[00:15:21] Unknown:
Everyone, it seemed, was apprehensive over the intentions of Mr Seamus Camber, one time gambler and racketeer from The Bronx. However, to all outward appearances, Mr Camber was conducting his affairs in an honest and straightforward manner, and I could find no real cause for alarm. Two days later, prompted with pertinent advertising, the showboat got on its way up the River Thames, loaded with sightseers and the party spirit. The vessel was now fully crewed, steam was up in the boilers, and a good orchestra pounded out lively music to an enthusiastic audience in the smoke room. Having inspected the ship's furnaces and found everything in order, Canon was relaxing at a table in the corner.
'Hello, Cameron.
[00:16:07] Unknown:
Everything in order?' 'Apple pie order, chief.' how about the boilers?' well, Cameron has a crew of Lascar Firemen who seem to know their job and, he's running on half steam.'
[00:16:17] Unknown:
'Sir Sir William's fears were groundless.' 'Looks like it.' Have you seen Duke de Leonay? The man who owns a prince? No. Why is he so worried about a few prince anyway? Oh, there's no accounting for taste. Anyway, you have your orders. If anything should happen on board, you must first ascertain the cause of the trouble then rescue his prince and get them ashore into our office. Okay. Got it. Why mister Mason, I didn't expect to see you here. Hello mister Delaney. Well, looks as though you're clear for grandness. I hope you're right. Now I don't think you've met my senior operator, have you? Cannon meet mr. Duke Delaney. How do you do? Nice to know you, mr. Cannon.
[00:16:52] Unknown:
How are the boilers? Oh, just good. You know, a matey cambers got something after all. It is just like the old days on the Mississippi River. Oh, not that I remember them. Oh, too long ago for me, but well, I figured that this gimmick will go down big with the Londoners on the Thames. Hi there, gentlemen. Having a good time? Just great. Shouldn't you be fire watching?
[00:17:13] Unknown:
Well, there's not much to worry about on board this ship mister Cameron. These friends of yours. This is my chief Aubrey Mason and, Duke Doreen you already know. See you later fellas, I've, I just spotted a particular friend of mine. What did you say that last one was? Now. Oh, I like her. I engaged her yesterday. What name did she get? Connie Maston. Why? Well, what's the girl who locked me in this smoke alarm the day before yesterday, are you dancing? What's all this about Campbell? Well, mister Camber here and myself were the only two people on board the River Queen the day before yesterday and I came down into the smoker room here and but I found that girl hiding in a cupboard. Well, did she give you any explanation? She she said she was in show business and was looking for a job on the show bus. Right. And like you see, she got the job.
Look, mister Canberra, I, I know it's maybe none of my business, but, have you ever met that board before? Never saw her before in my life. What are you worried about? So she came aboard for a job and she got the job. There's something funny about this setup and I wish I knew what it was. Look buddy, somebody told you I got a record back in The States? Yeah. Yeah. I thought so. All for once my business enterprise is on the level, real level.
[00:18:42] Unknown:
Don't you forget
[00:18:45] Unknown:
it. Well, that's my cue. Stick to your job, Tanner, and I'll stick to mine. Okay.
[00:18:50] Unknown:
Well, well, you seem to have upset the gentleman but there is something funny about this sir up chief. Well, when Mr Campbell's around you, you should keep your ideas to yourself. Chief,
[00:19:00] Unknown:
who hired the, furniture and effects to Seamus Cameron? Duke Delaney. That's why I wanted you to
[00:19:07] Unknown:
' 'Of course.
[00:19:08] Unknown:
When you introduced me, you also introduced Delaney and Kemba didn't know it. 'So now you think there's something phony.' well, it is rather odd, isn't it?' 'Camber doesn't know the man from whom he hired the prince on the war, but he does know the girl who was stowed away on his ship and is now working in his cabaret. I'm going down to take another look at those boilers. I think that maybe if we're not careful, we'll have a problem on our end that's too hot to handle.
[00:19:35] Unknown:
Camber inspected every inch of the Sherbet but could find nothing wrong anywhere. He began to think his fears would grant us and that the Camber enterprise, well, was in good faith after all. His misgivings would have returned with alacrity had he been able to overhear a conversation between Camber and Delaney just before midnight when the cabaret was ended and the gambling began. The mysterious Constance Masten was sitting with them at a table in the now empty smokeroom. Camber was flushed by the evening's entertainment.
[00:20:04] Unknown:
Oh, I don't mind telling you, mister Delaney, this is the first legit enterprise that I ever attempted. I don't want you to think I'm boasting when I say it's been successful beyond my wireless hostel. It's not the first time a camera has gone straight. Oh, gambling's legal in this country. You, you mean you still have a brother? Oh, not on board the river Queen. This is strictly for entertainment. I must compliment you on the entertainment. Oh Connie, best find I ever made. Why thank you kind sir, she said. That, watchdog, the insurance company, Canon, had some crazy notion that he had met you a few days ago.
[00:20:36] Unknown:
He's crazy.
[00:20:38] Unknown:
Yeah, seems like everybody's slightly crazy on board this tub. Tell me, if gambling's not in your line how come the poker game up on the bridge? Oh, just my personal friends. You interested? Yeah, I like a game now and again. Anything in mind? Anything in mind? Do you know who? I wasn't thinking of small stakes. I had something bigger in mind. Such as, Like I was wondering if you could get 20 knots out of this old tub. Oh, just a matter of steam, yeah. Gentlemen's modulate of steam in the bar. It might be safer. Yeah, I guess it would at that. You'd lose your money anyway, Shannon. What money? Success has gone to your head.
I'll wait to $5,000
[00:21:16] Unknown:
that this old tub can't do 20 knots. Have nothing to do with it Mr Cameron. Hi Ollie, did you say $5,000
[00:21:23] Unknown:
I did and what's more I got it right here in hard cash.
[00:21:27] Unknown:
Covered. Please Mr Cameron, remember when the river queen was built? Oh, do you think my ship has adoured you? You're on. Oh no. Why are you so worried miss Master? Forget about her, this is my ship. Dollars 5,000 is it for 20 knots. Yep, my money's on the table. Okay, okay, let's get down to the engine room. Come on you monkeys, get the cold on a fresh.
[00:21:56] Unknown:
What's it reading, Johnny? It seemed not you haven't gone any faster. I'm
[00:22:14] Unknown:
your mind? How you keep your nose out of this? Get that coal on the furnace. There's a $50 boiler for each and every one of them. You'll make 20 knots on the day. Mister Campbell, listen to me. Those boilers are old. They can't take that measure of scale. Delaney laid the debt, and I'm gonna win it once a gambler, always a gambler. But what about the insurance if anything goes wrong? There's nothing in the article that's yet I can't sail my ship at any speed I like. But if something goes wrong, your business goes with it. I can always pick up another showboat. Don't kid yourself. If this old cub found us, you'll never get another holiday maker within 10 miles of a showboat. He's right mister Camber. I stand and lose $5,000. You'll lose your boots if you carry on. Where is Delaney anyway? He's in the wheelhouse.
Tell me something mister Camber, have you ever met group Delaney before tonight? Oh I never did but he challenged me and nobody's gonna say that Seamus Camber, chicken on a bed. Hey. Look, you'll never live to collect that waiter if you don't chicken out of here right now. Come on baby, leave this crazy guy. Come on. You gotta pay it to us folks. Where are you going? Swogal. Got some unfinished business to attend. How does that over your burner house? I'll be quick like a burnished.
[00:23:23] Unknown:
So you got here at last. Delight me.
[00:23:26] Unknown:
What sort of crazy bit was that delay with Camber?
[00:23:29] Unknown:
You knew he wouldn't refuse. If he doesn't make 20 knots, I get $5,000. Look, if you know what's good for you, you get out of here fast. What about my prints? We're still afloat, aren't we? Don't forget I paid you to look after them. If it any happens, I'll be show both. I'm taking them right now. Alright. See you in your office later. Get them. Get them. Where's Camber? Camber, where is he?
[00:23:54] Unknown:
Yeah. Right here. Well, what did Alaska say? You're right, Cam. I know it's the point of the back of the seams. The crew's already in a long boat. Okay. Join them. You too, baby. What here to do? Look for Delaney. He's already left in my dinghy. Well, that wraps it up. Come on,
[00:24:11] Unknown:
away. What's the time miss maston? A quarter of four.
[00:24:14] Unknown:
And what's keeping him? He'll be here. I only hope he doesn't get tough. Well that's where you and me differ miss maston.
[00:24:21] Unknown:
Nothing will give me greater pleasure than to personally teach Duke Delaney a lesson.
[00:24:26] Unknown:
That's probably him now. Miss Marston, go into the inside office with Canon. You know what to do when he claims the prince. I know. Come on, Canon.
[00:24:37] Unknown:
Come in.
[00:24:40] Unknown:
Oh, morning, mister Mason.
[00:24:42] Unknown:
Oh, come in. Come in.
[00:24:44] Unknown:
Oh, nice to get a wait up for me. A service is our motto. Did, it cannot get the prince over to you? Yes. He did. Not damaged, I hope. No. Not damaged.
[00:24:53] Unknown:
There they are on the table over there. Yeah. If you just look at them and, I'll see that they're in order. Oh.
[00:24:59] Unknown:
Yeah. Just as well I hired your man. I had a feeling that that guy Seamus Campbell would sink that showboat. Are you your prince, mister D'Elady? Yep. Thou mine. As you say, in perfect order. Good morning, mister D'Elady. Wow. If it isn't Connie Maston and Karen. Oh, nice to see you again. Not for long, Duke Delaney.
[00:25:20] Unknown:
I have a warrant here for your arrest. You got a what? I have to warn you to come quietly.
[00:25:27] Unknown:
Quietly. You heard Delaney. Has this torch singer gone out of her mind? Not a torch singer, Duke Delaney.
[00:25:33] Unknown:
Special officer Constance Marston of Interpol.
[00:25:47] Unknown:
Seamus Campbell, whom everybody suspected of double dealing, was in fact a reformed criminal whose intentions with this showboat were of the best. It was Duke Delaney who was the nefarious operator in the woodpile. Delaney had substituted two of the smoke room prints with genuine oils stolen from a wealthy American collector. He knew that he could never get them through customs, but they could be removed in an emergency from a sinking ship. He played on Seamus Camber's love of gambling, knowing that the old boilers on the showboat would never stand up to such a head of steam. Cameron therefore inadvertently brought the paintings ashore for him, but he reckoned without Constance Maston who was on his track from the very beginning.
She too suspected Camber at first, but Delaney overplayed his hand and walked right into the trap we prepared for him.
[00:27:02] Unknown:
The game is on the line, and I've only got a shot clock's worth of time to tell you about Subway's six ninety nine foot long deal. That's right. Order now on the Subway app and get any foot long on the menu for just $6.99. Fresh sliced deli meat, fresh crispy veggies, too much good stuff. Get it now on the Subway app. Any foot long for just $6.99. Use code 699FL now. Only here for a limited time. Redeemable at participating US restaurants. Subway app online orders only. Add ons additional plus tax. Additional fees apply on delivery. Excludes footlong snacks. Limited time.
